Hachiman groaned when all the pain and fatigue from yesterday's hijinks came back to bite him in the morning, and woke up with numbness all over his body.
And found he was entangled with Hachi. Arms and legs went where they absolutely shouldn't. Let alone erotic, this has to be one of the worst sleep he had in his life.
"What the fuck are you doing in my room, Hachi?" He groaned.
"Ahh. Do me more~" Hachi whispered.
Hachi ended up clinging to him, and he felt something was really off...
Hachi was wide awake of all sudden and felt that too, "...O...Oh, shit... sorry about that."
Hachi immediately ran away out of the room like mad, with a face so red, tomatoes would cry in envy. Hachiman just blinked, feeling uneasy.
It's still seven in the morning, though it counts as a late for them to wake up there's still a lot of time left to go to school. And his mind still not in the right place.
So he went downstairs, looking at panicked Hachi who went to dump everything she wore last night in the washing machine, and locked herself in the shower furiously scrubbing herself clean.
"You're alright?" He asked aloud.
"I'm fine!"
Hachiman decided to shut himself in the toilet. For a while, if he must add. Thankfully, the bathroom and toilet were on the entirely separate establishment in Hikigaya household.
When they're both done and refreshed, they decided to quietly handle cooking for breakfast. Their parents already went ahead to work, and Komachi still hasn't wake up.
Of course, because he was so tired, he bluntly asked despite not wanting to. "...so who are you dreaming of?"
Hachi slammed the knife hard enough for it to embed itself on the cutting board, with tears on the corner of her eyes, she pouted. "...You seriously can't resist, can you?"
"...Well yes, after all, I literally can't imagine who it was." Hachiman rolled his eyes aside, ignoring her obviously fake tears. "I mean I don't even know, are you even into guys?"
"I'm going to tell you as soon as you tell me whose image you toss it out on." Hachi cut him off and pointed the knife, her cheek still red.
"..."
"..."
"...Was it Hayami?" Hachi suddenly tried to guess anyway.
Hachiman blinked, "Hell no, I'm not that much of an otaku, you know?"
"Oh," Hachi said flatly in acknowledgment, "Alright then."
"..."
"By the way, I like boys." Hachi said, "Though for some reason girls tend to pop out in my dream sometimes"
Hachiman couldn't even comment and stopped washing the vegetable with wide, shocked eyes. "Did it bother you that much?"
"Not really, once I fully awake it just kind of, disappear I guess. It was a dream anyway." Hachi said.
"Oh, I see."
So they continued cooking, feeling slightly relieved and less awkward than before after they spill some of their secrets. So they managed to finish a simple breakfast menu for all it's worth when Komachi just woke up close to eight in the morning and yawned.
"Sorry, Komachi was late."
"It's alright, we've been doing too much yesterday." Hachiman said, "Can you go, Komachi?"
"It's alright, though I might doze off in the class."
"Don't worry, I have just the right supplement for you." Hachi gave a cat smile, "You might want to eat a little less though."
"Hey, Hachi, you seem to use a lot of supplement, is that okay?" Hachiman asked, worried, "You're not even an adult yet."
"Don't worry, I'm not using steroids or weird-ass illegal drugs like that," Hachi said, as she finished her low-carb breakfast and drink the protein she prepared. "Back when I'm still under therapy, I also consult a lot of fitness expert and doctors. Supplements are fine as long as you use it in moderation."
Well, it's not like Hachiman consume much of it himself, Hachi actually warned Hachiman the risk of trying to get himself bulked up. Among another risk, a musclebound body can backfire badly when they entered old age.
Hachi also made sure she didn't lose too much fat, keeping her body fat percentage roughly 18%, the fine line between superbly fit and muscular. Of course, part of the reason why is her job as a model.
In the end, after two weeks Hachiman decided to stop taking creatine and simply followed Hachi's diet, adjusted for his gender and weight. He decided to aim for muscle density, not mass, just like she did.
Because his bout of angst in the last two weeks, he only realized this now. But Hachi's schedule and lifestyle were meticulously planned and recorded. Dividing her time between studying, playing and exercising, recording the amount of calorie she got in carbs, fats, and proteins.
She even calculated how much she walked and how much she ate on a date. What kind of normal girl would do that?
Though to be fair, she only did that post-facto, instead of in the middle of a date. But as her housemate and technically twin brother, Hachiman actually found it unsettling.
The sheer amount of effort that Hachi put to make sure she can get as much as she could, like an enduring machine instead of a human being.
He wondered what kind of therapy she undergoes, to learn and maintain such disciplined way of life, and all of this was just because she can have her perfect high school girl debut?
Well, she earned it. But if Hachiman asked himself, he wondered if it was worth it.
He probably wouldn't have the drive, he barely able to keep up as it was.
"Hachiman."
"Hmm."
"Yesterday, Hayami-"
"She was projecting her crush on father to me, and I was a convenient and safe target." Hachiman cut her off firmly, "I think it's pretty obvious that the biggest threat to these idols' chastity is none other than the producer himself. Irony much?"
"Well, not like I would dispute that Hayami seems to be flirting with father all the time." Hachi awkwardly shifted her sitting position, "But I think she was serious about you."
"How could you tell that?" Hachiman raised one eyebrow, "You've met her like, twice?"
"We're both girls, I know it when I see it."
"Pffttt, someone like you actually uses gut feelings? Pull another one." Hachiman dismissed her summarily, "You didn't even notice Hayama's-"
Hachiman stopped before he could complete his sentences.
"What about Hayama-senpai?" Hachi asked innocuously, "You know, recently he began to notice Miura-senpai, but she seems to be giving him the cold shoulder, I wonder why."
It was because of you dumbass. Hachiman screamed internally. Hayato wants to get in your pants, of course, Miura noticed that.
That said, it's not like Hachiman didn't notice the same thing.
Hachiman wonder if Hayato was conflicted about his own feelings because he fell for two girls at the same time?
He ought to ask him, maybe later. Not that he particularly cares.
"Regardless, even if there were feelings between us, a special relationship between us would be completely impossible." Hachiman said, "Hayami was serious about being an idol and I have no intention to change that, and I would hate to be the center of a media circus and lose even more ability to enjoy life."
His father had become such an ace producer that it shocked Hachiman, and while it's still hard to believe, Hachiman prefers him to stay that way instead of being a whiny wage slave.
His feelings were trivial in comparison to that.
...Not that he actually fell for Kanade or anything!
"Cinderella's magic runs out at midnight." Hachiman pointed, "But in this cruel and unjust world, there's no such thing as happy fairy tale ending."
"Smartarse." Hachi scoffed, then handed out Komachi a cup of brown liquid. "Here, a warm chocolate protein with a small blend of other stuff mixed."
Komachi took a drink in her cup and gulped it in one go, seemingly weirded out but not disgusted. "It tastes better than I thought, weird smell tho."
Hachiman and Hachi drank their own blend with a sigh of satisfaction.
"Alright, let's get out of here."
Starting today, they will return to their normal school life as expected. Or at least that was how it should be.
With their twin-looking Cruiser motorcycles, as usual, they made flashy entrance compared to other students. In the first place, Hachi was pretty famous and surrounded by rumors and myth because exaggerated facts and lies both.
But now, her mysterious twin brother joined.
And for the first time in two weeks, they actually came together to school.
"Is it me or we're getting all the stares?" Hachiman asked.
"We don't usually come together yeah." Hachi confirmed, "In the first place, an almost identical-looking set of boy and girl twins are rare."
Hachiman was aching to throw away his glasses just so he could get his peace back!
A strangely loud trumpet-like engine scream filled the air and both Hachi and Hachiman instantly turned their head to the source, finding Yui riding on what basically a miniature formula one unit at high speed and screeched to stop on the parking area.
Hachiman felt like his heart just got punched out of his body from the absurdity.
"Umm, is that F-1 car?" Hachiman asked.
"Hahaha, no, it's a microcar." Hachi said, "50cc, remember?"
"Yahallo, Hikki, Hacchan!" Yui stood out of the car and removed her helmet, smiling happily. "It's rare to see you together."
"Morning, Yuigahama-senpai." Hachi nodded.
"O...osu." Hachiman awkwardly turned away his face, but Hachi kicked him to get his attention back, "What the-"
"Then I'm going ahead, Hachiman, Senpai." Hachi winked at them and left.
"Hey, you know I'm technically your senpai, bitch?" Hachiman asked.
"Eat shit, who cares!" Hachi kept running until she joined what looks like the most slutty group Hachiman ever seen in the history of Soubu.
"What the... are those her friends too?"
"I'm not entirely sure, but Hacchan said they're the class outcasts that belong together... or something." Yui smiled wryly, "I'm very sure they're not as bad as they look."
Hachiman looked at Yui, specifically, her open collar that partially exposed her undershirt and cleavage.
"Yeah, you're right," Hachiman said flatly, and Yui didn't realize that he had been staring, though with no ill intention.
Even after Yukinoshita took over, it seems that Soubu dress code still looser than most other schools in the prefecture. The new regulation seems to mostly enforce skirt length than anything else because any shorter than now and panty shots will be provided for free.
Sometimes Hachiman wondered if this is actually elite school as advertised, though it does boast high rank on National average. Maybe parents won't mind as long as their children have high grades?
Hachi seems to get away wearing a gothic studded belt and non-standard outdoor shoes and to say nothing on Zaimokuza's long coat and gloves.
"Let's go, Hikki." Yui shamelessly called him.
The old Yuigahama would purposely take some distance from him even if she wants to go together because the rest of the school would gossip about them in such cases.
This Yui couldn't give a rat arse about it, maybe because she was different, or maybe because he also changed,, maybe it was a bit of both.
Even if he was the same self-appointed loner, he didn't show himself to be beady-eyed, slouching loser and people won't judge him based on his physical appearance. Because people are superficial like that, they would look the cover first and foremost and that's it.
Hachi was wrong, and he was content with proving her.
"Yeah, sure." He smirked cryptically as he followed Yui to the entrance where the lockers where students store their indoor shoes were located.
He found himself getting a love letter in his own.
This early in the morning he had to deal with this shit.
Honestly, Hachiman tempted to ignore it, but for some reason, his conscience keeps nagging him to take it.
"...what the fuck is this shit?" Hachiman muttered and cursed.
"Ah, umm, I think it's love letter." Yui sheepishly smiled.
"That was a rhetorical question, Yuigahama. I know exactly what it is." Hachiman grumpily put it in his blazer's pocket, he will read it in private later.
Because he knew the pain of having his love letter being read in public, and as rotten as his personality can be, he's not that cruel.
"Ahahaha, you're funny Hikki." Yui said, "Most boys would be overjoyed,
Hachiman could only glare at her, but his eyes were filtered by the glasses and the effect isn't as pronounced. "Like you would love receiving a letter from someone you don't know?"
Yui cheekily rolled her eyes aside and whistled, "I don't know what you're talking about."
How annoying!
"Last week..." Hachiman muttered, "Did the rehearsal went well?"
Yui blinked.
"Ah no, we canceled it because of various reason," Yui said, then clarified it hurriedly. "No-no, it was not because of Hikki. Yumi get a cold, and Tobecchi was told to help his parents, so we canceled it." Yui said.
"I see."
"Well, they planned to do it today. So... umm, if you want, please join." Yui blushed a bit.
"I'll think about it."
However, even Yui realized that, unlike last week, Hachiman actually thinking whether he's going or not instead of just running away politely. That was a huge improvement.
Did something happen over the weekend?
やはり, 俺の関係の値はリセットされました
As Expected, My Relationship Values had been Reset
Disclaimer:
Original Story by Watari Wataru
Chapter 9 - Philia
"Alright, we're going to begin Homeroom right now. Everyone is accounted for?"
Hiratsuka looked at the entire class, she didn't even bother to roll call because she remembered every single of her students.
That and there were no empty seats either, though Yumiko was wearing a mask.
"Miura, are you alright?"
"My throat sore because last week I got a cold, but I'm fine, Sensei," Yumiko replied with a muffled voice.
"Okay then, let's not waste time." Hiratsuka wrote big letters on the blackboard, "Soubu Cultural Festival will be held in three weeks."
"Three weeks preparation? That was even more unusual than usual." Tobe commented.
"Is that some sort of wordplay?" Hayato asked, weirded out.
Or maybe Tobe is just dumb.
"To begin with, Chiba's timing for Culture Festival is just weird. Most of Kanto have it at the end of October or Start of November to follow the National Cultural day, November 3rd." Hachiman snorted, "In Chiba, it's common to have it in Summer or early autumn."
"That's because November is that time. That's right! For you assholes to go to Study Tour! Three days and two nights, sleeping in the same room and losing yourself in the pleasure of youth!" Hiratsuka roared in envy.
"Sensei, ahem, phrasing," Hayato coughed calmly.
Hachiman raised one eyebrow.
"Ahem. Anyway, let's make this straight, what would this class present for the event? Any ideas?" Hiratsuka said.
Ebina stood up furiously, "HAI, ME, MOI, MADEMOISELLE!"
"French?" Yumiko and Yui asked.
"Yo, Ebina, what do you have in mind?" Hiratsuka asked.
Ebina walked to the front of the class, and then slammed a book to the blackboard. "We're going to do a class play!"
"Class Play?"
The students began to whispers among each other. Some seem excited while others are bothered, of course, because it's a demanding event for everyone, who play their role on and off stage. But Plays also usually the easiest to manage once they get the preparation sorted, as opposed to other places like a Ghost house, cafe and so on.
"What the scenario would be?"
"The Little Prince!" Ebina shouted, "Le Petit Prince, first published in 1943, is a novella, the most famous work of French aristocrat, writer, poet, and pioneering aviator Antoine de Saint-Exupéry. After the outbreak of the Second World War, Saint-Exupéry escaped to North America."
"Despite personal upheavals and failing health, he produced almost half of the writings for which he would be remembered, including a tender tale of loneliness, friendship, love, and loss, in the form of a young prince visiting Earth."
"Alien Prince?"
"Sounds interesting!"
"Little Prince huh." Hachiman hummed, "It's not bad at all."
"Care to share your thoughts, transfer student?" Hiratsuka challenged him.
"The Little Prince was written and sold as children's' book. However, it's storytelling and message was considered to be deep and ahead of its time." Hachiman stood up and tried his best to explain. "Inside the story was heartwrenching philosophical question and thoughts about the loss of sense of imagination and joyful life when a child grows up to be an adult."
"The Little Prince had been said to be the most widely sold commercial book in the world, with more than a hundred million copies sold to date. If it were to be made a play, I'm sure it's a scenario that could appeal to everyone." Hachiman finished and sat down.
"Is that true, Hina-chan?" Sagami asked, somewhat distrustful.
"YES! HE'S COMPLETELY ON POINT!" Ebina's blood began to drip from her nose, "It's decided, Hikigaya-kun will be the prince and Hayato-kun will be the pilot!"
"Wait a minute, talking about Prince wouldn't Hayama fit the image the most?" Hachiman protested.
"Alright then, you're the sulky but handsome pilot!" Ebina decided, "Because you're sulky and handsome!"
"I resemble that remark!" Hachiman said in a deadpan tone.
The class laughed at his perfect delivery, Hachiman felt a sense of strangeness, because they're not laughing at him as a person, but his words.
That was completely new experience if he must add. In fact, now he felt super embarrassed too.
"So, that was Ebina's proposal, anyone wants to submit the alternative?" Hiratsuka knocked the board to get everyone's attention.
"Nah, let's go with that."
"Sounds fun!"
"Let's do it."
"Not like we have anything better to do anyway."
There was unanimous agreement about the event that class 2-F that 'The Little Prince' will be used as the scenario for the class play. Honestly, Hachiman doesn't really mind, but if possible he would prefer to stay behind the stage.
Some obviously just go with the flow, and some would definitely complain when the time to work is come, nevertheless, that's just fact of life.
"Well then it's decided, we'll go with Ebina's suggestion." Hiratsuka said, "While we still have the time, let's continue with selection of the committee representatives."
And the enthusiasm that filled the class gone, instantly. The class project is one thing but committee selection is another.
A Culture festival was by no means a small event. And the higher the education level, the more complicated the event and the less teachers would be involved. By the time of high school, Culture festival would be more or less free out of oversight and direct support of the homeroom teachers.
That was why Cultural Festival committee exist, their job was to organize the festival, from preparation to the end. Usually, the committee would be formed from members of student council, two representative from each class -one boy and one girl-, and finally, the volunteers.
"I don't want to work on the committee."
"Yeah, President Yukinoshita was too savage."
"Please, not me."
Hachiman could hear murmur and whispers, apparently, Yukinoshita had a lot of haters. Perhaps even more than before?
"The current president had low approval rating?" He blurted out, pretending not to know anything about it even when he perfectly know.
Perhaps... Yukino's bad habits didn't change all that much?
"No, not really. Her school policies are pretty popular. And she could implement it quickly because all the Teachers trusted her." Miura waved her hand, "But she had a bad personality, so some people can't bear to work with her directly."
"Yukinon isn't that bad." Yui huffed and puffed her cheek, annoyed.
"You just have thick skin, Yui." Yumiko snarked.
"Well, I wonder if I should go." Yui hummed, occasionally stealing Hachiman a glance.
If there's the best time for him to get familiarized with Yukino, then this would be it. Of course, Yui cannot act too overt about it.
"Seriously, any volunteers?"
Total silence filled the class, with an occasional wink and nudge exchanged here and there between the students.
But the conclusion was that there was no one who would want it.
Hachiman raised his hand, "If there's no one who wanted it, I'd like to do that, Sensei."
Hiratsuka was perfectly aware of Hachiman's real goal, however, she decided to tease him about it anyway. "Why would you want that, Hikigaya?"
"We're not getting anywhere. We might be unable to finish it by the end of homeroom, and this means continuing it after the lesson. And in the end, because no one wants to do it, it will be picked at random, and you get unmotivated people. It's pretty annoying for everyone involved." Hachiman said, "As for the class play, someone can do it better than me."
To be honest, it was not like he had no hidden agenda, but at the very least, he didn't lie when he said what he said. A cursory look at his classmates revealed rather colorful reactions, from thankful, relief, confusion, and annoyance.
"Hikigaya-kun..." Ebina pretend to cry as she immediately grabbed his sleeves, "You hate my scenario so much? Haya-Hachi is a must buy! No, MUST GAY!"
"Uh no, I have stage fright so it's impossible for me to play a major character." He said as he retreated away from her, "Also, this is not that kind of story. The French will be offended."
"It's okay, Ebina-san." Saika came to intervene, "I'll take the role of the prince. Since the prince was supposed to be a little kid, my face and voice should fit well."
"Huh? Yeah, really." Ebina blinked, "Alright then, Hayato-kun will play handsome and sulky pilot."
"It's really decided huh." Hayato sulked in response, while Hina patted his shoulder in approval.
Hachiman looked at Saika, who grinned happily.
Well, it seems like Hachiman owed him something, or maybe it was Saika's way to repay Hachiman?
At the very least, Hachiman could say...
"T-thank you, Totsuka."
"It's fine, that's what friends are for!" Saika raised his fists happily. "Besides, Hikigaya-san helped me as well."
Whoa, our relationship already decided before I realized it? Terrifying, simply terrifying! Please come back, moe and insecure Totsuka! This manly Totsuka isn't bad at all, but also really bad!
Yes, Hachiman was super conflicted.
Hachiman put his index finger on his own lips, and Saika replied with same gesture too. They would keep their connections to the idols a secret.
...Is this what they mean by real men's language? No, wait this is fucking bonkers. There's no way understanding can be achieved in such short timeframe.
What the fuck is wrong with this class?
"Alright, Children, settle down. We're going to begin our lesson." Hiratsuka clapped, "We'll decide the girl's representative later."
It was lunch time when the unfinished business from the Homeroom resumed, that is, the selection of the girl member for the Culture festival committee.
"So, before we can begin, let's decide the girl's representative, any volunteers?" The bespectacled class rep announced.
"Yosh!" Yui fired up and raised her hand, "I want to be part of the committee."
"Hmm, Yuigahama-san huh? I think it would be nice." Class Rep smiled, "You're really popular and I believe you're suited for the role."
"Hee, Yui-chan becoming committee member eh?" Sagami teased, "Is it because you want to be close to someone?"
"Yeah." Yui answered frankly, "It's been quite a while since I work together with Yukinon."
From the way Sagami and her lackeys reacted, they definitely didn't expect that one. Hachiman found it rather hilarious. They want to tease Yui and Hachiman, but Yui completely missed the subtext and went straight for pseudo-lesbian text instead.
It seems that Yui is really open about her friendship with Yukino, far more than Hachiman guessed prior.
The bond that this Yuigahama shared with Yukinoshita might have been far stronger than the one that he remember.
Hachiman wondered, is there's a place left for him between these two? Nevertheless, he was determined to find it out with his own eyes. That was the real reason why he decided to join the festival committee in the first place.
"Since summer camp right?" Yumiko nodded, "It's been such a long time."
"Honestly, I would like to join everyone in this class play as well but..."
"You don't have to be in the committee member right?" Hachiman said as he picked up his bag, "You could just stay here to work on it, and then volunteer to help later when you have free time."
"Ah, that..."
"What Hikigaya said makes sense." Hayato agreed, "Actually, I think I'll volunteer too."
"Don't listen to them Yui." Yumiko clenched her fist, "Just do what do you want."
"Ditto!" Ebina raised two peace signs, "Committee work is also important for this class event."
Strange, did Yumiko just openly and completely disagreed with Hayato? Hachiman pondered how much the dynamic between members of Hayato's clique had changed, but because his depression in the last two weeks, Hachiman missed all these sign in plain sight.
"...Alright then." Yui said, perfectly determined. "Class Rep, I'd like to be the girls' representative of class F."
"Ah, I see, then it's decided." Class rep happily approved, "Any objection?"
There was none, at least, no one seems to be explicitly against it anyway. As the result, everyone scrambled out of the class as it was lunchtime.
Hayato, though, look absolutely dejected. Seems like he really wanted Yui to stay.
"In exchange." Yumiko wickedly glared, "You're going to join our band rehearsal as vocal, right?"
"What?!"
"I didn't hear yes? So please say that again." Yumiko almost glued her eyes to Yuigahama's own with the proximity of their face, and the pink haired girl obviously terrified.
Yumiko almost looked like she's one of those classic female delinquents, mask and all.
"Y-yes! I will!" Yui shrieked, "Umm, can Hikki come?"
"Hikio? Of course, he can come." Yumiko said, then she looked at Hachiman. "The usual, Hexa Studio at 6 PM. Then we go to Renaissance afterward after eating outside."
Hachiman sighed, now he can't turn back the offer, "Should I bring Hachi too? You just need Bass right? What about guitar?"
"Yeah sure, just bring her along." Yumiko said as she took a piece of papers, "These are the song we're about to rehearse, I'm not sure if you know them honestly."
Hachiman looked down and noticed the songs, some of them actually Hachi's favorite too. Which means, of course, he also knows and likes them.
"I can do half of them, at least." Hachiman put the paper in his wallet.
"Where are you going Hikki?" Yui asked.
Hachiman wordlessly waved the love letter he got this morning in his locked, and Yui quietly gasp in understanding.
"Good luck Hikki!" Yui happily cheered even though Hachiman couldn't see her.
...
Hachiman went to the promised area, the usual stairs near the bicycle shed. This place used to be his favorite dwelling but looks like it was no longer as peaceful as before. Because girls would badger him, thanks to his glasses face. A group of girls pushed their friend forward, who seem overjoyed that he actually came.
She looked petite, awkward, and vulnerable. Far and away from his type, to boot.
"Umm, Hikigaya-senpai? Please go out with me!"
Despite his intention, Hachiman's mind wasn't filled with the image of the confession, rather, there was only one thing left in his mind now.
Yukinoshita.
And with that firm determination, Hachiman removed his glasses and put it in his breast pocket. The reaction from the girls were rather telling, how much a set of glasses could change the impression of someone. But Hikigaya Hachiman couldn't get arsed about them anymore.
"I'm sorry, I have no intention of going out with anyone at the moment." He firmly rejected her.
His dark grey, lifeless eyes pierced through her gaze and severed any semblance of attraction she had for him.
As Hachiman saw them running in fear and confusion, Hachiman smirked in satisfaction.
That's right.
This is how the real Hikigaya Hachiman should be.