"I don't want to bother you," he said. "I'll just leave this, in case you get hungry." He stepped in and put the plate on her dresser. He turned to leave but paused hesitantly. "Can I... I mean, are you, can I stay a minute?"
"I wish you would," Raven said, lowering herself to the ground and going to get the food. It brought her very close to him and she found that making eye contact made her feel flustered and nervous, in a good way, and she stepped quickly away. "What have you been doing?"
He shrugged. "The usual. Showing Cyborg a few things in the lab, letting Robin have a few sparring tips, fighting off my adoring fans." Raven gave a ghost of a smile. "How are you doing?"
"To tell the truth, I'm fine," she said. She sat on her bed with her meal. Following a sudden impulse she said, "Sit with me." To her own ears it sounded forced and uncomfortable and she winced inwardly. It was not how she meant it. Without batting an eye, Beast Boy sat at the foot of the bed, indian style. "I've been thinking," she said.
"What about?"
"I have decided to magnanimously allow you to call me "Rae" for short," she said.
"I was going to do it anyway," he replied.
"That's part of the reason I'm being magnanimous," she said. "I have also decided that I don't like calling you Beast Boy. It seems, well, impersonal. Raven is actually my name, after all."
"My name sucks," he said shortly.
"Garfield is a bit... old fashioned, I suppose."
"Yeah, it is," he said. Then, after a seconds thought, he went on. "You can call me anything you want."
"I'll think about it."
"So," he said a bit hesitantly, "has that been what kept you up here all day?" She shook her head. "Been a busy few days." She nodded this time. He paused. She ate. "So, you're fine?"
"I really kind of am," she said. "Who cares what stupid people say? The hell with their opinions. We will go and do exactly as we like and they can say whatever they want." She smiled cynically. "And when they're in danger, we'll step in and save them anyway."
"I'm with you, baby," he said.
She actually stopped with a spoon halfway to her mouth. "We talked about you never, ever calling me that."
"You did all the talking on that subject," he replied. "What happened to you being magnanimous?"
"I'm done," she said. "I've been working through a few other things too."
"Anything you want to share?"
She sighed. "Nothing really worth talking about."
"OK," he said.
"It's not that I don't want to talk to you," she said quickly.
"And you don't have to. I won't get mad or anything."
"No!" she protested, "it's just that I can't really consider my situation until after I see the doctor and Cyborg does whatever it is he's going to do, so I just have to let it go for now. I'll worry about it when I know what I actually have to worry about."
"You're a smart chick," he said.
"Thanks," she said dryly.
"Smart chicks are hot," he went on.
She colored slightly. "Stop it."
He grinned. "OK." His demeanor clearly indicated his amusement.
"As of now, 'chick' and 'baby' are strictly off limits."
He nodded agreement. "Look, I should tell you that everyone is, well, I guess we've all been more upset then you are. Cy's been really quiet and Robin has been taking it out on the heavy bag all day."
"Really?" she asked, touched. Even though it happened fairly often, caring from her friends always caught her by surprise. "Beast Boy nodded. "What about Star?"
"She doesn't know," he said. "She knows somethings up but it's been... tense today. I think she's afraid to ask."
"You've all been more upset by this then I have," she said.
"We're guys," he said. "This is the great unknown for us. We have no idea about... anything about it."
"What makes you think I do?"
"You've got the plumbing," he said. "I guess I just assumed that came with..."
"A detailed understanding of the emotional aspects of childbearing? It doesn't."
"But it does come with an inherent knowledge of what colors go together and stuff like that, right?" She gave him a look. "It doesn't? My illusions... shattered!"
"It's probably for the best," she said.
"So," he said, "you're OK with the newspaper thing and you're waiting to deal with the other." She nodded. "Then I can I change the subject?" She looked at him. "What are you doing for the rest of the day?" She shrugged. "Want to do something"
"Like what?"
"You did agree to a second date," he said. "We could do the classic dinner and a movie thing."
"Your taste in both movies and food is suspect," she said.
"Hey!" he said, actually sounding offended. "You pick the movie and I'll pick the restaurant."
"Sounds fair."
"Let me know what you want to see and I'll make reservations."
"Reservations?" she asked.
"Nothing but the best for me and my baby," he said.
"That's about enough of that," she said in annoyance.
-----
Robin was still in the gym, wondering what he was so angry about. The item in the paper was really not a big deal. Let people think what they wanted. It didn't affect them or what they did, at least not much. Bruce would have been very angry to learn he was giving a moment's thought to public opinion. Maybe it was because it had upset Raven. He had a very protective streak for the girls on his team. He hated to see Star's innocence abused or mocked. Especially ever since he had found Raven in another world as a frightened child, he wanted so very much to protect her and see her happy. Beast Boy had better be taking this thing with her seriously.
He was amused at himself for the way he felt protective towards the girls. They were clearly the most powerful members of the team. He wasn't sure which of them was more powerful but he wouldn't want to have to make a living on the difference.
It was just the utter injustice of Raven's situation. It just wasn't fair and there wasn't a damned thing he could do about it. Nothing ate at him more then his own limitations. Cyborg had already come to him and said that the procedures Raven needed would be expensive. He had waved it away. It was a trifling sum to him. He would gladly have paid ten times the cost and more. That at least he could do.
Beast Boy entered the room. "Dude," he said. "You reek. Take a shower."
"A little more time in here wouldn't hurt you," Robin replied.
"Whatever," Beast Boy said. "I got some good news."
"What?"
"Rae is doing good," he said. "In fact, all us fellas have been more freaked out then she is."
"Really?"
"Yeah. It has something to do with plumbing and color co-ordination. I'm not completely clear on the details."
Robin looked curiously at Beast Boy and then shook his head as if to clear it. "But she's doing OK?" Beast Boy nodded. "Good."
"So, we're going out again tonight," Beast Boy said.
"So you two are..." Robins voice trailed off.
"Going out tonight," Beast Boy replied, purposely not telling Robin what he knew was being asked. "I need a favor."
"What?"
"I need to borrow some money," he said hesitantly.
"How much?"
"I'm not sure," Beast Boy admitted. "I want to take her somewhere nice."
Robin nodded. "OK. I can do that, but you're going to have to earn it."
"Dude!" Beast Boy protested. "Aren't we friends? Can't we be men here? Help me out!"
"I'm going to," Robin said, "and in return, you're going to spend an extra hour a day here or on the training course for a month."
"That is so uncool." Robin shrugged. "Two weeks?" Beast boy counter offered. Robin solemnly shook his head no. "This is so wrong. You've got me over a barrel and you're squeezing me?"
"Sure am."
-----
Raven had thought about what Beast Boy had said about Star not knowing exactly what was going on. A moment's consideration had told her the Star would be worried given the way everyone was acting. She went looking for her only female friend and found her on the couch in the common around, sitting alone and looking rather forlorn.
When Star saw Raven coming she smiled at her and looked hopeful. "Greetings friend."
Raven sat next to her. "I hear things have been weird around here lately."
Star nodded. "Everyone has seemed most sad and they will not tell me why. Cyborg has been in his room working and Robin has been in the gymnasium doing the not-talking thing."
Raven sighed. "They've been worried about me and haven't said anything because... I suppose they didn't think it was their place to say anything."
"Then can you tell me?" Star almost wailed. "If you are in difficulty and I do not know, how can I help you?"
Raven explained quickly about everything. Starfire's face fell as she listened. "You may never... be a mother?" she asked in a near whisper.
"Maybe not. We don't know yet. Maybe this is all for nothing."
"I hope so," Star said, sounding distant.
"I hate how this is so... public," Raven said. "Damn Cyborg anyway. He should have come to me and then I could have just... it could have been private like it should be."
"You should not have to experience this alone," Starfire said.
"I wish I could have made that decision."
"What is done, is done," Star said. "You are not alone. Would you not have told us anyway?"
"Maybe. I don't know. Probably."
"Have you talked to... anyone about this?" They both knew what Star meant even though she didn't say Beast Boy's name.
"Yes," Raven said slowly. "It helped."
"That is what is important. You are all right now?" Raven nodded. "Good. If you will excuse me, I must... go." Star stood quickly and left the room. Raven watched her go, wondering what was wrong. Star went quickly to her room and shut the door. She sat on the floor next to her bed, her knees pulled up so that she could wrap her arms around them. She sat silent like that for a time and then lowered her face onto her knees and began to cry.
-----
After a brief alarm in the afternoon that was to help with a large fire rather then an actual fight, Raven and Beast Boy did have their evening out. They went to a very nice restaurant on what Beast Boy considered his hard earned money. They laughed, which was mostly Beast Boy, and held hands and had a wonderful time. The movie she selected was a very serious drama and Beast Boy had the good grace to at least feign interest. A photographer was waiting for them when they came out and at Ravens insistence they actually posed briefly for him. She actually muttered "Let them get a good look," as they walked away.
Walking home rather then flying was pleasant. It felt like they were prolonging the evening. They were at least not the victims of an attempted crime this time. When they got back to the tower, Cyborg was sitting alone on the couch. He greeted them casually with a wave. "Have a good time?" he asked.
"We did," Raven said. "Thank you."
"Cool," Cyborg said, getting up. "I think I'm gonna hit the sack." He hesitated a second. "Raven, I made that appointment for you tomorrow. I arranged it so you wouldn't have to... you get to go right in so people won't stare or bother you or anything."
Raven nodded. "Thank you again," she said. "That was thoughtful of you." Something in her words suggested that she only barely kept from adding "for a change".
Cyborg headed up the stairs, "Well, good night guys." He sounded unhappy.
When he was gone, Beast Boy sat on the couch and Raven joined him. "It's none of my business," he said, "but when are you going to let him off the hook?"
"Soon," Raven said. She had sat close to him but not very close. His arm stretched across the back of the couch and his hand reached almost exactly behind her. Taking the opportunity, he began running his fingers through her hair. "What are you doing?" she asked.
"I like your hair," he said. "I always have." Raven felt suddenly breathless and found to her surprise that she was leaning her head slightly back to accommodate him. "Still want me to go with you tomorrow?" he asked.
"Yes please," she said softly. He nodded but did not say anything. Raven turned so that she was sitting facing him, her legs curled comfortably under her and her head leaning partly into the couch and partly into his hand. They sat like that for a moment and then he leaned towards her, his hand in her hair naturally curling around behind her head and gently guiding her towards him. They kissed and then pulled away. Both smiled. Then they shifted positions so that she was leaning against him and her head was on his shoulder. They were nearly the same height, so this was an unusual perspective for him. "Want to watch TV?" she asked, handing him the remote. He turned on the television and began flipping channels with his free hand.
Cyborg had told Star earlier that he was going to wait up for Raven because he needed to pass on a message. So, when she heard him come up and enter his room, Star knew that the couple must be home and must be downstairs. She had spent the evening upset on Raven's behalf, even if Raven seemed inexplicably calm. Humans absolutely baffled her sometimes with their obsession with things were meaningless and their unconcern with what was important. She went downstairs to see how her friends were doing, going softly in her bare feet. She came silently into the common room in time to see them kiss and then settle into each other's arms. She felt her heart expand with pleasure at seeing them so happy. She was so filled with joy for them that she lifted involuntarily off the floor and had to struggle not to make a sound and disturb them. Hovering back up to her room, she was able to relax and sleep as she could not do before. All would be well, she knew. All would be well.