Scarred Chapter 3

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After Seung-Hyun drove through the YG plains carpark he made a quite U bolt for the exit, there was no need to get out of the car because Ji's Lamborghini was not parked there. Mentally kicking himself for wasting so much time, it'll still take at least 20 minutes to get to his leaders house and by now he was sick with worry, and panic was wreaking havoc. He had to take a deep breath to steady himself.

Speeding down the highway towards Jiyong's house, Seung-Hyun decided to quickly make some calls to the other members, something told him that they would want to know how close he was to finding him, dragging out his phone from his pocket he quick dialled Daesung knowing he'd be able to keep a cool head about everything, but he needed to make it quick as he was only 10 minutes from the leaders house.

…."Hello?"
"Dae somethings wrong, I can feel it. Im on my way to Jiyong's house right now, I'm only a few minutes away. "
"Hyung.. what should we do? Do you want us to meet you there?"

Seung-Hyun was silent for a moment while processing Daesung's question, what did he want them to do?

"yeah. Get the others and come to Ji's place, if anything changes ill call you"

That was pretty much all the elder could come up with, he had forgotten why he even called but his heart was racing and he felt ill. "dammit Ji what have you done"

…."Hyung? are you there?" came from Daesung on the phone. Didn't Seung-Hyun realise he had forgotten to hang up?

"Yes Dae I'm here.. and I'm almost at Jiyongs house. Dae im scared something bad has happened.. I love him.."

…. The words were out before he could stop them; he had told Daesung that he loved their leader, but why? Did he?.. he thought about it for mere seconds before he realised the truth that, yes he did.

Daesung waited before simply replying

"we know hyung"

Seung-Hyun let out a breath he didn't even know he was holding in and for a split second he felt lighter, and his head was clearer. Then his short drive was over and he was pulling up to the leaders house.

"Dae. I'm here I gotta go find him! Ill see you soon!"

He didn't even wait for a reply and hung up, something definitely wasn't right, he drove straight into Jiyongs yard, the gates were open and upon closer inspection and to Seung-Hyun's distaste, his garage door was open too. That was not normal and he knew it! The leader would never leave his pride and joy so open and exposed to the elements or his gates open to the public or any creep for that matter.

At this point he knew that the leader was here but that something was seriously wrong, he knew at that moment he had to be quick, he slammed on his brakes and shot out of his luxury car and ran towards the garage.

Once inside the house the Big Bang rapper took barely a single second to take in his surroundings, the house smelled like his Ji. 'my Ji' he thought, his revelation was not a shocking this time but sure enough he could recognize Jiyong by scent anywhere and he was beginning to feel lost in his toxicity simply standing there smelling his loved one.

Snapping himself out of it Seung-Hyun started his search for the Big Bang leader, running through the first floor of the house his movements became more frantic as he realised he wasn't there. Finding his way back to the middle of the house he sprinted up the stairs looking for Ji, bolting straight to pop stars bedroom he busted through the door and felt a wave of relief as he stepped in and could hear the shower running through bathroom door the door.

Wanting to sink to the floor and wait for the leader and not intrude in his privacy, the older male decided to go and knock on the door and make his presence known.

Knock knock

"Ji its Seung-Hyun, I came here because were all worried about you"

….. silence

knock knock knock

"Jijong?!"

He waited for a reply nervously for what seemed like an eternity before deciding to just walk in, it wouldn't be a big deal, they're both men and they've seen each other before. all those times in the YG gym change rooms, so right now wouldn't be a big deal.

Taking a steady breath the rapper opened the door, only to be greeted by a wall of steam at first, trying to look around for the younger man. As the steam disappeared Seung-Hyun's heart fell into his stomach, he couldn't see the man at first but he could see the bright red blood that had spilled everywhere near the shower, the glowing life essence that he knew was his beloved.

In two quick strides he was standing in the shower looming over Jiyong, fighting the shock that coursed through his body and straining to see through the steam and tears. The sight was horrific, Ji, his Ji, lying lifeless and bleeding and exposed. His adrenaline kicked and he quickly lifted the man out of the running shower and moved him to the floor in the bathroom, making short work of removing his shirt he quickly tied it tightly around Jiyong's arm.

Taking the younger man's right wrist he desperately attempted to find a pulse, but it was so difficult in the panic, he was shaking and it was hard to find the right grip on his slippery love. Finding a pulse, it was hardly there and Seung-Hyun thought in his adrenalin fuelled blitz that he had imagined it, but he took it and ran with that hope. Keeping pressure on the pop stars arm he fished out his phone and dialled triple zero (emergency response number in Australia).

The call to the operator was quick as he basically yelled that he needed an ambulance and he need one right now! Now pissed that the ambulance would be about 5 minutes, he was worried that Ji wouldn't make it that long. He now had one hand on the man's wrist and the other was searching for a towel to put under Jiyong's head.

Making sure he could still feel that slight pulse, he even held his breath to make sure he could then quick dialled Daesung again

…."Hyung we're almost there!..."

"No Dae! We'll be at the hospital in minutes, the ambulance is on its way! Go there! Dae, its bad"

The rapper chocked out that last part to the Big Bang vocalist

"Hyung what the fuck…?!"

"just go to the hospital! I have to go the paramedics are here!"

And with that he hung up, dropping his phone on the tiles and shooting look at the paramedics that pleaded for them to save him. It was all a blur as they scurried around quickly trying to bring life back to the still man, not bothering to remove Seung-Hyun's shirt from Jiyongs arms they too searched for a pulse while attaching him to various machines that would attempt to keep him alive.

The rapper had crawled back and had his back against the cupboard under the sick, knees up and tears running down his cheeks while he watched the medical professionals do their job. Barely audible he kept whispering for them to save him over and over, basically a silent plea, he was not a religious man but be prayed to whatever god might exist to keep the young man here by his side.

In his daze he hadn't realized that they had moved Jiyong to a stretcher and were about to take him away, panicked he looked up at them questioningly

"he's still with us but we have to take him to hospital immediately, will you be riding with us in the ambulance sir?"

… "no, just go quickly! I'll be there soon!.. There are people there waiting already"

Seung-Hyun felt a part of his heart leave with his love as the paramedics took him away, he had so desperately wanted to go with him but two reasons stopped him, 1. Because he needed to clean up the blood in Jiyongs bathroom, the younger man did not need to see this if, no, when he recovered. And 2. Seung-Hyun could not bare to be there if Ji lost his life, if he had to witness that, he didn't think be able to live so he put all of his trust into the hands of those professionals. He would make life hell for those who didn't focus all their attention on saving the man.

Still shaking the man got up from the floor and turned off the shower, Ji's blood loss wouldn't have been so bad if this water hadn't have been so hot. Looking around he found towels, that'll have to do he thought as he started to clean up the mess. It did not take long for there to be no trace of blood left in the bathroom, he had taken the towels out to the laundry already and was simply giving the large bathroom a once over quickly before he left, and that's when he noticed it, the blade that his beloved had used to try and take his own life. Glimmering at the base of the shower was the cut throat razor; he stared at it feeling his rage almost boil over before picking it up and putting it in his pocket. He didn't know why he took it but he did and now it was time, time to find out if he still had the will to live, to find out if the one and only GDragon has survived.

Looking town at his watch only 15 minutes had passed, Ji would be at the hospital now and now he had to make the journey there too. Taking his phone off of the floor and pocketing that too the older male ran outside towards his car, while leaving he made sure to close all doors and lock the leaders house, it would not do well to have the property ransacked while the owner recovered. Exiting the large gates and making sure they closed behind him, Seung-Hyun planted it towards the hospital at a dangerous speed. He hoped he did not get pulled over by the police and lady luck was on his side because in less the 6 minutes he was parked outside the hospital attempting to gather his wits and courage to go and see the young man.

At the hospital

The automatic doors that were at the hospital entrance would not open fast enough for Seung-Hyun's liking as he jittered on the balls of his feet waiting for them, once inside he practically ran to the counter demanding to see Jiyong.

"beg pardon sir? Who exactly are you looking for?"

As he was about to yell at the poor lady behind the desk he heard a familiar voice ringing from beside him somewhere.

"Hyung! You're finally here! What took you so long?!"

It was Daesung, and closely behind him was Youngbae and Big Bang maknae Seungri, quick glances behind Daesung showed him that all 3 had been crying, his heart sank, 'fuck! Did I make it in time? Is he still with us?!' was all he could think when the very same voice chimed in and broke his heavy thoughts

"Hyung… they took him.."

"where? Where is Jiyong?!"

…"sir"

This time it was a randoms voice that had interrupted

"My name is Doctor Taliah, and you all must be Jiyong's band mates. I'd like for you all to follow me please I have some information about our patient I assume you all would like to hear."

Turning on her heels the doctor walked away, followed very, very closely by the 4 men. She led them through some long hallways and up 2 floors and into a waiting room. It smelled sterile in here the oldest member thought but it was over shadowed my his mouth which had blurted out

"so where is he? Is he okay? Whats going on?"

"now, now. Please calm down sir, I can tell you that Jiyong is alive", the entire group let out a breath and visibly relaxed at the new information.

"thank you, lord!" they all heard Youngbae whisper somewhere behind them, he always was the motherly one in the group, Seung-Hyun feels bad for him, and the others, for having to go through this ordeal, but he knew as well as anyone that they are like family and they would not want to be anywhere else right now, then right here waiting for their leader.

"okay, what is the situation then doctor?" came calmly from Daesung

"well, right now Jiyong is in theatre having the wound cleaned and stitched up, unfortunately.. His blood loss was too severe and as a result of lack of blood to his brain, he's slipped into a coma" before anyone could chime in she quickly added

"he having some transfusions while he is in having surgery, so right now im afraid all we can do is wait, I imagine he will only be in there for about an hour and a half, depending on the wound. But I can assure you all he is under the best care available."

Stunned by these new revelations Seung-Hyun was speechless; his GD was on some cold table having blood pumped into him at this very moment in an attempt to keep him alive. Sick, he felt sick, nauseous and light headed and he needed to sit down. Taking a few steps back, the back of his legs found what they were looking for, a chair, once they hit, his knees buckled and he thomped onto the chair, head down he had his eyes closed and his chin rested on his chest. Slumped over and attempting to calm down, Seung-Hyun's mind raced with the information and the one looming question, Is Jiyong going to wake up?

Is he going to wake up? That was the same questions all 4 of them couldn't rid from their thoughts, in the waiting room, they had all seated and were conversing quietly when after what seemed like forever another doctor came in.

All 4 men looked up in anticipation at the clearly well-seasoned doctor, all itching to ask the question but none willing to break the silence when it was done for the,

"Jiyong's surgery went well, the transfusion was also a success and he is being transferred to recovery as we speak, after a few hours of monitoring he will then be moved to his own room where you will all be able to visit him."

"Will he wake up?" the older Seung-Hyun blurted out, he needs to know right now and it saves the others from having to ask

"Unfortunately we cannot be sure right now; and all we can do now is wait. He may show signs of waking but if he does it'll definitely be after the anaesthesia wears off"

The doctor left, leaving the four men in the room to gather their thoughts

"so what? We can't see him yet?"

"No Seung-Hyun! We can't!" the oldest male snapped at the youngest, immediately regretting speaking to his junior like that quickly adding

"I'm sorry Seung-Hyun.. I didn't mean to snap at you. I know we're all worried about Jiyong"

"I knew he wasn't feeling like himself, but I didn't know he would go this far" came from Youngbae

Daesung sat back and just listened to the conversation, pondering if what his hyung had to say had anything to do with this or if there was any correlation. He'd said 'I love him'. Did Jiyong feel the same? Were his possible feelings for his hyung the reason for all of this? But there was no tension between any of them. The young vocalist was confused by all of this but that feeling was only dwarfed by his worry for their leader. He need to talk to his hyung asap, but they weren't alone, he needed to get rid of the other two before asking any questions and thinking on his feet an excuse popped into his head

"Youngbae, I think we could all use a coffee, could you and Seung-Hyun please go get us all some? We'll need it.. we'll be here for a while."

He had hoped that didn't sound suspicious to anyone and it seemed to work because Youngbae and the maknae left the waiting room agreeing that they would indeed need some coffee, and maybe even some food.

"Hyung.."

"I know Daesung, I gather you didn't tell you them what I said?"

"no"

"why"

"I was shocked, I knew it to be true when I heard you but I figured you would want to sort things out with Jiyong before you spoke to the rest of us, but now.."

"Thank you, Daesung I appreciate it" Seung-Hyun resisted very urge to hug the younger man, he was so happy to have him a part of his life, and this man was the epitome of a best friend and brother.

"Hyung.. do.. you think.."

"I honestly don't know Dae, he might share these feelings but I don't know.. how could I live if that is the case anyway? Because then he would be in here right now, because I didn't notice, because I didn't see any signs earlier.."

"No hyung, it isn't your fault; none of us knew it was this bad. We all feel that way too but 'what ifs' are never a good idea, we just have to be here for him right now, okay?"

"yeah Dae, you're right thanks for being such an amazing friend" This time the older male didn't fight the urge and stepped in to hug his friend, tight and loving he just wanted him to know how much he meant to the older male.

Stepping away from the embrace they both took a seat once more

"what do we do now"

"wait, you heard the doctor, it'll be hours before we're allowed to visit" Seung-Hyun sighed and slouched into his chair.

After a few more minutes of silence Youngbae and little Seung-Hyun made their entrance, bringing the holy essence known as coffee, it was cheap coffee, disgusting compared to what they're all used to but at this time none of them cared, it was hot and it soothed the, if only for the few minutes they drank it.

A little over an hour later and three of the four men had dozed off siting in their chairs, it had been a fairly exhausting day for them all, but the eldest member couldn't bring himself to sleep. Instead he got up and left the room, wondering any and all of the hallways that he had access to desperately waiting for any information that would suggest his GD would be okay and that he could finally go and see him.

Making his way back to the waiting room he caught the sight of the doctor who would be the barer of news, good or bad, he practically marched towards him

"news doc?"

"arh Seung-Hyun I was about to come to see you guys, Jiyong has been transferred to his own room, he is not awake but can have visitors now"

"where is he?!"

Checking his chart for the location of his charge, it was taking way too long to find as far as Seung-Hyun was concerned

"he is on.. Floor two, ward B room 22"

That was all the man needed to hear and he took off like a bat out of hell towards the elevator, not even thinking twice about not saying thank you to the doctor or bothering to go wake up the other men. He did feel guilty but unfortunately for them, Jiyong is at the top of his priority list right now.

Briskly walking, he found where he needed to be, standing outside of room 22 he had started shaking again now, he was really about to see the man he thinks he loves, he needs to see him now, not covered in blood, naked and lifeless, like the very last time he had seen him.

His heart thumping in his chest he clicked the door open and walked in, silence, it was silent except the machines beeping, the ones he knew where keeping Ji alive. The sight was not that much better than the state the young man was in last time, he was so pale and fragile looking, a ghost and like a shell of a man. But this was definitely better, even if helped by a machine, this time he knew Ji was breathing. He was alive and breathing.

Walking towards the bed and taking a seat at one of those super uncomfortable chairs that only hospitals seem to have, he took a seat and scooted forward. Taking the leaders right hand in his own the older male held it up to his face, kissed it, smelled it and kissed it again. This was his Ji, he was by his side, finally where he needed to be.

A wave of emotion washed over him like a tsunami, relief, happiness, hope, joy, sadness and anger for even allowing it to happen, in his exhaustion he could do nothing but weep.

Still holding Jiyong's hand, ran his thumb over the sleeping man's knuckles, repeating the words 'I'm so sorry, please forgive me' Seung-Hyun was a broken man in that moment and didn't care about anything else except his love when he stood up and leaned over the bed, and with tears dripping on the tubes that were keeping the one and only GDragon alive, Seung-Hyun kissed the man's forehead and whispered "I love you Ji, please wake up"

A/N

hey guys! whoa i have not written this much since highschool, i just finished this chapter i hope to follow with the next and possible last chapter within a few days! i want to apologize for any possible mistakes, i do not have a proof reader so im on my own there! haha please if you like it, leave a comment and tell me why, i love feedback and positive works best for motivation

anyways, i do you you enjoyed this!

Much love, Jeddy