29 Tom's POV
I really didn't know what to do with the idea of going to therapy again. My wife had never liked me going, always thought it made me seem weak and useless, and she pulled me out as soon as she thought I was able to control myself better. She hadn't ever seen the point of me going through more therapy when I was under control of myself again, and I had medication to help me as well. She hadn't liked the medication either, not really. She let me take it, but only because she couldn't handle my mood swings anymore.
So going back again, it was worrying. I didn't know what was going to become of me, or what was going to happen when I got there. But, Natasha was going to help to teach me how to look after Buzz, so I could keep him. I wanted to keep him; I wanted so badly to keep him with me. I was convinced that he would be better off without me at the moment, but maybe if I learned how to be a good dad, I'd get to keep him. Maybe I'd be able to keep him. I would do absolutely anything to keep my son, absolutely anything.
The Friday came along quickly, and soon we were all in the car to go to Natasha's office. Harry knew the way because he had driven Dougie down here lots of times when he was struggling with things. But I knew the way too, so why everyone was in the car, I didn't know. Surely I could have just taken myself and Buzz, while everyone stayed at home? They didn't need to come with me, I did know the way.
"We thought we'd come along for moral support." Danny explained when I told them that they could have stayed home. He looked nervous though, and I couldn't quite understand why.
"Yeah, and you're probably going to be exhausted after a session, so I thought it best if we drove you here and back, so you don't have to worry about driving." Harry explained, that sounded reasonable, I guessed.
"Thank you, but there really is no need, I can drive." It was one thing I could do. I could drive, and drive well. I never sped, or parked in the wrong places, and always followed the sat nav when I needed it, and when there was no traffic, I always got there on time. Driving was something I could actually do.
"I know, but let us do this for you, okay? We want to be helpful, in any way we can, and if that involves us driving you to and from therapy, then so be it." Harry smiled, so I let it go. There was no point in arguing, and I knew what it was like to want to be helpful. I couldn't deny anybody wanting to be helpful; it's all I wanted to do too.
The car drove up to the building I used to go to for therapy, and getting back to the old office was easy enough. It was almost muscle memory, even after all these years.
"Tom, good to see you again, how have you been?" Natasha asked as she opened her office door, immediately shaking my hand.
"Better, taking my medications every day, just as I promised." It was good to start with that, prove I could do something right, that I wasn't utterly crazy or something.
"Good, I'm glad to hear that. I understand you're here because you want some help in looking after Buzz?" Natasha looked between the five of us, lingering on my band mates a few seconds longer than me.
"Yes, I erm... my wife, she left. And I just... I need some help, I'm not... I'm not doing this quite right." I was ashamed to admit to being so useless, but it had to be done. First step to doing better was admitting there was a problem, right?
"I see, come in, all of you come in, so we talk about things further, figure out where things are going well, and where they're not." Natasha ushered us in.
There was no turning back now, was there?