Disclaimer: All original characters and storylines are property of E.L. James. No copyright infringement intended.
So you get a little peek into Cavin's mind during this chapter. Hope you all enjoy.
"Honey I'm home!" I hear my Aunt Mia exclaim as she makes her way into the front room.
"And she brought a guest!" Aunt Kate chimes in behind her.
I smile because shopping trips with these two, and my mom are always the best. Aunt Mia has a killer fashion sense, Aunt Kate isn't afraid to tell you what something really looks like on, and mom keeps me from buying things that my dad wouldn't approve of.
"Who's ready for a completely ass hole boy free shopping trip?" Mia sings out in an excited voice. She's always looking for an excuse to go to the mall, even if that excuse is her only niece's boyfriend cheating on her and breaking her heart. To Mia, shopping is the cure for everything.
"Oh honey are you alright?" My more sensitive Aunt Kate asks as she takes in my tear stained face.
"Yeah I'm fine, just had to get the tears out of my system." I say smiling at the both of them.
"Are you sure sweetie? We can do this tomorrow if you would rather." Shockingly enough it is Aunt Mia to suggest this. Obviously she understands how heartbreaking the situation really is.
"Really guys I'm fine. Just give me a half hour to fix myself up and then we can head out." Shopping really does sound fun, and a few hours without having to think about boys, any of them, should do me some good.
"Alright, we'll be down here when you're ready." Mom tells me, and I make my way up to my room.
I check my phone which I had left on the charger, and see that I have one new text message.
I miss you so much already. And I'm really going to miss you in class today. I can't help but smile at the kind words Cavin has sent me. He really is one of a kind.
I miss you too. Can't wait to see you again. I quickly type back, and hit the send button. It really is nice to know that he's thinking about me.
I get ready for my day out, making sure that I don't wear anything that's too difficult to get out of. If Mia has it her way I'll be leaving with half the mall. Which means a lot of dressing, and undressing.
I decide not to do my make-up, because after all I am supposed to be upset, and what girl who has just gone through a break up feels happy enough to make herself up.
"Alright, I'm ready." I say as I come back downstairs. My mom and aunts are waiting for me on the couch, all of them looking flawless. I begin to question my decision to not wear any make-up.
It's too late though to run upstairs and throw some mascara on. Mia has us out the door and in the car within seconds. I guess I'll just have them do it at the M.A.C counter, I need new makeup anyway.
"Phebs I wish I could be as naturally gorgeous as you are!" Aunt Kate whines from the back seat where her, and Mia are seated. I pull down the sun visor, and check my reflection in its mirror.
I guess I don't look too bad considering I've just gone through a crying spell, and I'm not wearing any foundation. I have my mom's blue eyes, and my dad's reddish brown, almost bronze colored hair. I can see my mom's cheekbones in my slender face, but my father's nose, just more feminine. I believe that I've gotten the best of both their traits, and usually I consider myself attractive, but since seeing Alex with the blonde tramp I've been wondering what it is she has that I don't.
"She's right honey. Even as a baby you were pretty. Now you're just drop dead, outta this world gorgeous." Aunt Mia chimed in.
"Thanks guys." I say shyly, as we pull into the nearby mall. It's within walking distance of our house, but there's no way we would be able to make it back without a car. Not after a full day of shopping.
"Alright guys. I'm going to hit the M.A.C store first, and let them sell me an outrageous amount of make-up, will you head to Abercrombie and start looking around for me?" I asked. I really wanted to talk to Cavin a little bit, and the only way I would be able to do that is if I distracted them.
"Of course!" Mia said pulling my mom and Kate along with her.
"Oh and please for the love of all that is Holy. Don't pick out anything that has that stupid moose front and center!" I tell them as we make our way to the mall entrance.
"Have a little faith honey." Mia says with a roll of her eyes. I laugh because I know she hates that damn moose as much as I do.
"See you guys soon." I say, and break away from them in the direction of the M.A.C store. As soon as they can't see me anymore I take out my phone and check my messages, sure enough I have a new one. I can't stop thinking about last night. You are so beautiful. I don't know if I can go a whole weekend without seeing you. Isn't there anything we can do?
I quickly type out my response. Trust me that's the only thing that's been on my mind all morning long! Can we please rewind the clock? I'll see if there's anyway we can sneak away for an evening. No promises though.
I can't help but get butterflies reading his texts to me, but I also have an anxious knot in my stomach. There is no way Cavin and I will be able to sneak around forever, and eventually the truth is going to get out there. I know when that happens that all hell is going to break loose. I just hope that it's after graduation, when I am no longer a student of his.
My phone vibrates again, and I read the message. I've gotta go baby, I have a meeting to attend during my prep period. I will text you when I can though.
I feel a stab of disappointment, but quickly banish it. Even if I don't hear from Cavin for the rest of the day I'm going to have fun, and be happy.
"Hey what can I help you with?" The M.A.C salesgirl asks in an overfriendly voice when I enter the store.
"Well the foundation that I have right now I bought over winter, and now that it's starting to warm up a little more I've been getting some color, so I just need to purchase some new make-up that works with my skin tone now."
"Alright well let's try a few out and see which would work best for you."
For the next hour she goes through her whole sales pitch and talks me into buying everything that she uses on me…primer, foundation, powder, highlighter, eye shadow, eyeliner, mascara, and just about every other make-up product there is available, and I end up spending close to three hundred dollars on makeup alone.
"There you are! And jeez don't you look hot!" My Aunt Mia exclaims when I finally meet them at Abercrombie. "Don't you ever check your phone?"
"Sorry, I was getting my make-up done. I thought it might be a little bit rude to be texting when the nice M.A.C lady was selling me all their products." I laugh but look at my phone anyway. Sure enough one new text message from Aunt Mia.
"Alright, well we've found the only decent articles of clothing in this store, so hurry and try them on so we can head over to Hollister. I saw the cutest shirt when we passed their window, and it would look so awesome on you!"
I take the clothes that they hold out for me, they have been busy in the past hour. Walking into the dressing room I check the message from Aunt Mia.
Alright girly, you and I are going to have a little talk…no girl is this chill after a breakup…even me. Don't worry, you and I will find a very private place, and you can tell me all about whatever boy it is that you are seeing.
Oh crap! I should have known that Mia would pick up on that. She's incredibly perceptive when it comes to those types of things. I swear she's part hound dog when she wants a new piece of gossip.
Instead of texting her back I decide to just try on the clothes that my family has picked out for me. Most of them are really cute, except for a few exceptions that I know my mom as chosen just to appease my dad.
"No." I say handing my mom the pile of clothes that I had decided against, and then give Aunt Mia the clothes that I want to keep. "Yes." I say giving her a look that tells her that I will talk to her about it, but not right now. She nods, and walks up to the cash register to pay.
What have I gotten myself into now?
Cavin's POV:
As always I'm thinking about her. Missing her, thinking about the way her eyes light up when she smiles at me, or how my name dances off her tongue, and now I have something even further to distract me, the thought of her, beautiful, naked, and caught in the throes of passion with me. I can feel myself getting hard, so I immediately think of something different. It wouldn't do to get a raging hard on in a room full of my colleagues and friends.
"What do you think Cavin?" The Dean of our fine school asks, and I feel like an errant child. I hadn't heard a word of the question he had asked me.
"Sorry sir, what was that? I was up late last night reading over some essays, and I haven't quite had enough coffee." I hope he isn't too angry at me, or my lame excuse. This is the man that I owe everything to. He's the reason I got into teaching, the reason I had doubled my course load through college, and took classes during the summer so I could graduate two years early. He's the reason I had gotten this job in the first place.
He simply smiles and says, "How would you like to hand out the diplomas this year at graduation? All the kids seem so fond of you, and I believe you would act as an inspiration of sorts for them."
"I would be honored sir." I say with a smile. There is nothing I would love more than to hand my beautiful Phoebe her ticket to being with me without any strings attached.
"It's settled then! And that was our last order of business for this meeting. You are all free to go." Mr. Cromwell says, and quickly comes to intercept me as I'm walking out of the room.
"Cavin are you alright? You've seemed somewhat distracted lately. Anything that I can help with?" He asks me.
"Thank you Charlie, but no. I've just been having difficulties sleeping lately. I think it's because I'm drinking so much coffee during the day that I can't fall asleep at night. It's a vicious cycle, but I'll be back to normal soon." This man is like a father to me, and I hate lying to him, but I couldn't exactly tell him that I was so tired and distracted because I stayed up all night having illegal sex with a student.
"Alright Cavin, but if there's anything you need to talk to me about you know my door is always open, especially for you."
I feel terrible keeping things from him, but I have no other choice. "Alright sir." I say, and then quickly leave the room. I am just now beginning to realize how difficult this must be for Phoebe.
Thinking about her makes me miss her again, and no matter how guilty I may feel about my actions, I can't help but feel that they are right. I have never felt this way for a woman in my life, even my somewhat serious girlfriends throughout high school and college couldn't compare to how I feel about Phoebe.
My cell phone pings, and immediately my heart begins to race. I smile as the words Fee flash across the screen. I know it's not exactly how you would usually spell it, but I figure I am already taking a huge risk texting her at all. I don't want to add suspicion by using her real name.
I open my messages and read the latest one she sent me. I can't believe that I would actually rather be in school right now than out shopping! But I miss you so much. I hope I didn't interrupt your meeting, if I did I'm really sorry. I just can't wait to hear from you or see you again.
I smile at her words because I feel the exact same way. I just want to be near her, know that she's alright. I actually just wrapped up my meeting, so no interruption. I miss you too, and you could always come to school after you are done shopping. You might be able to make it for English.
I know it's a long shot, but a part of me really hopes that I'll see her today.
Of course I have no such luck. Sorry, but my Aunt Mia already suspects something, if I ditch shopping to go to school, she'll really know something is up. Don't worry I don't think that she realizes that I'm having an affair with my English teacher, but she does know that I've moved on from Alex already. It looks like we're both going to have to suffer today.
My heart sinks as I read her message. Of course I don't want to create any suspicion, but I can't help but want to see Phoebe either, not to mention I'm going to have to see her scum bag of an ex boy-friend. I'm not quite sure how I'm going to handle that just yet. I'm thinking some form of public humiliation. It shouldn't be too hard considering he's as dumb as a post. Something tells me now that Phoebe is out of the picture his grades are going to quickly plummet to failing, and I'm going to take great joy in it.
I type out a response to Phoebe letting her know that I need to get some things ready for class so I will probably be busy until at least lunch, but I'll text her when I get a chance. I put my phone in my desk drawer so I won't be distracted by it or tempted to text Phoebe when I should be working. Then I being grading the papers that I failed to do last night because I was with Phoebe.
Time passed quickly and before I knew it, lunchtime was upon me. I had in fact embarrassed Alex simply by using the Socratic Method of questioning about a book we were reading in class. It was clear to me that he had only watched the movie, and not read the book, and when I pointed that fact out to him and asked if he was intentionally being stupid or if he just couldn't help it, he started tearing up, and he stormed out of the room like the child he was. I wasn't exactly sure what Phoebe saw in him, but I was glad that she was with me now, and not him.
Hello beautiful, I just wanted to let you know that I am thinking about you, and I can't wait until I can see your smiling face again.
I hit the send button, and set my phone in my desk. I make my way to the staff room so I can heat up my lunch, and then I make my way back to my classroom. Pulling my phone out I see that I have a new message from Phoebe.
I just about spit my half chewed leftover Chinese food when I open my messages. There is a picture of Phoebe posing in a ridiculous sort of way, but she has the most beautiful smile on her face, and it's clear that she's having a good time. It really is breathtaking how gorgeous she is.
You are absolutely stunning! But I wouldn't advise sending pictures of yourself during school hours. Thankfully I'm alone right now, so I can enjoy it. I don't want to scold her like a child, because I really do love the fact that she sent me the picture, but I also really don't want to get caught.
She text me back quickly, and I find her reply touching. That's the first and the last time that I will I promise. I know that you always eat lunch alone in your classroom though, unless of course I'm in there with you helping you grade papers. I can't wait to spend even more lunches with you now.
We continue our conversation until the end of lunch. I glance at the picture one more time right before my next class starts, and then I lock my phone safely away in my desk drawer.
Throughout the rest of the day my mind continually drifts back to Phoebe. It is then that I realize that I am falling in love with her. She is my student, and I am five years her elder, but none of that matters. I know that we can get into a lot of trouble for what we are doing, but I don't care. All that matters is her and her happiness now. It doesn't matter how long it takes, but one day her and I will be able to be together without sneaking around, and that will be the day that my life truly begins.
.