Chapter 8

"Come on, I was so close!"

Matthew walked into the kitchen the following weekend bleary eyed, only to see his brother aiming the toaster sideways. "Al, what the Hell are you doing?" The school week finally ended its torture to make way for the short-lived weekend, and the first thing he saw when he woke up was his brother being stupid.

"What's it look like?" Alfred beamed, holding his hand out toward the plate on the island counter. "Toaster launcher!" He jumped back with a whoop when two slices of toast flew out of the appliance, collided with the side of the cabinet, and fell to the floor.

"How many pieces of bread have you used for this?"

"Today?"

Matthew stared vacantly. "Let's go with that."

Alfred scooped up the crumby slices and jammed them back into the toaster. He adjusted it before pushing down the front lever. "Since we're low on bread, I've been using the same two pieces."

"I don't think I want to reason against that."

Poing! "Yes!" Alfred hollered, jumping up and down. "I did it! Mattie, I did it!"

"That's great Al," Matthew turned from the fridge with a glass of milk. He felt bad for the hockey pucks laying crumpled on the plate. "Are you going to eat those, or did you let our already depleting food store go to waste...even more?"

Alfred's victorious smile grew limp. "I guess if I put enough butter on them, the charred edges won't be so bad." After bathing his slabs of beyond-toasted-toast, he settled on the stool next to his brother, and elbowed him in the side. "You got any plans today, Mattie?"

Matthew lightly swatted him away. "Yeah, I'm going to this wicked party later on and getting knocked up."

"Ha-ha!" Alfred chortled, bits of ash flying out of his mouth. "Wait a minute," he gulped, wincing, "you're not going to an actual party later on, right?"

"Nor am I getting knocked up, no. I'm going to the park later."

"Blech, it's all cold outside. They're calling for snow this afternoon, you know?"

Matthew mustered a smile. "Even better."

Alfred pulled a sour expression. "So, like, you got a girlfriend all of a sudden? You were talking to somebody all secret-secret the other day. And yesterday, if I remember right." He elbowed Matthew's side with an annoying, "Huh? Huh!"

"Stop that! I don't have a girlfriend!"

"Then it was a guy! Dude!"

"Nothing like that!"

Alfred whistled as he grabbed a overly crisp piece of toast. "Mattie!"

"I said shut up. You sound like Dad now! Every time I talk to someone, he thinks it's because I want to jump their bones!"

"Hey, I'm not judging!" Crunch! "Woo, that's buttery. I don't know what I'm doing. It's the weekend, so why make plans? I might play some video games later."

Matthew eased. "You do that nearly everyday you come home from school."

"Yeah, but since it's Saturday, I can play them all day."

He rolled his eyes, but smiled. "Of course."

Alfred, unabashed, announced, "I might invite Artie over later, too, and I can beat his ass!"

Milk spewed out of Matthew's mouth.

"I mean in video games!"

"Of course you did." Coughing, Matthew grabbed for a few napkins.

Alfred must have noticed his brother's bitter look, as he nudged him and said, "He's not that bad of a person, Mattie!"

Not bad of a person, maybe, but bad at being a person...yes. Alfred stared, obviously wanting Matthew to say something reassuring. "I never said he was."

"Pfft! I know that! It's just that he can seem...cold at times, but I think that he has trouble getting along with people." Alfred must have thought it was a good idea to add, "Kind of like you in the morning!"

Does he even know? Matthew could not bring up the topic of the glowy guy being something more than what meets most people's eyes. He was not sure Alfred knew, and if he did not know, and if it was brought up, it could be compromising to secret identities! Then again, do I even know?

"Be quiet and eat your toast. If you can even call it that."

~.~

~BOING~

~.~

Matthew caught himself mauling over his curly bedhead like a self-conscious fashionista in the bathroom mirror. One should dress nicely when going out with a potential friend, demonic or not. "A demon, huh? Much less Hellfire and screaming than I thought there would be." Staring at the shadows under his eyes, he wondered if the only way he could get friends was through Hell and back.

In pursuit of warm clothes, Matthew slunk away after he wasted enough time in front of the bathroom mirror. When he made it downstairs, Alfred was already starting his marathon in front of the TV. He glanced over his shoulder and slugged an arm over the sofa, "Heya, Mattie, where you going?"

"Out," Matthew simply replied, bending down to pull up his socks that were trying to sneak away from his ankles. "I already told you I was going to the park."

His brother stared at him for a few moments, checking out his winter gear. Matthew expected Alfred to offer to go, but instead, he said, "Did you ever consider pulling up your hair into a man bun?"

"What?"

"A man bun, Mattie! You should grow you hair out like Dad's, so you can style it into a bun!"

"I'm leaving now, Al. Try not to break your ribs again."

"That was one time!"

"One time is all it takes!"

Matthew grew quiet, reveling in the crisp late morning without those awful winds chewing at his skin. He wondered what sort of things demons do for fun. Poke people with pitchforks? As far as he was concerned, Ivan did not have a pitchfork on him. Dangling off of monkey bars would have to suffice.

Despite the winter air, Matthew cheeks grew warm as he murmured to himself with a smile, "Speak of the devil."

"Mattie!" Ivan called out, several paces ahead. "It is cold!"

"I know you should 'bundle up' during winter, but this is a whole new level!"

"Mattie!"

"All right, I'll stop pulling your leg. You must not be used to the cold, since, uh, where you come from..."

"You're right." Ivan flapped a hand in his face, "My skin is cracking and bleeding, it is so cold!"

Matthew grabbed his hand and gasped at the little frays of skin sticking up from Ivan's knuckles. "Oh, no, are you all right?!"

"Ha-ha, don't worry! I am very strong! It is just something I did not expect..." Ivan lifted their hands to examine Matthew's gloves. "This is to protect yourself? Interesting."

"Y-yeah! That scarf you have will definitely help. Here, it'll work better if you wrap it a little more snugly...and maybe tuck it in a bit, too...oh!" Matthew jerked away when Ivan hunched up his shoulders. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to get all...weird?"

"No, Mattie, that is not weird, that is actually very kind of you." The momentarily bewildered expression lifted from Ivan's face to a cheeky smile, "Thank you for taking care of me in this strange place!"

"You're welcome!" Matthew found himself pleasantly surprised. He ducked deeper into his coat, trying to be a bit more calm, "Yeah, you're welcome."

"I am very glad to hear that. So, what will we do?"

"Well, we're all dressed up, so it wouldn't make sense to go inside already, plus my brother's lurking back at home. There aren't any games playing at the town hall right now, at least, I don't think so..." Matthew shrugged, "We could go to the nearby park. It's really pretty when it snows and people haven't destroyed it yet. Come on, I'll show you."

"Oh, pretty?" Ivan seemed delighted as Matthew latched onto his arm and towed him down the road. "Yes, lead the way!"

~.~

~BOING~

~.~

That day must have been too cold and foreboding even for little kids to want to hang out at the park. To call it a park was generous; there was only a metal slide, some rusty monkey bars, and a couple of swings, but at least they were alone. Ivan did not try out the jungle gym, but he did enjoy swinging once he got a hang of it. Even more so as Matthew crept behind and started to push him, and he realized doing so would take him places.

"Higher! Mattie, higher!"

Matthew was absolutely baffled as this creature of Hell giggled like a little kid. "Only if you push me next!"

They switched, and the first time Ivan pushed his back, Matthew almost fell off the swing, face-first into the dirt. Not that he minded - he was having too much fun, and holy cow, could the guy push! Matthew swore he was going to do a three-sixty and wrap around the bar up top.

Ivan stopped pushing without saying anything, and Matthew drug his heels into the ground to look behind himself in curiosity. "What's up?"

Earlier, a little bit of flurries had trickled onto the frosty grass, but actual, good quality clumps of snow came around and started to coat everything in white. Ivan held out a palm and brought it closer to his face, only for the itty flakes to melt, and he tried to catch some more.

"What is this weird...stuff?! It...it looks white, but then leaves...little water when I touch it!"

"Oh, you never...?" Matthew sprung from the swing to hold his hands out, showing the snow flakes melting in his hands, too. "It's snow!"

"Etsno?"

"Snow! If it is cold enough, this comes down instead of rain."

"Oh!" A thick chunk of snow landed right on the tip of Ivan's nose, causing him to flinch and swat as the clump melted. "It just-" He craned his head back, and flinched as these mysterious flakes clung to his eyelashes. "It is so...white!"

"Well, don't let it get into your eyes, dummy!" Matthew laughed as this fully grown man knelt down and grabbed at some of the snow already sticking to the dead grass blades, but immediately retracted and vigorously shook his hand. "Let me guess, cold?"

"This is so weird!" Ivan swished a hand through the grass again, only to shake off the snow clinging onto him. "I know rain, but...the air is so...cold, that it clumps into these little flakes. What a strange place."

Matthew took this opportunity to pull together a decent clump of snow while Ivan rambled to himself. The snowball make a satisfying thump, exploding into a cloud of white down his back. He clamped his hands over his mouth, trying not to laugh noisily without much success as Ivan just squatted there, not saying anything, not moving for a long moment. Then, he whipped around with a pile of snow gathered in his palm and threw it, but it was not packed, so it flew back into his face.

"Oh," Ivan pouted, wiping at his eyes before erupting into a brigade of embarrassed giggles. "This snow is not good for throwing. How did you-" Another ball of snow splattered right in the middle of his face.

"Shit!" Matthew spat. Ivan blinked the snow flakes from his eyes and gave a curious tilt of the head. "Are you all right?! I didn't mean to hit you right in the face! Great, I sound like an asshole-"

Ivan lunged forward, and Matthew cut off with a scream as their bodies collided and fell onto the ground.

"Wait, wait, wait, wait-!"

Loud snarling and a great weight pinned Matthew to the cold grass, and he could only feebly kick his feet in sudden panic...just before a glob of powdery snow smacked his head. He flinched and sputtered, just as Ivan swept his arms out to dump more snow onto him.

"Hey!" Matthew cackled in disbelief, and reached around for ammunition to shower Ivan in a baptism of white. "Here, you bastard, how's this?!"

"Mattie!" Ivan scolded, now completely coated in snow.

"Oh! It's a game!" A passing voice hardly registered over their wreathing and howls of unbridled laughter. "I thought...okay, whatever makes you happy, amigos."

Ivan sat up. "Did someone say something?"

Matthew followed suit with an unattractive grunt. He felt warm despite sitting in snow, and didn't know what else to say besides, "Your face is all red."

"So is yours!" Ivan reached to brush a hand against Matthew's hair, laughing even more from the stupid face Matthew made while he did it. "Look how much of this...snow is everywhere! Are you cold?"

"A little, yeah."

"Me, too! I don't think we should sit in it any longer. Certain parts of me are getting very numb-!"

"All righty then!" Matthew scrambled to his feet and started to dust himself off. "There's a convenience store nearby. We can go grab something to warm up."

Ivan shot to his feet, too, eager at the prospect of 'warm.' "A...convenience store? How can a store be convenient?"

"Well, you go in there, grab what you want, pay for it, and leave. In and out." Matthew smiled nervously as Ivan came closer and brushed the snow from his coat, instead of worrying about the copious amount on himself. "Pretty cool, huh?"

"That is convenient! Wow!" A big hand gave Matthew's shoulders a firm squeeze, making him hunch up. "Ooh, your shoulders are strong!"

Matthew's voice came out a bit too high, "Thanks! You too!"

'You too.' This is why I don't have friends.

Ivan laughed as if Matthew was not contemplating the image of smashing his own face into a tree. "I would like a convenient drink now!"

~.~

~BOING~

~.~

One measly option of hot drinks in the littlest cup wouldn't satisfy this creature. Oh, no, he grabbed the biggest cup the gas station had, and pressed every damn one of those buttons on the hot cocoa machine, almost making it spill all over the counter and the floor like a deranged customer. Not that stopped him from sticking a finger in the current pouring of the machine and burning himself like it was nothing.

The cashier, the poor, poor cashier broke into a cold sweat from Ivan's relentless smile. As Matthew handed her some money, her eyes kept jumping somewhere, anywhere from the towering figure leaning over the puny check-out counter with devilish grin. Matthew mouthed 'Stop it,' but Ivan did not get the memo.

"You...you really don't know how to act human at all, do you?" Matthew asked once they stepped out of the convenience store.

"What? That is silly, Mattie. Look at me!" Ivan had better not be motioning at the tacky jacket and too-short old-man slacks that he decided was a decent outfit. "I have never looked more human than I do now."

"Oh, no..."

Like a wild beast, Ivan threw back his cup, gulping down the scalding cocoa as if it didn't roast his tongue alive. Maybe it did not. Matthew was not sure, and he was not sure if he wanted to be sure.

"I cannot believe this snow is still coming. How long does it take for it all to come down?"

"It varies. Sometimes snowfall only lasts a few minutes, other times it takes hours or even days."

Ivan just looked confused.

"Uh...it varies from...here and gone, to the time it takes for you to eat a good meal to the time...between you going to sleep, waking up, and then going to sleep again."

"Wow!" Now he got it. "So, you do not know?"

"Most of the time...no."

Ivan tried to swat at the flakes hitting his face like that would stop them. "This could last for several sleeps?! I am sorry you have to deal with that!"

Matthew shrugged. "It's only during the winter. Besides...I kind of like the snow. It's...sparkly. At least until it starts melting."

"It melts?!"

"Yep! And sometimes if it gets cold again, it freezes into ice! Isn't that just great?"

"No! I do not like the ice. It is too slippery, and you do not know where you will go. At least with lava, you know it is there and you should be going the opposite way!"

"Oh! You have a lot of lava just sitting around?"

"Yes! It is very hot, and that does not change or freeze or anything like this 'snow' does."

Matthew was not sure if he should ask, but, "What's...what's it like down there?"

Not seeing anything wrong with spouting about Hellfire, Ivan nonchalantly announced, "Warm!" He laughed, "Even the rain is warm! I almost miss it already."

"Rain? You get rain in Hell? Whoa," Matthew put a hand to his mouth. "That sounds weird just saying it casually like that."

Ivan smiled into his cup before taking more big gulps. "Yes, we have rain! Although it doesn't...fling around like snow does. It is more smaller, if that makes sense."

"It mists?"

"Yes! A mists! And only in higher lands, too. It is very dry and humid if you fly away from the mountains."

"Well, I'm not flying anywhere."

"Aha-ha-ha! Silly Mattie!" Ivan smacked Matthew's lower back, almost making him drop his cup of cocoa on the sidewalk. "Of course not! You do not have wings!"

"Oh, yeah," Matthew tossed his eyes with a sneaky smile. "How could I forget?"

Ivan peeled off the lid of his cup and let out a yell of shock, "I have no more?!"

"You, uh, drank it all."

"Can I get more?"

"Now?"

"Yes."

"Ivan, we are almost at my house."

"Do you have any there?"

Matthew sighed, although not really annoyed, "Yes, you beast, I'll get you more cocoa."

Ivan let out a squeal of glee.

"My brother is home, though. I don't think you two had met before."

"I have seen him around. I think. Unless that was you?" Ivan elbowed him with another giggle as they crossed the front yard.

"Ha, ha." Matthew stopped before the door, and sucked in air through his teeth as if there was an inconvenience, "Actually, my dad probably doesn't want strangers in his house while he's away..."

Ivan stopped laughing. He was stumped for a moment before blurting, "I am not a stranger!"

Taking defeat with ease, Matthew grinned and cracked open the door. "All right then, stranger, let's go." The heat from inside wrapped around his face, welcoming them from the cold, but before he could step inside, Ivan drew a loud, shaky breath. He yanked Matthew from the doorway.

"What? Hey!" Matthew tried to pull forward, laughing because this probably was another one of Ivan's jests. Ivan did not budge. His empty cup fell onto the porch, rolling away, and it grew quiet between them. "Um...Ivan?"

"There is an actual stranger in your house!"

Blehps:

Matthew dared his reflection to judge. "Fight me, you hoser."

The reflection held up two fists. "When and where?"

"What the fuck?!"