7.01 Demons
A loud ringing of a cellphone was the only noise in the bedroom. Two lovers stirred under the covers, trying to block out of the sound. Elliot put a pillow over his head and groaned loudly.
"But we have the day off," Olivia whined.
"I don't care, what it is, I'm not going in," Elliot said confidently.
Olivia rolled halfway over him and picked up the phone ringing annoyingly; looking at the caller-ID she made a noise in the back of her throat, before answering.
"Yeah, Captain," she mumbled.
"Olivia? I thought I called Elliot, but I guess I dialed you instead," Cragen said, surprised to hear the female detective answering.
"No, you didn't. Hang on a moment," Olivia said, still half-asleep.
She violently took the pillow from his head and handed him his phone, saying "It's yours." and rolling back, closing her eyes again.
"Stabler," he said to the phone.
"I hope I'm not interrupting, but I need you to come in. Recently paroled con might have been back to his old habits only hours after getting released," Cragen explained.
"Munch and Fin can handle it," Elliot said, not wanting to go in.
"No, it's all hands on deck," Cragen said.
"I'll be right there," Elliot said, giving up.
"Oh, and since you seem to have Olivia nearby, let her meet the vic at Bellevue," Cragen added and hang up.
Elliot grunted under his breath and threw the phone on the floor, not caring if he breaks it or not. He rolled over and wrapped his arms around Olivia.
"Cragen wants us in. He wants you to talk to the vic," he said with anger obvious in his voice.
"I knew a free day was too beautiful to be true," she said, disappointedly.
"Plus I think he knows about our relationship," he added.
"You think?" she asked sarcastically.
"Guess it had to come out eventually," Elliot said.
"After all it's been going on for a long time," Olivia agreed.
Elliot said something unintelligible and turned Olivia in his arms, coming face to face with her.
"You know that I love you, right, no matter, what Cragen will do with us," Elliot said sincerely.
"I love you too," she replied.
She raised her head meeting his lips with hers, but Elliot pinned her down with his body, trapping her underneath him. She used the strength she had to roll them over, so she ended up on top of him. They broke apart, when the need for oxygen couldn't be ignored any longer. After catching her breath Olivia gave him another quick kiss on the lips before rolling off of him and leaving the bed.
"I'll take a quick shower," she announced.
"I'll make coffee," he said automatically.
It was part of their routine since Elliot started spending most of his nights at Olivia's. He got himself an apartment close by, but he rarely spent nights there, much less days. Kathy and kids moved back to the family house in the Queens, when Elliot said that he moved out – Kathy and kids needed more space anyway, beside he was never home anyway – most of the nights he was shifting between the crib and Olivia's apartment.
When Olivia came out of the shower, the whole apartment was filled with the scent of fresh coffee and toast. Elliot was already eating, so Olivia came up behind him and wrapped her arms around him. He handed her a cup of coffee, but otherwise kept his attention on the newspaper.
"You smell good," he commented.
"Must be the lavender from my conditioner," she said easily.
"Mmm, I like it," he said, turning his head at her.
Olivia smiled and kissed his cheek before drinking her coffee.
"Something new?" she asked, referring to the newspaper.
"Something new, but nothing interesting," he replied smartly.
"Okay. Well, I'm gonna get dressed," she said, noticing he was already in his work attire.
He mumbled in understanding, finishing off his coffee.
Olivia got changed quickly, dried and fixed her hair while finishing her coffee. Elliot was already waiting by the door, when she exited the bedroom. She grabbed her toast along with her handbag, took her time to fix Elliot's tie and they left the apartment mere 30 minutes after Cragen had called.
"I'll drop you off at the Bellevue," Elliot said while walking down the stairs.
"Okay," she said, munching on her toast.
"And later you can call me to pick you up, so we can talk to Cragen," he continued.
"Sounds like we have a plan," Olivia said after swallowing a mouthful.
"Yep," he responded with putting his hand on the small of her back.
The drive to hospital was quiet. Olivia grabbed her notepad and phone from the bag, letting Elliot take it back to precinct. He kissed her goodbye before parting.
On the way to precinct Elliot thought about how they were going to break the news to Cragen and others, but he really came up empty hoping Olivia had a plan, she usually had one. He parked in his usual spot, took Olivia's handbag and absentmindedly got to the squadroom. He placed Olivia's belongings to her desk casually, but before he could do anything else Cragen came out of his office barking orders.
"Okay, I assume Benson is taking our victim's statement by now, Munch, Fin – go over his MO and find me something to tie him to this case, Stabler – William Dorsey is in the conference room, he has been on his case longer, get whatever you can," he said and looked as his detectives, who started carrying out their assignments instantly.
Later they briefed Cragen of all they got, planning their next move. He sent Munch and Fin away, so he could talk to Elliot alone.
"Elliot, we need to talk," he said, sitting down behind his desk.
"I know," Elliot said, taking a seat opposite to his Captain.
"I've made a point not to get involved with my detective's personal lives. I honestly don't care what you do once you leave work, but I think this time I have to make an exception," Cragen said seriously.
"I understand. We didn't mean for you to find out like this. We were waiting for the right moment to tell you," Elliot started explaining.
"I'm sure you did. How long has this been going on?" Cragen asked out of curiosity.
"Close to year," Elliot said, counting back. They first ended up together on a little before his birthday, which makes it October last year.
"And no-one knows about it or was I the only one out of loop?" Cragen asked in surprise.
"We've kept it as a secret," Elliot assured his boss.
"All right. I hope you understand, that I have to notify 1-PP and IAB about this," Cragen said, getting back to serious.
"Yeah, we know," Elliot said, speaking for Olivia too, but they both knew about the consequences.
"Good. As for me, as long as you keep it out of the office, I don't see a problem, specially when it has been going on for so long and it hasn't affected your performance in any way, but there is a chance that I have to separate you two, possibly even transfer one of you out of the unit," Cragen explained.
"We have talked about that possibility," Elliot said knowingly.
"One more thing, Elliot. You know we spend a lot of time together in the squadroom and we all become close. Olivia is like a daughter to me and I don't wanna see you breaking her heart. Take this as a warning – you break her heart, I break your neck. Are we clear?" Cragen threatened Elliot.
"Clear as a crystal. I have no intentions of breaking Liv's heart, I don't think I could ever do that. I'm in love with her, Captain, so you don't have to worry about that," Elliot said, trying to make his intentions clear to Cragen
"Good. Go pick up Ray's old case files from 1-PP, I'll send Fin and Olivia to pick up Ray," Cragen said, letting him know, that the conversation is over.
Elliot grabbed his jacket and took the elevator downstairs, where he bumped into Olivia.
"I thought you were going to call me," he said.
"An officer dropped me off," she said.
"Okay. I just hope he isn't doing more than that, because I am a jealous guy," Elliot said with a smile.
Olivia let out a laugh at the statement, playfully hitting his chest.
"So, we're gonna talk to Cragen or what?" Olivia asked, wincing slightly.
"Nope, we already talked. He'll notify some guys but other than that he was very understanding," Elliot said, leaving the threat out.
"Oh, that's good," Olivia said in surprise. She was expecting a lecture.
Elliot nod.
The elevator doors closed after them and Olivia pressed the button to get to the squadroom.
Elliot pulled her into his embrace, locking his lips with hers, needing that moment of contact before heading out. Today was supposed to be their 24 hours of interrupted time together after all.
They broke apart, when the elevator stopped and Olivia got out.
"See you later," he said.
"See you," Olivia said her goodbye.
Elliot rode the elevator down with a smile on his face. Maybe letting everybody know about their relationship was going to work out well after all. Most of the people were thinking they have been sleeping together much longer anyway and he was well aware of all the bets going around in the office. He also has been asked many times if Olivia was seeing someone and his answer has always been yes to save those poor guys from being turned down by the one and only Olivia Benson.
***SVU***
When Cragen told Olivia about Elliot's undercover operation, she rushed to her apartment only to hear noise coming from the bedroom. Olivia dropped her keys and bag before she made her way over to him, sitting on the edge of the bed. He greeted her absentmindedly, looking for clothes to pack along.
"Thanks for the heads up," she said sarcastically.
"Sorry, it happened in a spite of moment. I trusted Cragen to tell you," he apologized.
"He told me. So you're leaving tonight?" Olivia asked.
"Yeah. They put me in the same halfway house as Ray, I'm hoping to make contact and then get into his good grades," Elliot explained.
"I know the drill," Olivia said, she didn't need Elliot to talk about the details – she already knew.
"Well, I still get to keep my phone, so I'll call you later tonight or you can call me," Elliot said.
Olivia didn't respond.
Elliot stopped going through his belongings and came to sit by Olivia.
"Honey, I know he will strike again and I will be there to stop him. It probably won't take long before this mission is over. It's gonna be okay," he told her, sensing that she is not very happy about it.
"Just give me the heads-up next time," Olivia said simply, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear.
"I will," Elliot said.
He got back to packing his bag, satisfied with the result he stood up and went to the living room, where already a box with random things was waiting for him. Olivia followed her out with her hands crossed.
"Be safe," she said.
"I'll come back to you," Elliot said with a smile.
"I truly hope that being around pedophiles don't make you one," Olivia said.
"I've been in this unit long enough," Elliot brushed off her comment.
"I'll miss you," Olivia confessed.
"I'll miss you too," Elliot replied.
He dropped his sports bag on the floor and walked over to Olivia. He kissed her passionately, fighting for dominance. Her hands slipped around his neck in practiced manner, while he wrapped his arms around her waist. As they broke apart, neither of them was willing to let go of the close contact, so they stayed in each other's embrace until he kissed her again, urgently. Elliot moved his hands from her back to her thighs, lifting her up, she wrapped her legs around his middle instantly, also in well practiced manner.
Elliot didn't think twice before walking to the bedroom and putting her down on the bed, climbing on top of her. If he had to spend possibly nights away from Olivia and instead stay with convicted sex-offenders, he needed to remember, what's waiting for him.
"El, do we have time for this?" Olivia asked, when he moved over to ravish her neck.
"I don't have curfew set, so we're good," he replied and moved to unbutton her shirt. He needed those images and feelings of Olivia fresh in his mind.
***SVU***
Elliot drove his newly bought van to marina, where Cragen and Olivia were waiting for him. He got out of the van and walked over to his co-workers.
"What's with the van?" Olivia asked.
"Ray gave me money to buy it," Elliot replied.
"That's enough to violate Ray's parole, send him back to prison," Olivia said, turning to Cragen.
"For 18 months?" Elliot asked, knowing it's not enough.
"What, you gonna give him the van?" Cragen asked about his detective's plans.
"I'm not gonna give him the keys. I'm just… giving him an opportunity," Elliot replied.
"You'd have to let Ray go far enough to charge him with attempted rape. We'd be responsible for traumatizing the girl," Cragen said, obviously not happy with the plan.
"We could use a female undercover as a decoy," Olivia offered.
"Ray likes 'em young. We just need to find a cop, who can pass for a teenager," Elliot said, agreeing with the plan.
"All right. But I want safeguards. You put all the bells and whistles on that van," Cragen said agreeing.
Olivia and Elliot both nod.
"I'll give you two a minute," Cragen decided and sat in the passenger seat of the car.
"So, how are you holding up?" Olivia asked.
"I had to talk about the urges I have for teenagers and listen to other talk about their adventures in details and not punch them in the face, but other than that, it's okay," Elliot said as if it was just another normal day.
Olivia winced at his statement, but didn't reply.
He reached for her with his left hand and pulled her in. His lips met her urgently, wanting to feel more after his confession in the therapy group, where half of the time he was thinking of her instead, making it easier to talk about his urges and now at least he had the chance to kiss and touch her, as brief as their encounter might be. He pulled away in the need of oxygen.
He hugged her, savoring the feeling as he knew well enough that it might be days before he gets to go home to her. She slipped her hands around his waist, putting his head against his shoulder. Elliot let one of his hand rest on her back, while the other ended up in her head, steadying it against him. Her hair flew in the wind, filling his senses with the familiar smell of lavender he now knew, came from her conditioner.
"I think Ray might attack soon, he seemed thrilled with the idea of a van," Elliot said.
"Maybe we could use our decoy and bust him even tonight," Olivia said.
"I'd sure as hell like that. I hate living in that halfway house that smells like dust and mold," Elliot said, ready to end his undercover mission.
"You smell like dust and mold," Olivia said, raising her eyebrow.
"You smell good," he replied.
"I have to go now," Olivia said heavily.
"I know," Elliot replied.
He released his hold on her and dropped two quick kisses on her lips before she walked away from him.
"Take care," she said turning around for a moment.
"I will," he assured her.
Elliot watched as Olivia got into the car with Cragen and he got into his van, arranging a meet with Fin and O'Halloran, so he could get the "safeguards".
Olivia and Cragen drove silently towards the all familiar precinct.
"I talked with Elliot a few days ago," Cragen said out of the blue.
"Yeah, he told me you did," Olivia said neutrally.
"I talked with IAB and 1-PP about your... situation," he elaborated.
"I'm aware of the process and the high probability that one of us has to resign," Olivia said, not wanting to face the chance of not being an SVU detective.
"We had a long talk about this, filled with possibilities, one worse than another, but in the end the Chief of D's talked to Huang, since he is a psychologist and his opinion should be considered, Huang has been working with us for years now and he has seen your relationship for a long time. I was not present during the conversation, but seems like Elliot should control his anger towards Huang, since he thinks very highly of you two," Cragen said, his voice calm as usual.
"So we both get to keep on working at SVU, but have to switch partners?" Olivia asked.
"No. Chief of D's came to me and basically ordered me not to change anything and my hands are tied. Elliot will remain as your partner, but as I was ordered to order you to keep your relationship out of the office, but the moment it starts affecting your performance, I have no choice but to suspend you and transfer one of you out," Cragen explained.
"That's great," Olivia said with a sigh of relief.
"Yes, I hope it won't come to having to separate you, because I really can't afford to lose one of my best detectives," Cragen said, having been worried about the worst case scenario since the beginning.
"It won't. We're professionals," Olivia assured her Captain.
"I hope so. I was warned, when I decided to put you two together. Seeing how close you grew with time, my boss was also a constant pain in my neck and even I started to get worried, but I'm glad that this has worked out well," Cragen talked about the way his boss questioned his choices and how he was constantly asked about the partnership.
"I guess things could have gone many ways," Olivia said, thinking of possibilities. First weeks of their partnerships had been rough, but they grew on each other with time.
"Yes," Cragen said in agreement. "Just make sure that this is not where the partnership ends, I wouldn't want to lose one of my detectives and friends over this. Don't let Elliot be the next man, whose heart you break."
Olivia simply nod and stayed silent.
The rest of their journey went discussing their current mission.
***SVU***
The rest of the mission went kind of slow. Ray walked away from their decoy, which resulted in Cragen almost pulling Elliot out, but Olivia managed to assure him that pulling Elliot out will do more bad than good. She was proven right that night.
When Elliot's drove past their halfway house and even crossed the bridge, all of them knew that something was up. Olivia and Fin were hot on their tail, but unfortunately GPS location pointed to wider area and his exact location was still unknown.
Fin requested backup and they were proven right, when a traumatized teenager crossed their path, presumably being let go by Elliot. That's when they heard gunshots, but they stopped before they could go in.
"Elliot," Olivia shouted just before the garage door opened.
"Coming out," he shouted and came out of the garage with dragging Ray's limp body, which he dropped instantly.
He met Olivia, as she was coming towards him. He lifted his still handcuffed hands and let Olivia hug him.
"I'm okay," he said, "He needs a doctor, though."
"I was so scared," she whispered.
"I know. I was too. But I'm okay," he said quietly.
Olivia released Elliot, who went on to sit on the hood of a police car. An officer uncuffed him and paramedic came to check his vitals.
Fin and Olivia looked at the scene unraveling in front of them. They watched as CSU technicians arrived and closed the crime scene down, how Ray was put on a stretcher and into ambulance, then the same ambulance driving away with sirens blaring. How another paramedic checked on Elliot, who seemed to be determined not to be checked at.
One by one police cars started driving away, one car taking their teenage girl, who Elliot set free, to the precinct for statement. Elliot left in a police car sometime, he also needed to give his statement. Soon it was only Fin and Olivia standing in a lot, which was moments ago filled with officers.
"At least we got our guy," Fin said finally.
"And almost lost Elliot and traumatized that poor girl," Olivia said.
"Elliot is not okay," Fin stated.
"No," Olivia agreed.
"Something happened between him and Ray," Fin continued.
"Or in the therapy sessions," Olivia offered.
"Probably both," Fin decided.
Olivia nod.
"But he'll be okay. You'll help him get through this," Fin said, sensing Olivia was more worried about Elliot than she let it show.
"I'm only his partner. He probably needs his kids to make it better," Olivia said.
"Are you still gonna deny everything?" Fin asked in disbelief.
"Deny what?" Olivia asked, confused for a moment.
"You and Elliot," Fin clarified.
"What?... You know?" Olivia asked, shocked.
"Liv, everybody knows," Fin said with a smile.
Olivia looked at him with wide eyes. They were trying to hide it as well as they could and they never let them be caught.
"How?" Olivia asked.
"We all could see they changes in you. How you were generally more happy and so was Elliot. Instead of pulling all nighters and sleeping in the crib, both of you went home at decent hour and of course the way Elliot usually walked you home… We all are detectives after all," Fin explained.
"But no-one ever said anything," Olivia wondered.
"It was hard shutting Munch up, but otherwise we were waiting for you to come clean. We knew, that you'll tell us, when you're ready. We are truly happy for the both of you," Fin explained.
"Oh, well that's not what I was expecting. We have been trying the way to come clean for months now, but haven't found a right way to tell you guys. So everybody knows?" Olivia said in realization, wondering if Captain really just found out.
"Munch as paranoid he is, started talking about it around the time we had case, where video game made them killers, but then I thought it was just another one of his crazy ideas, but when Casey confronted us in March, around Carrie Eldridge's trial, I put the dots together. Plus I saw you two in close contact few months ago," Fin explained.
"Crap," Olivia swore under her breath.
"Hey, Liv, it's a good thing. We're all glad, that you have found someone, your dating history might be impressive, but unfortunately none of them were mister right. It's good to see you smile," Fin said genuinely.
Olivia looked up, smiling at him weakly and muttering "thank you" silently. Fin put his arm around Olivia, hugging her for a moment.
"Come on, baby girl, I'll take you home," Fin said, releasing her, but keeping his arm on her back, guiding Olivia to their squad car.
"El's probably at the station, so take me there instead," Olivia requested.
Fin nod.
***SVU***
Olivia and Fin arrived back at the precinct, when Munch was taking their victim's statement and some suit was talking with Elliot. Cragen ordered them to write up their DD-5's so they can clear this mess and walk away with their rapist back in prison.
Munch finished with their victim first, noting that this will clear that Elliot let the girl go and didn't traumatize her further, but then everybody went back to their writings, waiting for Elliot to come out, surprised, that questioning him took so long.
Casey waltzed in, when most of the detectives had left already.
"I heard your fishing expedition went well," she announced.
"Ray Schenkel is on his way back to prison, once the hospital releases him," Olivia announced and threw her pen on the table, closing the folder in front of her.
"Wish you would have kept me in the loop, you know I like to be hands on," Casey said, sounding a little disappointed.
"You know us, we only call, when we need a warrant or you to subpoena someone," Fin said.
"Thanks," Casey replied sarcastically.
"You're welcome," Fin said with a huge smile on his face.
"So, where's the hero of the hour?" Casey asked, sitting down behind Elliot's discarded desk.
"Still talking his way out of attempted murder," Munch offered answer this time.
Casey's eyes flew huge and she kept on looking at the detectives one by one, waiting for explanation.
"He got into scuffle with our perp and he came out fine, but the perp was unconscious," Olivia said, eyeing Munch the whole time.
"Well, that explains it," Casey said in understanding.
The officer questioning Stabler walked by their desks and towards the elevator, followed by Elliot himself. He was still wearing the same dirty clothes matching his drawn expression.
"You're at my desk," he said to Casey.
"You weren't using it and I decided to put it to use," Casey replied smartly.
Elliot came over and sat on the edge of Olivia's desk instead.
"You okay?" Olivia asked.
"Yeah, I'm just tired," Elliot answered absentmindedly.
"You wanna go home?" Olivia asked.
"Yeah, I'm going home. I need to be alone today," Elliot said, pushing himself off the desk and heading towards his locker, grabbed his belongings and left without saying a word.
"Munch, you heading home?" Fin asked suddenly.
"Yeah, I'll be right behind you," Munch said.
Both men got up fast, leaving their desk lamps on, as they were suddenly in rush of getting home and ran to the elevator.
"I'll walk you out," Casey said, getting up as fast as she could and followed Munch and Fin.
Olivia was stunned at the events going down and kept on wondering what just happened. She decided to call it a night and collected her things, putting on her coat and grabbing a few folders from the pile – she'll probably end up thinking about work anyway, since Elliot just clearly told her to leave him alone.
Meanwhile Fin, Munch and Casey got to the elevators just as the doors were closing, but managed to get Elliot to hold them.
"You guys in a sudden rush to home?" Elliot asked and raised his eyebrow.
"You could say that," Fin said, letting the doors close behind him.
Casey pressed the emergency stop button. Elliot kept on looking them, sensing that something's about to go down.
"What's up, guys?" Elliot asked warily.
"Look, man, I don't know what you're game is, but let's make some things very clear," Fin started.
"We see so much as Liv coming to work unhappy or clearly upset about something," Munch continued.
"Or hear her saying that you did something wrong by her," Casey went on.
"That includes your regular outburst in the squadroom, usually directed at your partner," Munch added.
"We will come to you and make you wish you were never born," Fin finished.
"You hurt her and we hurt you," Casey said.
"You got that, Stabler?" Munch asked.
Elliot stayed silent for a moment, taking in his friends' confrontation.
"Are we clear?" Fin asked again.
"Yeah, we're good," Elliot said, still taken back.
"Then we're good," Casey decided and pushed the emergency stop button again, allowing the elevator to start moving again.
"Guys, we're really good at this. We should do this more often," Munch said.
"You are gonna give Liv the same speech?" Elliot asked.
"No, Liv's a woman, unlike you, she uses her head," Casey deadpanned.
Elliot started to protest, but his protest died as he was cut off by Munch.
"You already have driven one woman away, we don't want to see the same happening to Olivia," Munch said.
"You keep Kathy out of this," Elliot said, just before the elevator stopped.
Before any other words were exchanged, the doors opened just as Olivia walked past them. She watched curiously as Elliot, Munch, Fin and Casey exited the elevator.
"You had some weird foursome there?" Olivia asked.
"We wanted to have a lil taste of Elliot since you seem to enjoy it so much," Munch announced.
Olivia made a pained face.
"Liv, we're all good," Fin assured her.
"Since when do you take the stairs?" Casey asked, switching topic.
"Since the elevator seemed to be stuck halfway and refused to move. As it comes out I was right," Olivia said smartly.
"It's good for your health and figure," Munch said, holding his thumbs up.
"Back away, John," Elliot said and put his hand around Olivia's shoulders, as a clear sign of possession.
"Come on Munch, I'll drive you home," Fin said, trying to defuse his partner before the explosion.
Munch made an effort to point his fingers to Elliot and then to himself, mouthing "I'm watching you", while Fin almost dragged him away. Casey followed them to the parking lot, leaving Elliot and Olivia alone.
"Well, I'll head home," Olivia said uncomfortably.
"While I love our usual walks to your apartment, but I'm too damn tired tonight, so we'll take truck," Elliot said.
"I thought you wanted to be alone?" Olivia asked.
"But then I opened my eyes and realized that I want to be with you instead," Elliot said with a sly grin.
Olivia laughed at the statement and closed her eyes for a moment.
"Let's go," she said.
They got into his truck and drove to Olivia's Manhattan apartment. It had been a long day, so they settled comfortably in the bed instantly. Olivia had been watching Elliot carefully, because as Fin said – he was not okay.
"You wanna talk about it?" she asked quietly.
"I'm okay," Elliot said, just like before.
"I know. I'm just letting you know, that if you wanna discuss things, then I'm here," Olivia said knowingly.
Elliot nod, but chose to collect his thoughts for a moment.
"I have a problem," Elliot stated.
Olivia chose to stay silent, knowing he'll talk now, but he always does better without interruptions, in that way he can feel like he has the control he needs.
"I'm so angry all the time and I even don't know if I'm angry at perps or someone I know or angry at myself, but I can't let it go. I can't pretend it's not there, because even the shrink I had to talk about my urges for teenagers saw right through it. I don't know how things got so bad," Elliot said.
"Maybe you could talk to Huang," Olivia proposed.
"I don't like shrinks," Elliot snapped.
"I know that, but maybe you can get better, if you talk about it, instead of bottling it up inside of you, because we both know that this is not working," Olivia said, trying to prove her point.
"I know it's not working, Kathy left me because of that," Elliot said loudly.
Olivia winced at the mention of his wife, but hid it from him.
"El, calm down. You seemed to get along with Rebecca Hendrix, maybe you could talk to her again, and I know you've been going to her from time to time. Maybe she can help you work out this anger," Olivia said, hiding the concern and pain from her voice.
"I don't know… Maybe I could try, because I can't let my anger get the best of me," Elliot said, considering her idea.
"I surely hope, because you end up driving people away from you," Olivia said out the truth.
"Liv, are you also tired of me being angry all the time?" Elliot asked seriously.
"I've been tired of it pretty much since we started working together, but it has been getting worse with time, but you already know that. It's funny that I even don't imagine you at ease, because you've been like this for so long time. Don't get me wrong, I'm not happy with your anger, I've just gotten used to it, maybe I'm even too comfortable with it," Olivia confessed.
"So you're not making a problem out of it?" Elliot asked.
"No, absolutely not. Just because I'm comfortable with your anger management, doesn't mean that I like it. I can't say that our relationship is fresh and new, because it's been going on for awhile now, but we are not living together and spend most of the time at work . I'm almost positive that if I have to come home to the Stabler, who beats up perps and yells at people for getting in his way, I don't think I could do that either," Olivia said in all seriousness, as much as she was used with Elliot's behavior, if she had to see the anger every night and deal with Elliot's rage, she'd bail sooner or later.
"Okay. I will look for help. I will do this for you, but you understand nothing will change overnight. It takes time for me to get better and I don't want to watch you walk away, while I'm trying to be a better man. You've been pretty much the only stable thing in my life for so long, if you walk away too… I might not be able to come back," Elliot said, almost pleading.
"I'll be by your side, okay?" Olivia promised, her brown eyes looking for his blue orbs, finally meeting them as Elliot raised his head.
Elliot mouthed "Okay" and rolled over to reach for the lamp, going over Olivia, who was still lying on her back beside him. Elliot's body halfway covered hers as the switch button was finally at reach and he flicked it off. He decided against rolling back to his former position, instead he placed his head on her chest, letting his hand rest on the pillow by her head, smoothly settling in for the night. Olivia's hands automatically moved to rest on his back, taking him in her arms and offering the comfort he needed today.
"Smooth," Olivia commented, earning a smirk from Elliot.
He lifted his head, coming face to face with her, kissing her goodnight in well practiced manner, taking his time savoring the moment and pouring his heart out at the same time. They broke the kiss, letting Elliot settle back, placing his head between her breasts, listening to her steady heartbeat through the material of her shirt, his hand holding onto her shoulder, allowing his fingers to trace indefinite shapes along her collarbone. Olivia mimicked the action with her hand on his back, holding him in her arms.
Their breathing evened out, lulling the strained detectives to sleep, both hoping to find peace in the land of dreams as an attempt to erase the horrible world they see during daytime.