Author's Note: Thank you, A Star In My Universe, Jojolierre, Unnamed Guest, and Shirayuki55 for the very kind reviews on the first one-shot. I highly appreciate that. Anyway, as you can see, I've decided to go ahead and turn this into a season six one-shot collection. I, unfortunately, was not impressed with season six and therefore plan to work out my frustration through writing. I just don't understand why the writers can't see that Lorna and Nicky need each other. Why can't these two be happy together already? Jesus. So infuriating. Anyway, sorry for the little outburst. Here's the second one-shot. Inspired by the last episode where they just had to - once again - separate my most favorite couple. And at the worst damn time, of course. So, I had to write something better for my own piece of mind. Feel free to review, I always love those :)
Dimming Light
"Hangin' in there, kid?" Nicky inquiries, hovering by the closet door, with worried brown eyes. The hustle and bustle of women running through the hall for the kickball tournament can easily be heard through the slight crack that's held in place by the redhead. She shakes her head; this entire feud between two sisters could get all of them killed, she thinks, and that's not something she can let happen to Lorna—the woman she loves with everything in her. There's no way she can allow Lorna anywhere near that deadly game.
Holding onto her growing baby-bump, Lorna nods her head. For the past several hours, small waves of pain coursed through her abdomen and it only seems to continue now. She deems that the perfect reason to hide-out from the game. Not only does she not want to cause injury to her unborn baby, but she also doesn't want to take the chance that Nicky's suspicion is right—that they all ended in a lethal war over two sister's hatred towards one another.
"Aren't they gonna wonder where we are, Nicky? Is this a good idea?" Lorna throws out her own questions, leaning against the sink and accidently causing one of the mops to fall to the floor—making a noticeable clunk against the hard floor. Immediately, out of fear, she covers her mouth and gives an apologetic glance towards the older woman.
A faint, "who's there?", can be heard from the other side of the door. Nicky tenses, glancing between it and Lorna. She sighs when the person seems to be walking closer to their hide-out spot. "It's better than you going out there and risking yours and the baby's life," her voice shakily whispers as she sticks up one of her fingers and places it over her mouth to keep the other quiet.
"Stay here and keep quiet. I'll go see who's out there. I'll be back," she informs her, nearly opening the closet's door when a shaky hand grabs onto her shoulder.
"No, Nicky, I-I'm not gonna risk losing you again," Lorna cries out, holding tightly onto the taller woman's limb. Tears run heavily down her cheeks as her brown eyes gaze strongly up into Nicky's. "If-if you go, I go. I-I can't risk being without you, hon."
Shaking her head, Nicky pulls her in for a quick hug and presses a tender kiss to her forehead. "No, Lorna, you need to stay here. It's too dangerous—ya got a baby to think about, doll. I'm not letting you or Carmine get hurt. I'm just gonna go see who's out there and I'll be right back. I promise. It's gonna be okay. Please stay here," she whispers, her breath trickling softly over the shorter woman's trembling lips. A sigh escapes her as she wipes at the tears, moving strands of hair away from her eyes. "I'm gonna come back, baby, I promise. I love you—that's why I need you not to come. I can't let you go out there and risk anything."
Before the Italian inmate has the chance to argue, she watches lugubriously as Nicky creaks her way out of the closet and shuts the door behind her. As if on que, the pain in her abdomen intensifies enough to double her over—arms pressed tight against the protruding bump, trying to somehow stop it. "Please," she pants, out of breath and strained from the sobs, "stay inside, kitten, it's too early."
"What the hell were ya doing in the closet, Nichols? Skimping out on the kickball tournament? I knew you were trying to fuck with Barb's plan," Annalisa furiously comes up to her, rage flashing in her orbs. She corners her against the wall and peers menacingly down at her. Her head shakes with fiery; she knew the redhead couldn't be trusted and loathes that Barb got sucked into her trap.
A nervous chuckle escapes. Nicky tries to subtly move away from the other's fierce hold on her but quickly regrets such decision when a shiv comes in contact with her cheek. She yelps in pain. "The fuck was that about? Jesus Christ," she mutters, holding her hand over her now lightly bleeding cheek. "I was just, uh, looking for more weapons—ya know to help us out? Why aren't you on the field already, huh? Maybe you're the one who's skimping out."
The blonde throws the homemade stabbing device into her shirt pocket and folds her arms over her chest. She glares darkly at Nicky, shaking her head in disbelief. "Yeah, I'm sure. You're the one who fucking sabotaged the salon plan—why the hell should I believe you're not going to do some shit to fuck this up too, huh? Barb may be an oblivious idiot but I'm sure as fuck not."
"Look, I'm not planning to do anything but play the damn game. Now, can we just get the fuck out there before it starts?" She watches as Annalisa cautiously follows the crowd of inmates towards the outside doors—hoping to escape back to the closet, but such luck is whisked away when she feels herself being pulled along. A breath of air expels from her lungs as she shuts her eyes. She hopes that this doesn't end badly. She promised Lorna she'd come back and there's no way she wants to break that.
The pain only continues to worsen. Lorna stumbles to the door, opening it, and walks—bent over—through the hall in search of Nicky. Tears pour down her cheeks heavily, even more so when it seems a large heap of water gushes out from the bottom of her khakis. The sensation causes a piercing cry to escape from her throat. "No, no, no," her voice shakes, "No, you-you can't come out yet…please, little baby, it-it's too early. Stay inside." She tries to bargain with her unborn child, holding onto the bump fiercely, until the contractions get so strong that she tumbles to the ground.
"Oh, shit, Lorna," a familiar lightly-accented voice rings through the bustling hallway. It's not Nicky's, the distressed brunette sadly realizes, but—she thinks—at least it's someone she feels safe with. "What happened to ya? You're bleeding—someone try to shank ya or something?"
With the small amount of strength that she has left, Lorna forces herself to look up at who's come to her rescue. A sad sigh escapes her to find that it's only Flaca and Cindy—who, no doubt, are on their way to the field to broadcast the tournament—crouched down beside her. She shakes her head as a loud sob heaves out of her. "My, my water broke. The baby—it's too early, I can't-I can't give birth now," her eyes focus on the inmates running past them—how she longs to run out those doors to Nicky, she sniffles.
"The baby's got shit timing," Cindy mutters, gaining a light slap on the shoulder from Flaca. She sighs and looks down at the clearly-in-pain Italian inmate with empathetic eyes. "We'll get ya to a CO—if your water broke, there's no way to stop the birth. It's too late. I'm sorry."
Shaking her head, the tall Hispanic woman throws her arms up in the air to make a point. "Ain't no guards around—they're all out waiting for the game to start. I think we're gonna have to deliver this baby ourselves, Cindy," she informs, motioning at the nearly empty hallway now. A lump sits in her throat. She swallows uncomfortably and gazes down at Lorna, "How close are the contraction things?"
"I am not giving birth in a fucking prison," the brunette angrily sobs out, holding her stomach protectively. Another sharp pain tears through her, she screams out in agony and slams a fist against the tile floor beneath her. "I-I can't—it's too soon for him. Ya have to stay inside," she cries, looking down at her bump with pleading orbs.
"It's either ya give birth or you bleed to death. That baby is ready to come out—he doesn't know whether he's early or late. We can take you to a closet for privacy but Flaca's right—we're gonna have to deliver that baby here."
"Nicky," Lorna sobs out, pushing herself to stand up. "I need Nicky. Please."
The other two inmates share a look and nod. Cindy, the taller of the two, takes on the task of carefully scooping up Lorna and carrying her to a vacant custodial closet while Flaca hurries out to the field to find Nicky.
It's proving hard to concentrate on the tournament when all Nicky can think about is how Lorna's faring in the closet. The stares from Annalisa slightly help to keep her focused—the last thing she wants is another cut to her cheek. When their teams are mix-matched with inmates from the other cell-block, she feels a bout of relief wash over. Maybe, she internalizes, there's a glimmer of hope that this won't turn out to be a deadly match of kickball.
After kicking the ball, she runs towards first-base where she's immediately tagged by a member of the other team. Without much care, she walks over to the sideline and watches the next kicker. A few minutes later, however, she's brought out of her daze by a frantic Flaca's running up to her. Eyebrows arched in wonder, Nicky looks up at her. "What's wrong with you?"
"Lorna," the Hispanic girl mutters, breathing heavy from running so fast. She sucks in a large breath to combat the lack of air. "Ya have to come with me; Cindy and I were on our way out when we saw her struggling to stand up—her water broke, Nicky. She's in labor and she wants you to be with her."
Her chest tightens at that. Nicky swallows thickly, looking around the field to find a way to escape without being caught. "She's in labor? Why didn't you fucking get a damn guard? What the hell? How am I gonna get outta here without anyone noticing?"
Flaca gestures to the COs around them and shakes her head. "They're all out here—more interested in this game than the well-being of their inmates, obviously. We can find a way to distract them—maybe, Vause can help us out, ya think?"
Nodding agreeably, Nicky quickly searches the field for the tall black-haired inmate. When she finally catches a glimpse of her guarding second base, she makes a v-line over to her. "Vause," she whispers, tapping her impatiently on the shoulder.
"Huh?" Alex turns, mercilessly bored of the game, and stares at the shorter inmate with intrigued eyes. "Even know who's in the lead in this damn thing?"
"Don't know nor do I give a fuck about the game. I came over because I need your help."
Quirking an eyebrow, the darker-haired woman folds her arms over her chest. "Yeah? With what?"
Nicky gulps uneasily. She hopes that they'll be able to pull something off. The pure thought of Lorna's enduring a painful birth in a prison closet makes her insides churn distastefully. "Can ya find a way to distract the guards and both teams? I-I need to get inside…apparently Lorna's in labor and she needs me, Vause. I promised her I'd come back and I wanna keep that."
"Shit. Of course, I'll do my best to do what I can to help. Isn't she a little early to be having that baby, though?"
"Seven months. I-I don't know if the baby will make it but I'll be fucking damned if anything happens to Lorna—no way will I let her leave me. I love that woman too much to lose her," she says, a few tears rolling along her cheeks—the saltiness making the cut on her right one hurt worse. A sharp breath she inhales to keep her from falling apart. She forces a grateful smile to her face, "Thanks for helping me out, Alex—means a lot."
Placing a comforting hand to her shoulder, Alex gives a sympathetic smile in return and shrugs her shoulders. "Eh, it's the least I can do after the wedding you and Lorna had for me and Pipes. I hope everything's okay with her—we all know how excited she's been for the baby…can't imagine what it'll do to her if anything goes wrong."
Fortunately there's no time to continue the conversation as Nicky intently watches the black-haired woman run towards the mid-air ball, standing in its path so that her head is the target. A light chuckle comes tumbling from her throat before she makes her escape, running quickly behind Flaca towards the very doors they came out from. She looks back, momentarily, to see everyone crowding around Alex—inmates grunting out in frustration and guards laughing in amusement. She'll have to remember to do something nice for her later on; it's not often a person would willingly get hit in the head just to help her, she knows.
"Ya know back before I got arrested, I watched my cousin Jamal's girlfriend give birth on the back seat of his car on the way to the hospital," Cindy tries to distract Lorna from the pain with amusing stories of her past life. A slight look of disgust, at the memory, washes over face momentarily as she shakes her head with a faint laugh. That's something she could never rid from her mind with how vivid it was. "She really shouldn'ta ate that last bite of burrito. That was not a pretty mess to clean up."
The door's screeching open immediately gains Lorna's attention. When she sees Nicky walk in behind Flaca, the pain becomes a little more tolerable. Tears come heavily down her face. "Nicky," her voice cracks as she holds out her arms for the redhead.
The sight of Lorna in her current condition shatters Nicky's heart tremendously. It's only a matter of seconds before she's sitting on the floor beside her, pulling her to lay up against her softly beating chest. She rests her chin lovingly atop her head of brown hair. "I'm here, kid. It's all gonna be okay—I've got ya. Shh, shh," her voice soothes while a hand strokes comfortingly against her teary cheek.
"No, Nicky, it's-it's not okay. The baby—he's not ready," Lorna chokes out, gripping her hand tightly over each of the taller woman's wrists—the only thing that seems to help from the immense pain. "Pregnancies are nine months…n-not seven, isn't that right?"
"Yes, baby, that's right. But sometimes, sometimes babies are ready earlier. Obviously, little Carmine in there is tired of floating around all day and wants to meet her mommy. Don't cry, Lorna, everything's okay. I'm here with you. You're gonna be fine."
Lorna shakes her head fiercely and turns slightly to stare piercingly up into Nicky's warm orbs. "I don't care about me, hon—what I want is for my baby to be okay, and he's not. He's not gonna be okay because I'm only seven fucking months. There's blood coming out—a healthy birth wouldn't be bloody like that, would it? I'm not giving birth to-to a healthy baby. Don't sugarcoat things now, Nicky. Please. Be honest like you always are."
Cradling the brunette's face in her hands, a faint sob etches through Nicky's throat. The pain so clearly heard from her voice is enough to ruin the redhead for good. She swallows thickly and inhales a sharp breath. "I don't know, kid. I don't know if the baby's gonna be okay or not. I'm so sorry, baby. I know—I know how much you've wanted to be a mommy and-and now ya might have that ripped away. I hope everything works out but—if you're bleeding…that's not a good sign," she whispers, stroking a kiss against Lorna's damp cheek.
An overpowering contraction interrupts the conversation causing Lorna to nearly convulse from how much pain it leaves her in. She screams out horrifically, wanting nothing more than to go back to the day before when her baby was safe inside her womb.
"I think we're gonna have to deliver this baby like now," Flaca intervenes, positioning herself near Lorna's legs and situating them in the birthing pose she remembers seeing from the one time she watched her friend deliver a relative's baby.
Lorna's eyes widen in fear. She shakes her head profusely, grabbing onto Nicky as tight as humanly possible. "I'm not giving birth in a prison closet," she sniffles.
Holding her head snugly against her heart, Nicky smothers soft kisses all over it in the hopes of bringing her some comfort. "Shh, shh. It's okay, I'm here to get ya through this. It's all gonna be okay, doll. You can do this, you're so strong and beautiful," her words murmur lovingly into Lorna's ear. She lifts her head slightly to stare over at Flaca with skeptical eyes. "Are ya sure ya know what the hell you're doing? I doubt you've ever delivered a baby before."
"In fact, I observed a baby delivery very closely. My friend had to help her aunt give birth in the back of her car on our way to the prom back in high school. I know exactly what the hell I'm doing. Don't worry about it—just, uh, keep Lorna calm."
Cindy perks up at that, standing behind her with piqued interest. "No way—I witnessed a backseat car delivery too, bitch. Small world, ain't it? Don't worry, Morello, you're in good hands…we both know how to get a baby outta your vajayjay, no worries."
Nicky rolls her eyes, keeping her loving hold on Lorna's head and stares at the other women with quirked eyebrows. "The hell kinda friends did ya two have out there? Nah, I don't wanna know. Just be gentle with my Lorna. Poor thing's in enough pain as it is," she mutters, a stray tear leaking down her face at the pure discomfort the woman she loves is experiencing. Her arms do their best to shield her from the harsh reality of the real world. "Close your eyes and just breathe. It'll be over soon, doll. You'll be a mom in less than ten minutes, just think of that."
"Oh, Jesus," Flaca yells out when she realizes the baby's head popping out. She holds a hand over her mouth to keep it together. "Ya gotta give a real good push—I see the head, Lorna. Push as hard as ya can!"
Squeezing her eyes tightly shut, Lorna grunts out painfully as she does her best to push her body. "Ahhh—make the hell stop," she screams, pushing harder and harder until she feels the release of all pressure and pain. More tears fall from her eyes, she doesn't open them. The fading pain is a strong relief but the absent sound of a baby's cry alarms her immensely.
Nicky looks over at the others with a worried expression etched on her face. The fallen miens confirms her worst suspicion. She swallows hard, motioning for them to bring her the baby. When the lifeless bundle is placed in her arms, she shakes her head sadly and presses a delicate kiss over Lorna's forehead.
"Can ya give Lorna and I some privacy, please?" She watches solemnly as they oblige and walk quickly out of the closet. A small sigh escapes her as she waits for Lorna to open her eyes. When she doesn't, Nicky places the permanently sleeping newborn into her arms and wraps both of hers tight around the petite brunette.
"Open your eyes, my doll, please. Look at your daughter. Yes, it's a girl. She looks just like you, pretty girl."
Lorna's heart aches in her chest. She slowly opens her eyes to stare down at the baby in her arms. The sight of her immediately causes a painful wrack of sobs to shake through her body. "She's sleeping—Nicky, look, she's just—she's just sleeping. That's why she didn't cry, she's too tired. Pretty little Carmine," she smiles brokenly, hugging the lifeless baby tight against her chest.
Combing a hand through her hair, the innocence that comes from Lorna's small voice easily causes a fountain of tears to pour from her own eyes. Nicky shakes her head sadly, kissing her head continuously. "Yeah, baby, she's sleeping…forever," her voice cracks; it's proving to be quite the chore to keep herself together—how can she with how disoriented the birth and pain has caused Lorna. She lets out another sharp breath. "Lorna, my sweet love, Carmine's not gonna wake up. She's, she's dead, kid. You, you were right that-that something was wrong and I-I'm so sorry."
"No, no. I was wrong. She's perfectly fine, Nicky. Look at her. She's healthy and sleeping and so beautiful. She's gonna be okay and so am I. We're both okay," Lorna states, rocking the baby softly against her. She bites her lip, trying to stay positive. Her baby isn't dead. She didn't give birth to a dead baby, she tells herself. But when she stares down at the newborn, she can easily tell that the baby she's holding isn't just asleep. And such realization only rips a large hole in her heart.
Sobs heave through her. Everything in her slowly turns to Jell-O, causing her to collapse against the cold floor.
Instantly, Nicky takes the broken woman into her strong arms and lays her back up on her chest. She nuzzles her chin lovingly over top of her head, sniffles lightly coming out of her own throat at this point. Lorna's pain is her pain. "Shh, shh. I'm right here. I got ya, sweetie, I got ya. You're not alone, okay? You got me to help ya through this. I know it hurts—it hurts like hell, I know, my love. But you'll get through this, I promise. You're with me and I'm gonna do whatever I can for you. Whatever you need, you just tell me. It's gonna be okay," she soothes softly into the other's ear, rocking her softly in her arms. Kisses are pressed lovingly against her head.
"I-I'm not gonna be okay, hon. I-I lost my child. My heart is empty and-and so numb. I don't—I don't think I'll ever get past this."
"Oh, Lorna…baby, I know it feels that way now, but that's not gonna be forever. Please, doll, you're gonna get past this—I'm gonna be right by your side through all of this, I promise. I love you so much, kid, and all I want is to make you feel better," Nicky assures, tightening her hold on the trembling brunette.
The sobs that are felt only strengthens the ache in her own heart. It's the worst thing in the world to see the woman her heart beats for in this much pain. How she longs to make this better—to bring Lorna's baby back for her. She sighs, shaking her head and focuses her energy on bringing her any comfort she can. "It's gonna be a hard few months—maybe longer—but I promise you that you'll get through this pain. I'll make sure of that. I will never leave you. I'll be right here to comfort you in any way you want me to. I'll hold ya all day every day if that's what makes you feel even halfway better. I don't care. Whatever makes you feel better, I'll do. Please, my baby, please don't be afraid to ask me for comfort, yeah? I love you so damn much; I wanna get through this with you. You won't be the same person you were before, that's true, but you'll come out stronger for enduring this painful tragedy. I know you will."
Letting out another sigh, Nicky leans up against the wall and maneuvers Lorna into a more comfortable position against her body. She takes off her jacket and wraps it around the two of them to keep them as close as their bodies can be to one another. A loving kiss is dropped to the top of the smaller woman's head. "It's all gonna be okay. You just wait and see, baby."