Alright guys I do write these chapters ahead of time, so I try to get you pretty speedy updates for the most part. But I'm also living in an apartment complex that has no WiFi and the closest place that does have it is the coffee house here in town, and packing my baby all the way over there and sitting for any amount of time with her is nearly impossible because she gets so bored so fast. So mostly I'm just uploading these using the WiFi hotspot on my phone, and it take FOREVER if it even loads at all…which it never does! So please bear with me! Thanks for reading and enjoy.
Disclaimer: Fifty Shades of Grey and all its characters are the work of E.L. James. I don't own anything.
"Phoebe? Are you alright this morning?" Cavin asks me after 20 minutes of silence.
It's first period, which means I'm alone in a classroom with Cavin for two whole hours because I'm his student aid.
"Yeah, sorry I'm fine. Just a little sleepy." I say, slightly awkwardly.
"Maybe we need to wake you up a little bit then." Cavin whispers as he makes his way over to where I'm sitting.
My breathing hitches and instantly my panties flood. He sounds so hot when he uses that tone of voice. It's almost as if he's a hunter and I'm his prey, and I am captivated by him.
"Stand up Phoebe." He orders softly, running his fingers up and down my arm, raising goose bumps along the way.
I do as I'm told, and he grabs my hips and pulls me toward him.
"It's seems like you've done a good job of waking me up, and it seems I need to return the favor." He's grinding his erection into me slowly, creating wonderful friction.
Suddenly he spins me around and pushes me down onto the desk so I'm bent over it with my ass sticking straight up into the air. He slowly slides his fingers across my panties.
"It seems we have a naughty girl on our hands. Is someone hot for teacher?" He whispers into my ear feeling how soaked I am, and I moan listening to his dirty talk. "Should we punish you for such behavior?" He says, and his tone is that of a predator again.
He's running his hands along my backside, kneading it on occasion. I moan because it feels so good. Then suddenly, without warning, right as his hand leaves my backside and is about to come down on it again, the fire alarm goes off.
"Phoebe! Turn off that damn alarm!" Teddy's voice calls, and my eyes snap open!
Damn it! It was just a dream! And I wasn't even able to get off in it either! Now I'm left wanting, and there's nothing I can do about it.
I groan and smack my alarm clock, so it stops it's annoying beeping, and glare at it. Piece of shit…woke me up before the good part.
I lay in bed for a little bit longer trying to get back to sleep, hoping that my dream might pick up where it left off, but it's pointless. I decide to get up and take a shower…a cold shower.
"Well don't you just look like a big ball of sunshine." Teddy laughs, as I make my way into the kitchen.
"Shut up!" I snap. If it wasn't for him I might have actually gotten to the good part. Who knows maybe the sprinklers would have been activated by the alarm and come on and we would have fucked as we were being drenched by the water spraying down on us.
"Jeez what did I do to you?" He asked, obviously surprised by my tone.
"Nothing. Sorry." I mutter. "I guess I just woke up kind of cranky today."
"Does it have anything to do with what you told me last night?" He asks.
"Yes and no. Really it's not important. Sorry I snapped at you, I just have a lot on my plate right now what with midterms coming up, and all this shit between Cavin and I."
"I still can't believe that you're thinking about pursuing a relationship with your high school English teacher. He's how much older than you?"
"Only five years. And since when does age matter to you? I'm eighteen years old, no longer a minor, and I can date whoever the hell I want to, and honestly if he was forty and I thought he was the one I wouldn't hesitate to go after him." I'm so angry at Teddy for playing the age card.
"Chill out Phoebe. I'm just saying, you know how Mom and Dad are going to react to this if and when they find out."
I flinch because I know exactly how they will react and it's not pretty, for anyone involved. And that's the tricky part-going against their trust just to be with a guy. I still wasn't sure that I was even going to pursue a relationship with Cavin, but if I did I would have to keep it a secret from Mom and Dad at least until graduation, and probably far beyond that.
"Well if I do decide to go after him, I'll just have to wait to tell Mom and Dad." I say after a long silence.
"Are you sure that's something you're comfortable with?"
"Of course not Teddy, but I also don't want to see the chance for true love slip out of my hands." I say.
"You really think that this guy is your one true love?" Teddy asks skeptically.
"I don't know!" I snap. "I haven't really got the chance to explore the possibility now have I?"
"Look I know you're stressed out about all this, but seriously don't take it out on me. I didn't do anything to you. In fact you should be really thankful that I haven't beat the shit out of this guy for having a relationship with his student who also happens to be my little sister, or worse told Mom and Dad about it."
He is right, he really has been cool about all of this, and it makes me feel bad for getting angry at him. "Alright I'm sorry, and I know I'm asking you to do a lot for me by keeping this from Mom and Dad. I just have to figure out a few things before I tell anyone, but I promise Mom and Dad will know, and I'll be the one to tell them. I just need some time."
"Alright, but like I said last night, don't expect me to lie for you. If you want to go out with this guy and need to sneak around Mom and Dad, you're going to have to sneak around me also, because if I know what you're really doing, and Mom and Dad ask me I will tell them. You may be comfortable lying to them, but I'm not."
"I'm going to head to school. I have all first period with Cavin, and I'm more confused than ever now."
"See you Phebs. I hope you make the right decision here, and only you will know what that is."
I nod, and make my way out the door. I'm really not ready to face Cavin just yet, but I know it's inevitable, and to make it worse I won't have Alex here either to remind me of the difference between right and wrong.
When I walk into Cavin's classroom he isn't there, so I quickly make my way to the desk that I always sit at and take out my homework from the night before, and stick my headphones in my ear and turn my IPod on full blast. I know Cavin won't have an issue with it because he always lets me finish up my homework and listen to music. I just hope that he doesn't try to talk to me about anything that happened yesterday.
I sit for a while and plug away at my Calculus homework. I can't believe that I put it all off last night. It's very obvious that I'm letting Cavin affect me way too much.
Out of the corner of my eye I see the classroom door open, and my heart starts to pound. I quickly glance up to see that it's not Cavin standing in the doorway, but our usual sub Mrs. Crenshaw. I breathe a sigh of relief, while my heart simultaneously sinks into the pit of my stomach.
"Ah Phoebe thank goodness you're here! Mr. Blumm forgot to leave the keys to his desk and it seems you're the only one who has a spare set." She says obviously relieved.
"Oh, yeah no problem Mrs. Crenshaw let me get that for you." I say and take the keys out of my backpack. Cavin doesn't usually take his keys home with him, so I'm confused as to why he did last night.
"Go ahead and read the notes he left for me Phoebe. I have to go back to the office and let them know that you're here."
I nod, and she leaves the classroom again. I open his top drawer only to find a folded piece of paper addressed to me. I open it slowly, knowing this is why Cavin made sure I was the only one who had the keys. He only wanted me to find this.
Phoebe,
I realized yesterday after you left that I had probably given you quite a bit to process. I know that I myself have much to think about. From the time you stepped into my classroom it became painfully clear to me that there was no way I would be able to hide how I felt for you for very long, and I'm truly surprised that I made it this far without saying anything to you.
Yesterday I told you that I would give you space and this is my way of doing that. Please don't think that I am trying to avoid you in any way. In fact staying away from you is going to be the hardest thing that I could possibly do. I feel like an adolescent boy who is forced to stay home sick when he really wants to see the girl he has a crush on, and in some ways I am that boy, but I'm also man enough to know that we both have to think about where we stand, what we want, and how we want to approach this, if at all.
I wasn't lying yesterday when I said that I would be disappointed if you didn't choose me. I know that you are the only one who can make this decision, and I promise you that if you do decide that I am the one you want I will do anything in my power to make sure that we have a fighting chance. Even if it means waiting until the end of the school year when you have graduated and are no longer my student. Think it through while I'm gone. I will be back on Monday, please don't feel as though you need to give me an answer then though. I just thought it would be nice to give you some room. Have a good rest of your week Phebs and try not to miss me too much. ;)
Yours,
Cavin
I smile at his letter, and can't help but think about how lucky I am that Cavin is so understanding of my reluctance to immediately enter into a relationship with him. I really do appreciate that he has given me time to think about this without having to be around him too much.
On the other hand I know I'm going to miss him; probably too much, but I don't want to dwell on that for very long.
I make my way back to my desk where my music is still on full blast, and return to my homework. It's going to be a very long day without Cavin or Alex here to distract me.
Thinking of Alex makes me feel guilty because I haven't been thinking about him very much since last night with Mr. Blumm. I decide to text him, because I do love him, and I want him to know that. Hey baby just thinking about you. I'm going to miss you today. Love you lots, and I can't wait to see you again, I quickly type out and send.
It hurts to know that I betrayed Alex's loyalty and trust. I know I'm not that type of person and there is no way that I will continue my relationship with Cavin while I'm still with Alex.
My phone vibrates, signaling that I got another message. Love you too, busy, talk to you later. I glare at my phone as if it was the reason his text came across so short. It's always like this when his sister comes to town. He barely ever talks to me, and when he does find time to text me it always seems like he's annoyed with me.
I let out a heavy sigh and turn back to my homework. By the middle of the period I've finished all my homework assignments from the previous nights, and finished an extra credit essay for my Film as Literature class on the differences between the Novel "Of Mice and Men" and it's film adaptation.
"Phoebe?" Mrs. Crenshaw asked after a few moments silence.
I look up in response, and remove one of my ear buds.
"If you've finished with whatever it was that you were working on and Mr. Blumm doesn't have anything that he was having you work on then you are free to go until next period. Cavin…I mean Mr. Blumm didn't give me any notes on what to have you do, and it seems he got everything else completed before he left. Why don't I write you a pass, and you can go ahead and go get yourself a coffee or something. There's no sense in you being here twiddling your thumbs."
"Thanks Mrs. Crenshaw. That would be awesome." I smile because I know exactly what I'm going to do.
Once I'm in the parking lot I dial Alex's number and make my way to the car. It rings a few times, and on the third rings cuts off and goes to voicemail. He ignored my call. I hear his greeting telling me to leave him a message, and then the beep.
"Hey babe it's just me. Mr. Blumm is out today, and Mrs. Crenshaw let me leave for the last hour. I was hoping that your parents might let you drag yourself away from your sister and the family activities to hang out with me for a little. Anyway I guess I'll just stop by and take the risk of having to face your mom's wrath. It will be worth it if we can have some alone time. Love you. See you soon." I hang my phone up and hop into my car and head over to Alex's house.
As I pull up to his driveway I notice there's a shiny red convertible in the driveway. Looks like Alex's parents got Kristy a new car for getting into Julliard.
I'm about to get out when I see the front door open, and out of it comes Alex. I smile because he's wearing the biggest smile of his own, and I think it's because he must have gotten my message and snuck away to come out and meet me.
Then I realize what it really is. Coming out the door after him, with her fingers twined through his, is a tall leggy blonde who definitely is not his petite brunette sister. Alex hasn't even noticed that I'm there.
They make their way to his truck, but don't get much further than that as Alex pushes blondie up against the driver's side door of his truck and starts making out with her. They're obviously very focused on what they're doing because they still haven't noticed I'm there.
They break away from each other so she can say something to him, and then turn and run back toward the house; Alex smacking blondies ass as she walks in the door. He then pauses and turns around staring straight at me.
It's almost comical how wide his eyes go when he realizes that I've seen everything that just happened, and I can literally see his Adam's apple bob as he swallows. He opens his mouth as if he's about to say something, but then closes it stupidly.
I've seen enough, and at this point I'm not even sad, just angry, and upset that I fell for his lie for so long. So instead of getting out of the car and causing a big scene that wouldn't change a thing I roll down my passenger side window, yell out "Hope she was worth it." And drive away.
I stop at the nearest pay phone, thankful that we still have a few hanging around, and even more thankful that it has a phonebook attached. Quickly I scan through the yellow book until I find the name I'm searching for, and dial the phone number.
He picks up on the first ring, and his voice is a balm to my anger. "Cavin Blumm." He says formally. I note that the song "Cowboys and Angels" is playing in the background, and I'm not surprised one bit that he's a country music fan.
"Cavin it's Phoebe. Can I come see you?"