So, another chapter is ready. Think the next update is gonna take some more time, just so ya know. :)

Thanks for the reviews again, a special thanks to SpaceFlora, DinoDragonMaster and Wolftattoo who review almost every chapter I publish. Guys, it means a lot to me you take the time, over and over again, to review my story. Thanks. Really.

As for the rest, also a big, big, big thanks to you! I mean, every review is much appreciated.

Enjoy this chapter! ^^

Chapter forty four

Throttle was still holding his younger bro, tears burning behind his eyes. But no matter how hard it was, he forced himself to stay strong.
For Vinnie.
It cost him all his self control. Seeing Vinnie like this, well, it almost ripped his heart outta his chest. Looking at Modo, he knew the big guy felt the same. But Ruby kept telling them they needed to give him some time. His body had suffered a lot, they had messed with his brain… but she wasn't planning on giving up on him already. And that was just what the two mice needed right now. Someone who told them there was still a chance. Because they both were very close of losing all hope.
Throttle lost all sense of time, but after what seemed to be a eternity, Vinnie slowly calmed down a little. He stopped grinding his teeth. His muscles seemed to relax. His tail was now hanging down as a lifeless snake.
Throttle slowly let him go, rubbing his cramped hands.
"There ya go", Ruby said, almost lovingly.
Throttle studied Vinnie's face. And he almost missed it. But it did happen.
He saw the ruby red eyes looking back at him for a moment. He gently took his bro's hand.
"Vincent, it's me, Throttle. Modo is here too. Can you hear me?"
Nothing happened.
"Vinnie, if you can hear me, please squeeze my hand", the tan furred mouse asked patiently, hoping this would work now.
Nothing happened. Throttle sighed. Maybe he'd imagined it…
But then, he suddenly felt Vinnie's fingers move in his hand. His head jerked up.
"Ruby, he just moved his fingers!", he called out.
Ruby nodded, calm as ever.
"That's good. Keep talking to him."
Throttle quickly grabbed a chair and took place next to the bed, leaning on his elbows. Modo did the same at the other side of the bed.
And they both talked to their younger bro. They told him the most stupid stories, everything that just popped into their minds. Stories about Mars before the war. Stories about when they had met the young white furred mouse for the first time. Heck, Throttle even told him about his grandma, how she always pinched his cheeks when he was there to visit her.
Ruby signed to Throttle to continue and quickly walked to the yard.

She found Kiwi lying on the grass, curled up.
"Oh, Kiwi…", Ruby sighed and kneeled down next to the girl that she loved as her own daughter.
"I couldn't watch. I just… I couldn't. It made me sick. Jesus, what did they do to him…", Kiwi said toneless. It wasn't even a real question.
"Don't beat yourself up too hard, Kiwi. It wasn't exactly a nice view. But I came to tell you he's calm now. Throttle and Modo are talking to him, and by the looks of things, he can hear them. I thought, maybe you wanna join them again?"
But Kiwi shook her head.
"No…"
"Kiwi…"
"I said no."
"Okay, your call…"
Ruby slowly rose on her feet again, battling with herself what to do. But she decided to give Kiwi some time. She knew her. And right now, there was nothing she could do or say to get through to her. So, she walked back inside, cursing softly that she'd to witness all this again.
The horror.
The pain.
The sorrow.
Dammit, and just when she was starting to feel a little bit better. But at the same time, how weird that may be, there was no other place she wanted to be right now, at this very moment. Because she needed to do everything that was in her power to save that stubborn, arrogant white furred mouse. Not because she liked him that much, but because his life was entwined with Kiwi's life now. And she knew perfectly well that if Vinnie died, Kiwi was lost and beyond fixing.

Hours past. Throttle and Modo had talked to their younger bro almost non stop. He was completely calm now. But his eyes were still empty. Throttle felt how his own eyes became heavy and he hardly could talk anymore, since his voice was almost gone after talking for so long. He saw Modo was already asleep with his head on top of his arms which were resting on Vinnie's bed. Throttle fought to keep his eyes open, but it was a losing battle. Soon, he was also snoring softly. Ruby was sleeping on the couch.
It was this moment that Kiwi decided to come back. She faltered towards the bed, her whole body shaking. But when she saw the peaceful sight, she let out her breath. Her macho mouse, lying in that bed with his two closest family members at both sides.
She stopped next to Throttle, who was deeply asleep and she hesitantly reached out her hand. Vinnie's eyes were closed and she softly touched his cheek, feeling his soft fur under her fingers. At the same time, Vinnie slowly opened his eyes. Kiwi's heart skipped a beat. And she suddenly was overwhelmed with the need to be as close as possible to the love of her life.
She needed to hold him. To smell him. To feel him.
She wriggled herself past Throttle and climbed on Vinnie's bed. She saw that Vinnie's eyes were following her and again, her heart skipped a beat. Maybe he wasn't that lost as she'd thought he was. She crawled under the blanket against his naked torso, laying her right leg over his. Letting out a heavy sigh, she lay her head on his chest, while wrapping her right arm around his waist.
Home. She was home.
His steady heartbeat filled her ear, his lovely scent filled her nose… And she finally felt calm for the first time since that awful moment in that small cottage on the roof. That moment she had felt his panic became hers, and even worse; that moment he suddenly was gone. She looked up, seeing he had closed his eyes again. His breathing was calm and deep.
There was no panic now. Only calmth.
She lay her head on his chest again and with a small smile on her face, she fell asleep within seconds.

Vinnie slowly opened his eyes. His head was killing him. He blinked a few times, but he noticed his eyelids were moving very slow. His vision was blurry.
What the…
He tried to move, but his body didn't seem to cooperate. It was the weirdest thing. It felt as if he was stuck in cement or something. He could tense his muscles, but lifting his arm, for example, was a no go. Same goes for lifting his head. He stared at the ceiling, trying to focus at one spot. His headache became even worse, but he noticed his vision slowly sharpened.
His eyes lowered and he saw the top of Kiwi's head with messy black hair coming out from under his blanket. She was holding him tightly, but fast asleep. He took a deep breath, and her scent filled his nose. She was here. She was really here. He now saw Throttle and Modo, somehow curled up, into a chair next to his bed. He wrinkled his nose and soon noticed he was missing something. The comfortable, soothing feeling of metal…
Fuck. His mask. Where was his mask?
He tried to get up, but his body still refused to do cooperate. He opened his mouth, but he somehow couldn't find the words. It was one messy pile of words in his mind and he failed to create order in the chaos.
Fucking hell...
He was a prisoner in his own body. And that felt all too familiar.
Slowly, the memories came back.
Modo's arm.
Karbunkle's lab.
The robot.
Jester.
His attempt to escape.
The horror that followed.
And after that, darkness… Followed by some blurry memories while his mind was controlled by Karbunkle. He saw a vague image of him holding his bro's and Kiwi who ran towards him.
But he'd survived. He had to admit, he was surprised. He thought he'd died in that lab.
Maybe he did. A piece of him did. For sure.
But here he was. Alife. But not kicking.
Dammit…

Suddenly, someone popped up next to him and his heart almost jumped outta his chest. Not that his body reacted, but the monitor next to him started to beep loudly.
"Wow, easy, it's me, Ruby…", he heard a familiar voice.
His eyes followed the sound.
Ruby.
But how… She was here? Did she save him?
He suddenly wished even more he could talk. So that he could tell her to end this. To ask her why she had saved him. To ask her why she just hadn't let him die. Gosh...
"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. How are you feeling?", she asked, quickly examining him.
He tried everything in his power to answer her question, but again, he failed. The words remained on the messy pile in the thing that was called his mind. It was so goddamn frustrating.
Every time he opened his mouth, nothing came out. Jesus, this was humiliating.
He gave Ruby a pleading look, one tear escaped his eye.
"Okay, I get it. Let's try this differently", and the red headed human grabbed his hand.
It felt weird to hold another human hand than Kiwi's. But it was comforting at the same time.
He hardly recognized himself. Since when was he this… depressed? It usually wasn't his way of dealing with things. But this was too much, even for him.
"Yes is one squeeze, no is two squeezes. Think ya can do that?"
Vinnie concentrated and after a while, he managed to squeeze her hand once.
"Very good. Now, trust me when I say you don't need to panic if you're noticing your body isn't cooperating right now. Your brains are damaged and it's gonna need some time to heal. I also want you to know that you're safe here, no one's gonna hurt you. You understand?"
Yes.
"Are you in a lot of pain now?"
Yes.
"I can give you something if that's okay?"
She saw a flash of panic in his eyes.
"I know you're scared. But you know I'm not here to hurt you. I'm here to help you, but you need to let me, okay?"
No.
No more needles.
No more suffering.
Please, just kill me…
Right here.
Right now.
Put me outta my misery...
But the pain in his head became even worse, how that even was possible was a mystery to him, alright. But it made him squeeze her hand once.
Ruby nodded. He trusted her. Somehow, that gave her a good feeling. She obviously was completely clueless about the real reason of his inner battle.
She quickly grabbed a syringe with a heavy painkiller and walked back to the bed and took his hand again.
"Ready?"
NO.
Yes.
She quickly gave him the drugs and he soon relaxed a little, his eyes a little cross eyed.
Ruby smiled.
"Go back to sleep, bouncing ball. Your body needs it."

A few days past. Slowly, the white furred mouse was able to move his body again. But he hadn't said one word yet. Ruby told them it was normal, but Kiwi thought there was more to it. She had the nagging feeling her macho mouse was perfectly able to speak, but that he just refused. He wasn't himself. He was staring at the ceiling with that agonizing look on his face, his eyes burning with pain and trauma. He refused to eat. He refused to talk. He refused to do anything else than just lie there. It was as if he'd gave up.
And maybe he did.
Kiwi could only imagine the horror he'd went through, and that after all the things he'd already seen and experienced. She wanted to get through to him that he wasn't alone. That they all were there for him. But he didn't respond. He was just lying there. A shadow from the mouse he once was.
A empty shell.
It broke Kiwi's heart. But she knew he just needed time. Well, that was what everyone kept telling her. But what if even time couldn't heal these wounds? These scars on his soul? His beautiful soul… now shattered into a million pieces. Was he ever gonna be the same again? She had the nagging feeling he wasn't. But she tried to stay positive. After all, she knew how it was to sink that deep. To be completely surrounded by darkness. Back then, she had never thought she was gonna smile again. That she was gonna feel anything next to the immense pain. But look at her right now. Even if life was still complicated and there was still so much misery, she had found the strength to fight back again. And she knew Vinnie could too.
But yes, these kinda things cost time. A lot of love. And she was willing to give him everything he needed, as long as that meant she was gonna have him back one day. She would do everything for him. Because without him, life would be meaningless and empty again.

That day, Kiwi was doing the laundry. Not something that she liked to do, but the mice were almost running outta clothes. Well, Modo and Throttle were. But she Vinnie could use some clean clothes too, whenever he was able to get outta that bed, that is. When she grabbed Vinnie's pants, the one he'd wore that awful day, something fell outta his pocket. It made tinkling sound when it hit the floor. She ducked and grabbed the metal, round shaped object.
"What the…"
"His mask…", she heard a husky voice saying softly. Kiwi's head jerked up while breathing in sharply.
"Jesus, you scare the shit outta me, never heard of… wait… what? His mask?", she suddenly asked urgently.
Throttle chuckled and walked closer to her.
"Yeah, it's made of some kind of fluid metal. Really, it's amazing stuff for bike repairs and for your macho mouse makeover, Harley's words."
Kiwi stared at the round object, it was very hard to believe such a thing as fluid metal really existed. But then again, she was standing next to a almost seven foot tall talking mouse.
Hehe. Just saying.
"Maybe this is gonna wake him up outta his trance thingy…", she whispered hopeful, looking at Throttle.
He rubbed his chin and then lay a hand on her shoulder, a friendly look on his face.
"You could be right. Give it to him, then we'll see what happens…"

"Vinnie? I've found something that I think you want back…"
Kiwi held up the round piece of metal and Vinnie's eyes lowered, looking at the object.
He breathed in. His eyes grew big. And he opened his mouth.
"My… my mask…", he whispered, his voice hoarse.
Kiwi fighted the urge to do a victory dance. Ya see? So he could speak. She realized she just knew him too well.
"Yeah, it was in the pocket of your pants…"
Vinnie frowned, his eyes narrowed. How was that even possible? But suddenly it hit him.
"Jester…", he eventually rasped.
He suddenly remembered the fish putting something in his pocket, right after he'd took his mask... But why…?
"What do ya mean, bro?", Throttle asked.
Vinnie stretched out his hand and gently took the piece of fluid metal outta Kiwi's hand, almost lovingly.
"He put it in my pocket…"
Kiwi and Throttle looked at each other, a surprised look on their faces.
Vinnie slowly got upright and started to peel off the bandage on his head. He obviously couldn't wait to put his mask back on again.
"Lemme help ya…", Kiwi mumbled and quickly removed the bandage.
She wasn't sure if Ruby was gonna agree on this, but right now, she couldn't care less. He needed that mask.
Vinnie lay the metal against his face, and indeed, it suddenly came to life and wrapped around his face, and soon, his awful scars were back where they belonged, namely; hidden under his mask. He let out his breath and closed his eyes for a moment. He wrinkled his nose and a small smile appeared on his face. He somehow felt so much less naked because of the comforting feeling of metal. But then his smile faded again.
But Kiwi tried to hold onto that small moment. He did smile, after all.
"Better?", she asked and he nodded, lying down again.
"Yeah…"
He closed his eyes and soon drifted off. Kiwi smiled lovingly at him, adjusting his blanket.
Maybe time could heal him after all…

A few weeks later...
"Ugh, sweetheart, come on! I'm not invalide! I can do this by myself!", Vinnie called out annoyed when Kiwi wanted to help him put on his shirt.
"Yeah yeah, I know. So that's why I find you here, with your head in the hole where your arm needs to be…". she snarled back, but with a loving smile on her face.
"Yeah well, that's the damned shirt its fault, not mine", Vinnie said stubborn and with the logica of a child, still wrestling with his shirt.
The white furred mouse was feeling a lot better now, but his body was still suffering from side effects after the whole event. He sometimes couldn't find words, making him stutter like a small kid that learned how to talk. His right arm sometimes didn't cooperate, no matter how hard he tried. His tail sometimes suddenly lashed through the air without him knowing it.
But Ruby had told them it was gonna be okay in the end. It just needed time and training. But Vinnie wasn't really known for having much patience. And he pushed himself too far sometimes. It was Kiwi's job to slow him down, but that wasn't easy. But she didn't care. Because Vinnie was slowly turning back into his old self. And that was all that mattered to her. Even if he was testing her patience right now.
"Argh, come here you, macho mouse. Just lemme help."
Kiwi grabbed the shirt and quickly pulled it over his head. She saw him glaring at her, but she couldn't care less.
"There. That wasn't that hard, right?"
Vinnie muttered something under his breath, but Kiwi ignored it.
She knew he wasn't angry at her. He was angry at his body. He just wanted it to be back to normal. It busted his ego, big time, that she needed to help him get dressed. She could understand that. She would've felt the same way if she was in his position. Besides, his body was his pride. The fact it sometimes still didn't cooperate, was hard for him to accept. And the worst thing ever, even if his recovering was ridiculously fast when you compared it with how long a human would need, it was going to slow for him. So, he could be one grumpy, tensed ball of fur and muscle sometimes. Which was a logical response to his injuries, though.

Vinnie never talked about what had happened to him. When she'd gave back his mask, he somehow had managed to scramble back on his feet. A few days later he was already walking around again, stubborn as he was. But he never told them anything about what had happened in that lab that horrible day. They didn't push him either. Time would tell how much damage this had caused, and they were not talking about his physical health. He already suffered from PTSS. This probably made it worse.
But for now, they all focussed on helping their beloved hyperactive friend back on his feet. They were all very grateful he'd made it. And they were very happy to see him slowly transform back into his usual self. Because even if he could be a huge pain in the ass, he was here.
Being a pain in the ass. Just like they knew him.
And they wouldn't have wanted it another way.
Ruby was gone again. But she did say goodbye this time. And that gave Kiwi the peace she needed. Modo hadn't talked to her about them. He couldn't. He was too caught up with taking care of his younger bro. And he had peace with her being happy. That's all he ever wanted. Maybe, deep down he felt heartbroken. That again, his chance of love was gone before he could even process it. Maybe he was gonna be alone the rest of his life. Well, then so be it. As long as he had his bro's, he wasn't really that alone.
Throttle was back to his old, calm self. But sometimes, when Kiwi saw him looking at Vinnie struggling with his trauma, she could feel his anger again. It somehow came off him like waves of electricity. But he managed to keep his cool. Next to this rare moments, he was calm. Just what they needed. But Kiwi couldn't help her wonder how much impact this had on the fearless leader. She just hoped he talked to Carbine about it. Maybe she would ask him one day. Yeah, maybe she would...

That night, Vinnie was lying in his bed, staring at the ceiling. Weeks had past. Slowly, he was getting complete control back over his body. But ever since he'd woke up, he had this weird feeling as if he was living in the body of a stranger. It just felt… wrong. Maybe it was because his body didn't do what he wanted it to do sometimes. Ugh. Everyone kept telling him it needed time.
But the thing is; he was done with being the patient. Done with being the poor guy who'd suffered. Ya know, that poor fella who was fucked up by the Plutarkians. Yeah… I heard they tortured him. Scarred his face. And if things weren't bad enough already, they also messed with his brain… Oh man, so sad…
Ugh. Fuck that.
He was done. Mainly because Throttle still didn't let him ride his bike. Ruby had gave the tan furred mouse the strict order to keep him off the road for at least 8 weeks. It was now week 6. And he yearned for a ride so badly. To clear his head. To feel the adrenaline rushing through his body again. To feel how it was to be himself again. But he couldn't. Not in secret either. Throttle had disabled his bike by taking out the AI and hid it god knows where.
His older bro just knew him too damn well.
He'd never really thought about that day in the lab. His mind had pushed it away, and he made sure it stayed away. Focussing on his physical health, to get back on his feet as quick as possible was all he cared about. So he could ride his bike again. So he could be himself again. But now, his mind wandered off. His heart started to beat faster and he closed his eyes. He saw Jester, smiling at him. Vinnie's eyes flew open again. One thing kept bothering him. Why had Jester put his mask in his pocket? Why should he bother?
Hmmm..
Maybe, just maybe, the crazy ass fish did like him after all. Maybe he did see him as a friend, how weird that may be. But it somehow fitted the profile. The small fish was insane indeed, but he somehow truly believed he was doing a right thing. He truly believed he'd helped Vinnie by cutting his face. Vinnie had the feeling the little shrimp didn't had true bad intentions.
Not that that made it less worse. Not that that made Vinnie hate him less than he did.
But he was dead now. Throttle had killed him. Exactly as he'd promised. And Vinnie had to admit, that when he'd heard the news, it somehow gave him a strange feeling of peace. One thing was for sure, that piece of insanity could never hurt him again, no matter what his intentions were.
He rolled on his side. He couldn't sleep. His body was restless. His mind was making overtime. He needed some movement. But he was stuck here, there was no way… wait...
Suddenly, he jerked upright with a big smirk on his face, but his body quickly reminded him sudden movements like that weren't welcome. His nose wrinkled when he felt the sharp pain in his brain and he took a few deep breaths. It slowly faded away and he slid outta bed, quickly pulling on his clothes and luckily, he succeeded without needing any help.
Score.
He carefully opened the door of his bedroom and peeked around the corner. But the guesthouse was, except for Modo's loud snoring, peacefully quiet. Meaning, his bro's were fast asleep. He tiptoed past Throttle's room and when he reached the door that leaded outside, he stopped for a moment and pricked his ears. But still no movement.
Good.
He pushed down the handle, but the click of the lock sounded as a gunshot in the silence. Vinnie froze, his heart pounding in his chest. If Throttle would caught him, he was in serious trouble. Suddenly, he couldn't hold himself back anymore and he quickly sneaked outside, closed the door and ran over the grass to the garage. He slipped inside and put on the lights. His beloved bike was standing in the corner, completely motionless. It somehow gave him the urge to cry, to see his bike standing this still. Normally, the machine was just like him, eager to go on a ride, to throw herself into a battle, to win a race... He shook his head.
"Sorry sweetheart…", he whispered softly, his fingers slid along her side while looking at the bikes in the garage.
He suddenly started to doubt his idea. What was Kiwi gonna think about this? It were her father's bikes after all and she was very possessive over them, not that he could blame her. But his restless body, his restless mind made him decide to continue his plan.
He picked the heaviest bike that came closest to a race model.
It didn't came even close to his own bike, which was the coolest, of course, but hey; now wasn't the time to be picky.
While putting on his helmet, he took place on the seat. A big smile appeared on his face while starting the engine, knowing he had to be quick now. If Kiwi was gonna wake up from the sound, she was gonna be down within minutes. He pushed the button of the small remote to open one of the garage doors and hit the accelerator. The bike flew outside and Vinnie bit on his lower lip to stop his cheer that almost escaped his mouth. Even if it wasn't his own bike, the bike was fast enough and when the front gate was open, he made a sharp turn and finally, he was on the road again.
Finally.
He opened the gas and the bike roared, but Vinnie kept pushing her. Within seconds, he was driving around 90 miles and a big grin almost split his face in half. He opened the visor to feel the wind and he let out a happy cheer.
"AAAOOOW, hell yeah, back in the saddle again!"
He popped a wheelie and gained even more speed.
Guess it turned out Throttle didn't knew him that well, after all… hehehe.

After driving for two hours, Vinnie decided it was time to go back home. He sure hoped everybody was still asleep, but he'd the nagging feeling they weren't. He'd shut down the radio in his helmet so they couldn't reach him, smart as he was.
Pfuh, come on. He was Vinnie van Wham. He finally felt a small spark inside of him that felt so familiar.
Fuck yeah, he was Vinnie van Wham.
The baddest mamma jammer from this side of the asteroid belt.
The velocity atrocity.
And he wasn't that poor guy who was fucked up.
No.
He was Vinnie van Wham.
Handsome. Sexy. Macho. The best.
And a Freedom Fighter who couldn't be killed. A Martian Mouse who, after everything he'd been through, still was alive and kicking.
He was invincible.
He let out his characteristic battle cry and rushed back home.
Deep down, he knew this was the adrenaline talking and that things weren't this easy. But it felt good for now.

He drove back inside the garage and turned off the engine. A smile curled his lips when he noticed he was alone and he pulled off his helmet, feeling so much better after this.
But when he stepped off the bike, he suddenly heard the door open and he froze.
"There you are, Vincent. I was looking for ya…"
Throttle's voice.
Shit. He was fucked.
He slowly turned around, a faint blush on his face.
"Well… Tadaaa! You found me!", and he spread his arms with a sheepish smile on his face.
But Throttle didn't smile. He walked closer to Vinnie and grabbed him by the shirt.
"You think this is funny? We were worried sick about you. After everything that happened, you thought it was a good idea to ride off in the middle of the night, without telling us?"
Vinnie did a step back and tried to peel off his bro's fingers off his shirt, but Throttle slapped his hand away, still holding him.
The white furred mouse raised his hands in his defence.
"Bro, bro, relax… I just went for a ride. No big deal…"
"No big deal?"
Throttle's voice was now so low, Vinnie could feel his hands turned sweaty. He knew his bro well enough to know he was close to losing his shit. And that didn't happen that often. So, that kinda confirmed he'd fucked up.
Big time.
"I eh… Well, ya see… Ehm… Hehehe, well…", Vinnie stuttered, trying to find the words to explain.
"I don't need to remind you that I forbid you to ride a bike for at least 8 weeks, now do I?", Throttle asked, still holding Vinnie and even if his younger bro couldn't see it because of the glasses, he could feel his gaze almost burn a hole in his skull.
"8 weeks? I thought it were 6! Silly me...", Vinnie squeaked, knowing perfectly well he was lying right now. Throttle knew too. He could see it in the ruby red eyes of his bro. But of course, Vinnie did what he always did when he was in trouble. He kept talking.
"And technically you told me I wasn't allowed to ride my bike, not a bike… There's the difference, ya see? I…"
"Stop. Talking. Vincent."
Throttle tensed his grip around Vinnie's shirt and the white furred mouse could see a muscle twitching in Throttle's face.
"Okay, okay! Geez, I couldn't sleep, I was restless and I needed a ride. And no, I didn't ask you because I knew you were gonna say no…", the white furred mouse quickly explained.
"Of course I was gonna say no, you're still recovering, Vincent. Do I need to remind you…", but Vinnie interrupted him.
"NO! No, you don't need to remind me, I was there, wide awake when they planted those fucking electrodes in my brain. I know, okay?", he breathed.
"Then you know perfectly well your body took quite the knocking and you need to take things slow! Do you have any idea how worried…", Throttle trailed off, taking a few deep breaths to calm down. "You didn't see how devastated Kiwi was when we found you, bro. If you can't take it slow for yourself, then at least try to do it for her…"
He slowly let go off Vinnie's shirt and the white furred mouse immediately stepped back, outta range of his angry leader, adjusting his shirt.
For a moment, they only stared at each other. Throttle slowly calmed down again, feeling a pang of guilt when he looked at his younger bro. He couldn't really blame him for wanting to go for a ride. Riding his bike was like therapy for him. And it somehow felt wrong to use Kiwi to slow him down.
Because, truth to be told… Kiwi was still asleep and had no idea what was happening right now. It was Throttle himself who'd almost died ten times this night because of worry. He couldn't get the image of his younger bro outta his head that day he woke up. Jesus, it was just so wrong what they did to him, after everything he'd already been through.
Besides, he'd never seen it coming. Vinnie was a master in everything he did, he didn't get hurt that easily. He did the most stupid and dangerous stunts and almost made it out without a scratch on his body. He'd thought this whole plan of his, to get Modo a new arm, wasn't gonna be any different. But it was different. Jesus, it was. And he came out with more than just a scratch.
It had broken his heart. And it sure was a wake up call for him as leader. Vinnie had almost died under his watch. That was a hard pill to swallow, that's for sure.
"Ya sure I need to take thing slow for Kiwi, or…", Vinnie broke him outta his thoughts. He'd seen the look on his leaders face. And something was bothering him.
"Yes. Now, go back to bed, you need to rest."
"But…"
"No buts, Vincent. Your right eye is almost staring at your nose, a sign that you're tired. Get outta my face."
Vinnie saluted, a sarcastic look on his face. He wasn't sure why Throttle was acting the way he did. But he decided it was his problem now. And he marched outta the garage, closing the door behind him with a loud bang, leaving the guilty feeling tan furred mouse alone. And Throttle decided to keep this between them. He wasn't gonna tell Kiwi about this. He just couldn't.

Kiwi was cleaning up the house. She needed to do something to distract her mind, since she was worried about Vinnie 24/7 now. And it wasn't healthy, because her macho mouse was doing a great job. From what she'd experienced so far, she guessed it was now safe to say that Martian Mice did have a quicker healing system. Because a human wouldn't be back on his feet this fast after such a traumatic event. But he still wasn't the same. And he was getting anxious, she could tell. All he wanted, was his body to be his again. So he could ride again. Fight again. Make love again…
She shook her head angrily, not liking the way her mind constantly reminded her of the fact he was keeping his distance. Jesus, come on... The guy had been through hell and back. Recovering was already hard enough, not really a big surprise that sex was the last thing he was thinking about right now. But that fact just worried her. Because she was talking about Vinnie now. He was always in the mood for sex. But after all these weeks, he hadn't touched her. Well, not in that kinda way.
Ugh. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, girl.
She put on loud music and started with the kitchen. The mice were still asleep, they probably wouldn't wake up for at least a few hours, so she finally had some time for herself.
Since she had speakers hanging in every room, the music was loud and it was just what she needed. She could feel her head slowly became empty, which was a very welcome feeling. And when she heard the familiar tones of "Pretty fly for a white guy", one foot slowly started tapping with the beat.

"You know it's kind of hard
Just to get along today"

Kiwi's whole body started to move, she just couldn't stop herself. Before her parents died, she'd loved to dance. Almost every weekend she'd been in the club with her friends, making fun and above all; to dance. It was her way of dealing with stress. She loved it. And now for the first time since she'd lost her parents, her body finally could feel the melody again and react on it, instead of shutting down.
A big smile appeared on her face and she threw the sponge in the sink. Soap splashed in all directions, but Kiwi didn't care.

"So don't debate, a player straight
You know he really doesn't get it anyway
He's gonna play the field, and keep it real…"

Kiwi jumped through the kitchen while playing air guitar, having the time of her life since a very long time. She grabbed the broom and used it as a microphone, pulling her hair loose while singing loudly along with the Offspring.

"Give it to me baby
AHA AHA
Give it to me baby
AHA AHA
Give it to me baby
AHA AHA
And all the girls say I'm pretty fly…"

"For a white guy!", Kiwi screamed into her self made microphone and then used it as a guitar, while jumping around and bang her head on the beat, feeling as free as a bird.
When the song ended, the heavy sound of a guitar filled the kitchen and Kiwi knew Vinnie had been messing with her playlist again. Not that she didn't like metal. On the contrary.

"Killing in the name of!"

Just when she was in the middle of pretending she was playing the guitar with her broom while headbanging, she suddenly bumped into something.
Something furry. And a familiar smell filled her nose. She opened her eyes and looked straight into the amused face of Vinnie. His eyes were twinkling and his lips curled into that smile she loved so much. The one she'd thought she would never see again. But here he was.
"Hey sweetheart… having fun?", he asked, his voice a little hoarse.
Kiwi could feel her cheeks slowly turn red and soon, her whole face was burning.
Shit. Busted.
"H-how long have you been standing there?", she stuttered, quickly setting the broom against the wall.
"Long enough to see you having the time of your life with a broom", he chuckled, winking at her.
Kiwi punched him, feeling embarrassed from head to toe.
He wasn't supposed to see that. Dammit, she was never gonna hear the end of it.
Vinnie laughed and pulled her in his arms.
"Gotta admit though, you've got some fine moves, doll", he whispered in her ear.
Kiwi decided this was a lost battle and lay her head against his chest, listening to his heartbeat.
"Are you okay, love?", she asked, worried as always.
Vinnie shrugged, as always.
"I'm fine."
Kiwi closed her eyes for a moment, enjoying the moment. But then, she untangled herself and looked into his eyes.
His sad eyes.
Ever since he woke up after that horrible day, his eyes had this expression she hadn't seen before.
As if he was broken. Maybe he was. She knew he was.
"You're not fine, macho mouse. I can see it in your eyes... ", she said softly, laying a hand against his cheek.
He closed his eyes for a moment, enjoying her touch. But he said nothing.
"Just know I'm here. Whenever you're ready…"
He opened his eyes again and gave her a small nodd.
Kiwi's heart was crying. She just wished she could take away his pain. His sorrow. His fear. But she couldn't.
The last tones from Rage Against The Machine slowly died and after a short moment of silence, piano music started. Kiwi froze.
Great timing, John Legend. Ugh.
Vinnie gave her a little shy smile and offered her his hand.
"May I have this dance, pretty lady?"
Kiwi's head jerked up, that was the last thing she'd expected from that white furred loudmouth. But he was serious. For once. So, she decided to take advantage of this rare moment and she took his hand, smiling a little.
He pulled her closer and lay one hand on her back, while holding her hand with the other one.

"What would I do without your smart mouth?
Drawing me in, and you kicking me out...
Got my head spinning, no kidding, I can't pin you down...
What's going on in that beautiful mind?
I'm on your magical mystery ride...
And I'm so dizzy, don't know what hit me, but I'll be alright..."

Of course he could dance too. He led her with a smoothness she wasn't really surprised about and she could see how his face lit up a little. It gave her the sudden urge to cry. Her poor, poor macho mouse.
So much misery.
So much pain.
But this felt good. He actually enjoyed it. She did too.

"My head's under water...
But I'm breathing fine...
You're crazy and I'm out of my mind..."

He let go off her back and gently pushed her away, without letting go off her hand. She made a pirouette, giggling a little and he pulled her against him again. He said nothing, but his eyes were twinkling and one corner of his mouth was curled into a small, arrogant smile.

"'Cause all of me...
Loves all of you...
Love your curves and all your edges...
All your perfect imperfections...
Give your all to me...
I'll give my all to you...
You're my end and my beginning...
Even when I lose I'm winning...
'Cause I give you all, all of me...
And you give me all, all of you…"

Vinnie let go off the traditional pose and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her against him. He pressed his forehead against hers, letting out a sigh.
She held him tightly, while looking into his beautiful, ruby red eyes.

"How many times do I have to tell you?
Even when you're crying you're beautiful too...
The world is beating you down, I'm around through every move...
You're my downfall, you're my muse...
My worst distraction, my rhythm and blues...
I can't stop singing, it's ringing, in my head for you..."

His hands slowly made their way up, gently cupping her head. His thumbs rubbed her cheeks softly and Kiwi felt a shiver going through her spine. His fingers weaved into her hair and he slowly bend forward.

"My head's under water...
But I'm breathing fine...
You're crazy and I'm out of my mind..."

She felt his lips on hers, smelled his lovely scent and a tear left her right eye.
He kissed her, softly.
Gently.
Carefully.
Lovingly.
Not rough as he used to do. No, this meant something. He was giving her a message. Her body suddenly trembled, overwhelmed by love. His love. Throttle was right. They were connected. It made her heart skip a beat. He was really hers. And it made her the proudest girl in this whole universe.

"'Cause all of me...
Loves all of you...
Love your curves and all your edges...
All your perfect imperfections...
Give your all to me...
I'll give my all to you...
You're my end and my beginning...
Even when I lose I'm winning...
'Cause I give you all of me...
And you give me all, all of you...
Give me all of you..."

He gently broke off the kiss and rested his forehead against hers again. She looked into his eyes and for the first time since he'd woke up, she saw something else.
Happiness.
It was small. But it was there. Her heart swelled, a warm feeling crept over her.

"I give you all, all of me...
And you give me all, all of you..."

The song slowly died, but the two of them hardly seemed to notice. Vinnie's tail whirled around her leg as a snake and he let out his breath.
"You have no idea how much I love you… How much you mean to me. I know I should tell you that more often…", but Kiwi lay a finger against his lips.
"I know, Vin, trust me, I know. And I love you too, so much that I can't even express it in words. But you feel it too, right? Same as I feel your love?"
"I do…"
His voice was hoarse. Thick of emotion.
His hand slowly reached to one of his studs. The ones she'd gave him. Her heart started to beat faster. He took one out of his ear and held it between his lips, while his hands gently pushed away her hair. She could feel how he took out one of her earrings, the one from her left ear. She held in her breath. What was he doing?
He lovingly took her hand and lay her own earring in it. Then, he took the stud, his stud, and placed it in her ear.
"There ya go, sweetheart", he said softly, while looking her in the eye.
"Look, I'm not the kinda guy who wants to marry and stuff, it's against everything that I am, but… I do want you to be mine, forever. I wanna be with you the rest of my life, to love you, to guide you, to be there for ya when you need me… Always... "
Kiwi's eyes filled with tears, suddenly remembering this whole thing with the earrings was the Martian 'ritual' to propose. But Vinnie gave it his own twist and that was exactly why she loved him so much. He was unique. He never did what anyone told him to do. He just did what felt right.
"Vin, I…", she started, but suddenly looked at the earring in her hand. With shaking fingers, not knowing if she was doing the right thing, she took the black diamond and raised her hand. She put it in his ear, suddenly not caring anymore if it was part of the ritual anymore. She did what felt good. When she was done, she looked into Vinnie's eyes.
"I'll be yours forever, Vincent. A small moment I'd thought I lost you. And it was unbearable. I'm nothing without you. And I wanna spend the rest of my life with you. Forever."
Vinnie's eyes lit up and he gave her a shy smile.
"Forever…", he whispered back.

Kiwi suddenly felt him tense, as if he was realizing this was no good for his macho mouse image and she smiled.
So far his moment of seriousness. She playfully pushed him away.
"So, where did you learn to dance like that?", she asked teasingly.
A faint blush was visible under his white fur, just like she'd hoped.
"Oh man…", he muttered under his breath. "Ask Throttle, he can tell ya all about the Martian culture. It's all about traditions, etiquette, blablabla. Boring, if you ask me. Ugh."
Kiwi was kinda surprised to hear that.
"What? I must say, that was the last thing I'd expected giving your ehm… well, ya know."
"What? My beautiful studly body? My macho mouse image? My spotless reputation? Me being so badass you hardly can handle it?", Vinnie summed up with a arrogant smile, studying his nails.
Kiwi giggled.
"Something like that… But are you trying to tell me you had to follow dance lessons?"
She saw a image of a young, white furred mouse who was tripping over his own tail and feet while trying to learn the dance steps. Her lips curled into a big grin.
Vinnie saw it and rolled his eyes.
Dammit.
"Yeah, I was forced, okay? Time for breakfast, sweetheart!", he quickly added while opening the fridge, pretending to search for rootbeer.
Kiwi shook her head, still smiling. She grabbed a few things and started to prepare breakfast.
"Okay, okay. But lemme tell ya one thing; I like guys who can dance, crazy mouse."
Vinnie's face lit up and he pumped up his chest, looking very satisfied with himself right now. Kiwi focussed on the hotdogs, very happy that slowly he was turning back into his old self.
Thank the Mothers of Mars.

During breakfast, Throttle suddenly saw a red glitter in Kiwi's ear. He stopped chewing for a moment and his eyes grew big. Luckily, he was wearing glasses so nobody saw it. Then, he slowly turned his gaze back on Vinnie and saw he was wearing Kiwi's earring.
Hmmm..
He looked at Kiwi again, who was eating her breakfast with a dreamy expression on her face. So, she's wearing Vinnie's stud now. But Throttle noticed it was in her left ear. Usually, when a Martian male asked his partner to become his through marriage, the earring was put into her right ear.
Hmmm…
He looked at Vinnie again. The white furred mouse was focused on how to eat his breakfast as fast as possible, but what's new? Well, the expression his face was. He looked better. As if a huge burden had fallen of his shoulders. Throttle was battling with himself if he needed to ask about the earrings, when Modo suddenly opened his mouth.
"Ya got yourself a new pair of earrings, Kiwi ma'am?"
Kiwi and Vinnie both froze and Throttle smiled.
Modo stared from one to another, not sure why they reacted this way. It was a perfectly normal question, right?
"I eh… Yeah, I do", Kiwi finally managed to squeeze out.
"You got something to tell us, Vincent?", Throttle asked, not holding back anymore now Modo had touched the subject already.
Vinnie's head got redder than a traffic light and he shuffled his feet under the table, his tail lashed through the air.
Modo's mouth fell open. He suddenly understood why they reacted the way they did. He now saw Vinnie was wearing Kiwi's earring next to his red diamond stud. Ah, so that's why it looked so familiar. He had no idea. He really thought Kiwi had bought herself some new earrings.
Oops… But then a big grin appeared on his face.
"Yeah, Vinnie, when were you gonna tell us you two are getting married?"
Vinnie almost jumped up as if he got stung by a bee.
"It's not like that, I…", but Modo waved with his metal hand.
"Nothing to be ashamed of, bro. Congrats to you two."
Kiwi and Vinnie shared a annoyed look and Vinnie opened his mouth again, but Throttle decided it was way too funny to tease their younger bro and quickly cut him off.
"Yeah, congrats! So, when is the big day?"
"No, you guys don't understand…", Kiwi now started, but Modo lay a hand on her shoulder.
"If ya need someone to go dress shopping, I'm ain't the one. Just so ya know."
Throttle laughed at the shocked expression on Kiwi's face.
Vinnie slowly caught on what was happening here and leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms in front of him and let out a irritated sigh.
"Yeah, I'm with the big fella in this one. Maybe Carbine wants to come back to help ya with that one…", Throttle nodded.
"But we're…", Kiwi tried one more time, but Modo and Throttle were now babbling with each other about all the things they couldn't help with because they were too cool for that, or too manly, or too macho, or…
Kiwi looked at Vinnie, who looked as if he had a idea. He gave here a misschivous smile and winked at her.
'Play along', he mouthed to her while getting upright in his seat.
"Bro's, bro's… You're forgetting one important thing here…", he started, but Modo and Throttle hardly listened.
Vinnie decided to just drop the bomb.
"Who's gonna paint the baby room?", he asked casually.
That shut them up.
They both immediately stopped talking and turned their head slowly into the white furred mouse his direction.
"Say what?", Modo asked, his normal low voice a few tones higher now.
Kiwi tried to suppress her smile and succeeded.
"Yeah, and who's gonna help to change its diaper?", she added.
The two mice now stared at her.
Vinnie leaned back while folding his hands behind his head, a big smirk on his face.
Ooooh snap. They sure had them good. Exactly what they deserved.
Throttle finally found his voice again.
"Are you saying you're… you're… pregnant?" He almost hissed the last word.
Kiwi gave him a innocent look.
"Yeah, that's exactly what we're saying. You guys are gonna be uncles!"
"Vinnie is gonna be a dad?", Modo whispered in shock.
Vinnie had a hard time to keep his face in check, since the last thing he wanted at this very moment was becoming a dad.
Ugh.
But Kiwi couldn't hold herself back anymore and burst out into laughter. Vinnie soon joined her.
Throttle and Modo stared at them, but it soon dawned on them.
"You guys are the worst!", Modo rumbled, but with a smile on his face while shaking his head.
"Pfewie, sure got me there for a moment", Throttle breathed while waving air at his face.
"That will teach ya", Kiwi laughed.
"Okay, okay, point taken. So, tell me, Vincent. What's really going on here?"
The tan furred leader looked at his younger bro, but the white furred mouse slammed shut, still not comfortable with this.
Kiwi saw it and shook her head, rolling her eyes.
"You guys make a way too big deal outta this. Vinnie gave me his earring, not because he wants to marry me, but because he loves me and wants to spend the rest of his life with me. That's all."
"That's unusual sweet of ya, Vin", Modo said lovingly.
"Hey! I know perfectly well how to impress the ladies!", Vinnie protested, but his bro's knew this was way more than that.
This was going much, much deeper.
"Sure ya do", Throttle chuckled, deciding to put his bro outta his misery and he smoothly changed the subject.
"So, Kiwi, I was thinking; let's pick up training again today. Ya think you up to it?"
Kiwi gave one more smile to Vinnie before turning her gaze on Throttle.
"You bet I am", she said determined.
Vinnie glanced at her from under his lashes.
That was his girl. Maybe he was gonna make it through this shit after all.
Because no matter how broken he felt, no matter how much darkness surrounded him, there was Kiwi.
His light. His angel.
To guide him back home...

"Say you love me..."
"You know I do..."

Do you guys agree with me when I say I love it how well Vinnie and Kiwi match? They are the most adorable couple, but they can be downright dirty at the same time. Love it. I really enjoy writing scenes with them. They just fit so well together.

So, that's it for this chapter. Hope you guys liked it, please feel free to review, very much appreciated.

Till next time, guys.

Ride free, citizens.

PS; UGH, right, disclaimers. I used the lyrics from the Offsprin with Pretty Fly For A White Guy (thanks for the correction, Spaceflora) from John Legend with All of me.. Oh, and from Rage Against The Machine with Killing In The Name. They own these words, not me.