Uh… Hi.

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Lynn did her best to tower over the two sitting on the couch in front of her. With Lisa, it was easy. It wasn't so easy with Luan. Of course neither of them seemed very intimidated, so it was a wasted effort anyway. Lynn gave up intimidation for a lost cause, but she couldn't bring herself to sit down. It would have been more comfortable to do so, but she wouldn't and couldn't give up her dominant position.

"Might I inquire as to what you have called us here for?" Lisa looked up at her. The whiz kids eye lids lowered in boredom. "I have work that must be done."

"You two know what's happening in this house. Tell me." Lynn demanded.

"I'm afraid you will have to be more specific." Lisa deflected.

Lynn caught Luan glancing at Lisa from the corner of her eye, and turned her attention to the comedian.

"Don't think I haven't noticed." She stepped closer to Luan. "Relationships have changed. Lori used to control the family with an iron fist. Now she's almost like Lincoln's pet."

A mixture of smug satisfaction and annoyance flashed across Luan's face, before it smoothed over again. "You think she's being a…" Her face twisted, as she trailed off. "Things aren't as different as you think they are." She said instead, as alarm bells rang through Lynn's mind, because she knew what just happened. Luan was about to make a pun, but she stopped herself. Luan never stopped herself from making a pun, unless things were serious.

Lynn wasn't known to be the most intelligent member of the Loud family, and for good reason. She wasn't stupid, but she preferred doing to thinking, even when doing got her in more trouble. She was, however, an athlete. She was a game player. She played sports, and part of that was strategy. Maybe she liked the physical side of the game better, but she refused to be a loser just because she didn't want to think. How could she win? If this was a game, how did she come out on top? Times like these made her glad she wasn't a meat head jock. It was time to use strategy.

"You can go now Lisa, I believe you." She didn't, but Luan had a weakness that was more easily exploited if she was alone.

Lisa stared at her searchingly, before dropping to the floor and padding towards the stairs to go up.

"We still have things to talk about Luan." She stopped her older sister, when she moved to follow.

"You just said you believed us." Luan complained.

"No I said I believed Lisa. I never said I believed You." She wasn't stupid. She had an eye for these kinds of things.

Luan wasn't directly involved in whatever happened that changed everything, but she was obviously trying to be. She just wasn't doing that well. That had to sting her pride a bit. Lynn just wished she knew what to say to pick at that wound. She had a better chance with Luan, but her chances still weren't great without knowing more about what was going on… It was a real catch twenty-two type situation.

She took a step forward, leaning over and looking down at her comedic sister. "I'm not stupid you know. I see what you're trying to do. You thought nobody would notice that you're trying to become the top dog?" Luan's eyes widened. "It's not working though, is it?" They narrowed dangerously. "No matter how hard you try, you can't beat Lincoln." Luan's lips turn down, frowning. "I don't know what the game is, but I know you're losing it." Lynn leaned closer, getting in her sisters face. "That's where we can help each other." She suggested. "I want to win too, but I can't even play until I know what the rules are. You tell me what's what, and I'll work on weakening Lincoln's position. After that, we're against each other again, but you weren't getting anywhere on your own anyway. It's better for you if you agree."

Lynn stumbled back, as Luan rose to her feet, shoving her away in the process.

"Shut up." Luan growled darkly. "You don't know what you're talking about." She turned and stomped to the steps, calling "We're done." over her shoulder before she disappeared.

Lynn stood in the empty living room, looking where she'd lost sight of her sister.

"Fuck!" She balled her hair in her fists.

It's my birthday soon…

Lincoln couldn't say vampires were his thing exactly. They were supernatural and that was pretty cool, but still, he generally preferred ghosts. Even so, he sat beside Lucy, content to read her new book over her shoulder.

Her hand trailed to the corner of the page, peeling it up and pinching it between two fingers, in a sign that she was done with the page and was simply waiting for him to be done as well.

"Go ahead." He scooted a little closer to her, almost touching.

She turned the page. Childe, the story about a normal persons introduction to the supernatural world after being forcefully turned into a vampire, only for their sire to die before telling them anything. Lucy got it specifically to read it with him, apparently. And it's not like he wasn't enjoying it. It had an excellent mystery going on. A shroud of the unknown that covered everything, and it'd managed to throw off his expectations quite a few times. The world of the book may have had vampires in it, but they weren't exactly the same as classical vampires. Most supernatural things that appeared in the book weren't exactly like their classical versions, and several things were extremely different. Zombies, for instance, were't just mindless flesh hungry corpses. They were an intelligent hive mind, and were all the scarier for it. Ghost were featured in the book too, so that was cool.

He brushed her arm, and she turned another page. They were just sitting in the living room reading, but it was nice. Beyond dates, sex, and other forms of physical affection, it was definitely nice to just spend time with his girls.

"Lincoln." He tensed, but tried not to make it obvious, as Luan called for his attention from the stairs.

He shifted away from Lucy, swiveling his head to look at Luan. "Yeah?"

"I need to talk to you about something. Could you come up to my room?" The expression on her face was unreadable.

"Yeah," Lincoln agreed. He didn't really have a reason not to. Not one he could explain anyway. "Give me a minute to finish the page and I'll meet you up there."

"Alright." She turned and climbed the steps again.

Once she was out of sight, he nudged Lucy. She tilted her head to meet his eyes through her bangs. He didn't, and couldn't, say anything, but he did his vary best to convey his desires to her through silent communication. This was Luan they were thinking about, after all. She had eyes and ears everywhere. One could never be too careful. Then he looked away from her, and actually finished the page as he said he would.

Rising from his seat, he slipped his hand into his pocket. He walked to the steps, and climbed half way. He pulled his phone out and opened the texting app, and held it up as though he was reading a text he just got. He pulled up Lucy from his contact list.

"Follow me. Sneak through the vents and watch the meeting between me and Luan." He typed. Because he needed the extra assurance in case this was something he couldn't deal with alone. "Don't let her notice you, but be ready to do something if I call you." He sent the message, not hearing her receive it, as her phone was always on vibrate. Then he continued up the steps, turning on the landing to move towards Luan and Luna's room.

He rapped his knuckles against the door, half hoping she wouldn't answer, so he could leave.

"Come in" His hopes were dashed, by her voice through the wood.

Opening the gate just enough to slip through, he shut it in his passing, and strolled across the room to stand across from Luan. He faced the vent, hoping to see some sign of Lucy soon.

"So what did you want?" He figured the faster he got this over with the faster he could leave… That was his instinct anyway. He knew intellectually that it would be much better if he drew this out. He could gather more information that way. Luan was up to something, that he knew, and had known for a while. He just hoped she wasn't up to what he feared she was.

"Calm down Lincoln." Luan laughed. "You're so Present tense, it's throwing off my narrative. You need to relax a little and become Past tense. Ha ha, get it?"

Her pun was as awful as ever, but he couldn't bring himself to groan. There was an ominous undertones to her speech.

Lincoln forced himself not to sigh in relief, but did allow his muscles to relax, when he caught movement from the vent. A single finger curled through the grate, behind Luan, before retreating back out of view.

Drawing in a deep breath, he let it out slowly. "Alright, I'm good. What did you need?"

"You're not stupid Lincoln, don't insult me by assuming that I am." Despite her rebuking words, an easy grin remained on her face. "I know what you've been doing with Lori, and you obviously know that I know. You wouldn't react so defensively to my advances otherwise." Warning sirens were blaring in his skull. What was happening? This wasn't like her. "It's useless to keep trying to trick each other, so I'm going to lay out the situation clearly. You're dating Lori, and I want to date you. I know you would never leave her, but I'm willing to share." What was her game?

"That's… a tempting offer, but I don't think Lori would agree." He stalled, knowing it wouldn't stop her. Luan had something prepared, otherwise she wouldn't have done any of this.

"That's true." She paused, looking up at the ceiling, rocking on her heels, and tapping her chin with her index finger as though deep in thought. She was over acting. Lincoln wondered if she was aware of that, or if she just didn't care. "Well, I'm sure her clinginess can feel pretty smothering sometimes. How about I offer myself as a secret get away." The way she was phrasing that… "An escape when she becomes too much." Luan had something up her sleeve. Lincoln was sure of it. He didn't know what it was, but Luan wouldn't be this open about her intentions unless she had some kind of trump card.

"So… I'd be dating you in secret?" He asked. "And you're okay with that?"

"I wouldn't say I'm okay with it, but if it's the only way I can do it, than I'm perfectly willing to make the sacrifice. What do you say? Will you allow me to be your secret girlfriend?"

Lincoln really, Really wanted to say no. Luan had always made him uncomfortable. She still did. He couldn't though. If he did, she'd undoubtably reveal whatever ace she had, and if it was enough to force his cooperation, his situation would become thoroughly unpleasant… More so than it already was. At least now he had some wiggle room. "Alright." He said instead. "Let's give this a shot."

Luan grinned toothily. He'd have to be extremely careful with this…

The Luan in this story is no where near as funny as the Luan from Splitting hairs.

As Lincoln walked silently beside her, Lori couldn't help but wonder what was going on. He'd invited her out on a date, but they hadn't actually gone anywhere. They were just walking, literally, wordlessly down the sidewalk. Or, at least, Lincoln hadn't said anything. There were a few times when she'd tried to start a conversation, and he just nodded his head, and mumbled in response. After a few false starts she stopped trying, and fell into silence too, waiting for him to tell her what was wrong.

"Lori." He said suddenly, "I uh… I have something to tell you." He kicked a stone into the road. "Something happened…" He trailed off, looking nervous.

"What happened?" She prompted him.

"This isn't really a date, I just needed to get out of the house to somewhere private. I don't even really know where we're going."

"Okay." She grasped his hand in hers, and took the lead. They were near the park anyway, so they could go there. The further you got into the tree line, the more secluded it became.

"I guess there's nothing preventing us from turning this into a date, but I'm not sure you'll be in the mood after I tell you." He was rambling a bit.

"Just tell me." She coaxed gently.

"Okay… I was struggling to think of a way to tell you, but maybe it would be best if I just told you the whole story from the beginning." They reached the edge of the park, stepping from the pavement to the grass, Lori led him towards the tree line. "A few days ago, I was reading a book with Lucy, when Luan came into the room and asked to talk with me alone." He paused, glancing around and waiting until they stepped under tree cover, before continuing. "I was suspicious of course, but I agreed. I asked Lucy to follow us stealthily, just in case things turned out badly…" He stopped again, taking a deep breath and letting it out. They were in the same clearing that Lucy showed her before, now, and Lori sat down against a tree, pulling Lincoln down into her lap with her. "Luan asked me to date her in secret, and I agreed."

"What?…" That… That didn't make any sense. Lori knew that Luan wanted to date Lincoln, so that part, at least, wasn't totally unbelievable. Lincoln though. He agreed to cheat on her, and then told her about it only days later? Was he feeling guilty? This didn't make sense. Lincoln was too good for that to be true. There was more to this than that. "Why?"

"Luan's been trying to seduce me for a while. I know you've noticed that, and I definitely have. The thing is though, that she was always more subtle in her attempts." He explained, though he hadn't yet gotten to the part that Lori really wanted to know about. "I think she has something on us. Blackmail of some kind. Otherwise she wouldn't have been so open about her intentions." Okay… That explained some things. "If she didn't have some way of making sure she couldn't lose, she wouldn't have been so confident… I agreed, because I was afraid of what would happen if I didn't." A glowing ember sparked to life in her, gradually building a searing heat that demanded she find Luan and murder her. "I couldn't let this get between us though. I'm telling you, because I love you Lori." And just like that, water doused the flames, replaced with a bubbling heat that was both pleasing, and painful. It made her want to laugh and hug Lincoln, but also snarl and punch Luan.

She settled for a combination of the two, pulling Linc more tightly into her, and growling into his hair. "Leave her to me."

"No, please don't." He pleaded. "I don't want you getting hurt." He twisted in her embrace to face her, "We need to figure out what her trump card is before we do anything. Otherwise, we'll just be falling into whatever trap she set up."

His words made sense, but she didn't like them.

"I can't do nothing." She said.

"I know, I'm not asking you to. I'm just asking you to wait until I figure out how to beat her."

"I don't like it."

"I promise you I won't do anything with her. I won't betray your trust with her."

"I wasn't worried about that." She softly pressed her lips against his. "I love you Lincoln, and I trust you. I just don't like that you have to do this."

"I love you too."

This story has moved away from being erotica somewhat. Maybe I should make the next chapter a sex marathon… I probably won't.

Blake Bradley was sooo totally cute! Leni sipped her beet smoothie, she and Lucy hid in her purse before they entered the theater. She hoped it didn't stain her teeth red… Would Lori like to be kissed when she had red teeth? Leni didn't know.

On screen Blake got splashed with hissy water. They called it holy water in the movie and the tv show, but that was silly. You can't make holes in water, they just fill back up! Ah! He got kicked off a cliff! Bradley noooooooo! Leni stuffed chocolate bats into her mouth, sitting on the edge of her seat. Was he dead? He wasn't dead right? It would be so not totes if he was dead. Why didn't she know about a VOM movie until now?! Normally she had her finger to the sniffing stone, when it came to things like this. Thinking about it though, she'd been spending a lot of her free time with Lincoln, Lori, and more recently Lucy. She wasn't spending as much time on her own hobbies.

Would Lincoln or Lucy be interested in modeling for her?… Yes… At least Lincoln would. She knew he would. He was the best boyfriend ever! He always had time for her. She should ask Lucy when they got out of the movies though… Maybe not a lot of brighter colors though. Lucy wouldn't like it. A dark- Oh! Lucy silently climbed from her seat onto Leni's lap. Hello Lucy.

"I was having a hard time seeing the screen." Lucy mumbled, leaning back against Leni and resting her head against Leni's chest.

Leni didn't mind. She remembered when she was a short person too. It was always so hard to see over other people. She was happy to help her little sister. She curled her arms around Lucy and pulled her younger sister tightly against herself.

Eww, Edman was on screen. The gross, white, creepy, guy. Leni didn't know why he always got more screen time than Blake. He was talking… This was dumb, and Blake was still gone! It was so not totes…

Leni looked away from the screen, dropping her eyes to Lucy instead. It was nice of Lucy to invite her out like this. Almost like when she went out with Lori and Lincoln. Not the same though. It felt different. Leni didn't know why… Lincoln not being here, was that it? Lori? Was this a date? It didn't make her feel all glowy though… No, it did, but not in that way. Not the same way. She had a hard time describing it.

With Lori it was like umbrellas on the beach. Sunscreen, a colorful beach towel, and sand between her toes. She was also like a blanket and pillow fort, keeping out the monsters with a flashlight. A kiss and a hug to make her boo boos go away. A warm summer night.

Lincoln was like a story read to her at bed time. A pat on the head and a ruffle of her hair when she did something good. Checking in her just because. An offered snack in the afternoon. Being found when she's lost and helped back to the house. A back rub when she's sad. A warm summer night.

Lincoln and Lori fit together perfectly. They didn't always, which made Leni sad thinking about it, but they did now… No, they always did, they just weren't… Leni didn't… They were together now though, and it filled her with glow.

Lucy was… A warm summer night…

Leni drew her eyebrows together…

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Chapter notes:

That thing Lynn said about Lori being Lincoln's pet. I hope you guys understand that, that's not at all the nature of their relationship. That's just how Lynn perceives it.

I'm not incredibly happy with that scene from Lori's perspective… It was the best I could do in the moment, but I know it could be done better. It also needed to happen. Lincoln may be pretty manipulative in this story, but he's not unnecessarily dishonest. Keeping the situation with Luan a secret would do nothing but hurt Lori.

"Finger to the sniffing stone" is Leni mashing three idioms together, while totally convinced that she's used one correctly. It's "Finger on the pulse", "Nose to the grindstone", and "Sniff out trouble." As you can see, only one of those is even related to what she means to say.

For a brief explanation. "A warm summer night" is how family feels to Leni. The other things are how Leni feels about that specific person. She doesn't have specifics for Lucy because they haven't really spent time together prior to Lucy's play at seducing her.

I ate a pickle flavored gummy… I'd suggest trying it only for the experience, but it's not that good.

It's past my birthday. Happy unbirthday y'all.