The Progeny Chapter 3 I Watch For Her
A/N Thank you for taking the time to read my little A/U sci-fi story. Your comments and suggestions are welcomed and appreciated.
It was the Day of Remembrance. An annual day of reflection set aside to recall the day the people learned their world was destined to end and the day the people resolved to put a plan in motion to save their species and begin life anew on another world. Fitz, Mellie and their families had just returned from unity affirmation services and everyone was gathering at the Grant home for the common meal. The table was set with fine linen, flowers and other tangible elements of the planet. There were traditional foods from the four sectors and lots of wine. Everything on the table had a purpose. Everything on the table was symbolic of what was special and unique about their planet and its' people. The table spoke to the future as well as the past. This world may be ending but the people will go on. They will survive and carry what is best from this current world into the next.
The men wore the traditional gray tunic with a single red strip on one arm and a single black stripe on the other and gray pants. Red symbolized all the bloodshed from years of war and black, the darkness of hate that fostered war and threatened to destroy their very existence. The women were in verdant green empire waist, off the shoulder gowns. The rich green color and gossamer fabric symbolized the freedom and strength found in purposeful change, the promise, and the beauty of new life birthed in hope.
Unlike previous cycles, the mood at the table was festive but somewhat subdued almost somber at times. The absence of the normal celebratory tone of the gathering did not go unnoticed by all in attendance. There was tension in the air but no one knew the original of it. Both sets of parents noticed Fitz and Mellie sat across from each other rather than next to one another. They also noticed Fitz and Mellie seemed distant. Sabean, Fitz's mother, asked the couple if everything was okay. Both replied in unison that everything was fine.
But everything was not fine. Fitz's mind was elsewhere. He longed for this day to end. The sooner this day ended the sooner tomorrow would arrive and he could see Olivia again. He needed to tell her how he felt. He needed to touch her, to hear her voice, to fill his lungs with her scent. He needed her. He wanted her. He knew his life was nothing without her.
Once the meal ended and the guests left, Fitz and Mellie's parents moved to one corner of the common room to engage in a rather animated discussion. Their pointed glances, shaking heads and periodic nods all targeted Fitz and Mellie. Both Fitz and Mellie knew the discussion had something to do with them. Mellie whispered in Fitz's ear and motioned toward the outside deck. They both thought it best to make a hasty retreat before their parents roped them into their heated conversation.
Once Fitz was out on the deck, his mind became consumed with thoughts of Olivia. He stared at the rippling waves brushing rhythmically against the lakeshore. For a moment, he forgot Mellie was even there.
"I saw talking to Olivia the other day after the broadcast. Is there new information the consortium needs to be briefed on?" She asked trying to segue into a deeper exchange.
"What? I'm sorry Mellie. Did you say something?" Fitz asked sounding caught off guard.
"Are you alright? You seem a little preoccupied. Is there anything I can do?"
"No Mellie, really I'm fine. I do think we need to talk."
Mellie sighs in relief. "I think we need to talk also. Great minds think alike."
Before Fitz can respond, Mellie surges forward, grabs his hands and softly pecks him on the check.
"Fitz, what have you to say of our understanding?" Mellie asked abruptly.
Fitz takes a step back then releases his hands from Mellie's grip.
"What do you mean? Our understanding", Fitz says with a puzzled look on his face.
"Fitz we have kept company for more than six cycles. You were elected doyen more than three cycles ago. Why have you not asked me to speak the vow?"
"Mellie what have I ever said or done to make you believe that I would ask you to speak the vow to me? Be honest. Have I not made it clear that we are just friends and that we will never be anything other than friends."
"Fitz you know our families have been waiting for us to speak the commitment vows and plan our bonding ceremony. Our families have pretty much pledged us to each other. I have not sought or accepted the company of any other man in all our years together. I have been patient but I will be no longer. I will speak the vow to you and you will speak the vow back to me," she said adamantly.
Fitz stared back at Mellie with a look of surprise that quickly faded to one pity and sadness. In that moment, Fitz began to question whether he had truly made his position clear to Mellie. Had he lead her on? Had he sent mixed signals that gave her hope for something more?
"Mellie, will you humor me and answer a few questions." Fitz said tenderly.
"What? You want to quiz me. Are you serious? What is there to question?" Mellie said incredulously. Her breathing was becoming rapid and her body was tensing up. She thought to herself, even now, seeing that I am upset, he still refuses to touch me. Why will he not reach out to hold me? Why will he not try to calm me? Does he loathe me? "Ask your questions," she blurted out.
"Mellie, I do care about you, but not in the way a man cares for a mate. Have I ever asked you to accompany me to an event or outing. Have I ever touched you in a manner that could be considered anything other than friendly? Have I ever looked at you in a way that let you know I wanted to be more than your friend? Have I ever taken you anywhere where it was just the two of us? Have I ever talked to you about speaking the vow?"
"Fitz, are you alright? Has something happened to you that is affecting you memory? Of course you have asked me to accompany you events and outings." Mellie, now genuinely concerned Fitz may be ill.
"Are you sure? Think Mellie, every event or outing we have ever taken has been arranged by our parents or planned by our group of friends. I've never asked you directly for a date."
"Fitz you invited me to your doyen installation ceremony. Did you forget that?"
"No, and if you recall we were with a group of friends and I asked everyone to attend the installation."
'No Fitz, this cannot be! The trip to Furud Falls?"
"My mother."
"The Suhail Festival?"
"Your father. All three years".
"Evening meals?"
"My sister, then your mother."
He could see in her eyes the realization that the answers to all of his questions were no.
"Fitz, last cycle when my grand-matriarch died, you came to my home and held me for hours. You looked into my eyes and told me you would be there for me. You came every day for weeks to check on me. Was that not an act of love?" Mellie now on the brink of tears.
"Mellie, I care for you and love you as a friend. I came to support you and your family in your time of loss. Your grand-matriarch was a great woman. Fitz bowed his head and said 'may she be at peace amongst the ancestors".
Mellie's mind was reeling. It was true. He had been honest with her. He had never made any romantic overtures to her. Mellie's Her epiphany hit her hard both emotionally and physically. She thought, I have been a spectator in my own life. Was it pride that made me stay with Fitz? Was it fear? How did I allow myself to waste six cycles of my life on a man who only wanted to be my friend. Mellie looked at Fitz as though it was her first time ever seeing him. She grabbed his left hand squeezed it for a moment, then she placed her other hand over her mouth, shook her head and rushed off the deck back into the house.
Fitz remained on the deck looking out over the lake. Lost in his thoughts, Fitz did not notice his father was standing next to him. Both father and son stood gripping the deck railing staring at the waves. Fitz' father was an imposing figure. He stood comparable in height and musculature to Fitz but the affect of time clearly left marks on his face and hands. He placed his left hand on Fitz's right shoulder and gently turned Fitz so that he was facing him. Fitz managed a slight smile, then resumed looking at the lake. He knew why his father had come out on the deck and really had no desire to rehash his discussion with Mellie.
His father cleared his throat and began to speak. "Son Mellie just told us that you have no intention of asking her to speak the vow of commitment. Is this true?"
"Yes father, it is true", Fitz answered as he turned again to face his father.
"Son, you and Mellie have been together for six cycles. You're a doyen now and it is time for you to choose a mate. Mellie is a perfect match for you. Why do you have doubts?"
"I do not care for her as a man should care for a mate. She is my friend and nothing more."
"How long have you felt this way? Why haven't you said anything before now? Our families are invested in this relationship. We want you two to work things out."
"Father, have any of you ever thought to ask me or Mellie what we want? Mellie is beautiful and a wonderful person, but she is not the person for me. I have always made this clear to her and the families. Why is this such a shock to you all?"
"Son, you can grow to love her. Not all bondings are love based. Sharing common interests and goals is more than enough to build a life together. You need to follow through with your initial intentions. You need to commit to Mellie."
"Father I respect you as patriarch and always will, but I will not bond with Mellie. I have never intended to or expressed any desire to bond with her and I never will. The sooner everyone accepts this fact the better. Mellie is and has always been free to find a mate."
"Fitz, son", his father grabs his arm and looks him straight in the eyes. "We have chosen you, there is no other."
"Therein lays the problem father. Bonding is not about the we, it is about the us and there is no us.
"Fitz! Gerry shouted." His father was becoming increasingly agitated perceiving Fitz was determined to be defiant on this matter.
"Father the vows mean something to me. I will not speak them because of familiarity or obligation to others. I want to love my mate, as a man should. I want to be lost in my mate's eyes. I want to crave my mate's touch. I want my first thought every morning to be about my mate and our family. When I lay down at night I want the person I love next to me. I want love not an arrangement. A mate should complete me. She should fill in the gaps in my life I did not know existed.
"Son, how do you know Mellie is not that person? You just admitted your mate will complete areas of your life you have no idea are missing."
"Every time I look at Mellie I see myself alone. I see myself unhappy, longing for something more. This should not be. I will not do that to her." Fitz replies almost pleading.
"Son, you will grow to love her."
"No father, I will grow indifferent towards her. I will resent her in the end and she me. Mellie deserves so much more than I can give her."
Fitz places his hands on his father's arms and looks his father in the eyes. "Our people stand on the brink of extinction. The days ahead will present the greatest challenges our people will ever know. Every bonding from this point on needs to be based in love. These final cycles will be frightening and difficult. The people need to be more united than ever. Strong loving families are what will get our people to the new world. There is no room for regret, missed opportunities or what ifs. It will take generations for our people to reach the new world. Those who survive to build our new society must be the, exceptional, emotionally complete. They must embody the best of us if our culture, our identity, our very essence as a people is to remain intact."
"Son, is there someone you desire to speak the vow to?"
"Yes, there is". However, before Fitz can speak another word he grabs his head, screams in pain and collapses.
"Fitz, Fitz, look at me, Gerry screams. Sabean help me!"