South Park: The Legend of Sir Justice and the South Park Saints

by WildCard0531

Samuel Cooper is a young lad from Houston, TX. He also has a superhero alter ego known as Sir Justice. Watch as Sam goes through life fighting for his friends, the town, and later, the world. The reason I made this fanfic was because I was in the mood to make an anime esque adventure fanfic with South Park characters. Favorite if you wish. Enjoy! First entry in SPS Universe

8. Death TV (Part 1)

The Legend of Sir Justice and the South Park Saints: Episode 7: Death T.V (Part 1)

(It's a bright sunny day in South Park. The first Monday after Spring Break. A private jet has landed in South Park Airfield. This jet is black with a pink stripe doing across it and the wings have pictures of smiley faces on them. On the jet, the same character from last episode, Smiles, is just sitting there, ready for action. It's then that the pilot makes an announcement)

(Smiles is a man wearing a long black trench coat, a black fedora hat, metal boots, and a smiley face mask that covers his entire head)

Pilot: Master Smiles, sir! We've landed in South Park! It's showtime!

Smiles: Excellent. Let the games begin!

(Intro song: Resonance by T.M Revolution)

(The intro starts with the town of South Park, and a teenaged Damien looks down on the town from atop a hill)

(Tsunaida tamashii no hi ga mune wo sasu nara? Kotoba yori motto tsuyoi hibiki ga ima kikoeru ka?)

(Enemy soldiers dressed in black are attacking the town and spreading chaos and destruction)

(Roku ni me mo awasazu unmei ni made karandeku Yukisaki moro kabutteru kuenai yoru wo hashire)

(The main characters that include teenaged Samuel/Sir Justice, Kurt/Smith the Kid, Bridgette/the Singing Angel, Ursula/Samurai of Light, Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress, Bebe/Sharp Edge Stevens, Kenny/Mysterion, Cartman/Coon, Butters/Professor Chaos, Stan/Tool Shed, Kyle/Human Kite, Craig/DJ C-Rage, Tweek/Peppy Prince, Token/Tupper Wear, Clyde/Mosquito, Red/Madame Knight, Heidi/Fatal Feline, Annie/Darling Dame, Leon/Beo-Wolf, Mr. Slave/Glamorous Gardener, Jeffrey/Sgt. Stevens, Doug/Cerulean Viper, Cody/Mr. Gentleman, Dr. Sophocles, and Mephesto and his genetic experiments charge into the town ready for the fight of their lives. They all fight off the soldiers)

(Fukaoi shisugita mabushisa ga warui yume ni tsuzuite mo)

(Damien appears along with his 13 commanders (5 of which are Trent, Justin, Ethel, Max, and Tobias Shredder). Our heroes look at each other, smirk, pull out their weapons and fight)

(Tsunaida tamashii no hi ga mune wo sasu nara Kotoba yori motto tsuyoi hibiki ga ima kikoeru ka? Deatta wake wa dou datte ii mikitsukerarete Fureta shunkan no kizu no fun dake tashika ni nareru)

(Damien steps forward ready to face our heroes, and they prepare to clash as the title of the fanfic, "The Legend of Sir Justice and the South Park Saints" appears)

(We cut to the students of South Park High School running to their next class, trying to get back into the swing of things after Spring Break. They just had to tell themselves, "Only two more months and then we are free for the summer!" The principal of the school, who also happens to be Jeffrey Stevens, Bebe's father, makes an announcement on the intercom)

(Note: Cody does not attend South Park High. If you recall, he attends prestigious private schools due to his rich lifestyle. So if you're wondering why you won't see him in most chapters involving South Park High, that's why)

Jeffrey: (Over the intercom) Hello, students! Welcome back! We hope you had a pleasant and restful Spring Break! Today for lunch in the cafeteria we'll be having macaroni and cheese with some peas on the side. Seniors, please hand in your permission slips for senior trip and prom by the end of this month. That is all, have a wonderful day! Glad to have you all back!

(We cut to the math teacher's class. The math teacher just so happens to be Mr. Alexander Slave! After he broke up with Mr. Garrison a while back, he got a job in the high school to teach mathematics. Anyway, in the math classroom, the following people are seen: Sam and the rest of the teenage members of the South Park Saints (sans for Cody), Esther, Jason, Lola, David, Jenny, Bradley, and one unknown boy: A new character named Apollo)

(Esther let her hair grow, and she is wearing a plain blue t-shirt with a ruffled pink skirt, black thigh high socks, and pink shoes)

(Jason, much like Token, decided to make a man-bun with his hair, has black glasses covering his eyes, purple fingerless gloves, a purple button up dress shirt, blue pants, and black shoes)

(Lola's appearance hasn't changed much since she was 10, except for the fact that she has added a black shawl to her wardrobe)

(David's hairstyle hasn't changed since he was a kid, and he is wearing a white tank top with the number 68 written in blue lettering, white basketball shorts, and white shoes)

(Jenny's hairstyle hasn't changed since she was a kid. She's wearing a sky blue sundress with white shoes and white ankle socks)

(Bradley let his hair grow, and he is wearing a dark blue sweater with black jeans and black shoes)

(This new Apollo character is a bit scrawny, and he has yellow eyes and black hair, and he is wearing a black fedora hat, a black trench coat with a white dress shirt underneath that's tucked into some black dress pants, a black belt with a silver buckle, and black loafers)

(As everyone is goofing off before class begins, Apollo is reading from a book. There are pictures of armor and weapons. Pay attention to what he's reading, it'll become important later)

Apollo: (Reading to himself) Long ago, there lived a great warrior named Luther Von Cooper III. In battle, this man was a force to be reckoned with. It was almost guaranteed that if he entered a fight, he'd come out on top. And he had his weapons and armor to thank for that.

(In the book, we see pictures of the weapon and armor)

Apollo: (Reading to himself) These include the Wings of Pegasus, Master's Blade, Two Passionate Pistols, Two Godly Gauntlets, Diamond Shield, Comet Boots, Helmet of Honor, and Titanium Breast Plate. When all of these weapons and armor pieces are together, the holder gains a powerful of a god like sort. When Luther had them on, he was almost unstoppable.

(The next page has Luther Von Cooper III fighting against a man with long black hair and wearing a black tuxedo. Luther is leading his army against this other man's army: A group of hooded figures wearing bat masks)

Apollo: (Reading to himself) On one fateful day, Cooper fought against the evil wizard, Carlos Murciélago. He led is troops into battle against Murciélago and his army. While the two armies were warring, Cooper and Carlos had their own battle. The two fighters fought valiantly until…

(The next page shows Carlos hitting Cooper with a powerful magic attack, fatally wounding him)

Apollo: (Reading to himself)…Carlos fired a powerful attack that nailed Cooper right in the heart. The brave warrior had enough strength in him to persevere, and he hit him hard with a powerful slash from his sword! Instead of dying, Carlos just flew off somewhere and sealed himself away, awaiting the day he can resume his conquest of evil.

(The next page shows Luther Von Cooper III opening some kind of time portal)

Apollo: (Reading to himself) Before Cooper died, he opened up a time portal using whatever magic he had, and he threw all of his weapons and armor into the portal, sending them all to different periods in time. He did this so that nobody could ever steal the weapons and armor from his dead corpse and abuse their power. As stated previously, only when all of the weapon and armor pieces are together can their true power be awakened. And thus, Luther Von Cooper III drew his final breath and passed on.

(He closes the book)

David: (To himself) Finally, that nerdy kid got his nose out of that book

Apollo: (Takes a quick glance of hatred at David and thinks to himself) These weapon and armor pieces. I'm going to find them one day and teach all of these pricks a lesson.

(We get flashbacks to when Apollo attended South Park Elementary School, Middle School and his current years at South Park High School. Flashback #1: Some random kids pants him in front of everyone, causing any bystanders to point and laugh)

Apollo (v.o): Ever since the day I enrolled in this shitty school district…

(Flashback #2: Someone broke into his gym locker and made off with his clothes)

Apollo (v.o): These punks made my life a living hell! And why?

(Flashback #3: Some random kids are beating Apollo up and taking his lunch money)

Apollo (v.o): Just because I'm different and I focus way too much on weapons and armor. And I don't socialize with anyone else!

(Flashback #4: Random kids are throwing paper balls and spit wads at him)

Apollo (v.o): I call bullshit! I don't deserve poor treatment because of that!

(Back to present time)

Apollo: (Thinking to himself) They all deserve to pay, guilty or innocent! They'd better pray that I don't find these weapons and armor pieces! (He looks outside the window to see the school's flagpole. Since there's no wind outside, the flag is limp. But Apollo widens his eyes and the flag starts to wave and he thinks to himself…) I'm already a beast with this telekinesis that was given to me upon my creation! I can just imagine the amount of power I'll posses when I have Luther von Cooper III's weapons and armor!

(Suddenly, Mr. Slave enters the classroom ready to teach and everyone stops goofing around)

Alex Slave: Morning, class! Butts in your seats, phones away, books and pencils out!

(Everyone prepares for the daily math lesson)

Alex Slave: (Looks at Apollo) Excuse me, Apollo?

Apollo: Sir?

Alex Slave: I have a note that says you're excused from this class for the rest of the week. Your sister sent it. So, I guess you're free to go.

Butters: Aw, lucky! I wish I was excused from this class

Wendy: Calm down, Butters.

Sam: How odd. (Turns to Kurt) Can your sister actually sign a note to get you out of class? I thought only a parent could do that?

Kurt: Who knows?

Jason: (Annoyed by Apollo) Mr. Slave, shouldn't people like Apollo be homeschooled?

Alex Slave: People like what, Jason?

Jason: Oh, you know, creep bookworms like him!

(The class sans for Mr. Slave, the saints, and Apollo laugh)

Alex Slave: Leave Apollo alone, Jesus Christ!

(Jenny then decides to not only mock Apollo, but also try and get out of class too)

Jenny: (Raises her hand) Excuse me, Mr. Slave. I'm a creepy bookworm, can I be excused?

(The class sans for Mr. Slave, the saints, and Apollo laugh again)

Apollo: (Gets angry and thinks to himself…) Laugh it up you little brat! (He widens his eyes, allowing his telekinesis to kick in. Suddenly, Jenny feels a pain in her stomach)

Jenny: (Holding her stomach) Oh, something doesn't feel right! Stomach…hurts!

(And then…Jenny craps herself)

Cartman: Oh my God! Jenny Simons crapped herself!

Wendy: (Hits Cartman in the stomach with her elbow, causing him to wince) Behave yourself!

Jenny: What!? I don't know how it happened!

Esther: Sick!

Bebe: Gross!

(Jenny starts to bawl her eyes out as Apollo leaves, smirking (Author's Note: Bass to Mouth reference FTW!))

(In the hallway, Apollo is just walking)

Apollo: (Thinks to himself) Little bitch had it coming!

Female voice: Hello, Apollo, my twin brother!

Apollo: (Turns around and faces his sister) Ah, Maria!

(Maria has pink dyed hair tied in a ponytail, red eyes, a white sweatshirt, light blue jeans, and white shoes)

Maria: So, aren't you going to thank me for busting you out of math class?

Apollo: I'm glad you got me far away from that classroom of idiots, but I'm curious as to why?

Maria: Oh, brother, it's our senior year of high school! I think we should have some fun! What do you say we hit the mall for a quickie shopping spree and head back here. We may be late for gym, but I think you need something like this! You've been so stressed out lately and you need to loosen up!

Apollo: Maria, you fool! You're my sister and I love you, but have you forgotten why we're here? Why father created us in the first place?

Maria: I haven't forgotten, there are just things that I'd rather be doing. You know, hang out with friends, go to parties, live it up!

Apollo: We don't exist to party like a bunch of rowdy teenagers! Before he sealed himself away, our father created us 1,000 years ago so that we may continue his legacy of darkness and wreck havoc! We've both lived over 50 lives, implanting our spirits and memories into our descendants. Over the past 1,000 years, I can safely say that I've been holding up my end of the mischief making by toying with these fools using my telekinesis and magic whenever necessary. Meanwhile, you haven't done jack shit!

Maria: That's because I don't see the point in causing mischief and hurting innocent people. I just want to have fun and make friends like a normal person!

Apollo: These people aren't innocent! Trust me!

Maria: Maybe you think this way because you don't socialize or try and be friends with anyone. You're too preoccupied with living up to father's expectations or looking into your books. And also, if father were around, I think he'd be a little disappointed that you're not killing anyone.

Apollo: I'm not trying to kill anyone. If I do, it's by complete accident. I just want to cause discord and distress. You know, burn down a house and make the inhabitants homeless, cause a car crash and have the driver break their bones. However, I had to tame down my mischief since security is getting tighter with each lifetime we live. Not only that, but these South Park Saints that I keep hearing about are running around like they own the place, and arresting people like me. It doesn't exactly help that the saints just so happen to be some of our classmates and teachers. So I need to keep my mischief making on the down low, or at the very least tame it down. For example, I made a girl shit herself just now for making fun of me.

Maria: You used your telekinesis for that?! People are going to suspect something is wrong! Why don't you be like me and try and hold your powers in and be accepted?

Apollo: Nobody has accused me yet! And I don't know if you haven't notice, but I'm not you! So just leave me alone, Maria! Let me do my own thing, and I'll be just fine! I still can't believe that you and I share the same last name of Murciélago!

(He storms off)

Maria: Apollo…brother….

(Later that day, it's time for the senior gym class. All of the seniors are outside playing a game of baseball. The referee of the game is the gym teacher, who also happens to be Wendy's father, Doug Testaburger. The students are dressed in the school's gym clothes: a white shirt with the school's logo on the left shoulder and either green shorts or green sweat pants. They have red and blue badges that Doug gave to them so they know who is on what team. Currently, the blue team is losing)

Doug: (Looks at his watch and sees that class is almost over) Okay, everyone, last round! (Turns to Apollo) Okay, Apollo, you're turn.

Apollo: (On blue team) Uh, I'd rather not.

Doug: You're the only one who hasn't gone yet. Unless you want a failing grade for the day?

Apollo: I thought all you had to do to pass gym was just show up.

Doug: Just come up here.

Apollo: Very well. (He takes a bat from Doug and steps up to the plate. The pitcher for the red team, Sam, is ready)

Sam: (On red team) Good luck, Apollo!

Apollo: Just shut up!

Sam: (Confused) But I really do mean him good luck. Oh well. Here comes the pitch! (He throws the ball, but Apollo misses)

Doug: Strike one! Blue team gets two more chances!

Bradley: (On the red team) Heh, we've got this in the bag. (Shouts to the blue team) You guys will never win with someone like Apollo on your team! You'll always end up losing to us!

Ursula: (On the blue team) Hey, Bradley! (Sticks up her middle finger) Right here!

Red: (On the blue team) Ha, ha, ha! Nice.

Doug: Ursula, Red, let's be courteous.

Sam: (Pitches the ball again, but Apollo misses again)

Doug: Strike two! One last chance! Third time is the charm, Apollo, you can do it!

Esther: (On the red team) Forget about it, Mr. Testaburger. He's hopeless. (Turns to Sam) Sam, pitch that ball and get this loser out of here. Let's wrap this up!

Sam: Esther, be nice.

(Back on the blue team, some of Apollo's other team mates are having doubts)

Sally: (Turns to Maria) Is your brother slow?

Maria: No, he just doesn't get out much.

(On the red team, Bradley is chanting something)

Bradley: Jinx, jinx, jinx, jinx! Don't hit the ball!

Sam: Brad! (Turns back to Apollo) Get ready! (He tosses the ball, and Apollo misses again)

Doug: Strike three! Blue team loses, red team wins!

Bebe: (On the blue team) Aw, damn it!

Doug: Good game everybody. I'll see you all tomorrow. Make sure you put your badges away in this bucket.

(Everyone gets ready to leave as they put the sports equipment and badges away. Most of the members from the red team taunt Apollo)

Bradley: (Blows a raspberry at him) Ha, ha, loser!

(Doesn't help that some of the blue team begin hating on Apollo)

Jason: Hey, next time actually hit the ball, idiot! (Whacks him upside the head and Apollo rubs it)

Sally: (Glares at him) You suck!

(Everyone heads back for the school, but Apollo get angry again)

Apollo: (Uses his telekinesis to lift up one of the baseball bats) We'll see who sucks!

(Using his powers, he flings the bat, and it lands right in front of Jason, who is walking behind Sally. Jason trips over the bat, and falls forward. Upon falling, he grabs Sally for leverage, but accidently grabs her shorts and pulls them down, revealing a pair of lacy pink panties. Sally shrieks causing everyone to turn around in their direction)

Kenny: (Blushing at what he sees) Awesome!

Sally: (Quickly pulls her shorts back up and blushes out of embarrassment) What the hell Jason!

Jason: No, Sally! I swear it was an accident! I didn't mean it!

Bradley: (He's standing behind Esther as he's watching this) Heh, looks like Jason's in the doghouse now!

(Suddenly, Bradley feels a loss of control in his hands. Apollo is using his telekinesis to control Bradley's hands)

Bradley: Hey! W-What's happening!?

(Using his powers to control Bradley's hands, Apollo guides Bradley's hands towards Esther, and he ends up reaching around her and groping her boobs)

Esther: (Gasps and she turns around to glare at Bradley)

Bradley: I-It's not what it looks like, I swear!

(Esther punches Bradley hard in the face and knocks him unconscious)

Esther: Wait until I tell Principal Stevens about what you did, you pervert! (She runs into the school)

Stan: Whoa, Bradley actually groped Esther.

Kenny: Lucky.

Cartman: (Yawns) Well, that was quite the display of violence and perversion. So, who is up for macaroni and cheese?

(Everyone heads inside. Maria is just standing there in amazement when Apollo passes her. Apollo smirks at his sister as if saying, "Yeah, that was all me," and walks inside the school. Maria has a look of worry on her face as she catches up to him)

Maria: Apollo, did you seriously do all of that?

Apollo: Yes I did.

Maria: I told you that you shouldn't use your powers for vengeance! People are going to suspect that something is up!

Apollo: These assholes deserve everything they have coming to them! You don't know the amount of shit that I've been through.

Maria: That's because I try and befriend these people instead of make mischief and continue my father's silly legacy! Maybe you should try being nice sometime.

Apollo: Maybe you should try using your powers for evil at least once, sister! This discussion is over! Goodbye! (He runs away from her as Maria stares after him)

(At lunchtime, everyone is grabbing their lunches from the lunch line. Sam is walking towards his table. On his way there, he passes a table where one of the students is admiring him. That student is 18 year old Kelly Rutherford-Menskin. Yes, the brunette Kelly from Stupid Spoiled Whore episode. Unlike the other girls, she hasn't gotten over her crush on Sam)

(Kelly Rutherford-Menskin has her brunette hair tied up in a ponytail, and she is wearing black framed glasses, an orange sleeveless button up shirt, black jeans, and orange shoes. She also has a golden necklace that also acts as a locket. Inside the locket is a picture of Sam)

Kelly: (Looks at Sam as he passes and she sighs) Oh, Sam (She gets flashbacks to when they dated, and Sam took her to the South Park Elementary School Dance) He was so cute and such a charmer. He knew exactly how to treat a girl (End flashbacks) I wonder if he's still like that?

(Kelly gets up from her seat and follows Sam to his table. At Sam's table, he's hanging out with his old crew, Kurt, Bridgette, and Ursula, as well as Red and Wendy)

Sam: Here's to Mac and Cheese Monday, everybody!

Kurt: Yeah, praise the mac!

Bridgette: And the cheese!

(They begin to chow down as Red is ready to confess her feelings to Ursula)

Red: Hey…Ursula.

Ursula: What's up, Red?

Red: I'm not sure how to say this but…I love…utensils!

Ursula: You love utensils?

Red: No, I mean I…love…unicorns!

Ursula: You love unicorns?

Red: Uh, yes! I am absolutely crazy about unicorns! Twilight and Rarity are best ponies! (Blushes out of embarrassment) Oh boy. Excuse me, I have to use the restroom (She leaves).

Kurt: (Thinks to himself) Poor girl. She can't tell Ursula how she feels. I don't know if it's just shyness or she's afraid of rejection.

(Kelly then arrives to the table)

Kelly: (Wraps her arms from behind him) Hey, Sam!

Sam: (Somewhat uncomfortable) Uh, 'sup Kelly.

Kelly: Just wanted to come and say hello (Giggles to herself)

(Wendy looks over at Kelly, as if she's getting jealous)

Sam: Uh, I don't know if you've all met Kelly Rutherford-Menskin. But we used to date when we were kids.

Kurt: Yeah, we see her around the school.

Ursula: Is she one of the girls you saved from Justin all those years ago, Sam?

(Note: Yeah, most of the people in South Park know of the South Park Saints true identities. I probably should've mentioned that somewhere, but now you know XD)

Kelly: That's right! (Nuzzles Sam's neck) Sammy is always going to be my Superman, my Wonder Boy, my knight in shining armor!

(Wendy looks even more jealous)

Sam: I guess you still have a crush on me?

Kelly: It's been going strong for eight years now! I'm just waiting on the day where you finally come around and make us official.

Sam: Uh, Kelly, not that I mind getting hugged by you, but I'm trying to eat lunch. Can we do this some other time?

Kelly: Sure, I'm sorry. I'll bug you later!

(She leaves)

Wendy: (Under her breath) Cooze.

Bridgette: (Notices this) Oh, you called Kelly an obscenity under your breath, Wendy. Do I sense jealousy?

Wendy: What?! No, I'm not jealous!

Bridgette: (Whispers in her ear) You're in love with Sam aren't you?

Wendy: Ssshhh!

Sam: What are you girls prattling on about?

Wendy: Nothing! It doesn't concern you.

Sam: (Shrugs his shoulders) Alright.

Jeffrey: (Over the intercom) Attention students, a man by the name of Smiles wants to see you all after lunch in the auditorium for a special announcement.

(After lunch, the students make their way to the auditorium to see Smiles. Smiles himself comes out from underneath the stage as smoke machines go off. When he appears, everyone claps out of politeness)

Smiles: Hello, South Park High School! Now, I have a name just like all of you, but for right now, I want you all to call me Smiles! I am here to tell you about the opportunity of a lifetime: A talent show that I'm holding on my own T.V station: Smiley-Vision! And guess what, I'm going to audition you all if you want your 15 minutes of fame!

(The audience cheers)

Smiles: After school today, I'll be here in this auditorium holding auditions for my new show! I already went to North Park and got auditions there for the first episode. Now I'm here in South Park to get auditions for episode two! So if you all think you have what it takes, come back here after school and audition! That's all I have to say, Smiles out!

(The audience cheers some more at Smiles goes off stage, we cut to Smiles as he walks off stage)

Smiles: (Chuckles evilly) Those idiots! They actually believe that they're auditioning for a talent show, but really they're auditioning for a spot on Death T.V! Once they get on my show, they'll be forced to fight my four best henchmen, and they'll promptly lose and be reduced to nothing but a big bloody mess! And then, I'll harvest their blood like I did those poor saps in North Park! (Chuckles evilly) It feels so good to be bad!

(Back outside the auditorium, everyone is a buzzing about the talent show, especially Maria)

Maria: Oh boy, a talent show! I am so auditioning!

Apollo: If you want to audition, why don't you try using your magic and telekinesis?

Maria: I don't believe in using my powers for anything, you know that?

Apollo: Hmph, pitiful.

Maria: So, brother, do you plan on auditioning?

Apollo: Hell no!

David: Yeah, that's because homeboy lacks any talent

(Apollo then uses his powers to untie David's shoelaces and tie them together so he'd trip and fall)

David: What the hell?

Apollo: I'm off to History, good day! (He leaves)

(After school, a whole slew of students from 9th-12th grade audition: First is a 10th grade boy who tries to break dance)

10th grader: Oh yeah, watch this! (Tries to break dance) Watch me whip, watch me nay-nay, baby! Yeah!

Smiles: Next!

(Next is a 9th grader girl who tries to juggle)

9th grader: Okay, here we go! (Starts to juggle, but she drops her balls) Sorry, can I start again? (She juggles again, but drops her balls again) This time for real! One more time! (She juggles one more time, and drops them again) I haven't juggled in a while, so I'm a little rusty.

(Next is a 12th grader boy who tries to play on his cello)

12th grader: (Finishes playing his song) So, what do you think?

Smiles: I think….NEXT!

12th grader: (Packs up his cello) Hmph! Philistine! (Storms off stage)

(Next we have an 11th grade girl who tries to sing a song)

11th grader: (Singing) I knew you were trouble when you walked in! So shame on me now! Flew me to places I'd never been. 'Till you put me down. Oh! I knew you were trouble when you walked in! So shame on me now! Flew me to places I'd never been. Now I'm lying on the cold hard ground! Oh, oh, trouble, trouble, trouble!

Smiles: NEXT!

(After auditioning a few more students, Smiles was starting to lose hope)

Smiles: Ugh, I can't find anyone with good fighting spirit to compete on my show! I mean, nobody wants to see a curb-stomp battle with my mooks versus weaklings like these. I need someone with muscle, someone with skills, I need a fighter!

(Suddenly, Smiles' butler comes up to him)

Butler: Mr. Smiles, sir.

Smiles: What do you want?!

Butler: I just got done talking with the principal of this school, Mr. Stevens, and he said that we should consider auditioning some of the South Park Saints.

Smiles: South Park Saints?

Butler: Yes, sir. They're the group of superheroes that took on Damien and lived to tell the tale. Mr. Stevens says we should let them on the show and give the group good publicity.

Smiles: I like this idea. So, who are these saints?

Butler: Mr. Stevens showed me a picture of some of them. (A door to the auditorium is heard opening) Ah, there's some of them now.

(Smiles turns around and is shocked at what he sees…even though you can't see it because of the smiley face mask. Anyway, Smiles sees Sam, Wendy, Red, Annie, Clyde, Ursula, Bridgette, and Kurt and immediately recognizes the former five students)

Smiles: I know those five. I recognize those faces from anywhere. They certainly have grown up over the past eight years, haven't they?

Butler: Yes sir.

Smiles: I want them! (Stands up) Everyone, auditions are closed, thanks for coming!

Students: (Disappointed) Awww…

(After school, Sam, Wendy, Red, Annie, Clyde, Ursula, Bridgette, and Kurt are walking home together when a black limousine pulls over next to them)

Clyde: What the heck?

(The window rolls down and it's Smiles)

Annie: Hey, you're that talent show guy.

Smiles: Yes I am! And a little birdie told me that you eight are members of the South Park Saints. Why don't you all hop in my limo, and we'll have a little chat.

Kurt: Not a chance, our parents told us to never talk to strangers!

Smiles: (Holds up plates of Digiorno Pizzas) I have Digiorno!

(The teenagers' faces glow)

Kurt: But then again we're all 18 years old, making us legal adults in the eyes of the United States, and we're allowed to make our own decisions.

(All eight teenagers hop into the limousine and it drives off. Inside the limo, the eight teenagers are gobbling up the Digiorno pizzas)

Kurt: If we die right here right now because we hopped in this limousine, I'm glad that my last meal was Digiorno!

Red: I know, right, so good! (Turns her attention towards Smiles) So, what's up with you?

Smiles: As I said, someone told me that you eight are members of the South Park Saints, correct?

Sam: That's right!

Smiles: Well, the person that told me about you guys, the principal of your high school, said that it would bring lots of publicity to your organization if the eight of you appeared on my talent show and showcased you wicked awesome skills. Think about it: The South Park Saints will be a national phenomenon. You're already big here in South Park, just imagine how big you'd all be if you took your fame nationwide on national television!

Ursula: Hmm, I like this idea. I'm in!

Red: Yeah, I am too.

Sam: I think we're all in on this, right guys?

All: Right!

Sam: Awesome! I can see it now. The lot of us will be famous, our names in big flashing lights! We already have Store Justice here in town! Imagine dozens, hundreds, thousands of other Store Justices across America! I bet we'll be so big, we'll get our own T.V show, our own comics, hell, maybe even our own movie deal! And if we really get lucky, we might get our own theme park in Orlando! Oh, I'm so excited! So, when are we meeting up?

Smiles: This Saturday at the Denver Pepsi Stadium in Denver! I have stages set up there already. You eight just have to worry about showing up in your superhero gear and ready to showcase your skills, okay?

All: Okay!

(The limousine pulls over and the eight teens get out)

Smiles: Well, I'll see you eight on Saturday! Don't forget to brush up on your skills!

Clyde: Don't worry, we won't!

Bridgette: See you around, Mr. Smiles, sir!

(The limousine speeds off as the eight teenagers wave after her)

Wendy: We've got to tell our friends! We're going to be famous!

Sam: We've got to tell everyone to tune in to Smiley-Vision this Saturday! We're going to be famous, baby!

(He runs down the street cheering and shouting, jumping all the while)

Annie: Wow, Sam can be quite the excitable fellow.

Wendy: Yeah, he really can be.

(We cut to the big day, Saturday! Sam, Wendy, Kurt, Annie, Red, Ursula, Bridgette, and Clyde are already making their way to Denver, getting a ride from Wendy's father. We cut to Bebe, who is walking up the walkway to Cody's mansion, as she wants to get Cody so that the two of them, as well as Jeffrey, Alex Slave, and Dr. Sophocles can attend the event as spectators. They've already picked up Alex, so now they just need to get Cody and Dr. Sophocles)

Bebe: (Knocks on the door) Hello, Codykins! You're beautiful flower is here!

Sophocles: (Opens the door) Hey, Bebe, what's up?

Bebe: Is Cody home?

Sophocles: Yeah. He's up in his room.

Bebe: Can I see him?

Sophocles: Of course! Come right on in.

(Bebe enters the mansion and Sophocles guides her to Cody's room)

Bebe: So what's Cody been up to? I haven't heard from him in about a week.

Sophocles: He's been busy trying to figure out who the other seven advocates are.

Bebe: Really? I hope he's found something then.

Sophocles: He's my nephew, Bebe. He never gives up, I'm sure he's found something by now.

(Sophocles opens Cody's bedroom door and they find him sleeping on the floor with books strewn all over the place)

Bebe: Cody!

Cody: (Wakes up) Huh, what? (Sees Bebe and Sophocles) Oh, darling, uncle, nice to see you two.

Bebe: Cody, what happened here?

Cody: I can't find any information! I looked in every book, every website, and I can't find anything about these other seven advocates. I'm dead in the water!

Bebe: Have you been doing this all week? If you have, you need to calm down about this.

Cody: (Sarcastically) Oh yeah, sure, I'll calm down about it. It's only the fate of the world we're talking about! If we don't know who the other seven advocates are, then there is no way we can stop them! They're going to keep harvesting blood and then break these 13 stones, and the next thing you know, Damien will be revived! I'm so stressed out about this I might just take up my uncle's smoking habit!

Sophocles: I wouldn't recommend it.

Cody: (Sighs as he comes to his senses) I didn't mean to snap at you darling. I just get snappy if I don't get sleep.

Bebe: You haven't slept?

Cody: Yeah, all week. I had to find something out about the other advocates, and I wouldn't rest until I learned something.

Bebe: Honey, you should take a break. Want to come with us and watch our friends compete on a talent show.

Cody: I heard about that. Wendy went crazy on Facebook about it. (Gets up) If it'll get my mind off of this whole advocate thing, I'll come. Just hang on.

(He runs to his closet and gets everybody's superhero costumes)

Cody: You know, in case something happens and we need to stop it.

Sophocles: Right.

(The three of them leave the mansion and head off for Denver. We cut to when Bebe, Cody, Sophocles, Jeffrey, and Mr. Slave arrive to the stadium. The five of them are carrying some snacks for the show. Doug Testaburger waves the five of them down and they sit with him. It's at that moment that they notice Maria and Apollo there with them)

Bebe: Hey, Maria, Apollo, what's up?

Maria: Nothing, I just came to see the show.

Apollo: I would've loved to stay home, but Maria pretty much dragged me here against my will.

Maria: Aw, lighten up, brother! You need something like this to get out and meet people! You'll never experience life if you stay back at the apartment and read books.

Apollo: I was happier doing that but whatever.

Alex Slave: Well he's just a ray of sunshine, isn't he?

Sophocles: (Holding a pack of cigarettes) Anybody know what the smoking policy is here?

(In another part of the stadium, Kelly Rutherford-Menskin is watching the game)

Kelly: Knock 'em dead, Sammy!

(Meanwhile, in the green room, the eight teenagers are dressed in their superhero garb and ready for the show)

Stadium worker: (Enters the room) Five minutes until the show starts, guys.

Sam/Sir Justice: Okay guys, this is it! Get ready to become big!

Stadium worker: According to this clip board, Sam and Wendy go on first, then Kurt and Annie, followed by Clyde and Bridgette, and then Ursula and Red. Okay, good luck!

Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: We should probably get out there early, Sam.

Sam/Sir Justice: Good call. Make a fashionable entrance. Okay guys, we're out!

Kurt/Smith the Kid: Good luck out there you two.

Sam/Sir Justice: Thanks.

(Wendy and Sam leave the green room and make their way to the stadium. We cut to the main stadium where Smiles comes out to the center of the arena and a microphone lowers to him)

Smiles: Hello, Denver, are you ready to rock!

(The audience cheers)

Smiles: Excellent, because we have a special treat for you all on the second episode of Death T.V!

(With Doug and company)

Doug: Death T.V? What an odd name for a talent competition.

Cody: Am I the only one not feeling comfortable all of the sudden?

(Back at center stage)

Smiles: We have eight of the South Park Saints here with us today, and they're ready to dazzle us with their amazing skills! Here's what's going to happen. There are going to be four rounds, and two of the eight saints are going to compete in each round against one of my four fighters! If they can beat my fighters, then they can face off against me!

(The audience cheers more as we cut back to Kelly)

Kelly: (Getting nervous) Fighters? What is all of this?

(Back with Smiles)

Smiles: So let's introduce our first two saints. To my left, we have Sir Justice and the Fuchsia Tigress!

(Wendy and Sam enter the stadium as the audience cheers)

Sam/Sir Justice: (Waves at the audience) Yes, hello, I know, we're great!

Smiles: And then we have their competition, weighing in at 350 lbs, that's muscle, here comes Big Moe!

(On the right of the stadium, a 7 foot tall and ridiculously muscular man enters the stadium. He has a black Mohawk, a black wrestler singlet, and he's carrying around a huge spiked ball and chain)

Sam/Sir Justice: This is our competition?

Smiles: That's right, Sir Justice! To win, all you two have to do is kill Big Moe before he kills you.

Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Kill?! Hold the phone! I thought you said this was a talent contest.

Smiles: Oh, you pink idiot! I only said that so you'd enter my show! Anyway, good luck to the both of you, you're going to need it! (He leaves)

Sam/Sir Justice: We're in some deep shit now!

(In the green room, the other six saints are looking nervous, now seeing what the show's true intentions are. We cut to the Saints that are watching the competition)

Apollo: Heh, this shit is getting interesting!

Doug: (Gets up) I'm not going to stand by and watch this happen! Hang on, Wendy, I'm coming!

Bebe: Me too.

Cody: I'm right behind you two!

Sophocles: I think we should let them fight.

Cody: Huh?

Sophocles: I've seen these guys' fighting spirit. I know if we let them be, they can pull of a victory. And the same goes for the other six saints that are lying in wait. Let's sit and see what happens.

Doug: I hope you're right. But the moment something goes wrong, I'm running into that arena.

(Cut to Smiles)

Smiles: Let's see what arena these three will be fighting in!

(A spinner that has pictures of a rock, an iceberg, a water droplet, and a leaf is shown and it lands on the rock)

Smiles: And it's the rock field! (Rocks randomly pop up in the battlefield) Let the battle begin!

Big Moe: I'm gonna crush you all!

Sam/Sir Justice: You think we can take him?

Wendy: Anything is possible.

Big Moe: Here I come, Spiked Smash!

(He swings his ball and chain and the two saints dodge the attack)

Sam/Sir Justice: Let's go! (Takes out his pistols) Bebe's Bullets!

(He fires rounds of bullets, but they don't seem to faze Big Moe)

Big Moe: Spiked Swing! (He swings his ball and chain)

Sam/Sir Justice: (Whips out his shield) Annie's Shield!

(The ball and chain hits the shield, but the impact sends Sam/Sir Justice flying into a rock wall. Big Moe smirks at this, but isn't paying attention to Wendy, who is standing atop a rock formation. She jumps off of it and readies a punch as her boxing glove starts to ignite)

Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Flaming Knuckle!

(She hits Big Moe hard in the face with her fiery fist and knocks Big Moe on his ass)

Big Moe: You're a bad girl, time for a punishment! (He raises his ball and chain)

Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Uh-oh!

Big Moe: Here we go!

Sam/Sir Justice: Hey, steroid boy! (Big Moe turns his attention towards Sam) Eat this, Falcon's Blast! (He fires the falcon like blast and hits Big Moe in the area where Wendy hit him) You okay, Wendy?

Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Yeah, thanks!

Sam/Sir Justice: Don't thank me yet, we still have this big motherfucker to deal with!

Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Right! Let's attack together!

Sam/Sir Justice: Got it! Falcon's Blast! (Fires the falcon like blast)

Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Wrath of the Tigress! (Fires a huge fire ball from her boxing gloves, think Mario's Final Smash in the Smash Bros. Games)

Big Moe: (Gets back up) Not so fast! (He swings his ball and chain like a fan and blows the two attacks away) I'm going to win this game by a landslide!

(He whacks a big rock formation with his ball and chain, causing rocks to come flying towards our two heroes)

Sam/Sir Justice: Look out!

Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: I got this! Wrath of the Tigress! (Fires her fire balls at the rocks, breaking most of them)

Sam/Sir Justice: Bebe's Bullets! (Fires his bullets at the remaining rocks, breaking them) Is that all you got?

Big Moe: That's it! Quaking Fists!

(He slams on the ground hard, causing the ground beneath Sam and Wendy to shake. The power was so great that some of the audience could feel the vibrations. Eventually the quaking subsides. But while Sam and Wendy are still trying to get their bearings straight, Big Moe uses his opportunity to attack)

Big Moe: The bird man is first!

Sam/Sir Justice: Huh, what?!

Big Moe: Spiked Slam!

(He jumps up and is ready to slam Sam to the ground, but Wendy gets in front of him)

Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Leave him alone!

(She uses her Flaming Knuckle attack to knock the attack back! It works and the impact causes the spiked ball and chain to break)

Big Moe: Oh boy!

Sam/Sir Justice: Wow, Wendy, you saved me!

Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Consider it my way of returning the favor for saving me a few moments ago. Now let's finish this fucker!

Sam/Sir Justice: You got it!

Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: (Jumps up in the air) Raging Kick! (She comes down on Big Moe with a vicious kick, and knocks him on his ass)

Sam/Sir Justice: (Jumps up in the air next and takes out his ligthsaber) Big Moe, you're nothing but a big loser!

Big Moe: No, stop, wait!

Sam/Sir Justice: Red's Blade! (He impales Big Moe through the heart and kills him. Everybody cheers)

Smile: (Under his breath) Damn… (Speaks into microphone) Sir Justice and Fuchsia Tigress win!

(Everyone cheers some more)

Sophocles: See, what did I tell you all. I knew they'd be fine.

Doug: I suppose you're right.

(Back at the main arena, some of Smiles' servants drag Big Moe's corpse out of the arena )

Smiles: Sir Justice and Fuchsia Tigress will advance to Round 2 where they will face off against me. You two have done well. Now head back to the green room for some R&R!

(Sam and Wendy go back to the green room where they are greeted with loads of praise from their other six teammates)

Red/Madame Knight: Nice work you guys!

Clyde/Mosquito: Yeah! You did great!

Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Thank you, guys!

Sam/Sir Justice: I just can't believe Smiles lied to us. We thought this was a talent show but it's some kind of fucked up show where we kill each other for others enjoyment. We've regressed back to the days of gladiator battles.

Kurt/Smith the Kid: Or this is Smiles' own version of that Wii game Mad World. (Everyone gives him strange looks) What? I can't be the only one who played that game. (Everyone still looks at him strange) Wow, just wow.

Sam/Sir Justice: Save your anger and annoyance for when you and Annie are next to go out there and fight.

Annie/Darling Dame: Speaking of which, we're next, aren't we?

Kurt/Smith the Kid: Yeah.

Sam/Sir Justice: Okay, here's the plan. Wendy and I are a-shooing for round 2. All you guys have to do is not die, and make sure you take out whoever your opponents are. And then, when the eight of us make it to Round 2, we're going to teach Smiles a lesson or two for lying to us! Who's with me?!

(His teammates cheer)

Stadium Worker: Annie Knitts and Kurt Smith, you two are next.

Kurt/Smith the Kid: (Turns to Annie) What do you say, darling, are you ready to give these guys a show they'll never forget?

Annie/Darling Dame: Oh yes!

(The two of them leave as we cut to Smiles deciding what the next arena will be)

Smiles: What is the next battlefield going to consist of?

(The spinner lands on the water droplet)

Smiles: And it's the Water Field!

(The arena floor opens up and forms a pool of water with 9 small platforms floating in the water)

Smiles: Now let's introduce our next fighters. Representing the Saints, we have Smith the Kid and Darling Dame!

(The audience cheers as Annie and Kurt come out from the right of the arena and jump on one of the nine islands)

Smiles: And on the left of the arena, we have the one and only, Fish Man Jones!

(Nothing comes from the left side of the arena)

Kurt/Smith the Kid: Nothing is coming.

Smiles: Oh, he's here. You two just don't know it yet.

(We cut to a first person view of Fish Man Jones underwater (akin to Morpha from Ocarina of Time and Gyorg from Majora's Mask) he swims around for a big before looking up at one of the platforms. He swims upward and leaps in the air, landing on one of the platforms across from Annie and Kurt)

(Fish Man Jones has yellow eyes, sharp teeth, black hair, a pair navy blue swim trunks, gills on the sides of his torso, and webbed feet and hands with sharp nails)

(Annie and Kurt are shocked at what they see)

Kurt/Smith the Kid: What the hell is this?

Annie/Darling Dame: Did your mother make love to a shark?

Fish Man Jones: It's called a birth defect, bitch!

Smiles: Let the battle begin!

(Annie and Kurt immediately grab their uzis and revolvers)

Annie/Darling Dame: We're going to make Fillet o' Fish out of you! Bullets of the Rising Sun!

Kurt/Smith the Kid: Radiant Revolver!

(The two fire explosive bullets at Fish Man Jones, but he dives into the water before the bullets reach him)

Annie/Darling Dame: Where did he go?

(Suddenly, the island they're standing on begins to shake and rock back and forth. Fish Man Jones is swimming really hard into the island Kurt and Annie are standing on)

Kurt/Smith the Kid: He's trying to knock us off the platform!

Annie/Darling Dame: We can't fall into the water! That's exactly what he wants! (She opens up her wingpack and holds onto Kurt) Hang on!

(The two of them fly up in the air, but Fish Man Jones jumps onto one of the platforms, looks up at the two fighters, and opens his mouth)

Fish Man Jones: Bubble Breath! (He blows a swarm of bubbles up at the two fighters, causing them to get lost in the bubble storm)

Kurt/Smith the Kid: I can't see!

(Fish Man Jones jumps up into the bubble storm and appears in front of Kurt and Annie)

Kurt/Smith the Kid: No way!

Fish Man Jones: Fish Slap!

(He slashes Annie right on her arms, causing her to let go of Kurt. Kurt goes falling back to the arena and Fish Man Jones follows him)

Annie/Darling Dame: Kurt!

(Kurt lands in the water, but before he could get back on one of the islands Fish Man Jones tackles Kurt into the water, and attempts to drown him)

Kurt/Smith the Kid: (Struggling to break free as Fish Man Jones has him pinned down under the water)

Fish Man Jones: What's the matter? Can't breath? Bet you wish you had a pair of gills like these! (Laughs sadistically)

(Meanwhile, back in the air above the stadium, Annie looks down, ready for a counterattack)

Annie/Darling Dame: Time to save my boyfriend! (The gemstones on her wingpack's butterfly wings begin to glow) Butterfly's Maelstrom!

(Colorful beams of light emerge from the wing's gemstones, all the colors of the rainbow (Red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, and violet) and they dive into the water. One of the beams manages to hit Fish Man Jones in the back, causing him to let go of Kurt. Kurt kicks Fish Man Jones in the face before swimming back to the surface and setting foot on one of the islands)

Kurt/Smith the Kid: (Pants as he sees Annie float down to his side) Thanks babe! I owe you one!

Annie/Darling Dame: Don't worry about it! Right now I'm focused on how we're going to fry this oversized fish!

Fish Man Jones: The only thing that's going to get fried around here is you and your boyfriend, butterfly girl! (Lunges himself at the two fighters) Megaton Jaws! (Opens his mouth wide)

Kurt/Smith the Kid: (Takes out his Gatling Gun) Wild Wild Gatling! (He fires a round of bullets into Fish Man Jones' mouth, knocking him back and causing his mouth to bleed)

Fish Man Jones: Hey, that's not fair.

Kurt/Smith the Kid: (Takes out his revolvers) Moonshine Blaster!

Annie/Darling Dame: (Takes out uzis) Sunshine Lazer!

(The two fire their beams, but Fish Man Jones jumps into the water to dodge the attack)

Annie/Darling Dame: Now where is he?

Kurt/Smith the Kid: (Points in the water) Follow the cloud of blood!

(The two look and see the cloud of blood in the water. That cloud is where Fish Man Jones is)

Kurt/Smith the Kid: I think it's time we flush this fishy!

Annie/Darling Dame: Couldn't agree more! (She opens up her butterfly wings again and fires up her gemstones) Butterfly Maelstrom!

(The rainbow beams fire from her wings and land in the water, creating an explosion that sends Fish Man Jones flying upward)

Kurt/Smith the Kid: This is it! Shoot, shoot, shoot!

Annie/Darling Dame: Oh, uh, of course! (Takes out her uzis and starts firing upward) Bullets of the Rising Sun!

Kurt/Smith the Kid: (Takes out his Gatling gun) Wild Wild Gatling!

Fish Man Jones: (Looks at the two attacks coming at him) Fluke me. (He gets hit by the two attacks and falls back to the arena dead and covered in bullet holes. The audience cheers some more)

Smiles: Crap, they won too! (Speaks in the microphone) Darling Dame and Smith the Kid are the winners! (The audience cheers some more. In the green room, the rest of the Saints chosen to compete are going wild as well) Head back to the green room you two.

(Annie and Kurt go back to the green room)

Kurt/Smith the Kid: (Enters the green room with Annie) Aw yeah, we did it!

Ursula/Samurai of Light: You guys totally rocked that!

Annie/Darling Dame: Thanks. It wasn't easy, though.

Kurt/Smith the Kid: No kidding, I almost got drowned to death!

Stadium worker: Okay, Clyde Donovan and Bridgette Powell are next!

Bridgette/Singing Angel: (Prays to herself) Heavenly father, forgive us for the trespasses we are about to commit. Please watch over me and my Clydey-Wydey as we fight to the death against whatever may await us. Amen. (To Clyde) This is it, sweetie, break a leg!

Clyde/Mosquito: Yeah. And, one more thing. (He removes his stinger real fast and kisses Bridgette on the lips and she blushes. He puts his stinger back on) In case we die, I wanted to share one more kiss with you.

Bridgette/Singing Angel: Aw, Clyde, you're the sweetest thing ever!

The other six saints: Awwwwwww…..

Stadium worker: Come on, you two, we don't have all day!

Clyde/Mosquito: Right, sorry!

(Bridgette and Clyde head for the main stage as Smiles decides the next arena they'll be fighting on. The spinner lands on the picture of the iceberg)

Smiles: The ice field is the next battlefield! (The arena opens up to reveal an landscape completely covered in snow and ice) Things are about to get a little bone chilling in here. But I digress! Let's introduce the next two saints: The Singing Angel and Mosquito!

(Clyde and Bridgette come out of the right part of the arena)

Smiles: And now, their opponent. Come on out Little Johnny!

(A short midget of a man comes out from the left side of the arena. He's wearing a navy blue suit with black loafers and a red tie and he's carrying around a gray briefcase. Little Johnny is also bald with brown sideburns and he has brown framed glasses. Having seen their opponent, Clyde and Bridgette begin to laugh like a pack of hyenas)

Clyde/Mosquito: No freaking way! This is our opponent?! This guy?! A midget businessman?!

Bridgette/Singing Angel: I know I shouldn't be making fun of people like him, but this is too funny.

(The two continue to laugh as Little Johnny just glares at them)

Little Johnny: So, you think my height is funny? You think I'm here to amuse you? Well think again you shitty brats!

Clyde/Mosquito: (Sarcastically) Oh no! He's getting all mad! I'm so scared!

Bridgette/Singing Angel: (Sarcastically) Please, don't hurt us! What are you going to do to us? Beat us to death with that brief case?

Little Johnny: (Grins evilly) In a way…yes!

(Little Johnny uses the combination lock for his brief case and it morphs into a giant grey colored Transformer-like mecha! A door on the chest opens up and some stairs lower down. Little Johnny climbs up the stairs as the door closes. Inside the mech, Little Johnny sits down on a chair, sips on a cup of coffee. The audience gasps in shock, especially the likes of Doug, Bebe, Cody, Maria, Apollo, Mr. Alex Slave, Jeffrey, Dr. Sophocles, and Kelly)

(Back on the ice field, Clyde and Bridgette look up at the huge mecha with looks of shock and fear on their faces)

Little Johnny: So, who is the little man now?

Bridgette/Singing Angel: Clyde…

Clyde/Mosquito: Yeah?

Bridgette/Singing Angel: You do realize that this is probably God's way of teaching us a lesson on how we shouldn't make fun of midgets?

Clyde/Mosquito: Most likely.

Bridgette/Singing Angel: (Inhales deeply) Well, we're here now. We might as well try and win! (Gets in fighting stance)

Clyde/Mosquito: You know it, babe!

Little Johnny: Let's get down to business, pipsqueaks!

Clyde/Mosquito & Bridgette/Singing Angel: BRING IT ON!

TO BE CONTINUED…

(Author's Note: Sorry for no credits song for part 1. I'm also sorry for any plot-holes that I may have lazily covered up like the bullcrap excuse on how almost everyone in South Park knows of the Saints true identity. Anyway, next up in Part 2 of Death T.V, Clyde and Bridgette fight against Little Johnny, and then Red and Ursula fight against their opponent. Also, Smiles true identity will be revealed. Who it going to be? Find out next time same fanfic time…same fanfic account…..#sorrynotsorry)