So sorry about the wait guys, college started back up again so ive been distracted with classes. Updates may not be as often so be prepared for it.
POV Arnold
I was always accused of being dense. I am ashamed to say that in the sixth grade I never really noticed how bad she had gotten. I would make little comments to Gerald about how mean she was on a particular day. I even noticed a change. But I was never smart enough to connect the dots.
I shook my head. How could I be so stupid? I'm agonizing over something I saw, something that didn't even happen to me personally. Yet she is over here, living with something this tough. Something that she had to go through without help, but from one person. Maybe the therapist is a good choice
Helga Pataki is one strong girl. I used to think this when I was a kid, noticing all the little things she endured. Her dad not remembering her name, her mom being a drunk. And to add this on top of everything? It's no wonder she relied on self harm.
"Hey, Helga?" she gave me a questioning look. She had become an amazing person over the years. Smart, kind, still super fiesty. I never realized how much I truly relied on her. "Can... can I see your scars?"
She stared off in space for a minute. Just as I began to wonder if I had made a mistake in asking, she heaved a deep sigh. "Yeah, Arnoldo. I think you should. Don't freak out though. I have a couple different spots, and I have to take off my shirt." With another sigh, she stood up, and pulled her short sleeve shirt over her head. Underneath she wore a simple pastel pink bra. But what caught my attention almost instantly were the multitude of scar right underneath ger right breast. There had to be dozens of scars there. The extended down a few inches but never traveled past where it was too dangerous. They were pale and almost hidden. If I had not been looking for them I would not have seen them for another minute or so.
I stared up at her, awed. How could I not have noticed this? "How could I have been any worse of a friend?"
"Excuse me? That's what you got from this? That's not why I showed you. Look at this." She turned to the side and I noticed more on her lower hip, easily hidden by jeans, which she had to pull down a bit. "I'm showing you this because you need to see that you can accept peoples help. I didn't accept anyone's help and this is what it got me. A lifetime of visual reminders. You don't want this. Trust me. You don't want to get to this point. Because it helps for a little bit but it doesn't last. The pain comes back, harder than before. You cut deeper, because the shallow cuts don't help anymore. Those don't hurt anymore. Promise me. Please? I'm begging you. Go see her before it's too late.
I had already decided. "I promise."
POV Helga
Relief flooded me. When he had asked me to see my scars I froze. Only Bliss had seen my scars, and the occasional doctor. But I knew what I had to do. He had to see them. He had to see how bad it can become. That no one is immune. I heaved a heavy sigh, and fell back onto the couch, forgetting I was in my bra. I had my eyes closed so I was startled to feel a slight touch to my skin.
Arnold was leaning in close, his fingers trailing the scars under my breast. My whole body nearly shivered from the feeling. I never let anyone touch them. I was always afraid of memories resurfacing. But when he did it, it wasn't bad memories that resurfaced. It was a desire I had suppressed until he came back, triggering it all over again. I had been distracted from it the past few days, trying to help him. But now, it wasn't a distraction. It was in the forefront of my mind. I cleared my throat. If he kept this up we'd both be in trouble.
Arnold started. "Oh damn. I'm sorry. It was kind of reflex. I didn't mean to do that." If only you knew. I shook the thought away. I should not have been effected that badly. But when I looked at hi, his face was cherry red and he was struggling not to look at me.
"Why don't we make some lunch?" He nodded, and I was a little unsure of how to feel about the relief that flooded his expression. "Homemade pizza and we can just eat leftovers from the fridge for dinner. I don't have the mental capacity right now to cook three times a day.
"I can cook if you want me too. I know a recipe for a killer pizza. It was grandpa's recipe actually." I smiled at that. I remember them vividly. They had become like a second family to me, those two. Grandma never stopped calling me Elenor and I was beyond thankful Arnold never figured out why. He ended up chalking it up to one of grandma's quirks. I guess in a way it was, but it was one I was ok with. For the most part. She had a wild side to match my own.
It broke both Arnold and I when they passed away. Grandpa had passed away in his sleep, like he thought would happen when we were kids. Grandma, well she was a mystery to be honest. I wasn't sure how she died. It was soon after Grandpa had passed, so I think she was feeling a bit too much grief. To lose someone you've been in love with and around for over sixty years would break anyone. I watched Arnold as he cooked, and my heart nearly shattered at the thought of losing him for good. I was well and truly in love with him. I don't think I'd ever be happy with anyone else. He rounded out my sharp edges, the ones I've yet to smooth out, ones that were now impossible to smooth out.
As I watched him cook, I came to a realization, one I was sure I knew all along, but was a bit too stubborn to acknowledge. I would give my life up for him if I knew it would make him happy again. If it would keep the darkness that was only slightly lighter, at bay. Because that's what I was here for. To help the boy who gave everything up to help everyone around him. I existed to help the boy who had nothing left.
Ok guys, so just remember my updates are gonna a little longer in between updates because of school. A combo of japanese and math is a bit of a time consuming one lol. But I think I'm gonna try and wrap this up in a few chapters. If y'all have any input or ideas or anything, leave a review and ill definatly look into any suggestion! Thanks for reading everyone!