Sorry, it took me so long to update, but I wanted to wait for this weeks episode and I think it was good that I did. Basically I did a 50% re-write of what I already had so that it would fit with the last epi and the last Nico-files.
Amazing episode and I can't wait for next week. So excited.
Hope you like the chapter and thank you so much for your reviews!
Chapter 5
No hay màs...
Nico found himself in a deserted parking space, leaning against his car, a guitar in hand while he played the notes of a mariachi song. The last time he had had a quiet moment like this he had been standing in Danis kitchen with a cup of coffee in his hands and had listened to her laughter...
What they had suspected for a while had now become the horrible truth: TK was hooked on painkillers and the small glass with the flush-out showed that he was in deeper than any of them had suspected. They were both staring at the pills again, still in her office and both at a loss what to say. Dani sighed deeply and looked up at Nico, hoping that he would show his usual confidence and assure her with it that he had everything under control. Nothing ever got past Nico, right? And he would help her make this better. After all he had believed her and had searched TKs apartment for her, when even Matt didn't believe in her abilities anymore after the drug test had been negative.
"Thank you, Nico," she said, her eyes still fixed on his face.
"For what are you thanking me?" he looked honestly confused.
"For searching TKs apartment and finding proof that I am right."
"I never thought I'd see the day when you would thank me for one of my 'tricks'," he replied and gave her a small smile.
"Neither did I," she chuckled and bumped his shoulder with hers. "You want some coffee?"
"Coffee sounds good," he nodded and as the smile vanished from his face she realized how exhausted he looked. She bit her tongue to not comment on it, because she knew that if she asked him anything personal, like for how long he was up, he would leave.
"Then come on into the kitchen," she motioned with her head and walked ahead out of her office and away from the horrible proof of TKs troubles. " What do you want? Espresso, Cappuccino, Latte Macchiato?" she asked and the way she talked intended that he could have basically everything with coffee.
"Double Espresso, with sugar," he said and leaned against the kitchen counter across from her.
"Huh, I figured you more for a 'coffee black' kind of guy," she teased him. He grinned at her attempts to bait him and lightly shook his head. He could either not reply and avoid everything remotely personal again or he could reply and give her just a tiny bit more of personal information- which he knew was dangerous in her hands. He was too tired to keep avoiding everything and he always liked her reaction when he gave her personal information, so he decided to humor her.
"No, I like my coffee sweet. Just as I like sweets, they've always been my weakness," he said and was rewarded with the reaction he had been hoping for. Her eyes widened in surprise, then she gasped and gaped at him before a large smile lit up her face.
"Who would have thought," she smiled, " that something so mundane would be your Achilles heel. Sadly I don't have anything here, because the pregnant lady in the house ate it all."
"Actually, I think I can help with that," he said smartly and then left the room. "Just a second," he told her as he left the kitchen and then the house. She heard his car door close before he came back in. Dani was just putting the two cups of java down on the kitchen counter when he entered the kitchen- not that she could see him behind all these blue boxes he had stacked up so high that his upper body and face disappeared behind them.
"Nico, what is this?!" she laughed when she saw him and rushed over to him to help him put the boxes down on the kitchen table.
"Cookies," he said, still hidden behind the packets of cookies.
"Are you the cookie monster or where did you get this insane amount of cookies?" Dani laughed and it struck Nico that in that second she looked carefree and only amused about the situation. For the moment TK and all the other problems were forgotten and Nico consciously decided that he would keep her in this state for as long as possible.
"I may make as much of a mess when I eat cookies, but the last time I checked I wasn't blue and furry," he replied with a teasing smile. Dani started laughing again and opened one of the boxes and took a cookie out.
"They may look and smell like cardboard, but they actually taste pretty good," he shrugged, still smiling. She smiled back over the kitchen counter and took a bite, then nodded approvingly.
"Mmmmhh... not bad," she said and closed the box again before she could be tempted to eat more. Then she handed him the cup. "Here, drink your coffee before it gets cold."
"Thank you." He took the coffee and slowly sipped while she did the same with hers after she had come around the corner and leaned against it while standing next to him.
"You still haven't told me where you got them," she said after a moment of comfortable silence.
"I bought them from a cheeky girl scout who busted me while I was sneaking around TKs apartment," he admitted and had hoped to avoid TKs name for a while longer. The amusement won over the sorrows though and he found Dani chuckling into her coffee cup beside him.
"Big, bad mystery man busted by a girl scout? You didn't make her disappear, did you?" she asked.
"No, she would have beat the crap out of me," he replied and attempted to look scared at the memory and was rewarded with more laughter.
"Did she have blonde ringlets?" the doctor laughed.
"Hey, don't laugh at me. She was scary and sharp like a knife," he mock-defended himself.
"What will we do now with TK?" she changed the topic suddenly, but still with the smile on her face, like she refused to let go of the happiness just yet.
"I will talk to Donnelly and show him that you were right."
"Will you tell him where and how you got the pills?" she asked.
"I won't tell him that you asked me to get the evidence," he answered her unspoken question.
"I don't care if he knows I am behind this, but Matt might let something slip unintentionally. He's not good at keeping secrets," Dani said without judging.
"I know," he nodded.
"Thank you for believing in me, Nico," she told him and it occurred to her that recently she had thanked him an awful lot and should have thanked him even more.
"I never doubt your professional abilities," he replied and tried to make this less personal.
"Another coffee?" she asked and changed the topic, because it hurt just a bit that he couldn't even accept her thanking him when it got too personal. Damn his walls!
"No, I should get going. I still have some things to take care of," he said and put the cup down in the sink.
"Ok, see you tomorrow," Dani said disappointedly.
"Goodbye doctor," Nico nodded once and then was gone. Dani looked over to the packages of cookies and sighed. Why was everything so complicated?
That moment seemed decades ago. He hadn't heard her laugh since then, but he had seen her cry. And it haunted him.
Ever since he had learned about the bugs he had tried to do damage control, find the bugs and find out who had installed them. But once the reporter had talked about tapes recorded in a doctors office and he had understood that Dani had been compromised as well...to say that he was furious and desperate was an understatement. He had always done everything in his power to protect her and to never let her down. He understood how important her job was to her and when she had started dating Donnelly he had pulled away from her, ignoring how much it hurt him. He just wanted to see her happy, it was as simple as that.
He knew it would break her when he had gone to her house to tell her that her office had been bugged and he had been prepared that she blamed him for it, because after all it had been his job to protect her and her patients. What he hadn't expected was how much it would hurt him when she doubted his ability to fix it. That's what he does: fix things. And she had doubted him, had lost her trust in his abilities and in him. Maybe, he wondered, maybe she had never trusted him in the first place.
"Why? How did that happen?" she asked wide eyed and shocked.
"I'm gonna find out whoever did this and recover all the tapes before they go public."
"Don't you get it?! The damage has already been done. My practice, no, my patients, they could all wake up tomorrow and every single secret, intimate thing that they have ever shared in here could be splattered all over the internet."
"That is not gonna happen!"
"How do you know that?"
"Because I'm not gonna let it. Not to the Hawks, not to you."
"This team has compromised me in ways that I never even knew existed. I need you to go please."
She had only seen him as part of the team. Not as her co-worker, friend or even partner in crime. He had been the team for her that night and he had been guilty and not to be trusted. In a way he understood it, but it still hurt.
He had left her office that night, left her, and had gone off to lick his wounds while drinking a Scotch and staring out into the night.
The talk with Vera had helped. She knew that he wasn't joking when he had said "over my dead body". He had always been loyal to Marshal and he had always protected his friend. But he had to decide between his loyalty to Dani and his loyalty to Marshal and Vera made him understand that he had chosen a long time ago. It wasn't even a question or a decision he made consciously. He chose Dani and he would always choose her.
"I'm not used to making mistakes."
"Nico, I think you're being too hard on yourself."
"I don't like letting people down."
"People? You mean Dani. Your friend."
"Yeah"
His friend. If he had ever doubted that Dani was so much more to him than his friend, then he had learned differently that night when he had gone to her with the tapes. He had hoped that bringing her the tapes would ease her mind a bit and also make her trust him again. But Dani was smart and when she had talked about copies he had to tell her the truth.
"Who has the originals?"
"Marshall Pittman"
"But Marshall Pittman is...There is no telling what that man will do with those tapes."
Her tears had hurt him and he had felt guilty. It was his fault that she was breaking down right in front of him and he couldn't do anything. He had wanted to hurry to her, take her in his arms and tell her that everything would be ok. But it would have been a lie and he never lied. Still, seeing this strong woman so shaken and scared was painful. As he had stood there watching her cry on her couch... he couldn't remember ever feeling this helpless and he was frozen to the spot.
"Oh my god, would you please leave I wanna be alone!"
The sheer panic in her voice had shaken him out of his daze and he had known that that "over my dead body" wouldn't be an empty threat. He would find Marshall, he would get these tapes and all copies and he would destroy them at whatever cost. He would make her feel save again and if Marshall would kill him or have him killed afterwards then so be it. But he would make sure that she wouldn't feel helpless and alone again. He had never let her down and he wouldn't start now. She should know that she was his first priority, before the Hawks and certainly before Pittman. She had become all that mattered and he decided that it was the right moment that she knew that.
"No. Dani, I've never let you down and I don't intend to start now. I will get those tapes back. Look at me! Look at me! You're not alone!"
When she had fully turned her head and had moved closer towards him, her eyes suddenly on his lips, he knew that she had understood everything he had said- and everything he hadn't said.
He wanted to lean in, close the space between them and kiss her until she forgot all about tapes and about TK. But there was too much at stake. He looked at her lips and knew that if he would kiss her he couldn't deal with it if she regretted it the next day or a week from then. If he kissed her he wanted to keep kissing her. He pulled away and got up when it finally registered in his brain that he didn't simply have a crush on the cute doctor. He loved her.
Walking away from her while she was sitting crying and broken in her office had been a hard thing to do, but necessary. He had stopped and looked back, tempted to rush back in and be her hero for the moment or the night. He left, knowing that he couldn't face the consequences of her regretting such a night.
He looked down at the guitar in his hands and stopped playing. He should get going. He had a job to do and he needed to be well rested to do it. Once he had done it and once she was happy again, then maybe he could offer her his heart... it was all he had.
No hay màs que solo el corazon que tengo...
TBC