Hey all! Thanks for the reviews to Modern Love!
So, I got an idea to make this a short, three part story still using Bowie songs, just for fun.
This one uses the song 'China Girl' (as if you couldn't tell) and is set a few years before Modern Love.
I know the song for this chapter is 'China Girl', but this story is about a...Chinese boy. Just go with it XD. Lyrics at the bottom in case you're interested. Hope you enjoy it! Any comments would be appreciated if you feel inclined to leave one.
Shout out to LuxahHeart for helping me with a huuuuuge chunk of the dialogue between Kai and Ray.
I don't own the songs. Wish I did. I'd have a much better life.
Warning: This chapter contains drug use and abuse. Also a lemon some readers may not like. Will indicate the start and end for those who want to skip it.
China Girl
The room was dark and had a stale air of tension. Each tick from the clock on the wall like water dripping on the head of a torture victim.
2:34am.
He still wasn't home. Again.
He yanked the zippo out his pocket and flipped the top, sparking the flame and bringing it to the cigarette that had been waiting to be lit for several minutes between his lips.
His eyes squinted hard as the trail of smoke danced in front them.
They had just passed the year mark. He'd made it an entire year with one partner.
And only one partner.
Unheard of for him. God knows he wasn't known for his loyalty. Or for being in a real relationship.
After years of fighting it and self-denial, he'd gotten him to crack. To venture in to unknown waters.
But right now, it looked like holes were staring to form in the boat and it was starting to sink.
He blew out a huge plume of smoke.
Had it been his fault?
Was it him who had created this monster?
The first six months were strange. Because for the first time in his life, he was happy.
They were happy.
All he wanted was to keep him happy.
But after a lifetime of being a lone wolf, he wasn't sure how to do that.
All he could think to do was use what he had an abundance of.
Money and power.
Whatever he wanted, he got. No questions asked.
He didn't seem comfortable with it at first. Having grown up in a humble little village, he wasn't used to being lavished or having whatever he wanted when he asked for it.
He sure got a taste for it soon enough...
The sky was the limit. Anything he wanted to do, anything he wanted to have, anywhere he wanted to go was his on a plate.
The five star trips to wherever tickled his fancy.
Getting in to the most exclusive places, sometimes filled with some of the most famous people in the world.
At Kai's side, he felt like a somebody.
He loved the parties. He always was a social creature. And now he was rubbing elbows and mingling with the most exciting and beautiful people in the world.
As he got more in to the circles, the more invitations they got.
Kai quickly tired of all the gatherings. He was not one for being social...
That and he was getting a little fed up of standing at the bar while he went off enjoying himself with other people...
It wasn't too long before he realised, he didn't need to be at Kai's side to be a somebody.
He growled, pushing himself up from his chair and going to his desk, stubbing out the cigarette.
His eyes were getting heavy, but he needed to wait. He couldn't sleep. He was too anxious and uptight.
Where was he? Who was he with? And what the hell was he doing?
….Why was he such a mess without him? Why was he such a wreck...He was stronger than this, surely.
He pulled out his wallet, getting out a card and a bill. Cutting the small pile of white powder on his desk in to a line.
As he prepared his pick-me-up, his chest clenched.
He'd let him get close, like he'd said he wanted.
He'd opened himself up to him too, like he'd asked.
He'd fallen hard, finally succumbing to everything he'd tried to ignore over the years.
When he was with him, none of the dark parts of him haunted him. He could pretend none of it mattered, because he had him.
And it had turned to this?
He rolled the twenty in his hand in to a tube and leaned over, inhaling deeply as the bottom of the paper met the powder and ran along his release.
He shot back up, holding his nose with his eyes scrunched up and exhaled.
That one stung.
It wasn't long before that was replaced by the buzz he needed. Feeling a rush of high, a burst of energy.
He shot his dilated eyes to the clock as he heard a car pull up.
2:56am.
The rush of energy turned murderous when he heard multiple cackles outside.
He had the audacity to bring the party here? To his house?
He growled and threw open his desk draw in a frenzy, reaching in and tucking it in the back of his pants before storming down to meet his guests...and supposed lover.
Ray fell through the door, giggling and hair disheveled. His select group of friends still laughing behind him, echoing through the large, spacious entrance.
"Shhhh!" he laughed back, pressing a finger to his mouth. They'd need to be quiet until they got to the recreation room in the basement. Didn't want to wake him... He and the three other men did their best to quietly walk through the without a sound.
"Right this way, gentlemen..." he whispered to them in a husky voice as he staggered in to the living room. As he walked in, the light turned on before he could lift his hand to the switch, met with powerful and frazzled crimson eyes. He froze. The blood red eyes moved from him to the others behind him, scanning them. Three tall, good-looking, well built men... His eyes came to look even more possessed.
"Who are your friends?" he asked coldly, sending a shiver down Ray's spine. He forced himself to square his shoulders.
"As you said, friends."he replied bluntly as he folded his arms.
"...Planning on having a little after party, huh?"
Ray cocked a brow. "So what if I was? I live here too, don't I?"
One of the guys glanced between them uncomfortably. Ray's guy had a crazy look in his eyes...he was intimidated.
"...Why don't you join us, huh?" he suggested, wanting to end the tension so they could get the drinks flowing again.
Kai's eyes narrowed at him.
"...You have five seconds to get the fuck out my house..." his voice rumbled out like thunder.
The men tensed.
Ray rolled his eyes.
"Oh, don't listen to him!" he called back to them before stalking up to Kai, his own eyes dilated. "What's the matter, baby? You jealous...?"
Kai's rage blazed. He wasn't going to have him make an asshole of him in front of...whoever the hell these pricks were.
"Five..." he barked as his eyes narrowed at Ray.
"Tsch, knew it...can't stand to see me talk or do anything else with anyone but you..."
He felt white heat surge through him as he tore his eyes off Ray to the other men.
"Four..."
The men tensed, what the hell had they walked in to?
Kai's eyes burned as he reached to the back of his pants and pulled out a gun, cocking it and pointing it at them.
"Three..." his warning voice boomed.
Ray's eyes widened, suddenly feeling stone cold sober.
"Kai what the hell!?"
"You really wanna mess with me!?" his deranged voice roared out at the trespassers in his house, the three of them stumbling back, falling over each other to get out the door.
"Two!" he cried out. The men scrambled to get out.
BANG.
He chuckled maniacally as he saw them yelp and shit their pants, running for their damn lives. He'd just put a hole in the wall.
The smell of gunpowder hitting his nose brought back his rush, adrenaline flowing.
That felt fantastic...
After hearing the door slam shut followed promptly by an engine firing up, he turned to his next problem, slowly bringing his hands away from his ears and managing to glare while looking terrified at the same time.
He smirked.
"Welcome home, sweetheart..." he said in a sweet voice with hint of poison dripping from it.
"Fuck you..." Ray bit back, "What the hell is the matter with you, you fucking psycho!"
Kai cracked his neck. "What's the matter with me? ...Let's see..." he said as he stalked around him. "The man who claims to love me spends more time out doing god knows what, with god knows who...all on my dime. And he expects me to just lie down and take it?"
His golden eyes flared like the sun.
"What? I'm not allowed to have a life?" he spat back defensively. Kai stopped his pacing and grabbed his arm, yanking him forward.
"Oh, you can...but you'd better decide whether it's one that has me in it or not!" he spat in his face angrily, "I will not be used...you hear me?"
Ray's mouth curled in to a fanged smirk as he moved himself closer, getting in his face.
"Well aren't you just adorable when you're jealous?" Ray's voice slithered out.
Kai's arm moved, the irritability in him screaming at him to strike him, but managed to hold it back. "You'd better watch your mouth..." he growled out as he tightened his grip on his arm, "you think you can just walk all over me like this!? Use me as a free ride!?" He started to yell.
Ray put a finger to Kai's mouth, a sloppy grin on his face.
"Shhhhh. C'mon baby, you know it's not like that." He slurred out.
Kai squeezed his arm one more time before pushing him back. "You're not sweet talking your way out of this, Ray! This ends now!" His voice bellowed. "Who the fuck were those guys!? WHERE do you keep disappearing to!?"
Ray's dazed eyes narrowed at him, part of him cautious of the gun still in his hand, the other part not really caring. "I said I went out, am I not allowed to do that or am I some kind of slave that has to be here all the damn time?" He spat back at him.
Kai's eye twitched. His heart slamming erratically as his synapses seemed to be working overtime. "Are you too stupid to see you're playing with fire here? You really think you can fuck around behind my back, leech off me...?"
"Oh shut your mouth you idiot, would I really do that to you? You think I'm a whore?!" Ray snarled, folding his arms over his chest.
Kai felt himself lose control. He was calling him an idiot?! He was making a fool of him!? He stormed up to him, waving the gun in his face in a blind rage. "That's exactly what you are! Exactly what you've become! You think I'm blind!? I've seen you rubbing up against anyone who looked at you!"
Ray's eyes widened at the gun in his face, his heart skipping a beat. He had never seen Kai like this before, it terrified him to no end. He had really lost it tonight, but he wasn't going to take the blame for it. He was a big boy now, he could do whatever he pleased. It was his life, his body. If he wanted to go rub up on some random then he sure as hell was going to.
"Get the fuck out of my face with that you psycho!" He screeched and pushed on Kai's chest away from him, making sure to take an equal step back. "Like you're any fucking saint! Before I came along how many fucking sluts did you bed yourself, huh?! 'Cus I've lost count. It's my fucking body, and if you came out with me more often I wouldn't have to rub up against other people!"
Kai's chest heaved as he took in what was essentially a confession. Images of countless, faceless men doing things to what was his. Who he loved...
"...How many?" his voice rumbled out darkly.
Ray blinked at him a few times, the fuck kind of question was that? "What are you talking about, how many what?"
His deranged eyes lifted to him as he shook with anger. "How many times have you fucked someone behind my back!?"
Ray rolled his eyes, but his back tensed on him. "How dare you! You should know me better than that!"
Kai's eyes faltered slightly, giving off a hint of his heartache. "I thought I did..."
"Oh, you gonna cry?" Ray asked in a patronizing voice, his eyes hard against him. "Be a man for once." He scoffed.
He snapped.
One push too far.
His body trembled furiously as his irises disappeared under his pupils. His arm flew out and fired a shot to the side of Ray with a loud bang, shattering the glass in the cabinet behind him.
As Ray leapt out his skin, he hurtled at him, grabbing the sides of his head and fisting his hair, pressing the freshly shot metal against the right side of his head.
"Oh, my little China doll..." his low, dark voice streamed out, "you should think twice before you speak...and you should be more careful where you hide that box of condoms that keeps getting emptier..."
Ray's eyes widened slightly, "The hell you doing going through my shit?!" He spat and wrangled himself out of Kai's hold, some of his hair getting pulled out.
Kai clenched his fists at his sides, gripping the hair he'd ripped out. "You dare turn this on me...I gave you everything and this is how you repay me!?"
"I have done nothing WRONG!" Ray yelled back, his voice matching Kai's as it echoed through the house.
"Where are those condoms disappearing to then, Ray!? We sure as hell don't use them!" He roared back.
Ray faltered, his mouth opening to speak but nothing came out. How could he keep denying it, keep lying to him to his face?
"Fine, you want to know how many?! I'll be happy to oblige." He started off in a sneer, as he did his best to stand his ground in front of him.
"Your secretary, twice, in your office on your fucking desk. The driver, in the back seat of your car, five times. Those three that came here, all at once. Along with a long list of other nameless assholes that wanted a piece of me." He said, eyes boring into Kai's without a look of guilt upon his face. Every word slipping off his tongue smoothly, his voice like ice with a fire behind it. "Maybe I wouldn't need to get fucked by others if you stepped every now and then." He added, eyeing him hard.
He could only stare as every vicious word pierced him with a knife. He knew it, but to that extent...? What had he done wrong?
"I was right here..." his voice leaked out before he had chance to stop it.
"Tch, no you weren't." He sneered back. "How many times have I asked you go to out with me? How many times have I asked you just to spend some time with me? Huh?! I can't even remember the last time we went out together, let alone had dinner together."
He couldn't take the raw pain in his chest. It was agonising. Not like anything he'd felt before. He tried to push down the rare tears making their way up to his eyes.
"I'm working Ray! ...Keeping you in enough money to go around screwing anything that moves!"
A white flash of rage burst in his eyes as his humiliation hit him in the face.
His secretary?
His driver?
People that were supposed to respect him...
He let out a powerful cry, like a wild animal and tore through the living room, grabbing whatever he could and hurling them across the room, after several loud smashes, he grabbed whatever he could and hurled them in Ray's direction.
Ray dodged, best he could through his high and drunken state, slowly sobering up the more things were thrown at him. A book came hurling at his face and he caught it, throwing it back at him with a powerful angry cry. "You're a real fucking asshole, you know that?!"
Kai sucked in air roughly and spat it out just as roughly through his teeth, growls bursting out with every breath as his body pulsed rapidly with hurt, adrenaline and anger. Enough...Ray had made a fool of him for the last time. He threw himself at him, wrapping his hand around his throat and slamming him against the wall, lifting his shaking hand holding the gun to Ray's temple.
His fiercely dilated eyes drilled in to him. "You...you piece of shit..." he strained out in both rage and burning hurt before letting the rage take over, pushing the metal against his head harder. "You've messed with the wrong man...you hear me? I will...ruin you..." his unhinged voice strew out.
Hot, angry, and frustrated tears rolled down Ray's face, his body shaking harder than it ever had as the cold metal touched his skin. Some how he found it in himself to grab at Kai's wrist, his hand making Kai's shake in turn as he met his eyes again. "You already have."
Kai forced his eyes to glare, with as much force as he could manage. Part of him knew he was right...he'd created this thing in front of him.
"Oh, you have no idea what I'm capable of..." he bit back icily, "And you have no idea what you just gave up...You think I'm powerful now? You wait and see what's in store...you could have had the man that's going to rule the fucking world..."
Ray's lip quivered.
"Pft, you're a fucking dumbass. And you not knowing what I was doing until just recently only proves it." Ray spat back at him.
Kai's mouth curled in to an evil smirk. "You think I didn't know?"
Ray studied him hard, maybe he did know when it started, maybe he didn't but what did it matter now? If he had known all along, then why did he let him keep doing it? "Why then?" His voice came out shaky, holding Kai's murderous gaze.
Kai leaned his face him closer, seeing the glimmer of fear as he tightened his grip.
"To see how far you'd go..." he lied.
The truth was, he couldn't bare to face it.
"You impressed then?" Ray asked with a cocky attitude that had no place in the situation he was in, not having anything else come to mind with that damn gun still pressed to his head.
Kai kept his smirk even though his heart broke a little more.
Impressed? No...
Devastated.
"Oh yeh...had no idea you had it in you..." his chilling voice slithered out, "I hope you'll be just as impressed at what I give back..."
Ray tried not to show that he was scared, but he had to force the lump in his throat and his back was covered in a nervous sweat. "You really going to kill me? The fucking best thing that's ever happened to you?" He asked in a strong voice, having to force himself to sound that way even though his mind was screaming at him to stop, apologize for what he had done and just leave with his tail between his legs. Part of him, the stupid high and drunk part, liked this side of him though. This strong, dominate man he had fallen in love with. Not the weak excuse he had become over the year they had been together who sat behind a desk and wasted himself away. Where was the man who took him out on exciting adventures, the one who showed him how to do a line of coke and get away with pretty much anything because they had the money to do it? He had become stiff, boring, and Ray had moved on but he still wanted him, no matter how badly Kai had changed. He really did love him, but he was also the reason this happened. He should have stopped him, a long time ago, but he wasn't man enough to step up and take back what was his.
Kai arched a smug brow at his nerves. "Kill you? Aw, my little China doll...what do you take me for? Where would the fun be in wasting you?" He jabbed back before letting out another demented chuckle. "And best thing to ever happen to me? You see what I have here?" He asked with a laugh in his voice as he gestured around with his gun. "You were nothing but a pet to me...just turned out you made the mistake of being an disloyal one..."
A cold shiver ran down his back, he didn't like that laugh of his. He never did, not even when they were teenagers. It only brought bad, almost long forgotten, memories. But once again, the other side of him, got excited. He could see it in his eyes, he was high as well, maybe he could work it to his advantage. Get him on his knees and suck him dry, show him who the real 'pet' was. A smirk round up his own face as he met his eyes, "Then you should have had a shorter leash."
Kai felt the air around them get hot. Partly from burning anger, partly from arousal. He was as beautiful as he was treacherous...
He pulled the gun away from his head and used his hand to tilt up his head, smirking his trademark smirk. "Silly me, huh?"
( xxxx Starts Here xxxx)
Ray's eyes pierced into him, not missing the look he had in those beautiful pools of crimson. With his free hand, the other having been latched onto Kai's wrist, he walked his fingers up the side of his arm towards his neck. "Mhmm." He purred out as he nodded best he could with Kai's fingers under his chin. His touch setting his skin on fire like it always did.
Kai smirked harder. He was too easy... What the hell...one last hurrah before he went to work on keeping his word... Not one he'd soon forget either...
He crashed his lips to his, pushing him back against the wall, finally loosening his grip on Ray's throat, but making sure to keep it there. He was the boss after all, he needed to keep him in his place.
Another purr ripped through him, his body trembling as he pressed it into Kai's as he pulled away from the wall slightly. His hand that had traveled towards his neck grabbed at the strands of hair there his fingers dug into them, his nails embedding into Kai's pale skin. His other hand went for his hip, his fingers hooking into the top of his pants and pulled him harder against him where he ground their hips together. His mouth parted, inviting Kai to explore his mouth, with a moan that would put a porn star to shame.
Kai felt anger boil in the pit of his gut as he envisioned him making that noise for however many other men...feeling a hint of disgust at him grinding against him as well a confusing need. Ray's mouth opened, his own wanting to delve in there...his pushed him off. Using the hand holding the gun to wipe his mouth to remind him it was still there.
"Upstairs. Now." He ordered.
Ray looked at him for a second, it was going to be a painful thirteen steps up those stairs, but that gun still in Kai's hands scared him and he did as he was told, peeling himself off the wall and pushing past him without a word. As he started his ascent part of him wanted to get up there and get his shit and get out. The other was congratulating himself for a job well done, he had gotten him to crack.
Kai smirked and followed, feeling powerful. Just what he needed.
When they reached the top of the stairs, he grabbed him from behind, making sure to push the gun in to his back while his free hand reached around and stroked the front of his pants. "Our room. Get undressed and get on the bed. I'll be there in a second..." his husky voice instructed.
He watched Ray walk in to their room before walking faster to his study. His buzz was dying down. If he was going to give him a ride to remember, he'd need a boost. He picked up the card still laying next to the small pile of powder and cut himself another line, giving it a strong snort before coming up again, wiping his nose of the excess. It wasn't long before the sensational rush hit him, as well as a cracked grin. He was ready.
Ray slipped out of his shoes first, kicking them off by the bedroom door before he started to peel off his low cut tank top that had shown off his midriff and tossed them to the side as he walked towards their bed. Leaving a trail of scattered clothes behind him, he left his knee length hair in the high pony tail he had worn it in to go out, climbing on top and in the middle of their bed.
With his nerves having been almost shot and his high crashing down he momentarily forgot why he was up there, wanting to bury himself under the heavy sheets and just go to sleep. The only reminder he had of what he was fixing to do was his cock twitching between his legs and he laid on his stomach, grinding to get some of the pressure off. If Kai walked in on him, who gave a shit, he didn't say he couldn't get ready.
On cue, Kai walked in. His eyes taking in the sight and feeling himself harden in an instant as his maniacal grin grew and stretched across his face.
What a whore he was...
"Hn, excitable, are we?" his husky voice broke the silence in the room.
Ray just rolled his head to look at him and smirked, showing his fangs and he ground down harder into their bed with a wiggle of his ass. "Come and find out." He purred as he pawed at the bed like a cat. Just how he knew he liked him to be.
Kai had never experienced this...being both enraged and feeling a burning hate and turned at the same time. He lifted the gun again. "I give the orders here, kitten..." he spat as he used his free hand to undo his belt.
Ray's eyes widened slightly, why the hell did he still have that? He stopped moving, surprised that he was hard still as Kai stalked over towards the bed. His mouth had gone dry on him and he swallowed hard as he kept his eyes on the gun.
His grin managed to get even larger as he saw the cockiness drain from him. That's right...he was in charge here... He stopped at the edge of the bed and slowly unzipped his pants. "Come put that pretty mouth of yours to work..."
Ray arched a brow at him but did as he was told, crawling to the edge of the bed on his knees to where Kai stood and undid the rest of his pants for him and tugged them down. Getting off the bed, onto his knees again on the floor, well aware how close the back of his head was next to the mattresses; he had just pinned himself between the two. Pushing down the slight panic he reached up, trying to stop his hands from trembling, as he took Kai's length into a firm grip before slowly licking out at the head. Working his hand that held him slowly, painfully slow as he kept focus on his head. Every now and then he'd lick along the length of it, squeeze a little harder, but had denied him a full on blow.
Kai's crazed eyes hazed over as he looked down at him and watched him work. He let a slight, deep moan escape before putting the gun to his head.
"That's not how I like it...or did you lose track of who likes what?" he spat viciously.
Another nervous sweat covered him but he dared to look up at him through his bangs, seeps of gold only coming through the curtain of ebony and he held his gaze as he opened his mouth a little wider and took him into the back of his throat. His hand went to the base, squeezing him harder as he pulled back halfway and then pulled him back in deep. His own moan tearing through him. It didn't matter how many cocks he had sucked off the past few months, Kai's would always be his favorite.
Kai sucked in a hard breath before rolling his head back, thighs tensing and letting out a gruff moan. "That's it, baby...just like that..."
Ray lost his nervousness, the worry gone to the back of his head as he picked up an even pace. Running his tongue along the underside of him, the tip hitting the back of his throat each time he pulled him back in. He shifted on his knees some, getting lower and opening his throat up as wide as he could and pulled him in completely. His hands had gone to the side of Kai's thighs, to ground himself, pausing for just a second to get used to him that far down his throat before he got to work again.
Kai let out ragged breaths as he looked down at him, face flushing in a lust induced fever. His heart clenched harder as he reminded himself this wasn't meant to be a night of intimacy... This was supposed to teach him a lesson. He roughly grabbed the back of Ray's head and fisted a handful of hair before starting to move his hips. He said he'd ruin him and he meant it. His first target was his throat.
Claws came out, latching onto the pale flesh of Kai's thighs as he choked, trying to push him off but his hold on his head was too strong and his reflux was trying hard to kick in on him. He bit down the bile, his stomach twisting in knots as it ran back down his throat mixed with the precum and his thicker saliva. He tried to moan, but it didn't feel good any more, he was hurting him... He had never hurt him before... He would have bit him but that gun was still near his head and he thought better of it. The only thing he could do was take it in stride, eventually he'd tire out, but he knew his throat would be fucked for days.
Kai hissed as the claws scratched his thighs. But weirdly, it just added to his bitter pleasure. He could feel him squirming, not enjoying it like he usually did.
This is what you get for being such a man-whore...
He thrust in to him harder, fucking his skull roughly until he forced himself to stop. Why fill yourself up on bread and deny yourself the joys of the main course?
"Get on that bed...all fours...head down." he barked breathlessly.
Ray glared up at him, panting hard and with each intake his throat stung. It felt like he had just swallowed razor blades and glass, which left his voice useless to protest. He unlatched himself from Kai's legs, leaving drops of blood to roll down, as he pulled himself onto the bed once more and got into the position Kai had demanded.
Kai let out another filthy chuckle as he watched him splay himself for him, reaching and snatching the tube of lubricant from the night stand before hesitating. screwing him dry would hurt more...but then again wouldn't feel good for him either. He flipped the cap and coated himself. But if he thought he'd stretch him out, he had another thing coming, he thought before another burst of hot anger flared in his gut. He'd been stretched out plenty recently anyway... He grabbed Ray's hips and threw himself in without warning, burying himself deep while letting out a vicious grunt.
Hot tears broke the second Kai had thrown himself in, his nails tearing at the sheets below him as he jerked to pull away. His back, legs, arms, everything tensed and his muscles screamed and clamped around him. He had to bite his lip to keep from screaming, drawing his own blood where it spilled down his chin. He tried to breathe, but all he managed to do was choke on a sob.
The part of him that loved him felt remorse as he heard him cry. Part of him wanted to stop. But the bitter, angry, betrayed part now ruled. He threw himself in to him mercilessly, hearing the bed creak and Ray's ragged breathing and whimpers.
"Tell me you're sorry..." he grunted out gruffly.
Ray's lip quivered as he tried to speak but with every jerk and pull, Kai filling him each time, hurting him, he couldn't get the words off his tongue. He wanted to, he wanted to apologize and take back what he had done but even if he did he didn't think Kai would let up. He had seen it in his eyes, he was high again, they both had been high plenty of times doing this. But none of those times ever ended up like this. It clicked quickly. He was being punished. He was being hurt, because he had hurt him. In no way another person should. "I'm sorry." He sobbed out, gripping the sheets harder as tears rolled down his face.
Kai felt his eyes prickle. He thought hearing it would make it better. Take at least some of the pain away, but it didn't... He just gripped his hips harder and rammed in to him harder. "I don't believe you!" his voice screeched.
"Kai!" Ray cried out in a scream, something he had never done before. But then again, this had never happened before. "S-Stop... Stop! STOP!" He screamed out, praying to any higher power that he would, he wasn't that much of a monster. At least he hoped...
An awful shudder went down his spine as he heard Ray beg him to stop. With one more thrust, he slumped over him. He was nowhere near climax...and as much as he wanted to hurt him and hurt him bad, he couldn't. He was a lot of things, but a rapist wasn't one of them.
Breathing erratically, he pulled himself out roughly before standing himself up tall. "What's the matter...huh?"
Quickly, like his life depended on it, he crawled towards the head board pulling his knees to his chest as he glared hard. His pupils were slit, his face tear stained and flushed red. He bared his fangs at him in a warning, hissing as he did so. "The fuck do you think is wrong?!" He screamed at him, his throat burning just as badly as his backside was.
He felt guilt grip him. Remorse. But kept it buried deep. He'd brought this on himself...he'd warned him not to mess with him, and he'd laughed in his face.
"What? Can't take a dick any more? Had your fill?" he snarled angrily.
"You know what you're doing to me... You get a sick kick out of it, do you?!" He screamed again, willing to keep the tears from coming out.
( xxxxx Ends Here xxxxxx)
Kai burned, feeling his temper soar as he grabbed the gun and fired it at the headboard.
"Just like you enjoyed toying with me all this time?! Ripping my heart out?!" he screamed back louder.
Ray let out a yelp as the wood broke into a thousands pieces beside his head, his eyes widened in fear as he just stared at him. He didn't know what prompted him to do it, but he got up on his knees and held his arms out like he was being crucified.
"Do it then!" He screamed, his tears rolling down his face as he held his gaze.
In a drug-induced frenzy he moved the gun to point at Ray's head. Holding it there and feeling his arm tremble. He held it there silently for what felt like hours as his head raced through this entire mess, feeling his heart break all over again as if it was the first time he'd seen it all. He let out a sound like a wounded animal before lunging forward and backhanding the side of his head powerfully instead, needing some kind of violent release.
"You said you loved me!" he roared out.
Ray fell back onto the bed, his head searing with pain as his world started to spin on him. He didn't move for the fear he felt if he did. Maybe somewhere deep down he still did love him, but after all this time, it got lost in the drugs, the alcohol, the fame and fortune. The power. He didn't know what to tell him, instead he turned his head away from him and tried to shield himself with his arms and curled his knees closer to his chest, trembling like a child on their bed, his tears unrelenting.
Kai felt his whole body go heavy and numb, turning himself and flopping himself down to sit on the bed. His hands running up the side of his head. "How could you do this to me!?" he asked in an indistinguishable voice.
"...I'm sorry..." Ray's voice shook out of him, his fingers curling into the sheets by his face. "I'm so sorry..."
He turned his head, red with rage and hurt. "I gave you everything!" he yelled, "Why wasn't it enough!?"
Ray shook his head, slowly for fear if he did any harder the pain would flare. "I don't know..." He choked out, still unable to look at him, his throat still burning but at least the burn in his backside was dying down.
Kai heaved, feeling his chest explode with pain.
"Why wasn't I enough for you?!" he demanded to know.
"I don't know..." He repeated in a quieter voice than before, "You were everything I wanted before... And then you just kept giving me more and more... I don't know what happened Kai... I really don't..." Kai fought the tears as hard as he could...he'd be damned if he cried in front of the greedy, cheating son of a bitch. "I knew you were a mistake..." he hissed out.
Ray curled in on himself tighter, he didn't know what part of this he was crying over now; the hurt he had caused him, the betrayal, what had just transpired or Kai's words. How did he let this go so far, when had he lost who he was? Maybe Kai was actually the mistake, not him. He wasn't cut out for this kind of life, but he had lapped it up hungrily and greedily without a second care in the world. He had never had a reason to care, not when he had Kai at his side. Slowly and carefully he picked himself up into a sitting position, not to anger either his head or Kai and moved towards him on the opposite side of the bed but he refrained from reaching out to him. "I know I can never make it up to you... What I've done to you, but I am sorry... I don't have any excuses for what I did, and I'm sorry you feel that way about me now."
Kai turned his head, worried he was losing the battle to keep his tears at bay. His high was plummeting, only adding to the crippling low feeling his whole body was enduring. "...All I ever wanted was to make you happy..." his voice strained out softly.
"And all I ever wanted was you..." He said, his voice faring no better than Kai's as his tears continued to roll down his face. "I wish I knew what happened along the way that brought us to where we are now."
Kai looked down at the gun in his hand, cocking the chamber and emptying the remaining bullets on the floor before tossing it lazily across the room. His head was swirling. The comedown finally hitting. He needed quiet...
He tried to ignore Ray as he kicked his feet up and lay back on his bed, draping an arm over his aching eyes.
Ray watched him for a second, contemplating what he should do. The pain in his head was starting to fade, Kai hadn't hit him as hard as he knew he could have, and like the damn fool he was he cautiously laid down beside him. Watching him carefully as he did so, and even more as he reached out a little and put his hand on his chest.
Kai's heart bled as he felt him move in to him and draped the arm that was over his eyes around him, gently brushing his fingertips through his hair.
Ray took that as a sign to get closer, draping his leg over Kai's as he rested his head just below his chin. Listening to his heart beat, his head rising and falling with the movements of his chest. His fingers curled over his chest, his body starting to tremble on him again as he bit back the tears. How could he have hurt this wonderful creature who had given him the world and more? What kind of monster had he become, to do such a thing to the man he always wanted? He thought about apologizing again but the words got lost, half afraid that it would break this momentary calm. Everything falling on his shoulders, and the more Kai breathed in deeply his own eye lids started to get heavy on him.
Kai kept his restless eyes closed as he inwardly cringed at him wrapping himself around him like nothing had happened.
He waited. Listening to Ray's breathing getting slower and deeper until he was certain he was asleep.
He glanced at the clock. Almost 4am.
He left it a little longer before slowly and gently untangling himself from the filthy liar beside him, sleeping peacefully with an angelic face as if butter wouldn't melt and felt his stomach churn.
He quietly took himself out the room to the comfort of his study, angrily snatching the cigarettes off his desk and sparking his lighter, inhaling quickly and blowing out a light plume as he plotted his next move.
He fought with himself, conflicted. He loved him...despite all of this, he still did.
There was just one problem...he'd made a threat.
And he was a man of his word...
He picked up his phone and got to work, setting the wheels in motion.
Ray still slept soundly, darkness still covering the world outside when the door threw open.
Two men barged in, grabbing hold of him and yanking him up.
As his eyes shot open, a sack was shoved over his head, just in time for him to scream in panic.
He struggled as the pairs of rough hands dragged him, legs kicking and screaming in disorientated panic across the floor.
Kai heaved himself up from the couch in the living room as he heard the screaming start. In turn setting his own off inside him as the internal battle continued to rage on in full force.
He'd brought this on himself, he reasoned. He knew he wasn't a man you crossed. Knew he had ways and means to destroy those who did.
...And he did it anyway.
He thought he had the upper hand because he loved him. Thought it made him immune.
He was wrong.
He heard the screaming and pathetic pleading mixed in with thuds as the bodies he'd hired to come get him dragged him down the stairs roughly, taking himself to the doorway just as they were halfway down.
"Kai!" Ray's distressed voice called out, "Kai, please! I'm sorry!" he sobbed frantically and desperately.
His heart faltered for a second as he folded his arms in the doorway before running over the long list of betrayals he'd admitted.
His eyes hardened.
He was at the bottom of the stairs now, on his way to the door.
"Kai, please!" he cried out.
"Wait." Kai barked bluntly.
The two goons stopped in their tracks as commanded.
Ray felt a glimmer of hope, hardly noticeable as his heart slammed violently against his chest. Trembling and weeping.
Kai slithered over to him, getting just close enough to smell the fear radiating out his pores.
Something in him felt satisfaction. Killing the remorse he felt.
"Aw...my little China doll..." he said in an icy, faux sympathetic voice, "you shouldn't have messed with me..."
Ray trembled harder as his voice sent paralysing shivers down him.
Kai's eyes burst in to spiteful flames as he leaned in closer.
"I'll ruin everything you are..." he reminded him slowly and bitterly.
The sack in front of him shook.
"Kai..." he choked out.
He tore his eyes to his lackeys, taking a step away and giving them the nod.
Their powerful legs stepped forward, resuming their orders and once again pleading, terrified screaming echoed the house.
Kai stood where he was, waiting for them to leave before he finally let a tear slip down his face. The screaming getting more distant before a car door slammed shut.
Then there was silence.
End.
Oh, oh, oh, little China girl
Oh, oh, oh, little China girl
I could escape this feeling, with my China girl
I feel a wreck without my, little China girl
I hear her heart beating, loud as thunder
Saw their stars crashing
I'm a mess without my, little China girl
Wake up mornings where's my, little China girl
I hear her heart beating, loud as thunder
Saw they stars crashing down
I feel tragic like I'm Marlon Brando
When I look at my China girl
I could pretend that nothing really meant too much
When I look at my China girl
I stumble into town just like a sacred cow
Visions of swastikas in my head
Plans for everyone
It's in the whites of my eyes
My little China girl
You shouldn't mess with me
I'll ruin everything you are
You know, I'll give you television
I'll give you eyes of blue
I'll give you a man who wants to rule the world
And when I get excited
My little China girl says
Oh baby, just you shut your mouth
She says, sh-sh-shhh
She says, sh-sh-shhh
She says
She says
And when I get excited
My little China girl says
Oh baby, just you shut your mouth
And when I get excited
My little China girl says
Oh baby, just you shut your mouth
She says, sh-sh-shhh
She says
Oh, oh, oh, little China girl
Oh, oh, oh, little China girl
Oh, oh, oh, little China girl
Oh, oh, oh, little China girl