The Legend of Sir Justice and the South Park Saints: Episode 14: Teacher's Pet (Part 3)
(This part of the episode picks up where the last one left off: With a brainwashed Doug/Cerulean Viper throwing Kelly into a cage and locking it. They appear to be in some kind of large closet)
Kelly: Mr. Testaburger, can you hear me? It's me, Kelly Rutherford-Menskin! I'm one of your daughters' friends! Why the hell are you locking me up!
Doug/Cerulean Viper: You are an intruder and allied with the South Park Saints. I must lock you up. Now just stay there. Ms. Marlowe and I will deal with you later (Begins to leave).
Kelly: Hey, come back here! Stop! Let me out! Are you even listening?! Mr. Testaburger, please!?
(Doug just keeps walking and closes the closet door behind him. It's at that moment when Ms. Marlowe walks up to him)
Marlowe: So, Douglas, did you take care of our little problem?
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Yes, Master Marlowe.
Marlowe: (Hugs him) Yes, Douglas. That's a good boy. My teacher's pet!
(Intro song: Resonance by T.M Revolution)
(The intro starts with the town of South Park, and a teenaged Damien looks down on the town from atop a hill)
(Tsunaida tamashii no hi ga mune wo sasu nara? Kotoba yori motto tsuyoi hibiki ga ima kikoeru ka?)
(Enemy soldiers dressed in black are attacking the town and spreading chaos and destruction)
(Roku ni me mo awasazu unmei ni made karandeku Yukisaki moro kabutteru kuenai yoru wo hashire)
(The main characters that include teenaged Samuel/Sir Justice, Kurt/Smith the Kid, Bridgette/the Singing Angel, Ursula/Samurai of Light, Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress, Bebe/Sharp Edge Stevens, Kenny/Mysterion, Cartman/Coon, Butters/Professor Chaos, Stan/Tool Shed, Kyle/Human Kite, Craig/DJ C-Rage, Tweek/Peppy Prince, Token/Tupper Wear, Clyde/Mosquito, Red/Madame Knight, Heidi/Fatal Feline, Annie/Darling Dame, Leon/Beo-Wolf, Mr. Slave/Glamorous Gardener, Jeffrey/Sgt. Stevens, Doug/Cerulean Viper, Cody/Mr. Gentleman, Dr. Sophocles, and Mephesto and his genetic experiments charge into the town ready for the fight of their lives. They all fight off the soldiers)
(Fukaoi shisugita mabushisa ga warui yume ni tsuzuite mo)
(Damien appears along with his 13 commanders (9 of which are Trent, Justin, Ethel, Max, Tobias Shredder, Paris Hilton in her Smiles mask and power suit, Dimitri, Charon, and Ms. Penelope Marlowe). Our heroes look at each other, smirk, pull out their weapons and fight)
(Tsunaida tamashii no hi ga mune wo sasu nara Kotoba yori motto tsuyoi hibiki ga ima kikoeru ka? Deatta wake wa dou datte ii mikitsukerarete Fureta shunkan no kizu no fun dake tashika ni nareru)
(Damien steps forward ready to face our heroes, and they prepare to clash as the title of the fanfic, "The Legend of Sir Justice and the South Park Saints" appears)
(We cut back to the outside, where the South Park Saints that aren't inside the mansion, are still fighting off Marlowe's forces)
Kurt/Smith the Kid: Keep fighting, gang! Give them hell! Moonshine Beam! (Fires a blue beam at a small group of henchmen)
(In the skies, some henchmen are trying to shoot down Clyde, Annie, Butters, and Kyle, but they dodge the bullets skillfully)
Clyde/Mosquito: Mosquito Mob: Bug Bullets! (Fires bullets from a gun at the minions)
Annie/Darling Dame: Butterfly's Maelstrom! (Fires rainbow colored beams from her wings at the minions)
Butters/Professor Chaos: Lightning Spear! (Tosses a spear made of lightning at the minions)
Kyle/Human Kite: Kite Harpoon! (Fires a harpoon from the top of his kite and impales one of the minions)
(Cut back to the Saints on ground level)
Heidi/Fatal Feline: (Gets bullet happy with her new gun as she fires at a bunch of henchmen) That's right, get no-scoped! GET NO-SCOPED! (As Heidi is shooting, a random minion with a machete is about to slash at her from behind)
Stan/Tool Shed: Heidi, look out! Hammer Cannon! (Fires an energy blast from the face of his hammer and hits the minion with the machete)
Heidi/Fatal Feline: Hey, hey, you saved me Stan, meow! (Hugs him)
Stan/Tool Shed: (Blushes) Anytime.
(Cut to Kenny and Maria, who are hiding behind one of the fences, taking an occasional moment to fire attacks)
Kenny/Mysterion: Oddity Grenade! (Tosses a grenade over the fence and it blows up) What the hell is taking those guys so long!? They should be back by now!
Maria/White Mind Maiden: Be patient, Kenny. They've only been in there for 15 minutes and it's a big mansion! Tell you what, I'll try and get in contact with them using my power!
Kenny/Mysterion: Great! (Takes out ray gun) I'll try and fight off some of these goons while you do that!
Maria/White Mind Maiden: Perfect! (She tries to get in contact with the Saints that are inside the mansion)
(With Sam and his party inside the mansion, they are wandering the halls trying to find Doug and Marlowe. Wendy is leading the way)
Cody/Mr. Gentleman: (Looks at a painting of Marlowe) Uh, didn't we pass that painting of Marlowe before?
Sophocles: It looks like it.
Cody/Mr. Gentleman: Uh, Wendy, not that I'm doubting you…but I think we're lost.
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: I know where we're going! (Thinks for a while) Wait, no I don't! You're right! We're lost! This sucks! (She punches a wall) For all I know my father is probably dead right now!
Sam/Sir Justice: I'm sure he's fine, Wen-Wen. Just calm down.
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: (Snaps) Don't tell me to calm down! It's not your father that's been kidnapped!
Sam/Sir Justice: (Gets scared) Uh, I'm sorry, sweetie. I just…I…
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: (Sighs) I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you like that. I'm just really stressed out about all of this.
Sam/Sir Justice: I understand. Believe me, I'm just as worried as you are. We are all just as nervous as you are.
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: And being lost in this maze of a mansion doesn't exactly help.
Maria/White Mind Maiden: Hello, can you guys hear me?
Tweek/Peppy Prince: Hey, is that Maria?
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: Sister, is that you?
Maria/White Mind Maiden: (Sarcastically) No, it's Betty White. Of course it's me! (Normal tone) So where are you guys?
Craig/DJ C-Rage: We're trying to figure that out now.
Maria/White Mind Maiden: So I guess you guys are lost?
Kevin: Yeah. It seems that way.
Maria/White Mind Maiden: I see. Apollo, you remember what Mr. Testaburger looks like, right?
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: Yes.
Maria/White Mind Maiden: Try searching for him using your powers.
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: Alright. I'll try. (He closes his eyes and he sees Doug in the inner sanctum of the mansion) I found him!
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Where is he!?
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: If I had to guess I'd say he's in the mansion's inner sanctum! We should go there!
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress & Sam/Sir Justice: Alright, Apollo! (They both hug Apollo, causing him to blush and look confused, having not known love like this)
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: Uh…I'm glad to be of help.
Bebe/Sharp Edge Stevens: What's wrong, Apollo? You look shy. Never been hugged before?
(Wendy and Sam release their hug on Apollo)
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: Not really. My father always told me that happiness, friendship, and love were all signs of weakness. And yet, you all show these three things, but manage to overcome adversity. Plus, in the past couple of hours, you've all made me laugh and showed me love. And, I can't believe I'm saying this, maybe someday…we can…become friends. Just don't go telling anybody else about this or I will not hesitate in beating you all senseless, got it?
Leon/Beo-Wolf: (Gives thumbs up) Message received, good buddy
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: (Uses his powers to get back in contact with Maria) Sis, we're heading for the mansion's inner sanctum!
Maria/White Mind Maiden: Perfect! Once things start to thin out here some of us will go in and help you out.
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Come on everyone, we're losing precious time!
Sam/Sir Justice: Right behind you, honey!
(Sam and Wendy run down the hallway, but they then pass a statue of Marlowe which starts to glow and an alarm goes off. The two teens turn towards the statue with scared expressions on their faces)
Tweek/Peppy Prince: Gah! What's happening!?
(Some of Marlowe's henchmen appear down the hallway in front of them)
Alex Slave/Glamorous Gardener: Oh, Jesus! We've got some mooks right in front of us!
Sophocles: (Sees more henchmen appear behind them) And some more right behind us!
(There are about 50 minions in all)
Kevin: They don't look so tough!
Cody/Mr. Gentleman: Let's see what you ruffians have in store!
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: Maria, we'll talk to you later. Because right now, it's time to take out the trash! (Shuts his powers off to take on Marlowe's men)
(Back outside, Maria begins to worry about her brother and comrades)
Kenny/Mysterion: What's the word?
Maria/White Mind Maiden: I think they're in trouble!
Kenny/Mysterion: What kind of trouble?
Maria/White Mind Maiden: I think they encountered more of Marlowe's minions! They need help! (She calls out) Hey, Ursula, Red!
Ursula/Samurai of Light: Yeah!
Red/Madame Knight: What's up?
Maria/White Mind Maiden: Apollo and our friends are in trouble! Can you two rush in there and help out?
Red/Madame Knight: No problem! We're on it!
(The two girls charge ahead and run through the crashed van blocking the entrance and enter the mansion. As that's going on, Mephesto is watching his Bearcupine utterly destroy a mob of guards with his quills, claws, and teeth)
Mephesto: That's it, Bearcupine! Keep up the pressure!
(Unbeknownst to Mephesto, a henchman that's bleeding out has enough energy to grab his gun and take aim at him)
Henchman #1: Nighty night, grandpa!
(The Bearcupine notices this and jumps in front of Mephesto. The Bearcupine takes the shot right between the eyes and falls to the ground)
Mephesto: Bearcupine, no! (Looks at the dying guard who is laughing) You!
Millie: (Rushes to Mephesto's aide) Courageous Spear Gun! (She fires the spear gun and hits the guard right in the forehead, killing him)
Mephesto: (Looks down at the dying Bearcupine) My Bearcupine…thank you. I'll never forget you. Rest well, my prince, you'll be with me always. (The Bearcupine closes its eyes as it draws its last breath when Kurt comes up to him and Millie)
Kurt/Smith the Kid: I knew that thing was going to die.
Millie: Yeah…oh well nothing lasts forever. Let's get back to fighting!
Mephesto: What about me?
Kurt/Smith the Kid: (Takes the gun from the dead guard and gives it to Mephesto) Ever used one of these before?
Mephesto: No, not recently anyway.
Millie: Well then you better learn fast, doc! (Kurt and Millie go back to fighting as Mephesto just stares at the gun that was given to him)
(Back inside the mansion, Sam and his team are fighting off Marlowe's men decently well)
(Fight #1: Cody and Bebe are up against 10 henchmen)
Bebe/Sharp Edge Stevens: Blade Storm! (Throws a bunch of blades from her bag and impales 9 of the 10 minions. The remaining minion lets out a sigh of relief when…)
Cody/Mr. Gentleman: Virtuous Katana! (He beheads the last minion)
(Fight #2: Sophocles vs. 5 henchmen)
Henchman #2: Kill him! (The henchmen charge at him)
Sophocles: (Dodges the attacks) Paralysis Pummel! (He hits the five henchmen's pressure points and they fall to the ground paralyzed. He turns to Cody and Bebe and says…) See you two, you don't always have to kill someone to defeat them.
Bebe/Sharp Edge Stevens: It's an action fanfic. What do you expect, kittens and rainbows?
(Fight #3: Tweek and Craig vs. 10 henchmen)
Tweek/Peppy Prince: Pom-Pom Wrap! (The ribbons on the pom-poms wrap the 10 henchmen up)
Craig/DJ C-Rage: (Has his boom box turn into armored hands) Boom Bop! (He punches the 10 henchmen hard and knocks them unconscious)
(Fight #4: Kevin and Cartman vs. 5 henchmen)
Henchman #3: (Looks at Kevin) Let's cook up some Hasenpfeffer!
Henchman #4: I'm with you! (The two henchman charge at Kevin)
Kevin: You want to cook me?! But I'm so unhealthy for you since I'm fast food! (Quickly jumps in the air to avoid attack) Not to mention my flavor has an awful kick! (He kicks the two guards unconscious when he comes back down) Plus a very painful aftertaste that's sure to leave you all sore. (Kevin sees the other three guards point guns at him)
Cartman/Coon: Rodent's Cleaver! (He beheads two of the guards and the last one points his gun at him, causing Cartman to whip out his RPG. He grins and calls out…) Raccoon Rocket! (Fires the RPG and the rocket sends the minion flying across the hallway. He hits the wall and ends up unconscious) He's going to be feeling that one in the morning.
(Fight #5: Jeffrey and Mr. Slave vs. 5 henchmen)
Jeffrey/Sgt. Stevens: Ravenous Rapier! (He impales one of the henchmen in the chest with his rapier and kills him)
Henchman #5: (Appears behind him and takes out his machete) You're going down old man!
Jeffrey/Sgt. Stevens: En garde! (The two engage themselves in a sword duel. They clash blades a few times before entering a struggle. It's at this moment another guard with a machete tries to stab Jeffrey in the back)
Alex Slave/Glamorous Gardener: Oh Jesus! Chainsaw Blaster! (The gun on his chainsaw fires a bullet right through the minion's head before he has a chance to even touch Jeffrey)
Jeffrey/Sgt. Stevens: Thanks, Alex. (Pushes away the minion he was in a struggle with) Take this! (Stabs him through the throat, killing him. Now there are two minions remaining. The two minions look nervous) Mighty Musket!
Alex Slave/Glamorous Gardener: Chainsaw Blaster! (The two attacks hit the two minions, killing them).
(Fight #6: Sam, Wendy, Apollo, and Leon vs the remaining 15 henchmen)
(The four teens are getting approached by the 15 minions)
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Tigress Trap! (Spouts of flames come from the knuckle of her boxing gloves, and they surround the henchmen) Okay boys, they're all yours.
Sam/Sir Justice: Thanks, hon! (Sam, Apollo, and Leon jump through the flames to face the henchmen) Bebe's Bullets! (Fires bullets from his guns at five minions, killing them)
Leon/Beo-Wolf: Claw Launcher! (Fires the claws on his pelt and kills the five minions he hits)
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: Psycho Arrow! (Fires blue arrows made of psychic energy and nails two of the last five minions in the throat, killing them. The last three fire their guns at him and Apollo just teleports away)
Henchman #6: Where did he go?
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: I wouldn't look up if I were you. (The three minions look up to Find Apollo just sitting on a chandelier that's above them) What did I just say? (A sword materializes in his hand. He slashes the chain holding the chandelier up, teleports outside of Wendy's fire wall, and the chandelier falls on the last three henchmen, either killing them or knocking them unconscious)
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: (Stops her fire wall) Wow, we did it!
Tweek/Peppy Prince: That's because we used the real superpower of team…
Cartman/Coon: NO! Tweek, we are not using that Sonic Heroes quote! Stop beating a dead horse!
Tweek/Peppy Prince: (Depressed) Okay…
Craig/DJ C-Rage: Hey guys, what are we going to do about the paralyzed minions that are still alive?
Sophocles: What do you mean?
Craig/DJ C-Rage: I mean, they're not dead or unconscious, they can still talk. If they scream or yell loud enough, more reinforcements will come for us.
Alex Slave/Glamorous Gardener: Don't worry. I got this. (Takes some seeds out of his bag) Sleepy Seeds! (Throws them at the paralyzed guards)
Henchman #2: Hey…what did you…(Snore)
(The paralyzed henchmen are asleep)
Alex Slave/Glamorous Gardener: Well, that takes care of that.
Sam/Sir Justice: Hey, everyone, over here!
(Everyone looks to see Sam at the end of the hallway. They follow him and they see a huge gilded door)
Cody/Mr. Gentleman: What a door!
Kevin: You think that door leads to the mansion's inner sanctum?
Leon/Beo-Wolf: Only one way to find out.
Sam/Sir Justice: Let's go everyone! But be very quiet and be very careful. Marlowe is definitely expecting us.
(The 13 Saints quietly walk down the hall, awaiting for the fight at hand. They eventually make it to the door and Sam holds out three fingers…then two…then one. When the last finger disappears, the 13 Saints bust the door open and take out their weapons ready to fight)
Leon/Beo-Wolf: Freeze!
(Everyone lowers their weapons at what they see…Marlowe in the center of the sanctum just sitting on a big red cushioned chair, sipping on tea. The room itself has wooden walls, four windows at each of the corners, a white marble floor, and a white marble fireplace with a fire burning inside it)
Marlowe: Ah, my guests have arrived.
Cartman/Coon: Okay, what's happening here?
Bebe/Sharp Edge Stevens: Is that Marlowe?
Sam/Sir Justice: Yup. That's her!
Marlowe: Please, saints, you've come all of this way. Have a seat and let me get you lot something to drink. What do you want: Water, tea, soda, juice, wine, spiders, milk…
Jeffrey/Sgt. Stevens: Did she just say spiders?
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: Yup. I think this might be another attempt for the writer to include an Undertale reference in this story.
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: I don't care what she's trying to do! I only came for one thing and one thing only!
Marlowe: You mean you're not tired after dealing with my minions.
Sam/Sir Justice: Not at all. We have plenty of energy to burn!
Marlowe: (Holds up a plate with a slice of cake on it) Can't I interest you all in a slice of cake? (Sam just shoots the cake off of the plate with his guns) I guess not.
Sam/Sir Justice: We're not here for cake, we're not here for tea, and we're certainly not here for spiders! We've come for Mr. Testaburger!
Marlowe: (Pretends to act innocent) Who?
Sam/Sir Justice: Don't get cute with us! You know exactly who we're talking about!
Marlowe: (Continues the act) No, I really don't.
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Look, you old windbag! I'm only going to ask you this once and only once: Where is my father!
Marlowe: Oh, you mean Douglas. Why didn't you just say so? (Gets up and walks away from the table) Okay, I'll give him back to you. But he's certainly changed a lot since you last saw him.
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Quit stalling and give him to us, now!
Marlowe: Say the magic words!
Sam/Sir Justice: (Whips out his lightsaber) Give Mr. Testaburger to us now or your limbs are getting cut clean the fuck off!
Marlowe: Oh fine. I guess I can't teach manners to a bunch of brats like you. (Calls up to the ceiling) Oh Douglas!
(The South Park Saints look up and they see Doug jump down from the chandelier on the ceiling and land on the table breaking it. He lands on his feet and he stares at our heroes with his lifeless eyes)
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Hello…
Cartman/Coon: No freaking way!
Sam/Sir Justice: Is that Mr. Testaburger!?
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: My God! Father, what has she done to you?!
(We then cut to Red and Ursula running through the halls of the mansion…and they are completely lost)
Ursula/Samurai of Light: Okay, whoever this Marlowe lady hired to build this place needs to get fired immediately because holy shit I don't know where we are anymore!
Red/Madame Knight: Every hallway looks the same. It's hard to tell each one apart from the other.
Ursula/Samurai of Light: Just our luck! Our friends need our help, and we can't even find them. (Suddenly, Ursula hears something)
Kelly: (From inside the closet) Help! Help me! Help!
Ursula/Samurai of Light: What was that?
Red/Madame Knight: It's coming from down that hallway!
(The two girls run to the sound of the cries, and get to the door that it's coming from. Red and Ursula take out their blades and bash the door in. The two girls are shocked to find Kelly in a cage)
Kelly: Oh thank God! Red, Ursula, you two found me!
Ursula/Samurai of Light: Aw man, it's that Kelly Ruther-Whatever her name is.
Red/Madame Knight: Kelly, how did you get here?
Kelly: I stowed away on the cargo plane and followed you guys. I figured if I saved Mr. Testaburger, Sam would realize that I'm a much better girl for him than Wendy. Turns out I bit off way more than I could chew. Anyway, can you two let me out of here?
Ursula/Samurai of Light: Sure thing! (She takes out a bobby pin from her kimono)
Red/Madame Knight: You actually carry around a bobby pin, sweetie?
Ursula/Samurai of Light: Don't judge me. (She uses the bobby pin to pick the lock and set Kelly free)
Kelly: Oh, thank you so much! (She hugs them both for a bit and then releases them) So what are you two doing here?
Ursula/Samurai of Light: We're trying to find our friends so we can help them fight off Marlowe. A task that turns out to be a lot harder than anticipated. But more important than that, we have to get you out of here. (Turns to Red) My red rose, can you get Kelly to safety while I look for Sam and company?
Red/Madame Knight: You got it, sweetie. But, will you be okay on your own?
Ursula/Samurai of Light: I'll be fine. Just worry about getting Kelly out of here.
Red/Madame Knight: Okay, I trust you.
Ursula/Samurai of Light: I'll meet you outside. Wish me luck! (Ursula runs down the hallway and Red leaves with Kelly, hoping to find an exit)
(We cut back to the mansion's inner sanctum)
Jeffrey/Sgt. Stevens: What have you done to Doug, Marlowe?
Marlowe: Isn't it obvious? I just read a recipe for a brainwashing pill, created said pill, and fed it to Douglas over here.
Sam/Sir Justice: Why, Marlowe? Why did you do this!?
Marlowe: I did it so I could have an extra edge for my assault on New Orleans.
Cody/Mr. Gentleman: What are you talking about? What assault?
Marlowe: No doubt you came across some of my vehicles. You know the helicopters, the vans, the tanks. Well, unlike the other four advocates that you defeated before me, I haven't even started on my blood harvest. That's because I wanted to wait until I had an army and an armory big enough to take New Orleans by storm. The final piece of my puzzle was Douglas. When I heard that he was a part of your team, I took it upon myself to figure out what his skills were. You know, to see if he met my criteria. Sure enough, he does, and now he works for me. I'd say that we're all set to raid New Orleans and take the citizens' blood for Damien, but first I had to wipe out you lot in case you tried to stop us. That's why I wasn't reluctant to invite you to my island. But to my surprise, you all managed to breeze through my minions with little to no problems. And here we are now.
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: So let me get this straight. You hired a huge army, obtained a shitload of vehicles somehow, kidnapped my father and brainwashed him, all so you can raid a city! And for what, more blood!?
Marlowe: Precisely. Maybe I'll even destroy the city. You know, burn it to the ground, make sure there are little to no survivors, all of that.
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Wow! You are probably the most evil advocate we've face so far!
Sam/Sir Justice: At least the last four we faced didn't want to lay waste to an entire city.
Marlowe: You lot just don't see the bigger picture. When Damien gets revived, he's going to destroy the entire world and rebuild it from the ground up. So it doesn't matter if I destroy the New Orleans now or Damien destroys the city later, it'll still be destroyed along with all of the other cities of the world.
Sam/Sir Justice: She needs to be stopped, and it looks like we're going to be the ones to do so!
(Lightsaber in hand Sam charges at Ms. Marlowe, who jumps in the air and dodges the attack, and lands near the doorway)
Sam/Sir Justice: For an old hag you sure do move quickly.
Marlowe: I'd love to stay and chat with you all, but I have to regroup and revamp my plan. I'm sure Douglas would love to play with you all though. Farewell! (She leaves)
Sam/Sir Justice: Hey, get back here!
(Sam attempts to chase after her, but he feels a hand get placed on his shoulder…it's Doug)
Sam/Sir Justice: Mr. Testaburger! It's me, Sam! Remember?
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Sam…No, you're the enemy! Freezing Fist!
(He hits Sam with his attack, and sends him falling to the floor. Wendy rushes to him and picks him up)
Craig/DJ C-Rage: Sam, are you okay?
Sam/Sir Justice: Yeah, just peachy. But Marlowe is getting away.
Sophocles: Don't worry about it. Jeffrey, Bebe, Cody, Kevin, Leon, and I will track her down. The rest of you just worry about Doug.
Sam/Sir Justice: Thanks, Sophocles. Be careful though.
Sophocles: No promises! (The six Saints leave the sanctum and go after Marlowe leaving the other seven to deal with Doug)
Sam/Sir Justice: So what do we do now?
Alex Slave/Glamorous Gardener: As much as it pains me to say this, I think we're going to have to fight him.
Sam/Sir Justice: I was afraid of that.
Craig/DJ C-Rage: It doesn't look like we have any other options. Maybe with any luck, we can knock some sense back into him!
Cartman/Coon: Let's do it! (He charges first and jumps in the air) Raccoon Slam! (Before Cartman could even slam down on him, Doug grabs him by the leg and tosses him into a wall)
Sam/Sir Justice: Holy shit! Cartman!
Cartman/Coon: Don't worry about me! Focus on Mr. Testaburger!
Tweek/Peppy Prince: On it! (Faces Doug) Sorry, Mr. T, but this is for your own good! Pom-Pom Wrap! (The ribbons on his pom-poms wrap Doug up) Craig! Help me out!
Craig/DJ C-Rage: You got it! (His boom box turns into arm cannons) My Decibel Destroyer attack is charging up as we speak!
Tweek/Peppy Prince: Perfect!
Craig/DJ C-Rage: Here we go! FIRE! (He fires a powerful blast from his arm cannons, but before the attack could reach him…)
Doug/Cerulean Viper: This…won't…hold me!
(Using his strength, Doug breaks free from Tweek's pom-poms and dodges out of the way of Craig's attack. He jumps in front of the two boys. Tweek and Craig look visibly frightened)
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Furious Flurry! (He unleashes a barrage of icy punches on the two boys before kicking them both into a wall) Next…
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: Psycho Bomb! (He fires a bomb made up of blue psychic energy and it hits Doug, sending him back a bit)
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Why you little! Viper's Cold Reception! (He fires an icy blast but Apollo teleports away) Now where did you go?
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: (Appears above him and forms a blue sword made of psychic energy) Psychic Slash!
Doug/Cerulean Viper: (Dodges quickly and grabs Apollo by the neck with his left hand when he lands)
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: Put me down!
Doug/Cerulean Viper: You need to chill out! (Using his glove, Apollo slowly starts to get covered in ice: Starting from the area of the neck where he's holding him and working its way up to his head and down to his torso)
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: Someone…please…help me!
Alex Slave/Glamorous Gardener: Oh Jesus! Chainsaw Slash! (He charges with his chainsaw, but Doug uses his right hand to block it…and the chainsaw starts to freeze over too!) Jesus Christ!
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Now this is the true meaning of a cold reception!
Sam/Sir Justice: Falcon's Blast! (He fires his attack at Doug and he releases Apollo and Alex Slave's chainsaw when it hit him) I'm sorry, Mr. Testaburger, but you left me no choice! I have to take you down!
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Bring it on little man.
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Sam, please don't do this.
Sam/Sir Justice: We don't have much of a choice, Wendy. I'm sorry…(Charges at Doug) But this has to be done! (He punches him in the face) Justice Roundhouse! (He roundhouse kicks Doug in the stomach and he falls on his knees only to get back up three seconds later) Still have some fight left in you I see? (He charges again ready to bunch) Fist of…
(Doug stops the attack by grabbing his fist)
Sam/Sir Justice: Aw shit. (Sam starts to freeze over, with ice creeping up his arm) OH SHIT! Let me go, Mr. Testaburger! Please, it's me Sam! You've got to remember me!
Doug/Cerulean Viper: I remember you. You're the enemy, wanting to foil my master's plans! I can't let you do that!
Craig/DJ C-Rage: (Looks up at Doug and Sam) Shit…Sam!
Sam/Sir Justice: Someone help me!
Doug/Cerulean Viper: I think Ms. Marlowe would love to have an ice sculpture of the South Park Saints' leader here in her sanctum.
Sam/Sir Justice: No! Let me go! Mr. Testaburger, I know the real you is still in there. You've got to fight whatever has overcome you!
(Doug just stares at Sam as the ice has completely covered his arm and is now making its way to the rest of his body)
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Goodbye Sam.
(Sam shuts his eyes as he waits for the ice to completely envelop him. But then…)
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: NO! (She pushes her father to the ground, resulting in him releasing Sam)
Doug/Cerulean Viper: (Gets back up) Wendy, my child…
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: I don't care if you're brainwashed! I won't have you hurting Sam!
Doug/Cerulean Viper: I must…for Marlowe!
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Dad! Do you hear yourself! Ms. Marlowe has brainwashed you! You've got to break whatever it is that's got a hold on you! And if beating you down is the only way to do so…I guess I have no choice.
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Come on then!
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Wrath of the Tigress! (Fires a fireball from her gloves, and Doug dodges by jumping over Wendy and landing right behind her)
Doug/Cerulean Viper: My daughter, you need to be punished! Furious Flurry! (He charges at her)
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Wildfire Smack Down! (She charges at him)
(Doug and Wendy trade a series of blows, icy and fiery, they stop to try and make another attack on each other)
Doug/Cerulean Viper & Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Raging Kick!
(They both kick each other in the face and push each other back)
Doug/Cerulean Viper: You've been a bad girl, my child. But now it's going to come to an end! (And icy wind that's coming from his gloves envelops him)
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Dad, please hear me! Remember who we are, not your enemies, but your friends, your family! (Flames that are coming from her gloves envelop her, but doesn't hurt her) Inferno Tackle! (She flies at him in a fireball)
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Blizzard Bash! (He charges at her in an iceball)
(The two fighters collide and try to push each other back, but when push comes to shove, Doug is stronger and he overpowers Wendy, knocking her to the ground. Doug gets back on his feet and walks over to Wendy, and picks her up by her sides)
Doug/Cerulean Viper: You won't be a thorn in Marlowe's side anymore. I doubt that I can freeze you on account of those fiery gloves you have, but I can always improvise.
Sam/Sir Justice: (Looks over at the two) Wendy…Mr. Testaburger, please stop!
(Doug doesn't listen as he just keeps staring up at his daughter unsure of what to do with her)
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: (Looks down at Doug with sorrow on her face) Please…find it in your heart who you really are. You're not some plaything that Marlowe can use. You're a hero, an upstanding member of the South Park Saints, and above all else, you're my father.
Doug/Cerulean Viper: (Blinks a few times as it something is finally getting through to him) W-Wendy….no….enemy!
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: (Begins to tear up) Daddy, please listen to me. Remember who you are…remember who we are: Your friends, your family.
Doug/Cerulean Viper: F-Friends….F-Family…
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: At least remember me…please…
(A tear falls from Wendy's eye and it lands on Doug's forehead. Doug gasps as if he's remembering something. He then gets hoards of memories. These memories include: Wendy's birth, Wendy's first day of school, A family vacation to Disney World, Doug first meeting Sam, Doug holding Wendy in his arms after Justin hit her, Doug teaching Sam how to play darts, The Saints' victory in the graveyard, Wendy's Sweet 16 party, and Doug on Death T.V fighting against Paris Hilton)
Doug/Cerulean Viper: (Gets life back in his eyes. He's back to normal) Wendy? (He lowers Wendy down and puts her back on the ground)
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: (Smiles) Hi dad. (She and Doug hug)
Sam/Sir Justice: (Laughs with joy, happy that Doug is back)
Craig/DJ C-Rage: Phew! Glad that nightmare's over.
Alex Slave/Glamorous Gardener: Call me crazy for saying this, but I think all it took for Doug to go back to his old self was love. The kind of love that only a daughter can give.
Tweek/Peppy Prince: Yeah…
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: I missed you, dad.
Doug/Cerulean Viper: It's okay, I'm here now. I don't know what happened, but if I did anything to hurt you all, I'm sorry.
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: Well you did freeze me, Sam, and Mr. Slave's chainsaw.
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: I'll defrost you all right now. (All Wendy does is place her warm gloves on the ice, and that causes it to melt)
Doug/Cerulean Viper: So, last I remember I was at Tweek Bros. Coffeehouse with Marlowe, but then everything gets foggy after that.
Sam/Sir Justice: Well get ready for this when I tell you that Ms. Marlowe brainwashed you. She apparently used some kind of pill.
Doug/Cerulean Viper: That would explain why I felt weird after I finished my coffee! Marlowe must have drugged it! I don't understand. I thought she was nicer than that.
Cartman/Coon: Yeah, well she's not! We need to track her down and teach her a lesson!
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: We've sent Cody, Sophocles, Bebe, Mr. Stevens, Kevin, and Leon after her. She said something about making an escape.
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Then let's go find her! She couldn't have gotten far!
(With Doug back on the team, the eight saints leave the inner sanctum and leave in the direction Marlowe ran off to. They make it to one of the hallways, and it's at this moment they see Cody, Bebe, Sophocles, Jeffrey, Leon, and Kevin, with his rabbit DNA now worn off, laying on the floor beaten up)
Sam/Sir Justice: Oh no! (Sam and his group run up to the group of six) Are you guys alright?!
Leon/Beo-Wolf: Augh. We tried…to stop her. But she was too strong.
Cody/Mr. Gentleman: That old hag is a lot tougher than she looks.
Bebe/Sharp Edge Stevens: I can't believe we lost to an old lady. I feel very inadequate.
Sam/Sir Justice: I'm just glad you guys are okay.
(Suddenly, they hear footsteps)
Jeffrey/Sgt. Stevens: Someone is coming! Get ready to fight everyone! (He as well as everyone else in his group get up and get ready to fight)
(The footsteps are coming from Ursula who finally finds our heroes)
Ursula/Samurai of Light: Thank goodness you guys are okay.
Sam/Sir Justice: Ursula!
Ursula/Samurai of Light: Hey, Sam! (She sees Doug) I see that Mr. Testaburger is okay.
Sam/Sir Justice: Yeah, Marlowe brainwashed him, but he's fine now. What are you doing here?
Ursula/Samurai of Light: Red and I were sent in here as backup. But we found Kelly instead.
Sam/Sir Justice: What?! Kelly is here?
Ursula/Samurai of Light: Yeah. I told Red to escort her out of here
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Red is here too?
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Yes, dad, all of the Saints are here. They're all fighting outside.
Maria/White Mind Maiden: Hello, can you all hear me? What's the status report?
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: Maria?! We got Mr. Testaburger back! Now we're trying to go after Marlowe!
Maria/White Mind Maiden: Well I just saw a figure wearing a silver dress and carrying a silver parasol walk out onto the roof.
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Yup, that's Marlowe.
Sam/Sir Justice: Marlowe is up on the roof, eh? Then that's where we'll go!
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: I do remember seeing a helipad on the roof. Marlowe is probably waiting for a helicopter as a means of escape! We've got to stop her!
Cody/Mr. Gentleman: When Marlowe ran off after she beat us, I heard the sound of an elevator down the hall. I bet that elevator takes you right to the roof.
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Okay, let's do it! Wendy, Sam, you two are coming with me. We're taking Marlowe on together!
Tweek/Peppy Prince: Hey, what about us?
Doug/Cerulean Viper: You guys head back outside and see if the rest of the team needs you. The three of us will be fine on our own.
Sophocles: Alright, good luck, but be careful!
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: (Uses his powers to get in contact with Maria) Maria, if you see anyone like Clyde, Kyle, Butters, or Annie, tell them to be on the lookout for a helicopter, and when they see it, do whatever it takes to get rid of it!
Maria/White Mind Maiden: Roger that!
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: Good luck you guys, we're all counting on you. Like I said, even though we're all far from being friends, nothing would make me happier than to see another one of these advocates bite the dust. So go kick some ass!
Sam/Sir Justice: Can do, Apollo! Let's go you two! (With that, Sam, Wendy, and Doug run down the hall to find the elevator)
(Outside on the helipad, Marlowe is waiting for a helicopter to come)
Marlowe: Where the hell is Lenny? If I have to wait another minute, I might just have to find a new pilot.
(Suddenly she hears the elevator door open behind her and when it opens…)
Sam/Sir Justice: Falcon's Blast!
(Marlowe dodges out of the way of Sam's attack. Sam, Doug, and Wendy walk out of the elevator)
Sam/Sir Justice: It's the end of the road, Marlowe, surrender!
(It's at this moment when the helicopter finally arrives. It gets ready to land)
Marlowe: So sorry, but I think my ride is here.
Kyle/Human Kite: Sorry, but I think that ride's for us! (He, Clyde, Annie, and Butters appear out of nowhere) Destroy that helicopter! 1,000 Degree Stare!
Annie/Darling Dame: Butterfly Maelstrom!
Butters/Professor Chaos: Electro Ball!
Clyde/Mosquito: Mosquito Mob: Lazer League.
(The four attacks hit he helicopter and it explodes. Lenny, the pilot, jumps out of the helicopter before it does though)
Marlowe: I'll put you four in your place! (She takes out a pistol) Wind Pistol!
(She fires a strong gust of wind at the four saints, but the dodge out of the way)
Butters/Professor Chaos: Sam, Wendy, Mr. Testaburger, we took care of the helicopter like Maria said we should. Now take out Marlowe! (Butters and the three saints that helped him fly back to ground level)
Sam/Sir Justice: You know we will!
Marlowe: I guess there is no escaping you insolent fools. (Looks over at Doug) And looking over at Douglas, I'd say that you managed to revert him back to normal.
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: That's right.
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Why'd you do it?
Marlowe: So I could invade New Orleans and harvest the citizens blood, of course.
Doug/Cerulean Viper: I don't care about that. I want to know why you've been doing all of these evil things!
Marlowe: Okay, I'll tell you. By now I'm sure you all know that I'm the fifth advocate and why I became one, let me explain…
(Flashback time)
(Flashback #1: Marlowe appears to be much younger and she's working in an elementary school as a teacher's aide)
Marlowe (v.o): A long time ago, there was a young 20-something year old teacher's aide. Let's call her…Penelope Marlowe. It was her dream to be a real teacher with a classroom of her own. She knew she was smart enough to be a teacher. But for whatever reason, her bosses thought she was perfect as a teacher's aide.
(Flashback #2: Marlowe is at her house, not at Grand Isle, but rather a normal suburban home, just laying down and looking up at the ceiling. She says something to herself and Satan appears)
Marlowe (v.o): One night though, everything changed. I simply said something along the lines of, "I'd sell my soul to be a teacher." Upon saying that a big red man with horns appeared to me: It was Satan. He told me that he'd make me the best teacher in Colorado, all I had to do was return a favor when, or if, the time came.
Sam/Sir Justice (v.o): I imagine that favor is the blood harvest?
Marlowe (v.o): Precisely.
(Flashback #3: Marlowe is in her own classroom and we see her over the years at Fort Collins High School, teaching a bunch of students literature, one of which is a teenage version of Doug)
Marlowe (v.o): 40 years have passed, and life was good. Nothing brought me more joy than teaching my students about the importance of literature.
(Flashback #4: Marlowe is looking into the bathroom mirror of her home because she's getting a call from Satan. His astral projection is in the mirror. Her wind pistol and parasol magically appear in the bathroom when Satan snaps his fingers)
Marlowe (v.o): But then one day, sometime eight years ago, I got a call from Satan. He said that his son Damien was imprisoned by you lot, and he needed me to harvest the blood to revive him. It was also at this time he gave me my parasol and wind pistol. But I needed more than just that if I wanted to revive Damien.
(Flashback #5: Marlowe is holding auditions for members of her army in the backyard of her home)
Marlowe (v.o): I had to hire an army to do my dirty work. I told them that I'd take care of them and feed them, house them, clothe them, in exchange for their undying loyalty.
(Flashback #6: Grand Isle is a populated area with a bunch of citizens walking around. But them Marlowe and her army came to threw them all out)
Marlowe (v.o): I then needed a home base where I could formulate my plans. And Grand Isle seemed to be the perfect place. So me and my army went over there and ran those fools out! We did whatever we had to, blow up a few buildings, shoot and kill a few people, but we ran them all out of the island and they never came back. The island was our now!
(Flashback #7: From there, Marlowe and her army are using any scrap metal they find to build the vans, helicopters, planes, and tanks. We then see Marlowe standing in her new mansion's inner sanctum)
Marlowe (v.o): There was a lot of scrap metal leftover from our raid, so we decided to build countless vehicles and weapons with it. So that's my story. I decided to reside here on this island for the rest of my days, and retired from my job as teacher so I could dedicate the rest of my life towards reviving Damien.
(Back to reality)
Marlowe: And I almost succeeded in my plans too! But then you all had to come along, revert Douglas back to normal, and take out a good portion of my army.
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: So you're telling us that you ran a bunch of innocent people out of this island all for the sake of your plan. How callous can you get?
Marlowe: My intentions were pure, child.
Sam/Sir Justice: Yeah, pure evil!
Marlowe: Enough of this prattle, it's at this moment where I'd like to end your lives. Your blood will make great sustenance for Damien.
(Cue All My Life from Gran Turismo 6)
Doug/Cerulean Viper: We won't let you get away with what you've done, Ms. Marlowe. I used to respect you when I was a teenager, but now that respect is replaced with an undying rage. You'll pay for what you've done!
Marlowe: Let's see what you, your daughter, and her boyfriend have in store.
Sam/Sir Justice: What do we have in store? Why, the same thing we serve all of the other villains: A nice plate of whoop-ass pie with a side of bruised cream! Hope you're hungry!
Marlowe: Bring it on!
(Walk for a thousand miles down this road. I don't know what's taken me. I feel I must carry on so that I can justify my everything)
Sam/Sir Justice: Cody's Speed Boots, activate! (He runs up quickly to Marlowe) Justice Jump Kick! (He kicks her with such force that it sends her flying a few feet)
Marlowe: Such zest, such bravado!
Sam/Sir Justice: (Takes out his lightsaber) Red's Blade!
(As Sam swings his lightsaber, Marlowe blocks it with her parasol and pushes him back)
Sam/Sir Justice: Whoa, what's that umbrella made of, adamantium?
Marlowe: Parasol Sniper! (She fires a blast of energy from the top of her parasol)
Sam/Sir Justice: (Blocks the attack with his wrist mounted shield. He's about to lower it when Marlowe comes charging at him fast)
Marlowe: Umbrella Whack!
(Past is what, past is what will be pass you. Be alright, be alright, cause I'll be me. Cause I know, cause I know that I'll prove myself. In the end I will be standing here)
(Marlowe and Sam are in a struggle, trying to push one another back)
Sam/Sir Justice: Back off! You and your superpowered umbrella!
Marlowe: Give it up, boy!
(Suddenly, Doug and Wendy jump over Sam and get ready for their special attack)
Doug/Cerulean Viper & Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Father-Daughter Combo!
(They both hit Marlowe in the face with icy and fiery punches and she goes flying back)
Marlowe: So I guess my pill wore off after all, eh, Douglas?
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Never underestimate the love a daughter has for her father!
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: It's that same love that will crush you, Marlowe!
(Doug and Wendy's gloves engulf them in cold winds and flames respectively)
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Inferno Tackle!
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Blizzard Bash!
(They come at Marlowe, but…)
Marlowe: (Opens her parasol) Going up! (She flies up in the air, causing the attack to miss)
Sam/Sir Justice: No way! She can fly!?
(All my life, I've lived so wrong. This is a path I have to take. Can't go back to who I was. This is my time to break away)
Marlowe: I'd love to see how well you fair while I'm in the air.
Sam/Sir Justice: Let me show you! (He opens his wingpack and flies up after her)
Marlowe: (Takes out her pistol) Wind Pistol! (Fires a strong gust of wind and it hits Sam, causing him to come crashing back to the roof)
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Are you alright, Sam?
Sam/Sir Justice: I'm fine, just focus on Marlowe!
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress & Doug/Cerulean Viper: Alright!
Sam/Sir Justice: Falcon's Blast! (Fires his attack upwards)
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Wrath of the Tigress! (Fires a fire ball)
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Viper's Cold Reception! (Fires an icy blast)
Marlowe: (Closes her umbrella for a bit and waves it) Glorious Gust!
(Upon waving her umbrella, the three attacks get sent back and hit our three heroes. Marlowe quickly opens her umbrella back up and continues to float in the air)
(Instrumentals)
(Our three heroes get back up)
Sam/Sir Justice: I can see why those other guys had trouble with this old hag!
Marlowe: (Takes out her pistol and prepares to finish her opponents off) Well this is the end. It's been fun, but nothing last forever. But don't worry, a part of you three will still live on…inside Damien's circulatory system! Say goodbye!
(Suddenly Apollo teleports behind Marlowe)
Sam/Sir Justice: (Sees Apollo) Actually, why don't you say hello to our newest member? (Points behind her)
(Past is what, past is what will be pass you. Be alright, be alright, cause I'll be me. Cause I know, cause I know that I'll prove myself. In the end I will be standing here)
Marlowe: (Turns to see Apollo) What is this?!
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: I'm the new saint in town, the Psychotic Plague! Now get ready, because this will only hurt a lot! (He uses psychic energy to create a giant fist made of blue energy) Take this, Scary Poppins!Psychotic Knuckle!
(He hits Marlowe hard and sends her flying back down to the roof)
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: She's all yours, you three! Go to town on her!
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Thanks, Apollo, we owe you one!
Sam/Sir Justice: Let's finish this old windbag off! (Turns to Wendy) Come along, darling.
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Got it!
(All my life, I've lived so wrong. This is a path I have to take. Can't go back to who I was. This is my time to break away)
(The two saints run up to Marlowe)
Sam/Sir Justice: Fist of Millie!
Wendy/Fuchsia Tigress: Flaming Knuckle!
(The two Saints get ready to punch Marlowe, but she uses her umbrella to block the attack. Wendy and Sam are too strong though and they push Marlowe back. She gets back up and aims her now closed parasol at our heroes)
Marlowe: Enough! This ends now! (She begins charging up her Parasol Sniper attack)
Doug/Cerulean Viper: (Steps up) Yes…Yes it does! (His gloves start to emit cold temperatures and Marlowe gets nervous) Viper's Cold Reception!
(Just break away from who I was! Just break away…from who I was)
(Doug fires the attack and it hits Marlowe. Once the attack ceases, Marlowe is shown to be frozen from the neck down, unable to move)
(End song)
Marlowe: (Shivering) C-Curse you, D-Douglas! I-I-I will g-get my r-r-revenge!
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Yeah, we'll see about that.
Sam/Sir Justice: (Looks up at Apollo, who is still floating in the air using his powers) Thanks for the help Apollo.
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: Hey, you guys are my new teammates. It's the least I can do. Just don't get used to it, and also, this doesn't mean we're friends yet.
Sam/Sir Justice: Are we getting close to the friend level?
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: (Sigh) Yes.
Sam/Sir Justice: Awesome sauce! (Turns to Marlowe) So what should we do with her?
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: Well, Marlowe's defenses thinned out quite a bit, by which I mean they ran away like a bunch of bitches. So Cody is calling New Orleans Police Department as we speak so they can try and arrest these guys. No doubt they'll find Marlowe up here too. So I'd leave her. She doesn't look like she's going anywhere anytime soon.
Sam/Sir Justice: Oh, true that!
Apollo/Psychotic Plague: Cody also said he called his pilot, Bernard, so he can fly us all back to South Park. So get your asses down here! Our job is done!
Sam/Sir Justice: At long last. And we still have enough time to celebrate your birthday, Mr. Testaburger.
Doug/Cerulean Viper: Then let's get home! After all I've been through, I could go for some birthday cake and rocky road ice cream.
Marlowe: D-D-Don't mention i-i-ice in front of m-me!
(Doug, Wendy, Sam, and Apollo laugh as they head back to ground level)
(We cut to a few moments later when the New Orleans Police Department are arresting Marlowe, and a good amount of her underlings. There were quite a few that managed to get away, whether by helicopter or boat. Our heroes, now in their normal clothes, are leaving on Cody's private jet, looking at the island as the police take control, and as Marlowe's minions frantically escape)
Cody: (Looking out of the plane window) That's another advocate out of the way. Only three to go.
(Later in the flight, everyone is relaxing after the fight the exciting day they had. We cut to Doug, Sam, and Wendy, who is asleep with her head resting on her father's lap)
Doug: (Stroking his daughter's hair) Wendy must be tired.
Sam: I don't blame her. We've all had a long day today. Probably the biggest mission we've had up to this point. (Looks at Wendy) She worried a lot about you.
Doug: I can only imagine.
Sam: We were all worried about you, Mr. Testaburger. You're a good man, and if we didn't stop Marlowe…I don't even want to imagine what would happen.
Doug: Well you can rest easy knowing that I'm fine…son.
Sam: Did you just call me your son?
Doug: Like I said, I view you as one of my own. You really are like a second child to me. The way you and my daughter bonded over the years, the way you care enough about me to come all the way out to some island off the coast of Louisiana just to save me. I feel like these are the kind of things a son would do.
Sam: Thanks, Mr. Testaburger. I know you'd do the same for me.
Doug: I certainly would. And please, call me Doug.
Sam: Sure thing…Doug.
Doug: (Holds out his hand) You're a noble man, Samuel. Keep up the good work.
Sam: (Shakes Doug's hand) Thank you, Doug. You're a pretty cool guy yourself. (They release the handshake and Sam calls to Cody) Hey, Cody, do you have a sound system on this plane?
Cody: Why yes I do.
Sam: (Takes out a CD from his pocket) You think you can play this?
Cody: I don't see why not. (He takes the CD and puts it in a stereo system, and music comes out)
(Cue Father and Son by Cat Stevens)
Doug: Oh my gosh, I love this song!
Sam: Glad to know. I was planning on singing this just for you at your birthday, today.
Doug: You're a cool guy, Sam, don't ever change.
Sam: (Smiles) Thanks, Doug.
(It's not time to make a change. Just relax, take it easy. You're still young, that's your fault. There's o much you have to know. Find a girl, settle down. If you want you can marry. Look at me, I'm old, but I'm happy)
(Cut to Cartman, Kyle, Stan, Kenny, and Butters. Cartman is getting a little emotional listening to this song)
Cartman: (Walks up to his four friends) Hey, you guys remember when I served Scott Tenorman chili with his parents in it?
Kyle: Yeah. That was a new low.
Cartman: Well, when I learned that Jack Tenorman, Scott's father, was also my father, I couldn't help but feel a bit of remorse and regret.
Kenny: (Sarcastically) Cartman feeling remorse for his past actions!? The world must be ending.
Cartman: (Ignoring that comment) Not a day goes by when I wonder what I would've been like if I had someone like Jack as a father. And it got me thinking how lucky you four are to have fathers in your life. So, just do me a favor and when you see your fathers later…just hug them and tell them you love them. Hug them and never let them go.
(His four friends are shocked to see a sentimental side to Cartman)
Stan: Uh…okay, Cartman. We'll do that.
Cartman: I'm serious. You don't know what you four have until it's gone.
Butters: Sure, Eric, we'll hug our dads. We'll do it for you.
(I was once like you are now, and I know it's not easy to be calm when you've found something going on. But take your time, think a lot. Why, think of everything you've got. For you will still be here tomorrow, but your dreams may not)
(Cut to Bebe and Jeffrey. She sees that Jeffrey is trying to fight back tears)
Bebe: Daddy, are you crying?
Jeffrey: Sorry, sweetie, I just get a little emotional whenever I hear this song. Makes me think of me and my father. He was such a good man, always taught me the right lessons, and always showed kindness. He died a few days before we learned your mother was pregnant with you. Not a day goes by where I wish he was by my side again.
Bebe: Grandpa sounds like a great man.
Jeffrey: He was. And you know what, call me crazy, but I like to think that a part of him lives on in you. I mean, you both have similar personalities, nice but a bit feisty when necessary, always socializing, always knew how to liven a party up.
Bebe: And of course, there's the sheer coincidence of when you learned that you were having me and when grandpa died at almost the same period of time.
Jeffrey: That's right. Come here. (He hugs her warmly) I love you, Bebe. You're the greatest accomplishment that I've ever achieved.
Bebe: Thanks daddy. I love you too.
(How can I try to explain. Cause when I do he turns away again. It's always been the same, same old story. From the moment I could talk I was ordered to listen. Now there's a way and I know that I have to go away. I know I have to go)
(Cut to Kurt and Annie who are just sitting, Kurt lost in thought)
Kurt: Hey, Annie.
Annie: (Turns to face her boyfriend) Hmm…
Kurt: I want to tell you something that I've only told Sam, Bridgette, Justin, and Ursula. It's about my father.
Annie: What about him?
Kurt: I never really knew him that well. That's because, well, he smoked like a chimney. He ended up getting lung cancer. He died of it when I was only four years old.
Annie: I see…
Kurt: Since I was too young to understand the concept of death, my mother and paternal grandparents told me that my dad went on a vacation somewhere. When I asked where, they just said a beautiful hotel beyond the clouds. I didn't know what they meant, but fourteen years later…I definitely know what they're talking about. I never had a father most of my life.
Annie: (Holds Kurt's hand) I'm so sorry, Kurty.
Kurt: Don't fret for me, dear. (Begins to tear up) It's just that…listening to this song…it…it…
Annie: Kurt…
Kurt: (Begins to bawl) It makes me miss my daddy!
(Kurt cries on Annie's shoulder and she holds him warmly)
(Instrumental)
(Cut to Cody, who gets a little emotional as well listening to the song)
Cody: (Gets up from his seat) I'm going to call my dad. Let him know how much I love him. He should be home from work by now.
Heidi: You think you can give the phone to me after that. I want to call my father too.
Cody: Anyone else want to call their father?
Tweek: (Nods his head)
Craig: Yeah, what the heck.
Kelly: Count me in.
Millie: Me too.
Bridgette & Clyde: Sure.
Kevin: My dad gave so much to me, it's about time I give back by telling him how much he means to me.
(Heidi, Craig, Tweek, Kelly, Bridgette, Kevin, Millie, and Clyde follow Cody to the plane's personal phone)
(We cut to Red and Ursula. Ursula sees that Red is depressed)
Ursula: What's wrong, Red Delicious? We beat Marlowe, why do you look so sad?
Red: I just got to thinking about my dad. I remember when I was younger, he said that I'll always be his little girl, and he'll always love me…but then I came out of the closet and he just wants nothing to do with me. I'm not going to lie, it hurts. You're very lucky that your parents are very accepting as to who you are.
Ursula: Oh, Red. (Holds her) I know it hurts, but if they don't accept you for who you are, fuck them. They don't understand what we have together. You don't need people like them in your life.
Red: I get the gist of what you're saying. If they can't accept me for who I am, then it's their loss, but it still hurts knowing that your own parents don't love you just because of your sexuality.
Ursula: Red…
Red: Not trying to sound rude, but can you stop talking and just hold me?
Ursula: (Holds her warmly and rubs her back) Sure…
(It's not time to make a change. Just sit down, take it slowly. You're still young, that's your fault. There's so much you have to go through. Find a girl, settle down. If you want, you can marry. Look at me, I am old, but I'm happy)
(Cut to Apollo and Maria)
Apollo: I don't know, sister. Throughout all of the lives I've lived, I always believed that friends and happiness were a weakness. But being around you and these saints…it makes me feel something deep inside.
Maria: How does it feel.
Apollo: Weird. Almost…a euphoric feeling.
Maria: That's happiness. Once you get a taste, you can't stop.
Apollo: I want more of this feeling…but I still want to believe the words father told me.
Maria: Parents aren't always right you know. Why don't you do what your heart tells you, Apollo.
Apollo: Right now it's telling me to do more of this. More battling alongside you. I want to hang out with you all.
Maria: If that's what the heart wants, do it!
Apollo: (Thinks for a bit and smiles warmly) Yeah. Today, a new Apollo Murciélago is born! I shall be…good!
Maria: (Hugs him) That's the spirit brother!
(All the times that I cried. Keeping all the things I knew inside. It's hard, but it's harder to ignore it. If they were right, I'd agree. But it's them they know not me. Now there's a way and I know that I have to go away. I know I have to go)
(Cut back to Sam, Wendy, and Doug)
Wendy: (Wakes up and sits back up in her chair)
Sam: Well look who's finally up! Sleep well?
Wendy: (Kisses Sam on the cheek) I did. (Turns to Doug and hugs him) I love you, dad.
Doug: I love you to Wendy. And thanks for saving me.
Wendy: (A small tear of joy falls from her eye) No problem.
(The plane flies off into the sunset as the episode ends)
TO BE CONTINUED…
(Credits theme: Bakusou Yume Uta from Soul Eater)
(Yotei chouwa wo kechirasu noizu iru youni katto niramu gankou. Shinobikonda gareeji de yumemiteta ano koro to kawaranu haato. Sou kyou to onaji ashita nante konee ze ore binkan ni bakusou. Utau shinzou kanaderu biito ikiteiru tashikana akashi wo.)
(Shot #1: Everyone is back at the Testaburger Residence, singing "Happy Birthday" to Doug. He blows out his candles, and his wife, Deborah , begins to cut the cake)
(Te ni shite ha ushinatte te ni shite ha ushinatte. Utsurou toki no naka de hito shirezu namida shita yoru ha koko ni atte subete ga tada jibun de. Sousa mada ikeru hazu daro)
(Shot #2: In a forest somewhere, a strange looking venus fly trap plant is growing. A shadow of a person is looming over it)
(Kegarenaki hikari ga yamiyo wo tsuranuite
Kono toki ga towa da to ima inochi ga sakenderu
Hora kokoro no oku ni itsumo kimi ga utsuru yo
Mamorubeki shinjitsu wo tada daiteyukunda
Riyuu nantenai sa furueru tamashii yo aa)
(Shot #3: Apollo is walking down the hall in school, but he passes Jason and Bradley who spit spitballs at the back of his head. Jason and Bradley laugh, but instead of getting angry and using his powers, Apollo just waves his hand in disapproval and walks away. He really has turned a new leaf)
(Koukai ha nai nante daitai uso sa tsuba to basu shadou
Ukeirero sono bun tsuyoku nareba ii sa karamawatte mou ichido
Sou kyou no jibun wo gomakaseru hodo kiyou janee kizuku to
Ima omou kanjiteru kitto kotae nante arya shinai kedo)
(Shot #4: Marlowe, now thawed out, is in the high security prison with the other villains. Justin tries messing with her, but Marlowe just kicks Justin in the balls and he doubles over in pain. Trent, Ethel, Max, Tobias, and Paris laugh while Charon tries to help Justin up on his feet. Charon then escorts Justin to the infirmary. We also get another shot of Dimitri, still in the prison's freezer)
(Deatte ha wakarete deatte ha tsunagatte
Yorisou seishun no kirameki yo taai nai hibi de sae mo
Subete ha koko ni atte subete ga utsukushikute
Demo mada tatakatteru kara)
(Shot #5: Sam is invited over to the Testaburger Residence again for dinner. They're having some burgers that Doug grilled up. As they are eating though, Kelly is looking through the window, glaring at Wendy)
(Kurikaesu mainichi no aranami ni nomaretemo
Mada yume kara samenu oretachi ha koko ni iru
Itsumo kikoetekuru nakamatachi no koe ga
Kodoku wo furiharau youni tokai no kaze no naka
Tada iku shikanai sa shinjita ikiyou wo aa)
(Shot #6: On board a Sam's club truck, we see a bunch of crates that contain tons of the venus fly trap esque plants. The crates have the word, "Thorne Co." written on them)
(Samayoinagara
Nanika wo kaeteiku tameni kawaru yuuki wo
Soshite nakushichainai nanimo kawarazu ni iru tsuyosa wo)
(Shot #7: Apollo is over at Stan's house, and he and Stan play some video games together. Stan is happy that Apollo is coming out of his shell)
(Kegarenaki hikari ga yamiyo wo tsuranuite
Kono shunkan ga eien da to ima inochi ga sakenderu
Hora kokoro no oku ni itsumo kimi ga utsuru yo
Mamorubeki shinjitsu wo tada daiteyuke)
(Shot #8: The horde of henchmen that escaped from Grand Isle are now in a desert somewhere. They don't know where to go, but they all take off in one direction, hoping to find the Saints so they can get their revenge)
(Kurikaesu mainichi no kouha ni nomaretemo
Mada yume kara samenu oretachi ha koko ni iru
Itsumo kikoetekuru nakamatachi no koe ga
Kodoku wo furiharau youni machi no kaze no naka
Tada iku shikanai sa shinjita ikizama wo aa
Riyuu nantenai sa furueru tamashii yo aa)
(Shot #9: At the school cafeteria, Apollo is eating lunch with Sam, Maria, and their friends. He appears to be very happy. He raises his soda can as does everyone else)