Don't Leave Me Alone
A/N: Heya! If you're interested, please read Not a Fairy Tale Dream for the nightmare sequence that's supposed to be at the beginning!
Ruby wakes up with her scream still choking in her throat.
Fragments of her dream still linger underneath her eyelids. She doesn't dare blink. With eyes wide and terror-stricken, she looks around, frantic, expecting to see the same horrors chasing her, surrounding her.
Only to find out that she is back in one of the houses at Brunswick. Safe.
Or at least as safe as she could possibly be. Is anywhere safe anymore?
Eventually the nightmare fades away until all that's left is exhaustion. She can't remember what she saw that shook her so much but she remembers what she felt. What she still feels.
She feels it in the way her heart beats as if she was being chased, in the way her eyes keep searching for something just lurking in the corner of her vision, in the way her whole body winds up like a coil ready to spring into action.
The nightmare may be forgotten but the feeling never truly goes away.
In the quiet of the morning there are no terrified shrieks, only the out of pace beating of her heart and her own stifled scream.
It's not her first nightmare and it won't certainly be her last.
And just like always she wills herself to wake up. She forces herself to move.
She has to keep moving.
She moves almost mechanically. Get up. Get herself together. Get everyone else up.
She picks up a bottle that's rolled away on the floor. Empty. Which isn't the same feeling she gets in chest when she sees her uncle wallow in alcohol, drowning himself and his issues like it's the only way he knows how to cope.
"Uncle Qrow. Come on... Wake up." She shakes him by the shoulder.
"Leave me alone..." He grumbles and refuses to wake up.
"Hngh, we overslept." She shakes him harder. He mumbles something incoherent. It doesn't matter what he said, it's a rejection all the same as he pushes her away.
He keeps pushing other people away.
She hates this. She hates seeing her uncle like this, her hero breaking down like this. She hates how he keeps drinking bottle after bottle as if they didn't need him sober.
She hates it all so much that she is filled to the brim with it. Her own bottle of emotions threatening to spill.
She stares at the bottle until she is so mad that it shakes—
Until it breaks.
"...Hngh? What?" Her uncle finally wakes up.
And sees the damage that's been done.
"Oh, right... Sunrise." He takes in ragged breaths. The same shaky breaths that Ruby had when she woke up. And all of a sudden, she felt all that anger ebb away.
Until all that's left is understanding... and sadness at what she understood.
She hates seeing him hurt. She hates that he thinks he's alone in this. She hates how he's convinced himself that he can't open up to them.
For as much as Ruby hates this, she knows that Uncle Qrow hates this more.
"You know, you can talk to me about stuff. Yang too." She offers along with the tender embrace.
"Let's just get out of here." He pats her back. Neither accepting her offer nor returning the embrace.
This too is another bottle.
Maybe if the circumstances were different, they would have opened up that bottle. Just maybe. Hopefully.
But for now they don't. They're too tired to deal with anything really.
And so they just keep themselves in bottles.
Weiss is the last one to get up and by then everyone else is out of the room except for Ruby who is still trying to wake her up.
"Weiss, come oooooon." She pulls off the blanket and yes, Weiss looks cute when she curls up just a bit but she looks more annoying the longer she stays asleep. "Don't make me pull out the whistle."
The threat has Weiss shoot up so fast, it made Ruby wonder if she was even asleep in the first place.
"Dont. You. Dare." She glares at her with squinted eyes. Her tone matched her scowl, truly she was awake now that she wore her signature scowl.
"Good morning to you too." Ruby starts to fold the blanket, unaffected and used to morning grouch Weiss.
"Ugh, hardly." She drops her glare in favor of rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.
It's then that Ruby notices the eyebags that weren't there yesterday.
"How was your sleep?" She asks and she tries not to think of her own disturbed sleep. This isn't about her right now. This is about Weiss first. "You don't look so good."
"Excuse you, I never look anything less than—" She yawns. "...Elegant."
"Yeah, you're always pretty," Ruby answers without missing a beat and without noticing the stutter she did to Weiss. Maybe if she wasn't so tired, she would have noticed her partner's cheeks color just a bit redder. "But you look pretty tired."
"T-That's because I am tired." She flinches slightly at her own stammer, still flustered. But it doesn't last long since the exhaustion kicks in now that she mentioned it. "I'm really really tired."
"Well it's a good thing that we're leaving already," She offers with a small smile and a hand on her shoulder. "You can rest more on the ride to Argus, okay?"
For a moment, there is silence. Hesitation. Weiss has the same pensive look she had on yesterday. She looks like she has something to say.
"Help me put on my scarf?"
Ruby wonders if that's what she really wanted to ask but she doesn't ask otherwise.
"Sure. Where'd you put it?" She says instead, her eyes already scanning the room for the red garment.
"On top of my suitcase by the couch." Weiss starts to comb her hair with her fingers in an effort to fix her hair without a comb. In the back of Ruby's mind she wonders why her partner even bothers when she looks beautiful already.
She spots the scarf neatly folded because of course Weiss has to be neat and organized about everything. When she picks it up, she's somewhat surprised at the slight weight of it. It always felt as if it weighed nothing whenever she played with the ends while Weiss was wearing it which earned her a light scolding by the way.
"So... uhhh?" Ruby awkwardly fiddles with the cloth between her fingers, unsure on what to do next.
"Well?" Weiss raises an eyebrow at her expectantly. "Get on with it. It's not that hard."
If it's not that hard then why was she the one doing this and not her instead?
There's a comment about how this isn't Atlas and how she doesn't have servants here to pick up her slack but Ruby holds her tongue. That was too soon and too mean even for her. She must be tired too.
So she swallowed her grumblings and did what she was told. She carefully wraps the scarf around Weiss' neck. And then she wraps it a second time. She thinks that maybe this is the part where she's supposed to tie a knot? She doesn't know. She ties the knot anyways. Then she uhh, she wraps it around for good measure. That should do it.
Yep, as expected. It doesn't look right.
"You're doing it wrong." Weiss' hands suddenly hold hers to stop her from doing a second knot. Her scowl looks ten times more disappointed up close. Huh, she never realized they were this close all this time. And of course she could feel the judgement full force this close.
"What did you expect? How am I supposed to know how to do it right?" Ruby defends herself with a pout.
"You have your own garment." Her eyes lock on her signature red garment.
"Why do you think my cloak is a clip-on?" She rolls her shoulder just to show her point.
Point taken, Weiss lets out a long sigh.
"This is how you do it. Watch." She orders and before Ruby has any chance to say otherwise— not that she would— she begins to redo the wrapping.
With her hands still holding Ruby's hands which are still holding the scarf.
It's a bit awkward at first. Maybe even throughout the whole process. Since Weiss was determined to have Ruby's hands do everything, she has to tell her when to let go and which part to grasp and correct her each time she did it wrong. This would have been easier if Weiss just showed it with her own hands but Ruby doesn't want her partner to let go of her hands just yet.
When Weiss asked her to watch, Ruby did. It just so happens that she's just paying attention to everything else at the same time. She watches as Weiss' hands meticulously lead her through the technique. She watches and consolidates the feeling of rough calluses and soft fabric, both warm and comforting to touch.
She watches until her eyes trail upwards the slender neck. She sees her lips dry from the cold and tries not to think of how much she wants to warm them up. She sees the way her lower lip is pulled back and she almost misses it if only she wasn't this close to spot it. She sees her eyes focused on the task and unaware of being watched. Her eyes which are tired but still blue and beautiful.
She watches until she forgets what she's supposed to be watching for.
She's pretty sure that she'll forget how to do the scarf thing again but she'll never forget the things she's seen.
"There. Now you'll know how to do it next time."
Next time. Ruby likes the sound of that.
It sounds like a promise.
A promise that there will be a next time.
"Promise me you won't get mad if I mess it up again?"
Ruby never realized it before but this close, she thinks that Weiss has the prettiest eyes she's ever seen.
"Ruby... What color are your eyes?"
The out of nowhere question takes her by surprise. Maybe it's because she's been asked about her eyes more so than usual. Maybe it's because she's asked the same questions herself. But for whatever reason and for however much is left of her already fading will, she finds enough to croak out an answer.
"They're... silver."
She hears the sharp gasp but she's too far gone to comprehend what that means.
"Do you have any family? Friends?"
"...What?"
She hears the groans of the Grimm, closing in on them, slowly but surely to put them out of their misery. She hears them, too many of them. She hears them coming for her death. No, not death, but release. Release from everything. No, wait. Isn't that just the same? She doesn't know anymore.
She's finding it difficult to think when all she could think about is how the Grimm are already here and she thinks that she's forgetting something... something important.
"Don't think about them."
She hears the soothing voice silence her fears or what her fears would be if she cared enough. She doesn't know anymore. All she knows is she's so tired. But some small dying part of her also knows that she has to do something.
She doesn't know what that something is but the voice sounds like they know what they're doing and so she latches onto that.
"Think about the people who love you. Focus on the thought of them, the way they make you feel... Focus."
She thinks about her family. She thinks of her dad who's back on Patch waiting for her to come home with Zwei and food served with puns. She thinks of her Uncle Qrow who is sometimes a mess but he's still her hero who taught her what it was like to be a huntress.
She thinks about her friends whom she left behind. She thinks of Team JNR and how they're doing. She thinks of Ren's quiet yet constant support, wise beyond his years and amazing at making pancakes. She thinks of Nora's crazy antics and her loud ways of expressing affection or joy, sometimes both at the same time. She thinks of Jaune who's always trying his best and how he pushes her to do her best too.
She thinks about the people who got dragged into this journey yet somehow chose to come along. She thinks of Maria who no one really expected her to join them but here she is, wise as much as she is sassy, getting them to move when they frozen in fear. She thinks of Oscar who went from just farmboy to farmboy with an old wizard in his head, and how he reminds him of herself, inexperienced and young and full of ambition.
"Life is beautiful."
She thinks about her team. She thinks of Blake who lends her books to read and stays in the room no matter how much she dislikes Zwei. She thinks of how she fights for what she believes in and she believes in what is right. She thinks of her sister Yang who dishes out punches as many as she serves punchlines. She thinks of how her sister has always been there for her, never leaving her side especially when things got tough. She thinks of how there is no one else in this world she'd rather have as her sister.
She thinks about her partner. She thinks of Weiss who is sometimes prickly but deep down is actually a softie. She thinks of how sometimes she buries how much she cares underneath layers of scoffs and haughty remarks because she's too proud to show affection. She thinks of how much she's changed because of them and how much she's changed them as well, Ruby especially.
She thinks about her best friend. She thinks of Weiss who denies this fact yet goes out of her way to get her coffee she never asked but needed, which only proves Ruby's point. She thinks of how she would follow her anyways with only mild complaining. She thinks of how her smirk softens to a smile when she thinks she isn't looking. She thinks of how coincidentally she only notices that happen around her.
She thinks of how she would never hug first but she would always hug her back. She thinks of how she would always have her back.
She thinks of how truly lucky she was to have Weiss as her partner and her best friend.
"It is precious."
She thinks about the people who didn't make it. She thinks of Penny, how cheerful she was and how she was already ready and willing to help a friend. She thinks of Pyrrha, how amazing she was and how earnest she was to meet a challenge. She thinks of her mom, how she was a supermom who could go out and be a hero helping people then go home and be the best mom that there ever was.
She thinks about how they were gone too soon. She thinks about how much she doesn't want to lose any more precious people too soon.
She thinks about how much she loves these people and how much she is loved in return.
"And it must be protected."
She thinks about just how much she wants to protect them.
She thinks that she has to protect them.
She will protect them.
Silver eyes glow bright until the darkness is banished by her light.
A/N: Please read 'Not a Fairy Tale Dream' for the nightmare sequence oneshot :)
Initially, I wrote the nightmare sequence as part of this piece but it felt too long and not much whiterose content in it so I decided to post it as a separate piece. I do hope that you'd still give it a chance. Thank you!
Wowsers. There's a lot to unpack in this episode.
What shook me the most was that scene between Ruby and Qrow. This is Ruby, the girl who is full of love and who rarely expresses anger at anything other than the enemies, actually gets so mad and frustrated that she lashes out by throwing that bottle to pieces. She's so mad and yet she still doesn't direct that anger to her struggling uncle. Instead she even embraces him and offers support. That was the most powerful moment in the episode for me.
The part with the well was absolutely amazing too. Ruby's instant regret once she dropped the relic and how she stood her ground against her team to get it back. I was holding my breath, worried that the team would let her go down alone but it was nice that despite their apathy, they went with her. They may abandon the cause but they are not abandoning their leader. That was perfectly executed and so it felt right to not write about that scene anymore. I still love it though!
As much as I love Weiss in this episode, I felt that Ruby deserved this chapter. And I really really love Weiss in the episode (and in general of course). I love how vindictive she was and burnt the whole house down. And I love how far she's grown as a character to actually apologize first. I might revisit this in another chapter but let it be known that I truly love Weiss.
Hey so uh, quick questions. Since Weiss burned those Apathy grimms, did they die? If they did, does that mean that she could summon them now? If she could, then could she direct their powers as in she could specifically target people with apathy syndrome which means she and comrades are unaffected? Because if the answer to all of this is yes then holy shit.