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Chapter 15
" And it feels like, it's the first time
That anybody's ever brought the sun without the rain"
~ Say It Again by Marie Digby
Jane was late. Her body, sore. And she didn't get much sleep last night. But despite that, she still entered the bullpen with so much enthusiasm and energy. Korsak has to take a double look at her before he fixed his eyes on his partner while Frankie, who was standing beside Korsak was clearly amused at the sight. Something must have happened last night.
"You're late, Jane," Korsak commented.
"Good morning to you, too, Korsak and," Jane looked up. "Frankie. Sorry, I had a late night talk last night." She sat on her desk and started working on their latest case, not offering any more information to them.
"Have you had your morning coffee, yet?" Frankie asked.
"No. I haven't even had my breakfast, yet. Why?"
"Well, that was unusual. You're grumpy when you don't have coffee in the morning and will be for the rest of the day." Jane just hummed as a response. Korsak and Frankie looked at each other, clearly amused at Jane's behavior. They both shrugged.
A little while after, a sound of clicking of the heels against the tiled floor was heard inside the bullpen. They are all aware to whom those footsteps belong to. Jane didn't look up, her head was still buried on the screen of her computer but a smile is already plastered on her face.
"Good morning, Sergeant, Frankie," Maura greeted the two men with a smile on her face while holding a cup of coffee.
Still stunned by the turn of events, especially Frankie, the two looked at the doctor approaching.
"Good morning, Dr. Isles," Korsak greeted.
"Hey, Maura." Frankie nodded.
Maura walked towards Jane's desk as she placed the cup in front of the other woman's face like she always does these past few days. Jane looked up and met Maura's gaze. Both smiling. Neither wavering. And it seems like nothing matters to them that moment.
"I brought you coffee." Maura finally spoke.
"I can see, that." Jane took the cup and took her first sip. It's bitter and hot. Burning her throat. But it was worth it. It soothed her. And it left a wonderful taste after the bitterness. Just like what happened to her life these past few months. She struggled but she conquered afterwards.
"Thank you for this, Maur."
"It's my pleasure. By the way, will you come down to my office this lunch? Your mother made me bring all the leftovers at last night's dinner. And I figured you wouldn't want to talk to your mom today so..."
Jane smiled widely at Maura. "I'll come down to your office."
Maura returned the smile. "Okay. I'll see you later."
After saying her goodbyes to Korsak and Frankie, Maura headed out of the bullpen as Jane followed her with her gaze, still smiling like a fool. The two men witnessed all the exchange and noticed the change in the two women's behavior. When Jane finally looked at the two, she was met with warm, understanding, and comforting smile. They nodded in approval. No words needed for them to know.
"Okay, not here to ruin your mood but I got a call. They found Patrick Sullivan's car." Korsak said while getting up in his chair.
Jane got up as well, grabbing the cup of coffee and her blazer, she followed Korsak towards the elevator. Frankie was left in the station. "Where?"
"Behind the warehouse at Charlestown."
"Let's get to it."
They didn't expect it.
When Korsak informed Jane that the patrol police found the car, they expected it to be vacant. They didn't expect to have a lifeless body in it. And that body belonged to Peter James, Patrick's best friend, and Lily's real father. Jane turned away from the car, clearly frustrated and angry about the new situation. Peter could help them locate the Sullivans. But now? Everything seemed like it turned to dust.
Korsak put a hand on Jane's shoulder. "What does it look like?"
"Gunshot wound to the head. I'll call Maura and CSRU," Korsak offered.
"Okay." Frustratingly, Jane raked her hands on her wild mane.
This shouldn't happen. She didn't see this thing coming. Peter could be a key to her finding Patrick Sullivan. But now he's dead. The one person that could lead them to killer ended up dead. But who did it? Could it be Patrick that killed him? Or could it be someone else? Well, she wouldn't know until Maura compared the bullet in Peter's head to Lily's bullet. Then another thought came to her mind. If this is Patrick Sullivan's doing, it could mean that Michael Hanson could be in danger, too. And she must keep him safe like the way she promised Dinah. She must keep him safe. Sighing, she leaned on the back of the car waiting for Maura and the team to process the crime scene.
It was unusual for Maura for Jane not hovering around like the way she used to when the doctor is examining the body. But she let it go for the time being so she can concentrate and do her work. Korsak stood beside her, watching her do her work.
"Time of death is about ten hours ago," Maura confirmed.
"So, he died last night."
"Yes. I'll give you the details once I'm done with the autopsy," Maura said as she stood up. She glanced at Jane and found the detective looking down. The brunette looks like in deep thought. "Is she okay?"
Korsak looked at what Maura's looking then shrugged. "She must be pretty shaken." Maura looked at Korsak, eyes questioning, waiting for more information. Korsak understood. "This man is Peter James, the father of the dead girl. Jane thought that Peter could be a key to finding the Sullivans."
"That must be really hard for her."
"Hey, doc. Since you're here already, can you drive Jane back to the station? I think she needs you." Korsak smiled in a comfortingly way in which Maura returned.
"It's not a problem Sergeant."
Korsak nodded. "I'll see you both back in the station." And with that, he left.
Sighing, Maura removed her gloves as she walked towards the detective who is still in deep thought. Once in front of Jane, Maura put a comforting hand on Jane's shoulder. Jane looked up and gave Maura a small, tired smile.
"Are you okay?" Maura asked, concern visible in her eyes.
Jane nodded and put a hand on Maura's hand on her shoulder, squeezing it lightly before dropping them and intertwining their fingers together. "Can I ask you a favor?"
"Anything."
"Can you drive me to Boston Common? I need to see Dinah and Michael."
Maura knew what Jane is asking so she nodded immediately, guiding Jane to her car hand in hand.
They found Dinah in the alleyway near Boston Common talking to some people. Other people like her. Street people. But they couldn't find Michael. The teenager wasn't with her. When Dinah spotted Maura and Jane not so far from her, she excused herself to her companions and approached the two younger women.
"Detective, doctor, what can I do for you?"
"Oh, we're just checking on you? How's Michael?" Jane asked casually, trying to hide the worry in her voice.
But Dinah wasn't one to fool, she immediately caught on Jane's question. "Is there a problem, Detective? Should I be worried about him?"
"Oh, no no no, Dinah. I'm just checking on you both. I just wanted to know how are you both after the questioning."
Dinah relaxed, eyes softened. "Oh, we're doing fine. Michael told me, he'll stay in contact if you need him. Every night he comes around and stays with me."
Jane smiled at that. "That's good."
"Oh and Dinah, may I check on your wound? I think it's time to remove the stitches." Maura chimed in. Dinah turned to Maura as she smiled and nodded.
"Okay, I'll get us something to eat and drink and Maura will do her job on your stitches," Jane said and excused herself.
"Shall we go to Boston Common so we could sit?" Maura turned to Dinah.
"Lead the way, doctor."
As soon as Maura and Dinah were sat on one of the benches in Boston Common, Maura worked on her work by removing the stitches gently. Once again, Dinah watched the doctor in awe.
"Hmm, I think you were doing a good job by taking care of your stitches these past few days," Maura commented.
"I sometimes listen to doctors," Dinah replied. And Maura just smiled at her. "Is Detective Jane okay? She looks agitated."
Maura stiffened at the question. She doesn't actually know how Jane is coping up with the new obstacle in their case. "She's fine. She's just frustrated with the case she's working on. I mean, we're working on."
"Oh. The dead kid?"
"Yeah. Whenever we get a case involving a kid, it always gets on her nerves."
There was silence between the two of them. Maura was working gently on the stitches while Dinah watched her with a smile on her face. After all the years she spent in the streets, Dinah could tell whether a person is good or bad.
"You're a good doctor. And a good person." Dinah was the first to break the silence.
"Thank you. No one ever said that to me before." Maura whispered the last part.
"You mean, no of your patients before told you that?"
Maura looked back up at her then shook her head. "I actually deal every day with dead people. I bet Jane told you that already? I'm a medical examiner. I speak for dead people. And I prefer it that way. Not that I didn't treat live patients before. I actually did a couple of times but I still prefer dead people. Don't get me wrong. I just don't know how to deal with live people."
Dinah frowned, not understanding what Maura meant. "What do you mean?"
Maura sighed. She didn't really want to relive her lonely life as a child but since she already hinted at it, she decided to tell Dinah about almost everything. And she finds the old lady to be comforting in some ways.
"I was an awkward person when I was growing up," Maura began. "I didn't have friends when I was a kid and I used to be alone all the time. I was an outcast because I was different with the other kids of my own age. I stopped minding and making friends when I entered adolescence. And my life went on that way through adulthood until I met Jane, the rest of the Rizzolis and the other detectives I used to work with. They changed me. Jane changed me. And I found myself doing things I never did before. And I learned how to interact with other people because of her though from time to time I still find myself feeling awkward with other people." Maura finished, smiling.
Dinah just looked at her for a moment until Maura was finished removing the stitches in the other woman's wound. "Detective Rizzoli must be a good person. I can sense she has this ability to take over people's lives. I meant it in a good way, by the way. She's like a vortex that sucks you in and one day you'll find you're already a different person. She has a positive effect on people."
Maura smiled widely at her companion. What she said was how exactly the way she would describe Jane. "That she is."
Jane and Dinah sat side by side on the bench while Maura took a call. Right after, Maura removed the stitches on Dinah's wound, Jane returned with food in hand, obviously for Dinah. They chatted for awhile until Maura's phone rang and excused herself to take it.
Jane was still frazzled by the death of the only person that could help them the whereabouts of the Sullivans. But just by looking at her best friend, Jane calms and everything that's bugging her seemed to get away. Everything between her and Maura is still new. It is quite terrifying, yet thrilling. She doesn't know how she'll handle it. She's actually not sure how she'll handle it. But there's one thing she knows for sure. Jane is ready to go through everything as long as Maura is with her.
"Did it happen to you like one day you're looking at something this way then one day, you were looking at it in a completely different way?" Jane asked when silence fell over her and Dinah, her eyes fixed on the doctor.
Dinah looked up at her and studied her for a moment then she turned her gaze to wherever Jane is looking at. She understood immediately and smiled. "Do you believe in soulmate, detective?"
Jane snapped her head back to the woman beside her from the question. She frowned. "What? Just like in the movies where you get to be with someone you're destined to?"
Dinah chuckled. "Not quite like that. But it could be one example."
Jane's frown deepened. "Are you going to be cryptic again?"
The woman raised an eyebrow with a smirk on her face. "Try again."
Jane nearly rolled her eyes like she always does but answered instead. "Isn't soulmate what we call in real life when you get to be together with someone you really love in the end?" Dinah slowly shook her head and stared at Jane like she has grown three heads that moment. "What?"
"Well, I thought you can do better when I said try again." Dinah shrugged.
"Well, maybe you can explain it to me then?"
"It could be someone. Anyone. Somebody. But it doesn't have to be the love of your life."
Jane's frown deepened more if it's even possible. "How is that possible? Shouldn't it be the one you get to fall in love with?"
Dinah shook her head firmly. "Soulmate is more powerful than the person you get to fall in love with. A soulmate is someone you connected to. Someone you bonded with. Someone that you cannot get out of your life no matter how hard you try to push them away. They will always come back. Because they are meant to be in your life. It could be found platonically or romantically. And the person you get to fall in love with? You can fall out of that either."
"It could be someone?" Jane asked dumbly as if Dinah didn't mention it before.
"Yes. It could be your best friend, your mother, cousin, and the list will go on. It could be someone. But you know what's the most beautiful thing out of it?"
"What?" And Jane was once again enthralled with Dinah.
"If the love of your life and your best friend and your soulmate is just the same person."
And Jane didn't get to respond to that. She's processing everything what Dinah had just said. And while she's doing it, her eyes are fixated on Maura. Everything that Dinah described, everything she said is the exact description she could say about Maura. Maura isn't her mother, nor cousin, bor brother. She's definitely her best friend. But is she the love of her life? She couldn't say because she's still figuring that out. She loves her though. Yes. She does. Could she be her soulmate? Definitely, she could be. Maura's the only one she has a strong connection with. The only person she bonded with easily. Definitely, she can be her soulmate.
A smile was formed on her lips when her thoughts ended. It is funny when you keep looking everywhere for someone you wanted to spend your life with when that person is right there all along with you the whole time.
"I assume you already found your soulmate?"
"I think I did." Jane's smile never left her face.
"Good to know."
The bullet they got out of Peter is a matched from the bullet they got from Lily. The same gun was fired through Peter's head. After they went to Boston Common to see Dinah, they came back to the station, had a quick lunch in Maura's office, and went on with their work. Jane stayed for a little while to watch Maura do the autopsy. She stayed quiet for most of the doctor's examination which was a little disturbing for Maura. But since she knew how Jane was upset with the turn events, she let her instead and made a mental note to talk to Jane later after work.
The autopsy took most of Maura's afternoon. That's why when it turns six in the evening, Jane found herself alone in the Dirty Robber, nursing her second beer. Her alone time was cut short when her mother sat across her.
"Hey, Ma," Jane greeted her mother.
"Where's Maura? Why are you alone?"
"She's staying late at work I guess."
Angela nodded as she studied her daughter who is looking tired and forlorn. "Are you okay, honey?"
"Huh? Yeah, I'm fine."
"You seem tired."
"Don't I always?" She snapped. "Sorry. The case I'm working on just gotten worse."
"I see. It's the dead kid, right? The one you're currently working on."
"Yeah. And I don't want to talk about it. If that's okay?" She looked at her mother pleadingly.
"Okay." Angela nodded. "Hey, remember the last time we were here?"
Jane smiled then chuckled as her memory with her mother the last time they were here flashed in her mind. "We had a drink that night."
"Yeah. We did. And you confessed something." Angela whispered the last part.
"Yes. I did." Jane admitted. Angela was a little surprised when Jane acknowledged it. "So, you want to have a drink with me so you can have me confess again?"
Angela shook her head vigorously. "No. I just wanted to know if you and Maura are okay after you know. Yesterday."
Jane's breath caught. Of course, she knew what her mother is talking about. The marriage proposal of Jack Armstrong that gone off bad. The one Maura did not accept. The one Maura rejected and chose Jane in the end. Yes, she's so aware of it.
"We talked." That's the only thing that Jane could let out as a reply. "Did Maura tell you about her decision?" Angela shook her head in response. "Then I think you have to wait for her to tell you."
Angela sighed. "I'm not dumb, Jane. I already know what her decision is. They talked. You talked. I'm pretty aware of what happened after."
"Nice work, then, Sherlock Holmes."
"Jane..."
"Ma, we don't know what's going on. We're still figuring things out whatever there is to figure out. That's the only thing I can tell you for now." Jane let out a heavy sigh. "But I know I won't run away from her. No. We'll get this over together."
"Good. I'm glad."
"Ma. Did you just hear me? I mean I think I just said that there's something going on between Maura and I that's beyond friendship. Something that our church doesn't approve of. You know, there could be romantic feelings between us."
"Oh. I am aware, yes."
"And that's okay with you?" Jane raised an eyebrow.
"You don't give me enough credit, Jane, do you? First of all, yes I know that our church doesn't approve of the same-sex relationship. But it doesn't mean I have to believe in every word they say. I have my own mind. I have the privilege of believing in my own beliefs. The teaching, sermons are guides for us to have a better life in the future. Second, I know Maura makes you happy. And if she makes you happy and you two wanted to be together, who am I to stop that? And if you two end up together, I'll die happy and peaceful knowing that my baby girl is in good hands. And lastly, I've already readied myself that one day, you'll come to me and say that you wanted to have a wife rather than a husband."
"What do you mean, Ma? Are you saying that since before you already thought of me as gay or lesbian? Is that because how I dress and move?" Jane's voice rose.
"No. Not like that, Jane. Do you remember your best friend before, Emily? You two get along seemed fine. Everybody teased you as a couple but you denied it. And I know it's true. Then Maura came along. You bonded so well, too. But there's a difference between her and Emily. It's not the way you dress or move. It's the way how you look at her and the way you acted towards her. Those lingering looks you have for each other, I know one day it could blossom into something more. And I'm not opposed to it, Jane."
Jane's heart swelled at what her mother said. She knows her mother isn't narrow minded like the other people but she never came to the conclusion that her mother could be this open. Maybe it's true that she didn't give her mother enough credits.
Jane looked down at the bottle on top of the table. "Thank you, Ma."
"Now, I want to ask. Why do you look like your dog just died?"
"Because I think I may have ruined Maura's life."
Angela frowned. "Why do you think that?"
"Because she chose me over Jack. She gave up a better life to have a bad one."
"Jane Rizzoli. Life with you isn't bad. Why are you saying this?"
"We both know that my life as a cop is full of dangers."
"I'm aware of that. And I think Maura is aware of that, too." When Jane didn't respond, Anela continued. "Are you saying that you think Maura dumped Jack for you? Didn't you think that maybe Maura wanted to be with you? We know Maura. She's very rational. And she won't make a decision that she hadn't thought of for at least thrice."
"But I have nothing to offer to her, Ma. I'm not rich like the other guys she dated before."
Angela gasped. "Do you think that matters to Maura? Money?"
"No! I mean. Look at me. Look at her. We're so different."
"And she doesn't care. You listen to me Jane Clementine Rizzoli. You may not be rich like the other guys she dated once but you gave her the most important things in her life. You may not be rich but you are loyal, faithful, protective, and loving. Some qualities she didn't see in them. She sees something in you that she failed to see in them that's why she chose you. And you better stop talking that way. That you shouldn't date her because you're not rich. No. You're not only selling yourself short but you're also making Maura cheap. That she only dates for money. She's not like that and you know it."
Jane didn't get to react immediately after Angela's long speech. She was stunned. "Who are you and what you did to my mom?"
Angela stood up as she chuckled. "You better go. Your drinks are on the house tonight, young lady."
"Really? Might as well I take advantage of it."
"No. Just two beers. You go now."
That's Angela actually telling her to go and see Maura. Jane just smiled.
Before Angela walked Maura, she turned back to Jane and said, "Honey, always remember that sometimes true love comes in a form you least expect it but rest assured that it's worth having for."
Maura just arrived a couple minutes ago when there was a knock on the door. Still, in her dress and heels she wore to the office that morning, Maura walked towards the door and opened it. There, Jane stood, looking down as she rubbed her hands together.
Jane looked up and smiled as she saw Maura. "Hi."
"Jane," Maura smiled back. "Come in." She stepped aside and let Jane in.
Once the door was locked again, Jane spun around and pulled Maura into a hug. The doctor was taken aback by what Jane did. But she welcomed the embrace almost immediately and smiled against the detective's chest. Jane rested her chin on top of Maura's head as she pulled the doctor tighter. They stayed that way for a long while. They do really fit each other. The hug felt so perfect. So warm. And they could really get used to that.
Maura pulled away a little, not entirely breaking the embrace and looked up to see Jane. "What is this for, Jane?"
"This is me Detective Jane Rizzoli wanted to ask permission if I could spend the night with you."
And Maura's smile couldn't get any brighter.