The Best Thing

It was a conflicted man I watched leave my office, a very conflicted man. I'd hoped from the start that before this was over Jim would man up and do what he needed to do, and I was starting to believe he would. Odd as it would sound to anyone who'd ever had dealings with Dandy in the past, I had a feeling Jim really did want his son. I also knew he wasn't going to easily admit that to anyone, including himself. I guess that was an understandable way to feel; I'm sure the desire to keep Jack had taken Dandy by surprise, he may not even have recognized it for what it was yet. One thing I was confident of, however, was that if Jim did decide to run, it wouldn't be easy for him.

Even though there were some things that needed my attention at the saloon, I decided to make them wait a little longer and go home for a bit. Doralice was still put out by Jim and what he'd done to Jack, but her attitude had softened some since I'd told her of how relatively easy it'd been to get Dandy back. Suspecting what I did now, I just had to talk to her.

Making sure there was nothing pressing at the saloon I needed to deal with, I went back to the house and found Doralice doing some cleaning. "I take it the meeting didn't go well?" she said as soon as she saw me.

"What makes you say that?"

"Jack came in about twenty minutes ago, alone. He didn't look happy." I could tell that wasn't helping Dandy any.

"Where is he now?" I asked.

"With Bret. He came in a few minutes after Jack did and offered to take him for a ride. Jack was onlt too happy to go."

"You know, for a man who's never talked much about having a family, he's really good at this." My brother has always maintained he wouldn't marry until he was 38 and I don't think he was ever serious about those twelve little Mavericks he promised Pappy. Bret's always appeared to be very happy as a bachelor so it's always been hard for me to imagine him as a family man. Even now he doesn't seem to be in a hurry to move things forward with his Lady Love. He handled Maudie and Belle just fine, however, and he seemed to have a way with Jack too. I guess he'll have plenty of practice if he ever does get around to settling down.

Doralice smiled. "Jack's easy once he opens up to you." Her face clouded some. "I wish someone else could experience that."

"I'm doing my best to move it along."

"I know you are. Unfortunately, you can't make someone care about another person. Where is he anyway?"

"Taking a walk; said he needed to think."

"I'll bet he does. I wish . . . I don't know, Bart. I just can't imagine anyone being willing to give their child up. Jack doesn't deserve that. He needs to know someone loves him."

"I agree, and I think he will before this is over."

"You really believe that?"

I nodded. "Yes, I do. I don't think making the decision to leave him here was easy for Jim. I think he's having an even harder time with it now. Speaking of children, where are ours?"

Doralice broke into a grin. "Sleeping."

I couldn't hide my surprise. "Both of them?"

"Both of them."

"At the same time?"

"At the same time."

I sat down on the sofa, my desire to talk about Dandy vanishing in light of the phenomenon that my girls could actually coordinate their sleep. "That's amazing."

"It's certainly made things easier today," she said as she went about her cleaning.

I leaned back and closed my eyes. "It's so quiet."

Doralice sighed contentedly. "Isn't it?"

"I feel like we should take advantage of this somehow but I'm not sure what to do."

Doralice chuckled. "I know what you mean." A minute passed with no sound other than Doralice dusting, then she called my name.

I lifted my head. "Huh?"

"Did you really mean that? About taking advantage of the quiet."

"Of course; between Jack and the girls it hasn't been this quiet in months."

"What did you have in mind?"

"Oh, I don't know. It'd almost be nice just to sit here."

Doralice crossed the room and sat down beside me, taking my hand in hers. "That's one option, but you look a little tired."

"Not really."

"You do. I think you need a nap."

I looked at my wife in confusion. "I'm fine. I've actually been sleepin' pretty good since Maudie's decided she doesn't have to scream all night every night. And last night . . . ."

"Bart," Doralice cut in. She took my face in her hands and looked me in the eye. "You look tired. I think you should lie down." She smiled at me coyly. "In fact, why don't we both go lay down?"

"Oh," I said softly realizing what kind of nap she was suggesting and feeling stupid that I hadn't thought of that before. "Really?" It had been months since I'd been with my wife, and now that she'd mentioned it I was filled with the desire to have every inch of her against me again.

"Jack's not here. The girls are asleep." She picked up my hand and brushed her lips across my fingers, her eyes telling me her desire was just as strong as mine.

My grin now matched hers. "I'm feeling a little tired at that."

"I thought so."

Taking my hand, Doralice pulled me up and led me back to the bedroom. I'd no sooner shut the door than she threw herself in my arms and started kissing me hungrily. Before long we were on the bed and she was reminding me of just how delightful a woman could be. She was also making me marvel at the fact that I'd never really truly appreciated that delightfulness until I'd met her.

"I'd forgotten just how good you feel," I told her sometime later as she lay in my arms. Out of all the advice my father and uncle had bestowed on me before the girls were born, no one had bothered to tell me how hard it was going to be to get some time alone with my wife once there were little ones. It was nice to be reminded of just how much fun Doralice and I could have together.

"Likewise," Doralice said snuggling closer to me.

"So having twins hasn't made you want to stay away from me forever?" There had been a few times while she was giving birth and in the days immediately following I'd wondered if she'd ever let me touch her again.

Doralice laughed. "Not even close. We might even try this having a baby thing again one day. But I wouldn't mind if it stayed at just one next time."

"You'll get no arguments from me."

She chuckled but soon fell quiet and I wondered what she was thinking. I found out when she sighed and spoke again. "What did happen between James and Jack today?"

"I'm not really sure. I wasn't there for most of it; I thought they could use some time alone. They'd been together maybe fifteen minutes when I saw Jack run out and head this way. Did he say anything?"

She shook her head. "Not really; just that he'd seen his father. Bret came in soon after that and they left. What about James?"

"Nothing. He said they were unprepared for each other. He did seem a little rattled though. That's when he told me he needed to think."

"Why would he agree to take Jack if he didn't want him?"

"I've been asking myself that since this started. I think he does want him, or at least he wants to want him, but that also scares him to death. Does that make sense?"

Doralice nodded. "I think so. I guess I can understand him being uncertain, but Jack's his son. Surely that means something to him."

"I think it does." I also thought that Dandy was likely fighting tooth and nail against any paternal instinct he might be feeling, but I was sure he felt something.

"I just want to see him do right by Jack."

"I know. Me too."

Doralice sighed again and looked up at me. "We really should get up."

"Do we have to?"

"Before one of the girls start crying or Jack and Bret come back? Probably."

"I guess you're right." I gave her one last kiss before reluctantly rolling away from her and making myself get up. I dressed quickly promising myself we'd do this again, soon.

It's a good thing Doralice made us get up because we'd barely left the bedroom when the girls decided nap time was over for them too. Doralice was in the middle of feeding them when I heard Bret and Jack come back as well. Leaving Doralice with the girls, I went out to met my brother and found Jack looking more at ease than he'd been the last time I'd seen him.

"Have a nice ride?" I asked.

Jack nodded and Bret answered aloud. "We did. Went out and rode around on Ben's place a while." He then gave me a we-need-to-talk look.

I nodded slightly and addressed Jack. "Doralice is with the girls, but I bet if you go back there and ask she'll help you make some cookies when she's done with them."

Jack perked up some more. "Really?"

"Really. Why don't you go ask?"

Jack took off down the hall and I looked at my brother. "What?"

"Let's go outside," he said waving for me to follow him. We went out back and Bret sat down with a huff. "What happened with Dandy today?"

"I'm not sure, but neither one of them looked happy when it was over. Why? Did Jack say something?" Maybe I'd overestimated Dandy's ability to handle this and shouldn't have left them alone after all.

"Yeah; he thinks his daddy don't want him."

I crossed my arms and leaned back against the porch railing. "He's told me that before too."

"Well, do you think he does?" There was a definite note of hostilely in Bret's voice now. "He sure ain't been actin' like it."

There was that question again, and again, I tried my best to answer. "He hasn't said anything like that the past few days. But even if he was having doubts, he wouldn't tell Jack that."

"As much as it pains me to admit it, you're right. He's not that big a cad. But he wouldn't have to say it for Jack to pick up on it."

"I can't argue that, but, strange as it sounds, I think Dandy does want him."

Bret scoffed. "So what are you gonna do?"

"About what?"

"Buckley."

I shrugged. "Nothing yet. He's supposed to have dinner with us tonight. I'm hoping this meeting goes better than the first one did."

Bret pushed to his feet and came and stood beside me. "Do you think this is a good idea, Bart? I mean turning Jack over to Dandy."

I looked at my brother. "It doesn't matter what I think. There's nothin' I can do about it."

"But Dandy, with a kid? What kid deserves that?"

"He's his father, Bret. The deal was I keep him until his father came for him and his father's here. I get what you're sayin' but I can't keep him."

"Are you sure encouraging Dandy to take him is wise?"

I stared down at the porch and thought about that. Truth was, I'd already wondered that myself. I knew Dandy was undecided and I really believed there was part of him that wanted his boy, but what about that other part. Was I right to force this when Jim wasn't one hundred percent sure it was what he wanted? Was that fair to Jack? "I've thought about that," I told my brother. "But what else am I supposed to do? He's not my son to keep."

"Do you think Dandy can do this? Really?"

"He'll take care of him," I said; I was confident of that. If I had any doubts at all about that I wouldn't even consider sending Jack off with his father. If Jim took Jack, it would be for good and Jack would be well looked after.

"Yeah, I know he'll do that," Bret admitted softly. "Like I said, he's not that bad."

I wondered how painful it was for Bret to admit that but I didn't say anything.

"I mean, I know he'll make sure he goes to school and keep clothes on his back and make sure there's food in his belly but . . . do you think he'll love him?"

Bret had finally said what I hadn't been able to put into words myself. Did Jim love his son? At this point in time, I couldn't say, but I still had the feeling that he would if he would just let himself. "I think he can," I replied at length. "Maybe he doesn't love him as a son yet, but I think given enough time he will."

"Is that good enough? For Jack I mean."

"I don't know. I guess it'll have to be. I can't keep Jim from taking him, and I think Jack deserves the chance to know his father. The chance to have a relationship with him."

There was a smirk on Bret's face. "You're a good man Brother Bart. You have a lot more faith in him than I do."

"You think I'm wrong?"

Bret shrugged. "I hope you're not, but it is Dandy."

"You don't know him like I do."

"So you've said for years."

I ignored that comment. "Sure he can be selfish, but really, Bret, I think he wants this."

"Again, I hope your right, for Jack's sake."

"So do I." I hit Bret lightly on the arm. "Wanna stay for supper?"

Bret raised an eyebrow. "With Dandy? No, thank you. I'd like to keep my appetite tonight."

And just like that, my brother was back. "Fine, but at least wish me luck. I not only have the Buckley's to deal with but a wife who still isn't very happy with a certain James Buckley."

"Doralice always was a lady of taste." Bret stuck his hand out. "Good luck, little brother. You're gonna need it. I'll see you tomorrow."

After Bret left I stayed on the porch awhile and thought over everything Bret had just said. He'd raised a good point when he asked if simply taking care of Jack would be enough. Jack did need to know he was loved. Did I need to keep pushing Dandy to man up if he couldn't do that? Could Jim do that?

Feeling like I needed some time to myself as well I decided to take a little walk. I went inside to get my hat and heard Jack and Doralice in the kitchen laughing. Jack had grown on me, and I wanted what was best for him. I hoped I was smart enough to know what the best thing actually was.