It was about twenty minutes before Robin's meeting was to begin when Beast Boy knocked on Raven's door. "Come in," she said, her voice tight with emotional control, not expecting him. When she saw who it was, her face fell just a little. It had been a while since he had felt the need to knock before entering. "Hi," she said softly.
He went to her desk chair and sat. "Hi," he replied.
"I'm glad you're here," she said. He didn't reply. "Let me go first, please," she said. "When I said I was disappointed in you, I was being honest. That was how I felt at the time but I was wrong." He sat back and crossed his arms. "I am very serious when I say how strongly I am against any kind of arrangement with this guy. What I shouldn't have done is ignore your opinion when you disagreed with me. There is some... validity to what you said. If it saves any lives, it is worth considering. I was wrong to be so self-righteous. I am not disappointed in you. I'm sorry."
Gar sat for a second, just long enough to make her nervous. He pursed his lips thoughtfully and nodded. Then he shrugged. "Okay."
Rae actually cocked her head to the side like a confused puppy. Gar almost laughed. "Okay? That's it?"
"Yeah," he said, a hint of amusement in his tone. "That's it." He chuckled. "That was one hell of an apology. You covered all the bases."
"That's it?" she repeated in surprise. Gar chuckled and nodded. She fell back from sitting on her bed to lying on it. "I thought that would be harder."
"Me too," he said, "but now it's my turn." She sat up with her back to the headboard and in her anxiety, she hugged one of her pillows. "It's fine," he said. "This is not bad." Rae nodded and visibly relaxed. He took a deep breath and went on, "We can't let this happen, like you said. We're a couple that works together. True, it's a weird job and we aren't your usual kind of people..."
"Rae and Gar are more important than Raven and Beast Boy," she said. He nodded agreement. "It won't be easy but we have to keep our work and our private lives separate." He nodded again and this time he smiled. "We're Okay?"
Gar didn't answer. He stood and walked, reaching for her. She took his hand. "We are," he said. She drew him down and onto the bed with her. He sat against the headboard and she moved to him, embracing and leaning on him. After a moment, he went on, "You're really seriously against dealing with this guy, aren't you?"
"I think it is absolutely opposed to what heroes need to be," she said.
"If Robin decides to do it..."
"I'll leave the Titans," she said quickly, interrupting him. "I hate it and the thought terrifies me but I can't be a party to something like that. I just can't."
"I'm not saying this is how it would go, but what if you can't stay but I do?"
She thought about it for a moment. "Rae and Gar are more important," she repeated. "We could still be together. We would still be together."
"Might not be easy," he said.
"I can teleport, remember?" she asked. "That would easy up the whole 'long distance relationship' a lot."
"It would," he said. Gar usually made an effort to acknowledge her attempts at humor but he didn't. He was instaed thoughtful and after a second said, "Wow. We really just dealt with all that stuff, didn't we?"
"We really did," Raven said, a little surprise in her tone.
"We're like the best couple ever," he said.
"I know," she said, still sounding surprised.
Gar replied by leaning towards her. She matched him and his hand slid up into her hair, pulling her towards him. They kissed lingeringly and softly at first but a passion that surprised them both overtook them. They rolled together so that they were lying on their sides and held each other fiercely. For the first time, they willingly abandoned control. The kiss became deep and wild; hands caressed heated skin and their breath came in gasps. All around them, small items in room began vibrating and moving by themselves from the extremity of her unfamiliar emotions. It made them pull back. "Too much?" he asked. She nodded agreement and closed her eyes to recover. "Rae?" he asked. She opened her eyes. "I love you," he said. It wasn't the first time he had told her but it wasn't something they ever said casually or often. It was always something special. The room shook for a moment but she mastered herself. The remaining time before the meeting passed quickly and pleasantly. They were very nearly late.
When they arrived, Robin and Cyborg were sitting tensely near each other. Starfire was across from them, her arms crossed and visibly angry. After they sat, Robin spoke. "This guy has done a number on us," he said. "In two days he's beat us down and disrupted the team. My God, I hope this wasn't intentional. If he's that smart on top of everything else, if this is him playing us, we're done."
"First, I don't think it's as bad as all that," Cyborg said, "and he couldn't have planned it."
Robin quirked an eyebrow at him. "Sure he could have. I could have. Slade manipulated us. Lots of people could do it… Rhas Al Gul, Joker, Luthor."
Raven raised an eyebrow and said. "There aren't lots of people like that."
"True," Robin admitted. "I don't think that's the case with Mike. That's why I said 'I hope'."
"Anyway," Cyborg said, "I still say you're exaggerating. We aren't disrupted."
"Really?" Robin replied dryly. "Raven, what will you do if the team decides to take the offer?"
"You mean if you do?" she asked rhetorically. "I would leave the Titans."
Robin glanced at Cyborg, who was slack jawed and clearly stunned. "I am not surprised," Starfire said, breaking the silence. "I could feel your righteous wrath at the idea of surrendering to this man, friend Raven. I share it."
"Would you leave too?" Robin asked.
Starfire shook her head. "No. I think I feel less, a very little less, strongly then does Raven. I do fear that it would forever change the way I feel about what we do and who we are."
"No, our heads haven't been screwed with at all," Robin said acerbically. "I've heard everything I need to. There for a while, I think I did have Batman whispering in my ear. The smart thing to do is to take the deal and take him out the first time he steps too far out of line. I really wanted to find an excuse to do it."
"It's not the right thing," Raven said.
Robin smiled and nodded agreement. "Like the man said, if you can't do something smart, do something right. We're going to find him and we're going to kick one hundred percent of his ass..."
The meeting lasted about an hour. It broke up to a welcome general conviviality. Everyone seemed pleased at the outcome. Beast Boy sat back happily and regarded his friends and team. Calls for large amounts of various foodstuffs were being loudly made. He joined the chorus, thinking as he did about how drastic the change was. They had been as dour and unhappy as they ever had as a team and Robin had, with just a few words, simply fixed it. That was why he was in charge. Across the room, Raven was chatting with Star and Cyborg as Robin made the three calls required to order all the desired food. He didn't get up, choosing instead to relax and wait for someone to bring him food. He also got to watch Rae enjoying other people. She certainly cared for her friends and for the most part enjoyed their company but she seldom looked as happy doing it as she did just then. It pleased him.
Robin jumped over the back of the couch and landed sitting next to Beast Boy. He watched the conversation for a moment too. "I wanted to talk to you," he said quietly. Beast Boy made a relaxed, 'go ahead' gesture. Uncharacteristically, Robin seemed to have trouble starting. "I respect what you and Raven have. I really do. It's been good for both of you."
"Thanks," Beast Boy said, a bit tentatively.
"You're welcome," Robin said dryly. "A big part of what we have to do to win is keep Raven in the fight. We have to protect her."
Beast Boy laughed, "A plan I can get behind."
"I bet," Robin said. "I'm kind of looking forward to it, you know. You, standing between Raven and something like him… it's gonna to be something to see, man. It's gonna be a hell of a thing."
Two tense days passed while they scoured the city for Mike to no avail. They traveled as a group, any forays at less than full strength having being absolutely forbidden by Robin. No sign of Mike could be found. Formal training gave way to exercise pretty much used only as stress relief, except for Beast Boy. When he wasn't out pursuing a lead with the group he was in the gym.
It reached the point that Raven, in a reversal of their usual roles, prepared a meal for him when he seemed to be skipping dinner and took it to him. The door opened and what she saw surprised her. He wasn't using the weights or machines and the martial arts accouterments were idle. She watched him curiously as he stood still, his back to her and the door, bathed in sweat and breathing heavily. He visibly steeled himself for some kind of effort and in an eye blink, he was gone. A hummingbird buzzed a few feet towards the weight rack and was suddenly replaced by a massive gorilla, far larger than any living animal. That was when it hit her. Usually when Gar transformed there was a moment, a bare second, where he didn't move. He was moving now. In the brief instant before the transformation was complete, he had seized a weight bar that she noticed was loaded to exactly half a ton and flung it across the room. The instant the massive piece of steel left his hands, he was a hummingbird again. In that flash of time, she saw the gorilla's face contort with pain. Then he was in the middle of the room and back to his familiar T-Rex shape. He smashed the reinforced wall with his massive tail and again, without stopping, shrunk. It appeared he was becoming something small, possibly the hummingbird again but he instead became himself in mid-air with a cry of pain and slammed to the padded floor. He rolled onto his back, face contorted and eyes closed as he rested for a heartbeat and then began to get up. Raven was already at his side, on her knees and gently holding his shoulder. "What are you doing?" she asked, her cold tone showing exactly how emotional she was.
"I have to be faster," he said, still catching his breath.
Raven thought very carefully about what she next said. "When you change," she said, "you always freeze for a second."
"It hurts if I move," he said shortly.
"A lot?" she asked. He looked as if he were going to deny it but then nodded agreement. He started to get up but she restrained him gently. "Rest a little," she said. He fell back onto the mat. "Gar, does it also hurt more if you change size really fast? Like from a hummingbird to a dinosaur?"
He nodded again and repeated "I have to be faster." She understood. Mike was going to attack her first and hardest. It was his only chance. If he succeeded in incapacitating her, he could run roughshod over the rest of the team. He was just so damn powerful.
Gar wasn't going to let that happen. He couldn't match Mike head on but he could occupy the formidable man for a short, crucial time. It had been exactly his part of the plan Robin had formulated. His job was to protect her for so she could raise her defenses and go on the attack. Robin had chosen well and cynically and she resented it a little.
She didn't know what to say or do and it made her feel helpless. It was an unfamiliar and unpleasant sensation. She stroked his shoulder and almost gasped when her hand touched his quadriceps. It wasn't just tight or tense from exercise, it was actively cramping in what had to be an extremely painful way.
"My God," she said, quickly checking him over. Every major muscle was also in spasm. It must have been excruciating. "Gar, what the hell?" she asked in a quiet, shocked voice.
He slowly got up, his face a mask. She reluctantly let him. "I'm fine," he lied, stretching his convulsed muscles and popping various joints. His face cleared a bit and he said "See? All better." He shook himself to loosen his muscles and saw the plate where she had hastily put it in the floor. "Cool! Food!" he said in a voice he clearly hoped would conceal his discomfort from her.
Rae watched him make his way towards the door where she had all but dropped the plate and wasn't fooled. She thought hard about what to say, nearly overcome with a wave of emotion swirling through her; admiration and respect for the pains he was suffering, guilt that on any level he felt that he had to suffer so; rage for the man who had forced it on him; love. It would make him feel condescended to if she tried to talk him out of his efforts. It would hurt his pride, a thing that he had far less of then he should. She realized that she had to remember that though he was sometimes silly and often boyish, he was a warrior who was preparing for a struggle that he could not, in his mind, lose. He was wolfishly devouring the sandwiches she had brought him. "Enough for today," she said.
He shook his head. "A while longer."
Raven regarded him carefully and ordered her thoughts before she spoke. "Gar, I know what you're doing and I respect it but please, rest now." He shook his head in refusal. "I'm not trying to stop you," she said, "just… call it a day, Okay? What if he showed up right now? What kind of shape are you in?" He shrugged in feigned indifference. Then she pulled out the big guns. "Come rest," she said, "for me? Please."
"Cheater," he said grumpily, stuffing the last of the third faux ham and cheese in his mouth.
She knew that his near legendary appetite was the result of how much energy his transformations used. "Still hungry?" she asked. He nodded agreement. "Go up to my room and take a shower. I'll bring you something and you can relax." He glanced around the room briefly and she added as she left the room "So help me if you try to sneak in 'just a few more minutes'…"
"Okay," he said, raising his hands in a gesture of surrender. Once he got to her room, he realized he had neglected to bring anything to change into. He started out the door but paused, glancing at her dresser. Mostly out of curiosity, he looked in the same drawer she had produced clean clothes for him from a few days before. There, neatly folded, were the things he had taken off that day. He grabbed them and ducked into the bathroom.
He heard the door open and close and Raven called, "Did you find your clothes?" He called back that he had and she placed the plate on the desk before sitting on her bed to wait. In addition to the meal, she had borrowed an economy size container of Tiger Balm from Robin, who swore by the stuff. When Gar finally emerged he was moving like an old man; slow, stiff, and careful. "Hurry up and eat," she said, holding up the jar, "then I'll work you over."
"Oh, baby…" he said with an eyebrow wiggle. She rolled her eyes. Knowing her intent, he was carrying instead of wearing the shirt, his wiry musculature on display. He attacked three more sandwiches with the save fervor he had the first plate. She watched him fondly and was amused that it took exactly nine bites, three per sandwich. She gestured for him to come to her and he lay face down, wearing only a pair of shorts. Raven began spreading the balm on his shoulders, the glow of her healing energy also infusing slowly into his strained muscles. He gasped a little at the initial burn but the feeling of warmth and well being that followed made him relax. "Don't waste your energy," he said.
"Shut up," she answered softly. She tried to be clinical and detached at first but quickly gave up. There was no reason not to let herself enjoy this a little. She knew she was making him feel better, which she was obviously glad of, but his bare skin under her hands felt so good to her. She silently worked, kneading his muscles to the accompaniment of various sounds of pleasure. She went over his back and arms, then his legs.
He turned over, reaching for the jar. "I can…" he said but she caught his hand and placed it back down on the mattress. She started with his pectorals, moving over his shoulders and down his arms rhythmically. She tried to pay attention to her work but the naked emotion in his face made her unable to do anything but meet his eyes. "Thank you," he said in a quiet, surprisingly deep tone.
"Of course," she said, starting on his legs. She sat on her knees and rhythmically leaned back and forth, using her slight weight to bear down on the muscles of his thighs. She finished and found to her surprise that she didn't want to move and break this intimacy. Instead, she wiped her hands on a damp towel she had brought for the purpose, caressed his face, and smiled at him. Gar took her hand and kissed her palm. "You're staying here tonight," she said.
"Getting to be a habit," he said.
"I'm fine with that," she replied. Shifting to his side, his hand was freed to begin stroking the small of her back where her shirt had ridden up, taking his turn to enjoy the feel of his hand on bare skin. She lay down and time passed pleasantly.
A while later, Rae got up to use the facilities and Gar lay back contemplatively. He took the opportunity to stretch and try to further loosen his still painful muscles. A thought had been nagging at him so when she came out, he said, "Rae, why don't you levitate people? You create a platform when Cy or Rob need a lift."
Rae hesitated and spoke diffidently. "I have to extend my soul-self around things to lift them like that and if it's a person, it's… I can feel them. I don't like it. It's too close."
"I see," he said.
She went on carefully, "I think I could with you and it would be okay. With the others, even Robin and I'm closer to him then Cy or Star, it would be unpleasant."
"Part of the plan is for you to levitate him," Gar said sounding displeased.
"And it's going to be kind of awful and I hate being that close to a mind like that but..."
"Can you do anything else?" he interrupted. "Maybe just a platform or a cage or something?"
Rae shook her head slowly. "I don't think so," she said "he has to be held." He did not look pleased. "Gar, I get that you don't like it. I don't much care for what you're doing to yourself but as much as I want to yell and scream at you to stop, I'm not. It's your job, it's for the greater good, and it's for me."
"I need to show you the same respect you're showing me," He interrupted. "I get it." His displeasure was plain.
"These are the waters," she said in an obvious and even a little ham-handed effort at lightening the mood, "that we noble young super heroes in love have to navigate." He tried to go there with her. He truly did. Humor, or at least attempts at it, in the face of terror and danger was usually what he did best. He couldn't even smile right then. "It's a good thing we're like the best couple ever," she said.
That did produce a hard earned little chuckle. "Yeah, I guess it is." He looked at her and actually opened and closed his mouth, beginning to speak but changing his mind.
"What is it?" she asked.
Gar shrugged and spoke, "Raven, there will come a day... maybe a day very soon, when we're not having a disagreement and not under imminent threat and neither of us is in pain."
"Oh, baby..." she said with a wicked smile.