[A/N: Hey dudes - apologies for the radio silence. Decided very last minute to go away camping and only got back to the comforts of civilization (ie electricity and phone reception) yesterday.

Thanks for the feedback on the last chapter! I was tossing up exactly where to finish that scene, and I did have a sneaking suspicion that ending it where i did, wouldn't totally satisfy all of you. On the one hand, I think the scene as written covers all the emotional and plot points needed for the story, and hopefully gave you enough of a feeling as to how things were panning out that you could fill in the gaps yourself. All that was really left was the smutty detail. On the other hand, that smutty detail can be pretty damn fun (although perhaps not everyone's cup of tea). However, I have written the rest of that scene, and I am thinking I may post it as a one shot. It still needs a final edit, but I reckon could get it up this week - if you're interested?]

Some time later, Asha lay in the dark letting the cool air dry her sweat slick skin. Daryl was sprawled face first on the bedroll next to her, the heavy weight of his arm still draped across her bare chest. She wasn't sure if he was entirely asleep or not, but the hard lines at the sides of his mouth and between his brows had faded. She smiled faintly, taking in the dark hair falling across his face, but then her lips compressed into a thin line as her eyes fell on the layers of latticework beaten into his back―half concealed by the darkness but undeniably there.

No pity, but jeeze what type of monster did that, and to his own kids?

She ran her eyes over his back, tracing the broadness of his shoulders, the dark tattoo on his shoulder blade and the hard curve of the muscle shaping into his rib cage. After a moment, she didn't see the scars at all, and found she was biting her bottom lip as something pulled low in her stomach. For a moment, she thought of waking him, see if she could interest him another round. Then she rolled her eyes.

God woman, it's been a long time between drinks but no need to guzzle him all at once.

She shifted slightly, and Daryl's arm tightened. He mumbled something incoherent into the bedroll.

'One of us is actually supposed to be on watch,' she murmured softly, nudging his arm with a bit more force.

His eyes slit open, jerking his arm back when he realised where it was. 'I'll go.'

'Nah, I got it. Go back to sleep.'

She brushed the dark hair off his temple, noting his eyes had closed again already. She pulled her clothes on―silently thanking Maggie or Michonne for sending a clean change up with Daryl―then slipped out to the balcony, settling against the concrete wall and drawing her knees up to her chest.

The air was quiet and still, the outline of the woods as unmoving as a cardboard cut out against the moonlit sky. The only movement was the walkers along the fence, and even their motion seemed half hearted under the cover of night. The moon was bright, but not bright enough to make out details. She wrapped her arms around her knees and rested her chin on her forearms, not looking for details, but looking―as Daryl had taught her―for any movement that seemed out of place―anything that was quick when the air was still, straight where the walkers were unsteady and aimless.

Eventually she became aware of the tears leaking silently down her cheeks.

Oh Nash.

She'd tapped a reservoir of grief inside her so deep she was sure it would never run dry. But she was angry at Nash too. How could he have been so stupid? She'd always been the one urging caution for them, he'd always been too ready to trust. And she felt guilty for feeling angry at him...guilty for not finding him before he'd crossed Seth's path.

She wrapped her arms tighter around her knees, the twinge of overstretched muscles in her hips and back suddenly filling her mind with an image from earlier that evening, of Daryl gripped between her thighs, breath ragged in her ear as he shuddered, his weight resting heavy and spent against her. The increasingly familiar pull in her stomach accompanied the image. She looked over her shoulder where she could just make out his dark form, and could picture in her mind again how relaxed his sleeping face looked. She felt a tug of warmth in her chest, and kept her eyes on him a moment longer, savouring the sensation of something other than grief and guilt and anger. Then she blinked a couple of times and turned back out to the darkness to keep watch.

The little flicker of warmth stayed present in her chest, and she held on to it like a lifeline as her eyes tracked across the woods and walkers.

Daryl woke up slowly.

His brain was blurry and for a minute he didn't remember how he'd got in that state. Then his half asleep mind provided him with an image of Asha―back arched, head tipped back and gasping as her nails dug into the small of his back.

He tried to stay asleep. If he was dreaming, it was a damn good dream.

Then he felt cool air shift across his back―his bare back.

He jerked awake.

Shit, that had actually happened.

It was still dark, the moon had shifted but he couldn't have been asleep more than a few hours. He didn't even remember falling asleep. They were good hours of sleep though, he could feel it in the relaxation and heavy weight of his own limbs. He doubted he'd moved the entire time. He rolled over and blinked a couple of times at the ceiling as his memory of their pre sleep activities came back.

He scrubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands, lips flattening into a thin line.

Stupid. How could he have been so stupid to let that happen? Not that he was regretting it―hell, he could feel his body stirring again at the montage of sound and sights his mind was playing back to him―and if Asha was still laying beside him, he'd already have a hand wrapped around her hip pulling her towards him.

But she wasn't beside him.

He still wasn't really sure how it had happened. He hadn't believed it when she'd said she wanted him, the words had stuck on the surface and refused to sink in. But he'd seen the hurt in her eyes when he hadn't responded and she'd turned away―and if his brain hadn't processed it, his body had, and he'd found himself on his feet, hand gripping her wrist, certain of nothing but that if he let her climb away down that ladder he'd be sorry about it for all of his days.

He rubbed his face.

She was going to regret this. She said she knew what she wanted, but he knew really it had been her grief talking. He couldn't face the hurt in her eyes, so now he was going to have the face the shame when she mumbled those words to him― 'this was a mistake'.

He shouldn't have listened to her.

Damn pussy.

He could just see Asha's bare feet where she sat outside with her back against the wall. He grimaced, sitting up and pulling on a shirt. No use putting it off.

He got up quietly and steeled himself before taking the few steps outside and folding himself down cross legged next to Asha. Her eyes were on the treeline. He watched her from the corner of his eye―noting with some satisfaction that her long braid was a mess from their earlier efforts, loose strands pale in the moon light.

He waited for her to glance at him, for her eyes to roll nervously away, looking for signs of discomfort as she worked herself up to tell him it had been a mistake. His lip twitched in a half snarl at the thought of hearing her say it.

Her knees were drawn into her chest, arms crossed loosely around them. She turned to him, resting her chin on her shoulder and gave him a small smile. 'Sleep well?' Her voice was soft, drifting gently to him in the still night air.

'Ya shoulda woken me already.'

Her smile widened. 'Nah. You were dead to the world. Looked like you needed it.'

'Mhhmmm.' He had.

'Ain't slept naked in a long time,' he muttered. Then cursed himself silently, he hadn't meant to say that.

Asha grinned, teeth gleaming in the moonlight. 'Sleeping naked was always my favourite way to sleep.' She glanced over her shoulder at the bedroll. 'I hadn't realised how much I was missing that

His brows furrowed. 'Sleeping naked?'

She nudged him with her shoulder. 'The bit before the sleeping idiot.'

'Hmmm.' He didn't trust himself to answer properly.

They were quiet for a moment. Daryl continued to discretely watch Asha as she turned to look back out over the yard. She didn't look uncomfortable, if anything she looked more relaxed then she had for a while. He frowned, maybe she wasn't regretting it? Maybe she just wasn't regretting it yet?

'You know,' she said wryly, keeping her eyes on the darkness. 'I haven't been laid since before the turn.'

'Weren't no one at your last camp?' He almost didn't want to know, but couldn't help himself asking.

'No.' She grimaced. 'There was this one guy who was...persistent and unwelcome. A real sleeze bag, I think he thought the end of the world had just improved his chances. Actually, it was worse than that. It felt like he thought everyone who was female and survived owed him something. Took a real liking to me, God knows why, I never encouraged him.' She shuddered. 'He used to follow me. I never knew where he was going to show up… made my skin crawl.'

Daryl's eyes narrowed, and he felt his jaw tighten.

She glanced at him and patted his arm. 'Nothing happened. The first time he tried to put a hand on me I broke his nose. Then when Nash got back from the run he was on at the time, he re broke it, along with half his face. Was knocked clean out for about an hour.' Asha's face darkened. 'But after that, he started following Ren. He would lurk around her, enough to make her uncomfortable, but not enough for anyone to think he was really a threat, but he would look at me with this smirk and this look in his eyes. Then he cornered me one day, leering at me as he warned me that Nash wouldn't be around forever, and that I couldn't keep an eye on Ren all the time.' She broke off, a muscle leaping in her throat as her jaw rippled.

Daryl waited quietly.

Her voice was flat. 'So that night, I crept into his room and woke him up with my knife against his throat, hard enough to draw blood, and promised him that the next time he went near Ren, I wouldn't just nick him.'

Daryl squinted, feeling anger ball in his stomach. 'That was stupid, ya coulda been hurt.'

She nodded. 'Nash was just outside the door, but we thought it would be better if he was scared of me, since Nash was away on runs a lot. But yeah, it was pretty damn stupid, but it had the effect we wanted, for a while anyway, and after that ...well, didn't matter.'

Her face was blank as she looked out into the dark, but her unbandaged hand was clenched in a fist.

'Sorry, shouldn't of asked.'

She trapped his eyes with hers. 'Don't be sorry,' she said quickly. 'You can ask me whatever you want. If today didn't send you running for the woods, I think you'll handle the rest of it.' She grimaced, looking away.

Her good hand was reflexively clenching and unclenching. Daryl watched hypnotised for a moment, before swallowing hard and reaching out and wrapping her long fingers in his hand, gently stopping their movement. Her fingers twitched in the confines of his palm.

She'd taken him by surprise earlier that day, but that was all. The husky sound of her voice explaining what she'd done to those men would stay with him forever. But when the surprise had worn off, he hadn't cared. So she had a bit of darkness, who didn't these days?

She looked at him, a shadow behind her eyes.

'Ain't none of us left got clean hands in this world Ash.'

Her hand jerked in his and her mouth twisted. 'Mine aren't just dirty Daryl. They're soaked to the elbows in blood.' She swallowed hard and looked away from him. 'And I don't see anything in the future other than them becoming bloodier.'

An image leapt to mind, of Asha blood drenched in the woods earlier that day. He ground his teeth together, shifting his grip to wrap her hand more securely in his.

She swallowed hard, and her voice was hoarse when she continued. 'I didn't know I had that in me before the turn. Now, what scares me most is that looking back, I wouldn't change it...I'm not proud of it, but in the same circumstances I would do the same thing to those men―worse if I could figure out how―and I would hamstring Seth and beat answers out of him.' Her head hung heavily on her neck. 'And i'll keep doing it. If there's reason enough, I'll keep doing it, and every time I do, little pieces of who I used to be are going to keep breaking away, until I'm completely lost.'

'Ya ain't lost Asha.'

She snorted and tugged her hand away. 'You know what Seth said? He said that killing people was easy, that it had always been easy and society had just been covering up. And do you know what I thought as soon as he said it? I thought, it's not easy, but it's not as hard as it should be.' She hugged her legs in tight to her body, burying her head in her knees and wrapping her good arm around her head. 'Who thinks like that?' Her words were muffled by her arm.

Daryl was silent for a long moment. 'People who live in the real world.'

'Nash didn't. Yeah he killed people when he had to, but I could tell it was harder for him than it was for me.'

He could feel the self loathing rolling of her words. Her arm was still wrapped around her head.

He chewed his bottom lip a moment, thinking.

'Ya ever hear about Randall?'' he asked eventually. 'About what happened at the farm?'

Her dark rimmed eyes peered at him from above the arm wrapped around her knees. 'I think I heard someone mention his name when Andrea was around. Something to do with Shane right?'

Daryl grunted. 'Ended up that way. At the start, he was with a group that attacked Rick and Hershel when they were on a run. He got injured, his people left him behind and Rick brought him back to the farm. He was barely more than a kid.' He looked down at his hands. For a moment he could feel Randall's face crunching beneath his knuckles again. 'I had to persuade him to tell us about his group, what he knew about ours.'

He could feel the pressure of her eyes on him.

'Why you?' she asked softly.

'Back then, it was harder for Rick than me. He couldn't do it, not with Carl. And Shane...Shane woulda just killed him.' He shrugged, looking out over the yard. 'I ain't proud of it...but I ain't exactly ashamed of it either. Was just what needed doing at the time.'

Asha was watching him, eyes unreadable in the dark, but her arm had loosened around her head.

'I ain't sayin' it's the same, but ya didn't kill those men for fun.' He chewed his bottom lip for a moment. 'And just cause ya can do something, that don't have t' be all ya are. It ain't everything.'

She smiled at him, the shadow suddenly receding behind her eyes and the tension fading from her face. She shifted closer to him, wrapping her arm around his and leaning into him.

'Thanks,' she murmured softly.

He grunted. After a moment his hand shifted of its own accord, and wrapped around the inside of her knee where it rested against him. They sat together in the darkness until Daryl felt Asha's head starting to slip against his shoulder.

'Asha.'

'Hmmm?'

'Go to bed. I got this now.'

[A/N: BTW, backtracking to the season finale for a moment, if Glenn got out of being swarmed by all those walkers without being bit or scratched, I am going to be annoyed - not that i want anything to happen to Glenn, I rate Glenn, he's a great character. But you can't just put characters in situations like that with out there being consequences!]