Keri collapsed onto her couch with a smile. She and the rest of Ink Blast had trained for hours, starting on the training fields within the Splat League building and then playing some casual matches. It was a bit hard to integrate into their team dynamic, but it was also a lot of fun, and the looks on the other team's faces when they realized who they were playing against were hilarious.

They ended up winning most of those games.

Her phone buzzed in her pocket, and she pulled it out.

Agent 2: Sup three. We just got off work. Spill the beans on that audition info.

You: I got in

Agent 2: Hey, congrats. That's really awesome.

Agent 2: Callie says she told you so.

You: Tell her to shut up

Agent 2: Yeah I already did.

You: Sweet thanks

Agent 2: You gotta get over here. We're gonna throw a party for you.

You: Come on I'm busy

You: Also that's totally unnecessary

Agent 2: You're not, and it isn't.

You: I don't like parties

Agent 2: Well tough shit cause there's also a briefing you need to get in person.

You: Oh my god. Why didn't you tell me two days ago when we were literally all right there together?

Agent 2: We hadn't fully gone over the intel. Also didn't feel like it.

Keri sighed, tiredly and heavily. Fucking. Marie. Come on.

You: Fine. I'll come. Just give me a few minutes to write this battler bio for the tournament or whatever

Agent 2: Sure thing, three. See you soon.

Agent 2: ;)

Keri glared at Marie's dumb winky face for a few seconds in disgust before turning to her laptop. She opened the seamail Halley had sent her, clicked on the link, and began to type.

Keri arrived at the Squid Sisters' place a bit later in the afternoon, the sun falling down towards the horizon. The duo lived in a permanent suite at the top of New Albacore Hotel, because of course they did. She didn't get the whole thing of celebrities living in hotels. Was it just to show how rich they were? But Callie and Marie weren't like that, really. Well, maybe Callie was, a bit. Perhaps it was just becauses the hotel was close to the studio, and so it was convenient? Maybe it was for privacy reasons? The hotel would probably handle security for them and prevent fans from raiding their home and stuff.

She should ask sometime. She probably never actually would, but she should.

A staff member stopped her as she approached the top floor.

"Do you have business with one of the permanent residents?"

"I'm meeting Callie and Marie? I'm Keri Avony?"

The dude looked down at a list he was holding. "Uhh… oh, yup, you're on here. Alright, room 2506."

"Yeah, I know where it is," she said, taking to the halls. She arrived at suite 2506 in just a few seconds, and approached the door.

She had barely knocked before the door slammed open, revealing Callie's ecstatic face. "Keri! Come in!"

She practically pulled her into their suite. It was, as usual, split into bubbles of chaotic mess and delicate order, depending on which cousin dwelled primarily in that area. Marie came running out of the kitchen, holding something in her hands. Was that… was that a cake?

"Is that a cake?"

"Yep," Marie said. "You got onto a pro team. That's a big deal."

"You're finally gonna be famous!" Callie said. "I knew we'd rub off on you eventually."

Keri stared at the cake. It had fancy orange frosting, and one of those big candles in the shape of a three for when kids turn three years old. Of course it did. Goddammit. "Where did you even get a cake so quickly?"

"Keri, we're the Squid Sisters," Marie said, as if that explained everything. She cut off a few slices and handed plates to Keri and Callie, and they moved over to the table.

"So, you said you had some briefing to give me?" Keri asked, taking a bite. It was definitely store bought, but she knew that already; Callie and Marie didn't cook so much as they burnt.

Callie held up a finger. "Uh uh uh! We can get to that later. First, you need to tell us the whole story here."

"What do you mean?" Keri wasn't sure she wanted to know.

"Look at it from our perspective," Marie said, in that very Marie way of hers. "Our friend and coworker, who never says anything about her life, suddenly drops the bomb that, oh, yeah, she auditioned to be on a pro battling team for a tournament that we host. Obviously, you were really excited or nervous or something, because you would normally wait until you were sure you got in before saying anything, and even then you'd probably just let us find out ourselves during the newbie meet & greet. There's clearly a story here."

Keri sighed. "Well, I guess the 'story' is just that I've always been a fan of Ink Blast. I started watching the League during its first year, and I just thought Tentaclaw and Brella Knight were so cool with their special techniques. There weren't a lot of other players back then who had developed such unique play styles, you know? So when I heard they were holding auditions, I jumped on it. And then I got in. So now I'm like. Doing this." She let out a breath. "I'm still kind of processing it."

Callie snorted. "Yeah, we can tell. So, what's your pro name?"

Oh, god. Here we go. "Well, um. It's 'Hero.' "

"Ooh! I like it. It's simple, but I think it fits you," Callie said.

"What, like a superhero?" Marie asked.

"Not… really." Keri gulped. "More like a. Like a secret agent hero."

Silence. Silence and her internal screaming.

"…Please be kidding," Marie said.

Keri shook her head. "I wish. They noticed that I exclusively use hero weapons, and they were like, 'Oh, that would make a great theme, you know?' It wasn't my idea!"

"But it was your idea to say yes," Callie pointed out.

"They were very persuasive. Plus, let's be honest, it's a pretty fresh theme. I mean, I know for a fact that at least a third of the secret agents are certified badasses; who wouldn't want to emulate that?"

Marie put her face in her hands. "Why are you like this, Three?"

"It shouldn't be that big a deal, guys! Literally nobody's seen me as an agent, it's not like they'd recognize me!"

Marie sighed. "I guess it's okay. Just be careful, okay?"

Keri smiled. "I'm always careful." Callie laughed. Which was really very rude of her. "Look, can we move into the briefing now? Did you two actually discover something useful for once?"

"Sure, may as well." Keri could see Marie's head switching gears into Agent Mode. "So, we found out that after you captured Octavio, a few Octolings that served under him actually defected."

"Apparently he was using some sort of mind control to keep them in line," Callie explained. "The Calamari Inkantation freed them, and some of them tried to escape from the underground so that they wouldn't have to serve the Octarians anymore." That was fair, Keri thought. If she'd been mind controlled into fighting someone who had already splatted hundreds of soldiers single handedly, she wouldn't be very happy about it either.

Callie smiled. "I always knew that turning an ancient ritual into a pop song would be a good idea."

Marie shot her a look before continuing. "Right, well, a few of the Octolings who managed to escape the underground—which wasn't many, actually, most got captured—came here to Inkopolis. We got in contact with one of them, and she agreed to meet with the New Squidbeak Splatoon tomorrow evening."

"Oh, shit," Keri said. This was big. She probably had all sorts of useful intel on the Octarian operations.

"Oh shit's right," Marie said. "But we still don't know if we can trust her. She said she'd be bringing an Inkling along with her—the Inkling who found her, housed her, taught her about Inkling society, all that stuff. I'm inclined to believe she's telling us the truth, but just to be sure, come in incognito gear and with an ink tank."

"You mean like those sunglasses and bandana you two were wearing when we first met?" Keri asked. "You seriously think that'll fool her?"

"Fooled you."

Keri frowned. "I—fine."

"Meet us at the shack at ten," Callie said, stuffing another piece of cake into her mouth. "Gramps had something to take care of, so he won't be there."

"Alright. Well, if that's all, I'm gonna go."

Callie rolled her eyes. "Ugh, fine, be that way. See you tomorrow, Keri! And then at the Newbie Meet & Greet, too, right?"

"Don't remind me." Keri scowled as she reached for the door handle. "Well, anyway, bye."

Callie threw her a salute. "See ya."

"Staaaaaaaay fresh," Marie droned, with a completely straight face, in the most deadpan voice possible.

"Shut up," Keri said, and closed the door behind her.

The next day, Keri found herself having lunch out in the Plaza with her friend Ben. He was an old pal she'd known back in Saltwater County, where they'd grown up, but his family had moved to Inkopolis when they were younger. They'd stayed in touch over the internet, but it hadn't been until Keri had moved to Inkopolis herself a year ago that they'd seen each other again.

They were eating at a small table outside one of the various restaurants in the Plaza. There weren't as many people around here as there once was, what with the Square's quickly growing popularity. Keri liked it; it was quieter here, now.

"…and so business has really picked up, which sucks, because now my manager wants me to work a double shift, and—" Ben sighed, blowing out a strained breath and screwing his eyes closed. "Well, anyway, how's your job going?" He worked as a waiter, and enjoyed it about as much as one would expect. "What is it you do again?"

"My job's going alright," she said, dodging neatly around that second question. "I actually just landed a second one, which I'm pretty excited about."

"Really? Where?"

She smiled. "It's a secret."

Ben leveled a stare at her. "Keri?"

"Don't worry about it," she giggled. "You'll find out eventually. Didn't you have some exciting news to tell me or something?"

He looked at her suspiciously, but must've decided it wasn't worth it, and moved on. "Yeah. you know how me and some of my friends around here play Turf Wars together a bunch?"

Keri nodded. She'd only met the rest of Ben's team a couple of times, but they seemed like nice enough people.

"Well, we're entering the junior tournament for the Splat League. Maeve finally turned sixteen this year, so we all qualify now."

"Really? That's super exciting!" Keri said. The two of them had always shared their love of professional Turf Wars, and Ben had been talking for a while now about the Junior Leagues. "You need to tell me when your matches are so I can cheer you on."

Ben smiled. "Thanks, I will." He paused. "You should find a team, you know. You're way better than me at battling anyway, so you're definitely good enough, and I think you'd really enjoy it."

"Yeah, maybe I should," Keri said, winking.

"Why did you just wink at me?" he asked. "What's going on? Am I missing something?"

"Don't worry about it," she said again, laughing.

"I'm really starting to worry about it, honestly."

Keri just smiled and dug into her food.

They ate in comfortable silence for a time; Keri always got the Salmon Sandwich at this place. She idly wondered if they just called it that, or if it was made from actual Salmonid meat. I mean, they had to get the meat from somewhere, right? Inklings were omnivores after all, and she knew that ancient squids had even been purely carnivorous. Maybe she should just enjoy it and not think about it too hard?

Ben snapped his fingers and made a soft 'Oh' sound, interrupting Keri's thoughts. (Probably for the best.) "I almost forgot—me and my friends are going to the Newbie Meet & Greet for Splat League, if you wanna come. I know you're probably excited for Ink Blast's new member, but, personally, I can't wait to see who Cephalosquad's brought on."

Excuse me? Cephalosquad? Really? Come on. "Sorry, I'm busy that day," she said. She winked again, just for good measure. "But you'll have to tell me all the details!"

"Sure thing, Keri. And stop winking. It's super unsettling."

She laughed. "No."

Keri strolled into a general clothing store in Arowana Mall. Coral Style, it called itself. She liked it here; it wasn't very expensive, and it was pretty casual, which she appreciated. She approached a clerk—some species of crustacean—who was wandering around the store aimlessly and trying not to make eye contact with anyone.

"Excuse me, sir?" He turned and tried to look like wanted to be here. "I'm looking for a cape and something to obscure my face."

The employee performed a long, tired blink. "Run that by me one more time?"

"I said I'm looking for a cape and something to obscure my face," Keri repeated.

He buried his face in his claws and let out a long sigh. "Yeah, follow me. I think we've got exactly what you're looking for. For some reason."

See? What a great store.

Agent 3 flipped through the grate, switching back to her Inkling form and landing solidly on the soles of her combat boots. She caught sight of the shack off in the distance, and the two shadily-dresses figures standing outside it. Agents 1 and 2 were in their full incognito gear; Agent 1 was wearing her beanie and sunglasses, and Agent 2 had her face mask and cap on. Three approached them, and they turned to her footsteps.

"Nice to see you, Ag—" Agent 1 stopped dead in her tracks when she saw what Three was wearing. "Oh my actual fucking god. Is that a cape?"

Agent 2 burst into laughter, practically wheezing. "I'm dying… you look so edgy…"

Three's face immediately reddened. "Hey, shut up! Capes are awesome!"

"Three, please, stop," Agent 2 gasped out between laughs. "You're killing me. Oh my god, and the skull bandana around your mouth, HA! I'm going to die, I can't take this!"

Agent 1 screwed up her face. "It's… certainly a look."

Agent 3 looked away, blushing madly under the bandana. Jerks. She grabbed the edges of the cape and pulled it tight against her body. "Shut up! It's cool!"

Agent 2 managed to calm down, somewhat. "Sorry. It's just. Wow. Thanks, Three, I don't think I've laughed that hard in a while."

"Mar—Agent 2, be nice," Agent 1 said. "It's not that, um. Not that, uh. Not. Hmm."

"Not that what?" Agent 3 asked with a soul-piercing glare.

Agent 1 sighed. "Look, sorry, it's a cool getup for the mysterious Agent 3, just not for, you know."

"Just not for Keri Avony the awkward broody teenager," Agent 2 finished.

"Yeah, what she said."

"You guys are asses, you know that?"

Two laughed. Cackled. "Yeah."

"Oop, hold on, time for professionalism," Agent 1 said, looking off into the distance.

Two figures were approaching in the distance, with an almost comical height difference between them. The three agents shut up and straightened their postures. Three adjusted her cape so it would blow menacingly in the wind; Two noticed, and snickered, and was an asshole.

Eventually, they would learn to appreciate the cape.

It wasn't long before the figures reached them. The shorter one was a small pink Inkling, wearing a white dress and a big crown on her head. The taller one was the Octoling, wearing what was honestly some pretty skimpy clothes, at least by Inkling standards, with a huge zipper attached to her crop top. She also had a small bag slung around her shoulder. They carried themselves confidently, but not without nervousness; the New Squidbeak Splatoon had to look at least somewhat imposing, dressed as they were, and Agent 3 herself was kind of infamous in Octarian society for, like. Beating literally their entire military, pretty much.

The Octoling's eyes flickered from face to face, her mouth pulled back into an unreadable line. Out of the two of them, it was actually the Inkling who appeared more frightened, judging by the way her hands shook; but she was ever so slightly crouched down, clearly ready to jump into action if anything went wrong.

Well, if she was willing to throw down for the Octoling, then clearly she trusted her. Maybe this wouldn't end awfully for everyone.

"Thanks for coming," Agent 1 said, nodding respectfully to the two of them. "It means a lot."

"You're welcome," the Octoling said. Her eyes flicked to Agent 2. "You two look familiar."

"I was about to say the same thing," said Two. "Aren't you two Off The Hook?"

Agent 3 turned. "That new hipster band?"

"Hi. Yes. I'm Marina, and this is Pearl. And for the record, it's not a hipster band," the Octoling said. "I didn't know this would be a… costume party."

"Standard procedure," Agent 2 replied, poker-faced. "Nothing personal, but it's too risky to let people know what we look like."

"Oh, bullshit," spat the small pink one. Pearl. "You just don't trust her because she's an Octoling!"

Agent 2 shook her head. "Anybody can claim to be anything in electronic communication. Telling us she was an Octoling actually helps us trust you two. If this were actually an ambush, you wouldn't have put us on guard like that. And, for the record, we still would've taken all these security measures."

Pearl didn't seem entirely satisfied, but her voice lost its edge. "Alright. Whatever. I still don't like the whole masks and sunglasses thing."

Agent 1 ignored her, instead turning back to Marina. "Aren't you two getting quite popular? Can't people tell you're an Octoling?"

"I think they think I'm just into experimental fashion," Marina said. "I've even had a few fans try to model their tentacles after mine. It's actually a bit funny."

One nodded. "Right. That's good. I'm not sure Inkopolis would react too well to Octolings just walking around in the open. The Zapfish was only stolen a year ago; it's still pretty fresh in everybody's mind."

Pearl seemed very frustrated. Probably because it all had to be compacted into that tiny little body of hers. "Yeah—but—that—that wasn't Marina!"

"Well, it kind of was," Marina said, looking down guiltily at Pearl. "I mean, I wasn't on the team that stole it, but I was a pretty high-ranking engineer for Octavio. I helped."

"God, Marina, don't tell them that!" Pearl nearly shouted, gesturing wildly at the agents. "Now they're gonna arrest you!"

"We aren't going to arrest you," Agent 2 assured. "Especially not if you're willing to help us, which it seems like you are. You mentioned you had information about the Octarian's plans?"

"Yes!" Marina perked up, and pulled a laptop out of her bag. "As I said, I was a pretty high-ranking engineer, so I was involved in a lot of operations headed by the DJ. After he was captured, the next people in charge were already planning how to rescue him, but they didn't count on the Squid Sisters' song breaking us out of the hypnosis they were using on us Octolings. One of my closest friends in the Underground, Syra, planned this whole escape plan with a bunch of us. A few months back, when they were planning to attack Inkopolis and free DJ Octavio, we sabotaged a few projects. They… Well, they exploded, basically, and we used the chaos to escape."

Agent 3 frowned. "So… did all these other Octolings just not come to Inkopolis, or…?"

"Or," Marina answered, face lowered. "They cut us off and had us surrounded before we could make it out. Most of us were captured, but a few of us managed to escape. Syra… was killed. They cut power to the lower spawns, and…"

Marina's voice broke a little, and Pearl laid a comforting hand on her back.

"I'm so sorry," Agent 1 said, hand over her mouth. Agent 2 was silent, but her eyes looked a bit more somber than usual.

"It's okay. That's just how the Octarian's are. They treat us like garbage because we remind them of Inklings. Always have; it just took that song for us to notice."

Pearl took Marina's hand in hers and squeezed, and the two of them shared a meaningful glance. It seemed to help Marina calm down, and they smiled warmly at one another.

Oh. Okay. So that explained a lot, actually.

"You must've escaped months ago, though," Agent 2 said, interrupting the moment. Classic Two. "Why haven't they gone through with their plan yet? All they've been doing is stealing the occasional zapfish."

"We blew up a ton of stuff down there during the escape," Marina said. "The Underground was practically collapsing. I'd imagine they're still trying to rebuild everything. But that's why I wanted to talk to you—they're probably going to attack sometime soon. And they're super angry about what happened last year. Especially at you." She pointed at Three, meeting her eye.

"Yeah, that's understandable. I can imagine how they feel," Agent 3 said.

"I'm not sure you can," Marina said. "Do you realize that you're effectively the face of anti-Inkling propaganda? Anybody with a shred of sense in the Underground would sell their soul to capture you. It would make them a hero in an instant—goodbye rationed meal cubes, goodbye cramped military dorms, hello status and what little luxury they have down there."

Three crossed her arms. "Well, I'm flattered, but if they couldn't manage to stop me when I was literally running around in their headquarters, I kind of doubt they'd manage it now."

Marina shrugged. "Maybe. Just know that they're out for blood."

Next to her, Agent 2 let out a humming sound. "I wonder if we should hire another agent."

"Like who?" Agent 1 asked.

Agent 2 shrugged. "Who knows. Might fuck around and sit in a sewer grate until someone walks up to me. Worked with Agent 3."

Agent 3 felt like she should contest that, but it was just the truth.

"Excuse me?" Marina asked. "Are you saying that the Inkling who single handedly brought down DJ Octavio and his army was just… picked up off the street?"

"Yeah," said Three. "Pretty much."

Marina looked at Pearl. "Explain."

Pearl scratched her head. "I dunno if I can, Mari. Uh. Pretty much every Inkling in Inkopolis has been fighting since they were fourteen, though, so it's not too ridiculous?"

"Those were trained soldiers, Pearl."

"We're getting off topic," Agent 3 said, because this was very quickly approaching the 'Hey, Keri, why are you so scary good at fighting?' line of thought, and she was very much not about that. Especially not with One and Two right here. "Is there anything else you have to tell us?"

Marina thought for a moment. "I think that's it. I have a few friends I keep in discreet contact with, so I'll keep you up to date on everything. Oh! There is one more thing!"

Agent 2 raised an eyebrow. "Go on."

"Buy our album!"

"Goddammit," said Agent 3.

"Haha, yeah!" Pearl said, jumping up and high-fiving Marina. "Did ya know we're the fastest-growing band in Inkopolis? Because we are! Pretty soon, we'll be telling those overrated Squid Sisters to shove it, 'cause the top spot's got our name on it!"

Agent 2 took a menacing step forward. "Excuse me? What was that about the Squid Sisters?"

"Ha-HA! Okay!" Agent 1 said quickly, grabbing her cousin by the shoulder and drawing her back in. "We'll keep in touch. See ya later! Staaaaaay fresh!"

There was a beat of silence as everybody processed what she'd just said, and then chaos. Agent 3 face palmed, Agent 1 slapped her hands over her mouth, Pearl pointed at Agent 1 with a shocked expression, Marina gasped dramatically as her hand shot to her heart, and Agent 2 let out the most pained, hopeless, strangled sound that Three had ever heard.

"I want to die," said Two. "No, scratch that. I want you to die."

"You didn't hear anything! I mean!" Agent 1 waved her arms frantically. "I'm a really big fan of the Squid Sisters so I just like saying that! That's a normal thing people do, right?"

"Oh my god, I just called the Squid Sisters overrated to their faces," Pearl whimpered, looking like she was about to have a panic attack.

"This is why it's important to separate personal and professional life, Agent 1!" berated Three. She was literally Agent 1! She had started the whole thing! Secret identities had been her idea! What the hell! "Come on!"

"Oh my, oh wow, it's really you! I knew you looked familiar!" Marina said, beginning to freak out. "Can I have your autograph? Please? Oh, and that must mean your Marie, right?"

"Kill me," muttered Agent 2. "Three, you brought your gun, right? Please shoot me. I'm too mad to do it myself."

"AAAH, I can't believe it!" Marina continued. "You two changed my life, you know that? Of course you know that, I just told you that, and you were there when it happened in the first place. Wow! This is a dream come true!"

"Alright, meeting officially canceled," Agent 2 said, practically having to push Marina off of her. "Thanks for coming. Your contribution to the safety and security of Inkopolis will not go unrecognized. You have done a great service today, and you should be proud. All that jazz. Two, out."

With that, Two whipped out her charger, fired a line of ink all the way to the grate, and swam off.

"Wait, Mar—Agent 2! Don't leave me!" One called.

"This is your fault! You deal with it!" came Agent 2's response. She hopped through the grate and disappeared.

"Yeah, she's right," said Three with a shrug. "Later, One."

"Wait! No!"

The last thing Agent 3 heard before she left for Inkopolis was Marina: "So, about that autograph…"