He loves me.
The one emotion that can't easily be explained, and is the seed to other emotions, he just expressed. Every emotion; whether that's anger, sadness or happiness, is evoked by some type of love.
And he loves me.
My heart is racing faster than normal. The pounding against my chest is strong as it tries to beat out of my body. Moving ever so slowly, I begin to feel the blood vessels running through my skin.
How do I tell him I feel the same way? He is leaving in a couple days, I don't want my love to cause him to do something stupid. Like quitting his job and losing all he's worked up to.
Lacing my fingers through his belt loops, I pull him close. His lips crash against mine once more and I slowly push him back as I follow gracefully on top. Our lips never separate as I start to undo the leather that holds up his pants.
Pulling it off I begin to work on undoing his pants; blindly.
I can't remember the last time my hormones were this worked up. I've only been with one other guy than Chandler and he cried afterwards. I never understood why, all he did was repeat that he was sinning and he was going to hell. Let's just say we didn't speak after that night.
Chandler pulled away when he could tell I was getting frustrated trying to get into his pants.
I move back so we are no longer connected, waiting as he slips off his shirt in one quick motion.
"Not quite the article I was going for." I joke. I'm getting wet the more I look at him and I already know this is going to be the quickest round of sex we've ever had.
Shit.
Chandler grins as he leans forward and continues the kiss we left off on. In this moment of relative optimism, I feel his arms tense, and suddenly, in one deft athletic move, he rolls on top of me, and though his weight is mostly through his elbows and forearms planted on either side of my head, I am pinned down and helpless, and a little breathless beneath his bulk.
"Wait, wait, wait." I place my hand on his chest, stopping him "I-I need to pee."
He eyes me skeptically and I immediately regret my choice of excuse. Without daring to question my sudden need to release my bladder, Chandler chuckles and rolls off me; allowing me to get up.
He falls on his back and I lean over to peck him on the lips. "I'll be quick." I assure him before walking to the bathroom with ease knowing Chandler isn't checking out my ass. He's just never been one of those kind of guys.
Closing the door behind me I let out a slow breath "Monica," I begin to whisper, resting my hands on the edge of the sink. "Have you ever had sex before?" I try to calm my heart rate "Because you're acting like the Virgin Mary." Taking another deep breath, I turn on the faucet and wash my hands before fixing my makeup.
The door squeaks as I open it slowly and step out. Chandler sits on the bed in only his boxers and I can't help the cheeky grin that appears.
"How do I look? Sexy." He asks
I laugh out loud as he sits there like a little kid waiting patiently for his turn to open his present from Santa. His legs are crossed pretzel style and his hands rest near his crotch as his back is slouched over.
He's been working out.
"So sexy." I remark, shuffling over to him. "You look cold." I state, as I watch his toes curl in. Sitting on the edge of the bed, I run my hand down his face, mesmerized by his clear eyes. There is no fog, no worry and very little wonder in them. It's like everything is forgotten as we catch up on the years gone by.
"So," He trails off, and I start to wonder when he's going to continue where he left off; nibbling on my neck. "Do you come here often?"
"I try not to. It's bad for my hormones." I play along
His smile is charming as I hold back my laughter. "You know what's bad for my hormones?" He asks, and I shake my head having no idea. "You." He answers, not wasting another beat.
I bite my lower lip as my cheeks begin to blush "Really." I say rather modestly. "Exactly what part of me does it for you?"
He leans forward causing me to lean back and before I realize what's happening, we are back in the position we left off.
"I think you know..." He breathes and the whole point of escaping to the bathroom is lost when his lips connect with mine once more.
His cold hands cause a shiver to run down my spine as his thumbs lace through my panties. I free a much needed moan as my arms wrap around his neck and I pull him close. Straddling his pelvic, I make a point not to touch him; creating a craving I know will drive him crazy.
I start to tell him something but then think twice of it. I want to stay in the moment and fall into each other. Folding toward one another, I leaned back, arching, shored on my back, and I let him pace the occasion. At some point I open my eyes - don't ever remember shutting them - to find him watching me, measuring my progress, and looking a little impatient and eager. Tangling my fingers in his hair, I pull his head down to suck the salt from his tongue.
My hands travel down his spine and I feel his muscles contract. Lifting my hips I allow him to finally rip off my panties. Sliding them down my smooth skin, he abandons them with ease and continues his work up top. I feel a slight disappointment that he had not lingered to stroke my pubic area just yet, but I know he will give every inch of me the attention it needs before the night is over.
He pins my arms over my head and presses his bare chest against mine. He kisses the insides of my arms until he reaches my shoulder, then he spreads his lips and traces his tongue from my shoulder blade to the outside of my breast. His tongue massages my soft sensitive skin, but he purposely avoids my nipple.
I start to pant as my nipple grows erect. He slowly grazes his flat tongue against the pink of my breast and my pelvis contracts in anticipation. He circles his tongue around my nipple and gently sucks. His hand caresses my other breast and my fingernails began to scratch at his bore back before digging into his flesh. Arching my back, I force him closer. I run my hands down his spine and began sliding down his boxers.
With one last suck, he gets up off the bed, takes his pants off, and sits at the foot of the bed; naked. Grabbing my left foot, he kisses the ankle. His lips, ever so slowly, inch their way up my leg until he comes to my pelvis. Only his lips and tongue touch my body, and his gentle kisses are making me ache for more.
He nestles his face in my pubic hair and kisses me. It is so hard for me to lay still, my legs involuntarily jerk at my side because of the sweet sensation building in my groin. With his lips at just the right spot and his tongue battling back and forth my head gets thrown back in ecstasy.
I want him inside of me, I want him to fill me up and I want to feel his chest against mine.
His tongue flicks across me and I immediately follow it with a gasp. "Yes...please..." I instinctively push his head further between my legs.
It wasn't long before I reach climax and Chandler's lips meet mine in a passionate kiss.
With a tremulous breath, I peck him once more before turning us over. "My turn."
Kissing my way down his chest, then his stomach before I let my lips graze his inner thighs. Grabbing the base of his shaft, I press my tongue against him, licking up.
Swirling my tongue around his head then wrapping my lips around his member, I move my head back and forth against the twisting motion of my hand.
"Mon-" He swallows hard and I know he is already getting close. "Mon-please, stop...God..." His mouth falls open and I grin as I press my naked body against his. "I-" I feel his hands reluctantly push me back. It takes a few seconds before he calms down enough to explain "I'm sorry, God I so sorry." He apologizes and I shamefully wrap my arms around myself. "You are amazing, you know that?" He leans up and kisses my lips "I just don't want to embarrass myself. I mean, we just got back together and-"
I stay silent, not sure which way I should respond.
"I just want tonight to be perfect." He admits, kissing me again. "Let me do this for you. I want this to be for you more than me."
Nodding with a smirk, I allow him to take me in as we fall back on the bed.
I support myself on top of him, kissing his lips with longing one final time before slowly lowering myself on to him. We both let out a moan of relief and we join together; thrusting into each other.
Chandler grabs my ass and helps support me as we rock back and forth into each other. As we find our rhythm things start heading up. Sweat forms on our chest and back while we pant mercilessly. "Mmm..."
My hands rest back on his knees as I give him a better view of our sex. "Yes...oh...I'm close..." I tell him just as he shifts positions and presses harder against my G-spot. "I'm so close..." He stretches up off the bed to wrap his arms around my body.
My hands reach for his face and I kiss his smooth cheeks and chin and nose. His lips search for mine and our kiss matches the fast pace of our hips. We break apart for air, and I nestle my face in his shoulder, grinding into him deeper.
"I love you." He moans in my ear as he finds his release.
"I love you, too." I say as I close my eyes and let the sensation take me over. I am filled with so much love and gratitude that I'm immobilized. I lay shaking on top of him, rising and falling with each breath he takes.
Chandler brings up the blanket and wraps it delicately over the both of us before bringing up his arm to support his head as the other tightens around me.
"So what does this mean?" I ask through the dark room. "Where does this put us?"
He doesn't respond for a while, his thoughts a secret to mine. My fingers run through his chest hair, lost in the comfort of his embrace.
"Honestly?"
Matching the pace of his breathing, I shrug.
"I don't know." He begins to stroke my hair as he plants a kiss on my forehead. "I don't know where we'll end up, or if we'll have problems along the way."
I move my head so my chin rest on his shoulder and I look up at him. "I want this to work." I admit.
Sighing, he meets my eyes "Me too. And I know, if it's meant to be, it will work. We'll figure something out."
"Since when did you become so sincere?" Smiling, I rest my head back on his chest.
"What can I say...I've changed." He smirks
"Well, I noticed." I comment, running my hands up and down his abs.
I know we will figure something out. With him in New York and I in LA, we'll find a way to be together. In six months, when my contract is up, I'll see about relocating. I could visit him every other weekend until the day my film wraps. We can video chat and talk all night like we use to when we first started dating. It'll be nice to feel young again and stay up into the night. Lately, I haven't had the energy. My schedule has been in loops and the jet lag doesn't help the situation, either.
"What do you think about me visiting in the near future?" He asks and at first I thought he was joking. "I know our position isn't going to be the easiest, but I was thinking maybe I could fly out Friday after classes, or maybe I'll see about getting a sub. I already have a few vacation-"
"Honey." I stop him with a chuckle. I love it when he babbles on like a nervous teenager. But sometimes, I wish he'd think his sentences through. If he continues with his loose thoughts, pretty soon he'll talk himself out of a commitment. And right now, commitment is all I want.
His eyes search for mine in the dark room. Anticipating my answer.
"I'm not going anywhere." I run my soft hands across his stubble. "We'll work things out. We always have." Pausing, I correct myself "Except for that one time." I mention, uneasy. "But look at us now..." I motion to our sweaty forms "We made up."
Rolling his eyes, he begins to look away but I tighten my grip on him, forcing him to keep eye contact with me.
"Look, Chandler." I start "I'm not going to say it's going to be easy, because it's not." I admit "But if we really want this, and I mean really want this, then nothing will stand in our way." I tell him "I'll come to New York, you can come here, and before the New Year I'll see about putting my place back on the market and moving back home."
"And what about your job?" He asks, sadness written on his features.
"I can work in New York." I say "And if something comes up it'll only be 8 months for a project. Then I'll come back and we can-"
"Can what?" He interrupts "Move back like nothing happened? So basically, I get you to myself for about 4 months out of the year?" My face tenses up from his tone.
"Don't start something." I pull back slightly "I'm trying to make this work, okay? I'm not asking you to leave your job or-or your home for me." My voice begins to tremble "It's going to take some getting use to, I know that and you know that too."
He's silent for what feels like eternity. My words hang in the air like balloons waiting to be popped. The silence is deafening, waiting for it to be broken by noise which shatters it like glass.
"I'm sorry." He whispers, not following it with any other words of emotion that will some how fix the argument we encountered.
I'm not tired, I don't want to go to sleep with such a raging emotion, I want to bring up another subject that will hopefully end this conversation. I want to talk about us, our likes and dislikes, our interests on adulthood; things we haven't communicated sense college.
"What's your class like?" I ask, softly. My head resting on his pecks as my left leg wraps securely over his.
"My class?" He repeats
"Yeah." I smile, cheekily. "I want to know what Mr. Bing is like."
I can feel his whole body ease, while he relaxes with me in his arms. "If you must know." He begins "Mr. Bing is the cool second grade teacher. He has funny hats and a pet bunny named Waffles that all the kids love. His class is very smart and educated." Through the dark, I see the lines of his mouth cress upward into a smile "There's Rebecca, who is shy and quiet, but one of my smartest students in the class. Then there is Eli, who often has trouble staying focused, but if you give him an example that involves sports he'll know the answer. And of course Miles, who has lost all hope for himself. He keeps his head down and always doubts himself but I never lose faith, I believe he can accomplish anything he sets his mind too."
His smile slowly falls and his voice cracks "And of course there is Em. The kindest, selfless child I have ever met through all my years of teaching." A wet tear escapes out of the corner of his eye and I reach up to wipe it away with my thumb. "Emily came up to me the other day to ask if it was okay to give Waffles a carrot." He informs me "I of course said he'd love that. Her heart is so big and full of love." He takes a deep breath and releases it slowly "Her mother, informed me shortly after that Emily...Em has been battling cancer for some tim-" He can't finish his sentence as he breaks down in my arms.
I rub his back consolingly not realizing the own tears that leave a streak down my cheek. He shakes uncontrollably in my arms, his emotions catching up with him and taking over his body. "Shhh..." I rock us back and forth, desperate to give him the comfort he seeks. "Your class..." I reach over to wipe away a lingering tear "Your class sounds wonderful. I'm sure your kids are a few of the best and I'd be honored to meet them someday." I add "Someday soon."
His head remains on my lap and my body continues to lay over his. "How about tomorrow?" He questions
"What?"
His body lifts from mine, the tears subsiding "Fly back with me."
I chuckle, "Chandler..." I don't know how to respond. Of course I want to, but what about my job? I continue shooting Monday morning.
I stare into his puffy eyes, searching for an answer, "You can see your family, see my apartment, the kids-"
"Chandler, I can't just leave. I'm called in less than 48 hours." Shaking my head I pray he doesn't make me choose between him and my work.
"What are they going to do? Find a new lead."
I laugh, uneasy "They can, yes." All hope of me going with him on the next flight out is lost as his face drops "Sweetheart." I lean in to share another passionate kiss. "I'll be back in New York the minute I get some time off." I assure him, connecting my lips with his again "But right now..." I capture his face in my hands "until that day comes..." I run my lips over to his ear and nibble slightly before moving down to his neck "I want to make you..." Looking up, I lock my eyes with him and bring my hand down to his waist, gripping his shaft "Come." I whisper seductively and just like that his member is ready for another round into the night.
The sun isn't fully risen when I wake, and the light trickling through the sheer curtains is gentle enough that I keep my eyes closed. The fact that I'm lying here with Chandler brings a smile to my lips. Our moment, from lusty and hot like last night to this sweetness in our sleep as we lie beside one another, never stops enthralling me.
I stretch out my leg, careful not to shift too hard on the mattress surface, but Chandler stirs behind me. His hand reaching out to brush over my hip.
"Are you awake?" He whispers
"Yes. Barely."
"Mmm." He utters the noise before scooting against me, the width of his chest warm on my back and his legs folding up beneath my thighs. He brushes aside my hair, then presses soft kisses on my neck and shoulder. "Good morning."
"Morning." I loop my arm around my waist, grazing the fingers he'd laid on my hip before he slides them over to the small scar next to my belly button.
He was there when I received this scar. It was around the time I fell against the coffee table and miscarried. The doctors say the fall isn't what caused the miscarriage, it was just a matter of the chromosomes simply not replicating correctly. No matter how many times I hear the scientific reasoning behind the loss of my baby, I still believe I am the logical reason why I am not a mother today.
The tissue is still sensitive, although it has been years since the day. But I no longer feel the pain.
Chandler continues to trace his forefinger and thumb around the mark, but avoids touching it.
"Do you know what I dreamt of?" I ask, breaking the silence that carries between us.
"What?"
"Last night. The way you drew attention to my toes and then my thighs, before you finally reached my breast."
I rub my cheek against the pillow and open my eyes to Chandler nestling closer. I hadn't dreamt of it, but I thought about it now.
Chandler arched up his hips, his nascent erection rubbing against my ass.
"What'd you like most?" I ask
Chandler runs his hand down over my hip, caressing it while he speaks against my neck. "Most? Hard to say." He curves his fingers around my hip bone like I love, teasing me with the dig of his fingertips. "The fact that you're the same Monica I fell in love with years ago. And the way that you find pleasure hasn't changed. The attention I give you, making you rub against me harder..." I inhale sharply, and Chandler shifts his fingers forward, stroking the top of my mound with the faintest touch. "The sound of your moans? That was sexy. The way you took control, too. And when I teased your lips..." After he said this, he ran his fingers lower. I part my legs, the blanket and sheets falling away from us. "Was that the way you wanted the night to end?"
"Yes." I swallow, allowing his fingers to creep between my folds, insistent, exploring. He pushes them inside and I moan.
"You're already wet. Dripping from us just talking about it. I love how talking does this to you, gets you wet like this..."
Rolling backwards into him, I kick my leg out and over his thigh to give him better access. Chandler slides his arm between the mattress and my waist and hoists me until I am almost on top of him. The fingers of his other hand sink in as far as they can. He claps a hand over my breast and holds me to him, his mouth hot on the top of my shoulder.
"Oh, God..."
Chandler draws his fingers out, then swipes the pads fast over my lips like I love. I gasp when he replaces his fingers with his mouth and begins to lick my swollen opening. "Jesus..." My heart is racing with acceleration. Pleasure dances its way through my senses, unfurling in my heart. I can't help tugging at his head, pushing the two of us closer and closer. His lips make a popping sound as he sucks my flesh.
I can't get enough of him. I'm tired and sore but I don't care. I don't want to sleep. I want to ache. I want him in me, all the time. With his weight on top of mine, I want to squeeze him in further and further. I want to watch his face as he sweats. I want all of him.
"Chan...please..." My eyes roll back as I climax, and just as I do he licks long and hard until it's over. Before I have time to catch my breath, he climbs over me and settles himself right at my opening. We make eye contact and I brush my hand around his neck, forcing his lips against mine once more.
The storm has ended, the only sound outside is the sound of traffic; as emergency vehicles tend to the cities aid. In just a couple hours I'll be alone once more as Chandler returns back to New York. He'll be back in his classroom, inspiring young noble humans; molding their clean minds into something unimaginable. I'll be in my directors chair watching as the camera pans with the performance; faking every move until the moment the Director yells cut.
AN: You're Welcome.
I was about ready to post this, I just needed to make one more click, but then I stopped. I didn't like the length. I figured I at least owed you guys a decent chapter. So I added 2,000+ more words and now it's all yours to review. Positive feedback, negative feedback, steamy feedback...I don't care, but it's getting harder to find the motivation to post.