The second day of the conference passed much the same as the first, although Scully's head felt significantly fuller by the end of it. She was glad it was only two days and not three, as she felt her brain had reached its limit for absorbing new material. Still, it had been a welcome change to immerse herself in the medical aspects of her job again, and there were at least a handful of new techniques that she planned to investigate further once she was back home.
She tucked her sheets of handwritten notes into her folio and stretched, easing the kinks out of her back that were inevitably worse after too many hours of sitting in the same uncomfortable chairs. In the corridor outside conference room, she was happy to spot Stella by the elevators, and she made her way over to her before placing her hand on her arm to get her attention.
"Stella — hi."
Stella turned, and her eyes warmed at the sight of her. "Dana." She paused, studying her, and Scully realized she was still holding on to Stella's arm. She let go more abruptly than she intended, feeling slightly flustered, although Stella seemed unperturbed. "How were your panels today?"
Scully shrugged and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "Good. Interesting. It's a lot of information to process all at once, though. I think I'll feel better looking at it all with fresh eyes in a few days."
Stella made a noise of agreement. "I know exactly what you mean."
"I forgot to ask yesterday if you were planning on coming to the wind-up dinner tonight or not… I know it was listed as optional and, since you're local, I wasn't sure if you would be there."
Stella glanced at the handful of people around them waiting for the elevator. "About that…" She took Scully's hand and led her away from the crowd. "I was thinking. What do you say we skive off the official dinner and go out somewhere nicer, just the two of us?"
Stella's hand was comforting, folded delicately around her own. She hadn't let go, and Scully didn't particularly want her to.
"You know what? That sounds great. I think I've had my fill of small talk about post-mortem analytical toxicology."
Stella laughed. "Great. There's a good Italian place not terribly far from here. I wouldn't mind walking, if it's all right with you."
Scully smiled. Her chest felt like it was full of helium balloons, soaring up and out of sight. She gave Stella's fingers a cautious squeeze. "That sounds perfect. Ready when you are."
"They call me the 'Ice Queen'. At work."
Scully wasn't sure how they'd arrived at this topic, but here they were.
She was good at pretending that the moniker didn't bother her, but the sting of the first time she'd heard it had never fully scarred over. She knew, on a rational level, that she shouldn't let it get to her, that it was just a stupid nickname. She didn't even know who had come up with it or at what point it had come into general use, although she had a strong suspicion that it had been Agent Edwards, a narcissistic asshole who couldn't fathom the possibility that she wasn't interested in him.
He'd been persistent to the point that she'd almost allowed herself to entertain the notion of filing a formal complaint against him, but she hadn't been naïve enough — even then — to know how that would have turned out. The FBI was still an old boy's club and it would have been her word against his, and the black and white reality of it all was that her words were worth less. The blemish would be on how she was perceived, boys will be boys, after all, and then she would mysteriously start to find getting her job done more difficult. Lost paperwork. Delayed lab results. Accidental omissions of information as the boy's club closed ranks around him. No, she knew very well what the outcome of a formal complaint against him would have been.
So, she'd learned to deal with it. She avoided the floor he worked on unless it was absolutely necessary that she be there. She tried to never be in a situation where she was alone with him. She avoided the friendly invitations for drinks after work if she knew he was going to be there, too. It had been a relief when she had been assigned to the X-Files, knowing that there was almost no chance that she would ever have to work directly with him again.
As the months had gone by, she'd begun to relax, let her guard down. Sure, she'd been asked out on occasion by a few people in other departments, but they had all accepted her polite refusals without pursuing things further. She was gaining ground in the Bureau now, proving herself to be a resourceful and capable field agent in addition to her forensic pathology skills, and she was proud of the solve rates that she and Mulder had achieved.
It had been a shock when she'd found herself outside the copy room, on what had previously been an ordinary and unremarkable day of catching up on paperwork and expense reports.
"Fuck, who's the red head that's working downstairs with Spooky now? I'd love to get me some of that. Do you think the carpet matches the drapes?"
A male voice, one she didn't recognize. She'd stopped, frozen, in the hallway right next to the open door.
"That's Dana Scully. Enjoy looking, man, 'cause that's all you'll ever get to do. I heard she's fucking frigid. They don't call her the Ice Queen for nothing."
Another male voice. Also no one she knew.
The first man let out a laugh. "Probably a lesbian then. Figures. What a waste."
She hadn't been able to listen to any more and had turned around and headed back towards the elevators with her head held high, her back straight. So what if her legs had been shaking and she'd had to lean against the side of the elevator car all the way down? She'd sat at her desk for the rest of the morning with her head down, determined to not think of anything that wasn't related to the case notes directly in front of her as she typed. Mulder had commented on her flushed cheeks, asked if she was feeling okay, but she'd stayed at her desk the whole goddamned day and left at five, just like she always did. If she cried a little in the shower that night, no one else ever had to know.
Stella set her fork down on the edge of her plate and dabbed at the corner of her mouth with her napkin. "They think it's so simple to divide us up, don't they? Virgins and whores." She took a sip of her wine, the merlot leaving a blush of purple on her lips as she set it back down. "If you fuck them, you're a slut. If you don't, you're a cock tease. There's no middle ground."
"Yeah." Scully sighed, spearing a chunk of roasted aubergine on her fork. "It just gets tiring after a while, you know."
"I do."
They ate in silence for a few minutes before Stella spoke again.
"So, what are you planning to do on your mandatory vacation days?"
"I honestly don't know." Scully shook her head lightly. "I'm staying here one more night on the taxpayer's dime and then I've booked a cheaper hotel for the next few days. I thought about going up to Scotland. I've always wanted to see Edinburgh."
Stella nodded in agreement. "You should. It's lovely. Don't tell anyone I said this, but it might be nicer than London." She winked conspiratorially. "It's only about four hours away by train."
It was tempting. She could cancel her hotel booking here, book something in Edinburgh and take the train there tomorrow. She might as well… she was here already, and when was the next time she might get the chance? Still, she was enjoying Stella's company, and staying in London might mean another opportunity to meet for dinner or to even spend part of a day together. Being with Stella felt so natural, like they were old friends catching up, rather than people who had just met.
"Maybe I will," Scully said after a moment. "And, how about you? Any plans for your mandatory time off?"
"I hadn't decided on anything concrete." She tilted the stem of her wine glass and swirled the contents gently. "I have to meet with the departmental psychiatrist again tomorrow morning, but no plans beyond that."
They had spent enough time together by now that Scully felt comfortable enough to ask, "Why are you on leave?"
"I was involved in a physical altercation with a suspect during his arrest. It was serious enough to warrant a brief procedural inquiry to ensure there was no wrongdoing on behalf of the police force that could jeopardize the eventual outcome of his trial." Stella drained the last swallow of her wine. "Standard policy, but no less frustrating."
Scully laid her cutlery neatly across her plate to indicate that she was finished and grinned at Stella. "It could be worse. Have you ever had to be in quarantine?"
Stella shook her head and gave a small eyebrow raise in return. "Dare I ask?"
Scully thought about the swarms of green glowing bugs in the forest, about the horrific fungal stalk she'd seen erupt from O'Neil's neck on Mount Avalon, about the alien virus and Antarctica… she wouldn't even know where to begin without sounding completely and utterly insane. That must be how Mulder felt all the time. With a wry laugh, she shrugged her shoulders. "Honestly, I don't even know where I would begin. Let's just say that it's worse than mandatory leave. About a million times worse."
Scully declined dessert, but they each had another glass of wine followed by tea, both of them reluctant to let the evening end. It seemed odd — and sad, if she was completely honest with herself — to think that this might be the last time she might ever see Stella. But, eventually, they paid for their meals and went out into the chill damp of the fall London air.
"Do you want to get a taxi?" Stella asked as Scully finished buttoning her long overcoat just outside the restaurant. They had walked the twenty or so blocks here earlier, but it was colder and drearier now that night had fallen.
"I'd rather walk, if it's okay with you. After being cramped up in those awful chairs, I think my muscles would appreciate the stretch. Were you planning to come back to the hotel or were you going to catch a cab here?" Scully asked.
"I'll walk back with you. I'm sure my muscles would appreciate the stretch as well."
They walked a few blocks without speaking, Scully still somewhat in awe of the history and architecture of the buildings around them. It would be strange to have grown up here, to take it for granted that they were walking through a city with layers upon layers of historical significance everywhere you looked — rulers, poets, artists, scientists... How many feet over thousands of years had walked over the same ground that she was walking on right this moment?
She cast a sideways glance at Stella, admiring her profile. She so clearly belonged here. Like an extension of the city itself. Strong. Confident. Layered. Scully looked straight ahead for a handful of steps before glancing to the side once more, this time contemplating the slope down the angle of her jaw to the pale line of her throat. She was beautiful in a way that simply was, an infallible argument. Stella turned her head to meet her gaze, and there was a sudden bloom of affection in her eyes that made Scully turn away quickly, embarrassed at being caught out as she felt herself blush.
"Just so you're aware," Stella said after a moment, looking over at her once more, "I like you, Dana. Very much." Her words were matter of fact. A statement. An opening.
The blush that had begun to fade blossomed once more beneath her skin like a cherry blossom dropping its petals. She felt a little like the flower-strewn branch, trembling in the breeze.
"I like you, too," Scully answered, meeting her eyes with determination. She was never one to back down due to nerves. "I've really enjoyed our time together. If you're free another day this week and wanted to meet up again, I would love to."
"Actually…" Stella stopped and fully turned to face her. "Would you be interested in going to Edinburgh together, seeing as we're both at loose ends for the next few days?"
Scully was sure the surprise was more than evident on her face as her eyes widened.
"Not what you expected?" Stella gave a small smile and then took Scully's arm in her own as they began walking again. "Think about it tonight and let me know. My appointment tomorrow should be over by ten. We could meet at King's Cross station and likely be in Edinburgh by three or four."
Scully mulled the idea over as they walked, her initial shock waning and turning to something that was more like… excitement. The more she thought about it, the more the idea appealed to her. It would be nice to be there with someone who knew the city, and she felt at ease in Stella's company. She'd like the chance to spend more time with her…
By the time they'd reached the hotel, she'd made up her mind.
As they stopped near the glass doors of the front entrance, Scully paused and said, as casually as she could, "So, I'll see you tomorrow at King's Cross station. We can plan for around eleven, to give you time to get there in case your appointment runs over?"
Stella took her in for a breath and then broke out in a surprised smile that made Scully flush with an unexpected warmth, happiness like a shot of brandy burning down her throat and spreading heat into her limbs, her fingers, her toes.
"Wouldn't miss it," Stella said quietly. "I'll book us a hotel, nothing extravagant, but something nice."
"That sounds great."
They were still standing close together, Stella's arm intertwined with her own, and Scully could feel her heart flitting about inside her chest like a caged songbird. She didn't move as Stella leaned in and kissed her gently on the mouth, a fleetingly soft touch like the brush of a bird's wing in flight.
"Good night, Dana. I'll see you tomorrow."
Scully nodded, fighting the urge to touch her fingers to her lips. It had been a fraction of a second, but it felt as though someone had neatly turned her over like upending an hourglass.
"Good night."
Stella released her arm and walked towards the taxis lined up on the street in front of the hotel, giving a nonchalant nod to the driver as he opened the back door for her to step inside. Scully was still standing there as the cab drove away, watching Stella's hand raise in farewell from behind the glass of the window.
"Mulder."
"Hey, it's me." She twisted the curls of the phone cord between her fingers, trying to not sound too pleased at the sound of his voice. It had been easy to justify the phone call to herself — it was only fair to let him know where she was going in case something urgent came up.
"Hey, Scully." His tone brightened noticeably. "How's London? How's the conference going?"
"It's been good. Wet. It rained most of yesterday, but today it's been this foggy drizzle that sort of hangs there in the air, like you're perpetually walking through a rain cloud."
He chuckled. "I know exactly what you mean. I think I spent most of my time at Oxford continuously damp. So, have you decided what you're going to do with your last few days? Big Ben? Buckingham Palace? You know, the Tower of London is supposed to be one of the most haunted—"
"I'm going to Edinburgh."
"Oh, yeah? I've never been. Heard it's a beautiful city though."
She felt a flush creep into her cheeks at the memory of Stella's feather-light kiss and cleared her throat. "Yeah, I'm looking forward to a few more days without Kersh. Speaking of, how are things at the office?"
"How do you think?" He made a grumble of disgust and she could hear the squeak of his leather couch as he adjusted his position. "The usual bullshit. But I have been making some progress with cross-referencing the fragments of files we pulled out of the office after the fire and the stuff you and I had backed up on our laptops." There was the quiet crack of a sunflower seed. "The Gunmen have this new scanning software that they think can…"
Scully leaned back against the headboard and listened to Mulder talk, throwing in the odd hum of agreement and asking questions. She had already changed into her pajamas and had her legs tucked up under the blankets. It almost felt like they were on a case, with Mulder excitedly working through theories while she studied crime scene photos until her eyes were too heavy to keep open.
"You still awake there, Scully?" She could hear the amusement in his voice. "You're awfully quiet."
"I'm awake." Her eyes were closed, and she was comfortable and warm.
"Sure, you are." She could picture the way his eyes always crinkled at the corners when he teased her. "Get some sleep already, would you?"
"You, too," she murmured. "What time is it there anyway?"
"Almost seven. Just finished my delicious dinner of microwaved leftover cashew chicken and beef lo mein and then Plan 9 From Outer Space is on at eight. Livin' the dream, Scully. Livin' the dream."
"Hmm," she agreed. "Sounds like it."
"Have a good time in Scotland and I'll see you when you get back."
"Okay." She yawned. "Night, Mulder."
"Sweet dreams, Scully."
With the warm memory of his voice in her ear, she rolled over and the set the phone back into the cradle on the base before clicking off the bedside lamp and cocooning herself up under the thick quilt. She was fast asleep within minutes, long before she had a chance to ask herself why she hadn't told Mulder about Stella and the fact that she wasn't going to Edinburgh alone.
Extra super special thanks to Josie Lange for being the best beta ever and catching all of my stupid mistakes! :D