Day 24: Conspireshipping (Ryou/Yami Bakura/Marik/Yami Marik) - "Ugly Christmas Sweaters"

A/N: Like the last one, I combined two of the remaining prompts for this: Ugly sweaters and Exchanging gifts. What's the point of making your own rules if you can't break them? ;)

Yami Marik name-of-the-day: Nasir!

~ o ~ o ~ o ~

Ryou burst into the room. "I have presents!"

Excited shouts rang out, and Marik laughed as he spoke over the other two. "Yes, we can see that. How can you even see where you're going?" He lifted a couple of the boxes off Ryou's armful, revealing a bright smile behind them.

"I couldn't. But I figured there are enough people in here that someone would have caught me if I tripped."

"Damn right. Someone's gotta save the presents." Nasir grinned wickedly and swiped the remaining gifts out of Ryou's hands, but still pecked a kiss to his playful pout before hauling the gifts to the table. "What'd you get us?"

Ryou watched the others curiously poke at the wrapping paper. "Who says they're presents for you?"

"The fact that you know better than to tease us with gifts that aren't for us." Bakura wrapped an arm around Ryou's waist and gave him a quick squeeze in greeting. "What'd you get us?"

Ryou clapped in excitement. "You'll have to open them and see! Let's see…" He passed out a box to each of them, before setting the last one on his lap and staring at the others expectantly.

Marik looked up from tracing the designs on his wrapping paper as Ryou sat down. "Wait, did you get a gift for yourself? Have you no faith in us?"

"That's debateable." Ryou winked. "But yes, this one's for me. It had to be a matching set, you know."

Marik's next question was cut off by a loud cackle from Nasir, who had torn right into his gift with his usual enthusiasm while they spoke. Marik and Bakura got up to peer over his shoulders and see what had him in hysterics.

Marik raised an eyebrow and glanced up at Ryou. "…I have questions."

Nasir was already squeezing the sweater on over his hair. "This is great. Who the hell even makes shit like this?!" He held out the bottom of the sweater to stare down at the front, which featured the cartoonish mangled corpse of a pudgy old woman with tightly curled hair, dressed in a ruffled sleeping gown and surrounded by bloody hoofprints and sleigh tracks.

Bakura poked at the glittery blood pooled around the woman. "Ryou, you are seriously messed up. It's great."

Ryou beamed. "Thank you." He turned to Marik, who had gone from confused to shaking his head in fond exasperation as Bakura turned to tear into his own package. "It's designed after a Christmas song, actually. 'Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer'. It's a delightful little ditty."

Bakura victoriously held up his own sweater, which was absolutely decked out in a horribly clashing assortment of sequins, rhinestones, and glitter. "This thing is the ugliest pile of shiny crap I think I've ever seen."

Ryou laughed. "That's the point! I got you the one with the most bling I could find so you can flaunt your treasure like a proper King of Thieves."

There was a short scuffle as Bakura wrestled the shirt over his head, and Marik laughed at the sight. "He looks like a lopsided disco ball."

Bakura scoffed and ran his hands over his glittery chest with a wide smirk. "Fuck off. This is now my most precious treasure."

Nasir snuck up behind him and slid arms around his glittery waist. "Aw, but aren't we…?"

Bakura but him off. "Shut your damn face, you're not getting any of that stupid sappy crap from me this time, don't even bother." Despite his words, Bakura settled comfortably back onto Nasir's chest and gave one of the arms around his waist a squeeze as he spoke. "C'mon, Marik, open yours, I want to see what kind of monstrosity you've got."

"Yeah, yeah." Marik turned to his own gift and lifted it out of the box to gales of laughter from the other two. Marik turned to Ryou with a sardonic expression. "A little short, isn't it?"

Ryou couldn't hold back his laughter anymore. "It's Battle City sized! We miss the easy access to your abs!"

"Flattering, but…" The group's laughter got louder as Marik put his arm through the extra cutout at the front of the sparkly bundle of fuzz in his arms. "Is this really necessary?"

"Yes." Bakura and Nasir grinned and high-fived themselves, and Marik rolled his eyes so hard they looked about ready to disappear into his head permanently.

Nasir grinned wolfishly. "C'mon, put it on."

"Yeah, we'll make sure to keep you warm if you need it."

Marik adopted a haughty air and held out the garment between two fingers. He sniffed. "I don't know, it's not my colour."

He felt something latch onto his arm and turned to a laughing Ryou. "But it's Christmas colours! It's festive! Here, I'll put mine on, too."

The fact that he had wrapped his own gift didn't go unnoticed or unteased, but Ryou just insisted that it was important to do these things properly. He gleefully ripped the paper to bits and pulled his sweater over his head.

Nasir smiled at the picture. "Hey, it's that movie you like!"

Ryou beamed. "Yep. Nightmare Before Christmas never gets old." It was a horribly gaudy version of the print, really, all the better to match his boyfriends.

The campaign to get Marik out of his shirt wasn't going so well, so Ryou sauntered over to help by distracting Marik with kisses. In short order, Nasir was bolting away with Marik's shirt in hand, leaving a smirking Bakura to hold out the new sweater to replace it. Marik finally capitulated with a laugh and got himself dressed.

"This is actually really soft."

"Of course. I wouldn't get you something scratchy."

Nasir piled into them and pulled them both into one-armed hugs. "Gotta test out the softness, now. Let's see…." He nuzzled into Marik's shoulder. "Not bad. C'mon, I need a second opinion, get in here."

It didn't take long for the group to fall into a sort of lopsided group cuddle, as they poked and prodded at their new outfits and played 'who can steal the most kisses'. Ryou won. Again. Bakura complained. Again. Eventually they settled themselves on the couch, and Ryou victoriously took a selfie of the group in their new bling.

The picture on their Christmas card was particularly interesting that year, and Ryou wouldn't have it any other way.

~ o ~ o ~ o ~

A/N: Does anyone consider 1k a "drabble"? ...whatever, consider it a bonus! ;)

That's it! I hope you enjoyed this madness, and found at least a few pairings that suited you. I enjoyed writing these, and may do another collection at some point.

If you'd like to suggest a pairing and prompt (of any kind, not just winter themes), I'd welcome it! :D Either leave a comment here, or send me an ask on Tumblr, and I'll do my best to rise to the challenge!