no idea what happened when I first tried to post this chapter, hopefully this works! Thanks to Guest for pointing it out!
60 Dougie's POV
I felt sick, I felt really, really sick. I was going to throw up, at any second, or pass out, one of the two, for certain. But I couldn't, not right now, I had to be upright and ready to look after Tom in any way I could. He was in trouble, and needed emotional support, we had to give it to him, we had to help him in any way we could. He was in shock, we had to help. But how was he? Was he talking? Was he lifeless? What was he feeling? What was he even doing? I hadn't experienced this before, didn't know what to expect. I knew what to expect with some things, but this wasn't one of them!
Walking towards Natasha's office felt like some sort of death march, like we were walking towards some terrible fate, and we weren't even the ones who were ill right now! Did Tom feel like this every time he came here? Would he want to come back again, after this? Or would he be too scared to, in case something bad happened to him again? I was scared to find out, scared to know what was behind that door, scared of it all.
Heading towards the door, my stomach churned more than I thought possible. More than when I'd entered this building for the first time, knowing that I wouldn't be leaving for at least a month. This was worse, this was so, so much worse than that. I didn't know how Tom was going to react to us. Or how he was going to be at all. Was he even allowed to go home now? Or was Natasha going to keep him here? Oh god if she kept him here, how long would he stay?
What if she made him stay for weeks on end? Or decided he couldn't ever come home, thanks to what his wife had done to him? Or what if she took Buzz away from him because she thought he couldn't look after I'm anymore?
"Breathe Doug, breathe." Harry whispered in my ear, as we reached the door.
"Now remember, please try to be gentle, don't make loud sounds, or anything like that. Tom is very fragile, and needs time to adjust." Natasha warned, though gently, before opening the door.
Tom... just, oh God, Tom looked rough.
Tom was curled in a ball on the sofa, hugging his knees to his chest, skin so pale he looked like a corpse. If he hadn't been breathing so raggedly I would have thought he was dead. He was just so still, and looked so gone.
"Tom, your friends are here." Natasha spoke softly, making Tom look up to see us.
"I, I wasn't... she didn't..." Tom whispered, eyes so wide.
"It's okay Tom. We don't have to talk about it right now." Natasha replied in the same tone as before, "You can go over to him, if you want." She whispered to us.
I didn't think I could move, my stomach churning so much I was scared to go. Harry didn't move either, holding me, like he was scared I'd fall over. I wasn't sure if he was right or not.
Danny though, he managed to go over, bending down near Tom, looking up at our friend.
"She didn't. She didn't do anything like that." Tom insisted again.
"Okay Tom, we don't have to talk about it right now if you don't want to." Danny smiled, reaching out to hold Tom's hand.
"But she didn't. I swear she didn't. We, we were happy." Tom carried on.
"Toms been in this loop for a while, he's still in denial, and I'm not sure when he's going to break out of it. Now we can do one of two things now, we can either keep him overnight for observation, or you can take him home, to see if he can break out of it within similar surroundings." Natasha explained, "Neither is worse than the other, and both can work for people. So it's really up to you."
My stomach dropped at the thought, my fears feeling like they were being realised.
"What would happen to Buzz?" I asked, he couldn't be taken away, Tom could not deal with his son being taken away, especially not in this state.
"We have cots for babies, and supplies for situations like this. We wouldn't dream of separating parent and child, so have everything we need to create a safe environment for children too, as well with people who can look after children when the parent can't." Natasha explained, still so soft, so carefully. Like no matter what we said, it would be okay.
"So, so you wouldn't take him away?" Harry held me closer, his arms fully crossing my chest and pulling me so close I could hardly breathe.
"Not for this. We do our best to help, not make things worse." Natasha explained, as Danny distracted Tom, despite looking so scared himself.
"He would only be here for a few days, just to make sure that he's not going to be a harm to himself, or that he's not going to have a severe reaction." This wasn't a severe reaction?
How wasn't this a severe reaction? Tom couldn't stop insisting he wasn't abused, looked near dead too, how was this not a severe reaction? What the hell counted as severe? Did we even want to know?
"I, what do we do?" Harry looked as lost as I felt.
"Personally, I would recommend keeping him in, at least over night, to make sure he's okay. Tom's has had a large shock, and it's difficult to ascertain how he is going to be when he calms down. And that's without considering his bipolar on top of that." I hadn't even thought of that, how was Tom's bipolar going to affect this all? Sometimes the slightest thing could push him into one swing or other, what would this do? This huge news, that completely rewrote his relationship with his wife, the wife he had been with for eleven years.
"I assure you, Tom will come home again if he stays with us over night, we just want to monitor him, and help him anyway we can. This is a big shock, and he needs time to work it all out. He can do that here, if you want him to, or you can take him home too, if you think you can manage him while he's in this state." Natasha reassured, it didn't feel right, neither option felt right!
"Can we think about it?" Harry asked, his hold me near crushing.
"Of course, take as long as you need." Natasha smiled, gesturing for us to go over to Tom, and figure out what we were going to do.