Hi there Merlin fans, to my lovely readers, i hope that you are enjoying the story so far, I know I'm having fun writing it. And all the thanks goes to my lovely awesome followers, love you, I am so happy you all love reading this story of mine, you guys are just awesome! And I'm thinking about doing a sequel to this story, let me know you're thoughts on that. Happy holidays to you all, or Merry Christmas to you all and happy reading to ya ;-) :-) :-D
Within the heart.
The next morning Merlin opened his eyes to Quinn sleeping peacefully beside him, as if it was the most natural thing in the world.
She looked so peaceful as she slept, her head laying on his shoulder, his arm wrapped around her waist. Her long red hair luminated by the morning light streaming through the window, her alabaster skin seem to glow, the very sight of her took his breath away.
Merlin raised his hand and gently brushed a strand of hair out of her face, then caressed her cheek softly.
Her skin was soft and warm.
What was it about her that captivates him? Was it her childlike laughter that seemed to lift his spirits on the darkest day, or the childlike innocence she had around her? Or was it perhaps that she seem to fit in anywhere? Or maybe the warmth that he got from her? Why does he feel himself drawn to her? as if he was a moth being called by the flame, he simply couldn't resist the spell of her, of the magic that she possessed. He couldn't resist those beautifully stunning eyes that each time he looked at them his breath was stolen away.
Merlin had loved and lost, Freya was proof of that, but Quinn was completely different, the feeling that he felt for her seem to be stronger, and it both thrilled him and scared him. He had never had a feeling this strong, it almost burned like a red hot flame within his heart, and she was the cost for the flame, but he doesn't mind it.
But what did she feel for him? Does she feel the same? Does she feel the same heat, the same spark he feels when they touch? Was there the same intensity of the flame that burns within her heart that burns within his? What does she see when she looks at him? A companion? A friend? A lover? Or does it go deeper than that?
Merlin watched from the sidelines as the love bloom between Arthur and Guinevere from friendship, to love, and to much more, and he knew that it was true, but now that he is in the situation he had no idea what it could be.
'You love her'
Arthur's words echoed in his mind. Was that it? The strong feeling that he's feeling for her, the flame she gave to him? Was he truly falling in love? Or was it a love of friendship that was between them? No, Merlin knew that that was a lie. He knew the truth, he just doesn't want to admit it, doesn't want to fall any deeper than he already has.
What the Great Dragon had said was weighing heavily on his mind. Quinn didn't want to leave and he didn't want her to, in the end the decision is up to her.
He was broke out of his chain of thought by somebody clearing their throat. He turned to see Arthur and Gaius standing in the doorway to his room, both displaying equally amused Expressions on their faces.
Merlin scrambled from the bed, not waking Quinn surprisingly.
"This- it's not- this is not how it looks-"
Arthur raised an eyebrow, clearly amused. Gaius gave him a disapproving look.
"She- um- she couldn't sleep"
"Right, I'm sure there wasn't much sleeping" Arthur remarked.
"No- we-"
Arthur raised a hand. "I don't need details Merlin"
"No! We didn't do anything!" Said Merlin desperately. "All we did was talk and then go to sleep. I- we- she-" his voice drifted off into silence.
"She what?" Asked Arthur in that tone that made it clear that he wanted to know.
When Merlin gave no explanation, Arthur folded his arms across his chest, clearly saying that he wasn't going anywhere until Merlin told him what was on his mind. He truly was a pratt at times.
Merlin glanced over at the still sleeping Quinn. "I don't think she feels the same way that I do" he replied quietly, as he looked back to Arthur.
"I don't think she feels any more than friendship a towards me" he smiled sadly.
"But how can you be so sure my boy?" Asked Gaius. "She seems to be crazy about you"
Merlin shook his head. "I'm nothing but a friend and nothing more"
"Merlin-" Arthur began but was cut off by a grown from the bed.
"Do you guys have to be so freaking loud!" Grumbled Quinn. "Why can't I ever sleep in?"
Merlin turned to a very grumpy looking Quinn. Even though her hair was a disaster, and she had a little bit of drool on her chin, to his eyes she was the prettiest thing in the whole world.
"What?" She asked, looking at them puzzled.
"You have a little-" Arthur jestered to his chin.
Quinn catching on, quickly wiped her mouth with the sleeve of her nightdress "Like you don't drool when you're sleeping there dear King Arthur" She stated as she got out of bed. "And according to Gwen you don't only drool but you snore like a bear. I'm going to my room to get dressed"
She left the room leaving them in silence. It took everything in Merlin not to laugh at the look of shock at his friends face.
"She's something" said Merlin after a few moment's.
"That she is" agreed Arthur.
"Why are you here anyway? thought that this was supposed to be my day off?"
"Ah, about that"
Merlin was instantly filled with dread.
Quinn was walking the Royal Gardens with Gwen, not talking about anything pacifically, when Gwen finally brought up the night before, which from where she was standing she was just waiting for the chance to ask her about it.
Apparently rumors spread fast like wildfire in Camelot, and she thought she was bored in her old life. She silently cursed Arthur and his big mouth.
"I just couldn't sleep"
"Oh, and?" Asked Gwen smirking.
"And nothing happened" 'not that he would do anything' she added silently.
Merlin and Arthur was discussing about the spell that would be sending her home, Arthur had insisted for her to stay, but Quinn wanted to spend the day around, and in Camelot in the grounds as much as she could before she was sent home.
But in her mind she was already home, but apparently what she wants doesn't matter, not to the person that means anything to that is.
Does Merlin feel anything for her? Anything at all besides friendship? Should she ask him? If This Were to be her last day in Camelot perhaps she should ask Merlin about his feelings towards her, but she was never good at this sort of thing.
Normally Quinn hated anything to do with talking about her feelings, and would avoided it like the deadly plague, but it appears that she is going to have to put aside that very thing that makes her uncomfortable, step out of her comfort zone and find out once and for all Merlin's feelings he may or may not have for her.
Quinn has been told several times that she is a very stubborn person.
Arthur could tell Merlin was distracted, but when he brought it up he would just deny it, muttering about something that was off the subject, and it was starting to get on his nerves a bit.
Clearly he was only thinking about one person.
"Merlin, go see her"
"Who?" Asked Merlin, lifting his gaze from something outside the window to look at him.
"Quinn, who else? If what you say is true she won't be here for much longer. You say that the spell will work, and she'll be back in her world. So go see her, or I guarantee you will regret it"
"But-"
"Go!"
"No, I can't"
"Why?"
"Because she can't stay, I can't-"
"Merlin, go see her"
"I can't, I have a lot of-"
"You have the day off. Now, go see her"
"What about your m-"
"Merlin! Go!"
Merlin reluctantly left his Chambers, Arthur couldn't help but smirk at himself.
Merlin collided with someone as he was leaving Arthur's chambers, his heart jumped in his throat when he saw who that was. Quinn looked as shocked as he was.
For an awkward moment they just stared at each other.
"Merlin, I um- wanted to talk with you" Quinn said, playing with her thumb as she avoided her gaze from his "Can we talk?"
"Oh, yes, yes of course"
They walked outside. Merlin was curious what she wanted to speak with him about. It could just be his wishful thinking, but could it be that she was going to say that she was going to stay no matter what?
"Um- about the spell" Quinn said. "I was just curious if-"
"It's safe, you don't have to worry about it being dangerous" Merlin assured her. "You can trust me"
"Oh no, I wasn't worried about that, I know I can trust you. No, I was just curious if you-"
"I can do it today, if you want"
Quinn just looked at him for a awkward moment before saying. "Yes, i suppose that would be best. I guess you want to get rid of me huh?" The pain he saw within her eyes made his heart shatter.
"No!" He replied quickly. "That isn't- I don't-"
"You don't what?" She took a step closer. "What is it that you want to say Merlin?" She placed her hands on his chest, and stepped closer. "Is there something that you want to say?"
He had difficulty catching his breath, having her this close made his head go all fuzzy, but he doesn't mind in the slightest. He could not deny that he was in trance by her one blue and one green eye. "I- um-"
"Yes?" She stepped even closer, now they were inches apart. Without thinking he leaned forward slightly. He could feel her breath on his lips. He wondered what would it feel like to kiss her? To close the distance between them, it would be so easy to, would it be the right thing to do though?
Quinn was looking at him expectantly, she seem to be waiting for him to do just that. Placing his hands on her face he leaned forward.
He watched as her eyes fluttered than closed. Their lips were the slightest inches apart, when someone clearing their throat broke them both out of their trance.
They turned to a very amused Arthur.
"Sorry to interrupt. But Merlin, it's time"
Quinn took a step back, but her hands remained on his chest, reaching up he placed his hands over hers. She looked at him for a moment, before turning and walking away, her hands slipping easily out of his.
He was saddened not to feel the warmth that she was giving him.
Merlin wanted so desperately to grab her arm, and to beg her to stay. But he knew that wasn't the right thing to do.
"Sorry" said Arthur. "I didn't-"
"No, it's okay. Come on"
"I'm the king, I give the orders" he heard Arthur grumble as he walked away.
When they arrived to the place where Quinn knows it as stonehenge, Merlin immediately went to work, muttering something in a language she didn't understand.
According to Merlin stonehenge is a portal between world's, to the under world or to the world where Quinn is from.
Quinn stood Beside Arthur, watching Merlin, wishing somehow she could find the courage to tell him how she feels, the truth of the matter is that she is a coward.
Quinn knew what she's feeling is love, but she couldn't find the words to express it.
Everyone came to see her off, but she didn't want them to, she didn't want them to because she knew it would be harder for her to go, it's already hard enough, to say goodbye to all the friends that she made in Camelot, this whole situation, her having to say goodbye is making her heart shatter to millions of pieces, she knew saying those words to Merlin would be the hardest thing she had ever done in her entire life.
As soon as Merlin finished speaking a bright light appeared, and she knew her time was up.
"This is it" said Merlin.
Quinn looked at him. There was so much she wanted to say, but her words got caught in her throat.
Merlin, once again had stolen her breath. But she had to say it, because she knew if she didn't she would regret it.
Why did she have to realize how she feels when it's the last time? How is that fair? She wanted to stay in Camelot, and wanted to stay by Merlin's side. But she knew she couldn't, though she wanted to. This wasn't fair, for Merlin or herself.
She stepped closer to Merlin, taking his hands and placing them on her chest over her heart. She looked him in his eyes.
"Merlin"
"Yes?"
"I..don't..." She looked over at Arthur, who was giving his friend and her a sympathetic look. She looked back to Merlin. "I don't.."
"I know, Quinn, I know" He whispered softly.
Merlin changed position of their hands, now he was holding hers.
She leaned forward standing on her tippy toes. She could feel Merlin's breath on her lips. She closed her eyes.
Merlin's grip tightened around her hands. Was he trembling? Her heart was beating so fast she had difficulty taking a breath.
This was the last time she was going to see Arthur, Gwen, Gaius, all of the knights, and the hardest of them all, Merlin.
She didn't want to say that final farewell, those words that met goodbye.
She kissed him gently on the cheek. When she pulled back, she opened her eyes, and saw unshed tears in Merlin's blue eyes.
Merlin placed his forehead against hers, and she closed her eyes once again. "Quinn-"
"No! Don't . . don't say it"
She opened her eyes, and looked at him. "I won't say it. . .I will not say good bye to you. .i won't say those words to you"
"Nor I"
"Good"
She took a step back, but still holding his hand. Quinn looked at Gwen and Gaius.
"Make. .make sure Merlin stays out of trouble will you?"
"Of course" said Gwen pushing forward to in growth her in a hug.
"I. .wish you could stay"
"So do i Gwen, so do i" she said returning her hug.
When Gwen stepped back, Arthur walked to her and took a bow.
"You well be missed" he said, taking her hand and kissing it.
"That's something coming from you" said Quinn.
Arthur just smiled and went to stand beside his wife, who was crying uncontrollably now.
She looked at Gwaine Leon and Percival. "Try to behave yourselves, and don't pick on Merlin too much"
"No promises" smirked Gwaine.
"We will miss you" said Leon.
"Yes, we will" Percival agreed
"Gaius" she said looking at him, trying to hold back the tears that wanted so desperately to fall.
"I'm not to good at this sort of thing my girl"
"Neither am I". She laughed, wiping away a tear.
"But I will miss you"
"Thank you, Gaius"
Quinn looked at Merlin. His eyes were shimmering with unshed tears.
"This isn't goodbye"
"No. ." he shook his head.
With one final look at the faces that she grew to love, she started to step in the portal, and knew this was good bye.
"One thing" said Arthur.
Quinn stopped, turned and looked at him, baffled. "What?"
"We can't let a woman do this alone. Can we Merlin?" Arthur walked to Merlin, and draped an arm around his shoulders. "Am I right men?"
Merlin looked as confused as she felt. "I don't. . ."
"We are coming with you" said Gwaine, stepping forward to stand beside Arthur and Merlin. Long with Leon and Percival.
"But. .why?" Asked Quinn, looking at them in utter confusion. "Why would you guys do this for me?"
"Isn't it obvious?" Asked Arthur as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "You're our friend"
"And when a friend needs help we give it" Said Gwaine. "That's just the way we are"
"And you need our help, even though you are too stubborn to admit it" said Leon.
"Our minds are made up" said Arthur defiantly. "So there is no talking us out of it"
"I wouldn't dream of it" she said, smiling at all of them.
She looked at Merlin, who was smiling brightly. She knew she loved these guys, all of them, and she knew that there was no talking them out of it even if she wanted to.
"Then why are we all standing around here for? Let's go"
All together they stepped into the portal. She took one last look at Camelot in the distance, knowing somehow that she will be returning.
With love to all.