Chapter 8 Breadown
Song: Mariah Carey- Breakdown
8 months ago:
Bella jumped out of her sleep feeling the bed dip beside her.
"Shhhhh baby it's just me" Edward whispered
"What the fuck?" She gasped "How did you get in here?"
"I stole Aly's keys" He laughed
"Get out" she sighed lying back down and closing her eyes
"Baby don't be mad at me…. I've missed you so much the last week…" His arms wrapped around her from behind.
Ignoring him Bella pushed his arms off of her and tried to go back to sleep.
"I know what you saw and I'm sorry I don't even really remember it I drank too much…." He sighed again wrapping his arms around her and pulling her against him.
"Please don't do this to me …" Bella whispered, fighting back the tears as hard as she could.
"Fuck… Please don't cry" He whispered nuzzling his nose into her neck and breathing in her sweet scent. "I'm so fucking sorry … god I don't know why I'm such an asshole." He sighed relaxing his grip on her.
"I'm so sick of this, I don't know how much more I can take Edward. You're always sorry, but you still hurt me again and again…." She cried breaking into sobs and curling in on herself.
"Fuck…" Edward sighed pulling her back into him again and rolling over so he was on top of her. "Bella I know I'm a fuck up…. but please give me a chance to be better for you, I promise it won't happen again, just please…."
Looking into her beautiful eyes he knew something had to change. Truthfully he didn't know why he was fucking around so much, she was perfect, and everything he ever wanted. All of his friends had long time girlfriends and for the most part seemed perfectly happy. But something always held him back when it came to Bella.
With the exception of Alice and Rosalie he had never had any type of relationship with a woman. His mother disappeared when he was young and his father died of a drug overdose when he was 12. He and Alice went to live with his Uncle Carlisle afterward and he had been single the entire time, only recently marrying.
Still, it was no excuse to hurt her this way. Wiping away her tears, he knew it was time to make her his for real, but the idea scared the shit out of him. Could he be a ….. Boyfriend?
"Please stop hurting me…" She whispered sounding so broken.
"I'll do everything I can baby, I promise." He sighed, his hands slipping down to her toned legs, which were bare, she only wore the tiniest little shorts to sleep. Her skin was so soft he groaned sliding his hand down her thigh.
"How would you feel… if you saw some guy hanging all over me… kissing me…"
"Fuck baby don't do that to me" He groaned the idea of it turning his stomach
"If it happens again…"She stopped catching her breath as his hands slowly rubbed up and down her thighs, skimming beneath the hem.
"It won't."
"If… If it does….. I'm…I'm done Edward" She gasped as his hands slid higher
"I'm sorry baby, just please let me make it better" He said kissing down her neck to her chest. Pulling aside the small tank top she wore he sucked her pretty pink nipple into his mouth.
"That's not fair…" She sighed
"Just let me make you feel good" He sighed kissing down her belly, his fingers tracing back and forth across the lace edge of her panties.
"Edward, what…. what are you" she gasped as he slid her panties down her legs.
"Shhhh baby" he said pressing his lips to her clit. "Let me kiss it better"
His tongue snuck out roaming over her clit before sucking it into his mouth. He couldn't show her in words, but he would do his best to show her physically how much he adored her.
She tasted fucking incredible and he could barely control himself, sucking and licking on her as much as he could.
"You're so perfect baby" he sighed in between licks "and you taste so god damn good" he groaned
Present day
EPOV:
Every day that went by without seeing her was hard. But seeing her… was so much harder. After the fight, I realized I couldn't do this anymore not just to myself but to her as well. She didn't ask for any of this, I was a fucking asshole, and that was nobody's fault but my own. Seeing her with that preppy motherfucker only made it worse.
"Hey bro…."Emmett said walking through the door. "What was so fucking urgent?"
"I'm going to New York; can you take me to the airport tomorrow night?"
"Oh, going to visit Uncle C?"
"No, I mean like … I'm leaving, for a while at least" I sighed looking away from my friend.
"Dude you can't be serious" He laughed
"I am, this isn't good for me …. and it's definitely not good for her. Somethings gotta give."
Silence surrounded them for a moment and I could tell he hated the idea.
"Fine, I'll support you on this… under one condition" He sighed
"Let me guess…. you have to talk to Ro first?" I laughed
"She loves you and she would never forgive me if I let you leave without even saying goodbye to her" Emmett yelled. "Fuck.. and what about Alice?"
I sat back on the couch downing the rest of my beer. Emmett was right and I knew it, but I had to go and for once I was going to do it the right way.
BPOV:
I was so fucking late and Rose was going to kill me. She invited me over for dinner a few days ago and said it was important, I was kind of assuming at this point she was either engaged or pregnant, the way she was badgering me about it.
Running in the door I immediately knew there was something wrong. One look at Rose, that's all it took. Walking into the kitchen she turned from the stove to face me. Her eyes were red and puffy but she faked a smile for me.
"Hey…." I hugged her. "Is everything ok?"
"Yeah…. fine just chopped an onion sorry" She rambled turning back to stir her sauce.
"Anything I can help with?" I asked
"No B… just um…. fuck…. we need to talk" She whispered
"What's going on Ro?"
"Look I think you should go talk to Edward"
"You're serious? Since when Ro, you're always telling me to leave him alone…"
"It's not like that just …. Fuck… please go talk to him… like now." She said her eyes scrunching in frustration
"Ok, Fine" I said pouring myself a glass of wine. I walked down the hall and knocked on the partially open door to Edwards room "Edward?" I asked sticking my head inside a bit. What I saw floored me. Two Suit cases filled with clothes, and Edward in his closet filling another.
"Hey Beautiful" He sighed
"Going somewhere?" I asked confused
"New York" He sighed
"Oh! Visiting Carlisle… that's so great is Aly going with you?" I asked
"No… ummmm not visiting…. moving actually" He said avoiding eye contact
"Oh my god! You guys finally convinced them to move out here? That's so great Edward"
"No…. I mean…." Edward sighed finally making eye contact "I'm the one who is moving Bella."
Silence filled the room as their eyes met. At first I couldn't comprehend what he was saying, but I knew after a few moments that he meant it.
"After what happened at the club…. Baby, I just ….. this isn't good for you and neither am I" He sighed "Maybe if I leave you can have a normal life….. without me."
"What? NO! You don't need to leave its fine…..we can figure it out Edward we just need time" I cried
"No amount of time is going to change the fact that I'm an asshole, or how much I've hurt you, all I can do is get the fuck out of the way so you can have a good life without me interfering." He sighed running his hands through his hair in frustration. "Or before I get arrested for beating the shit out of that asshole you're dating"
"I don't…. I just don't understand, please don't leave… please" I begged, breaking into a sob and damn near dropping to my knees.
Edward wrapped his arms around me holding me up.
"I Love you Bella" He sighed. "All these years I've been so selfish, I won't hurt you anymore baby."
"You can't be serious… what about Aly? She needs you…."
"We already spoke this afternoon and she knows, besides she has Jasper" He sighed
Breaking down I sat back onto the bed covering my face with my hands. I was prepared to live without him until I realized what that actually meant. A knock at the door interrupted my thoughts as Emmett stuck his head through the door.
"If you want to make your plane we gotta get going bro" he said not looking me in the eye
"Yeah, I'll be right out." he sighed handing Emmett two suit cases.
"You can't go" I cried
"I have to Bella. Please don't forget I will always love you. I just want you to be happy baby." He sighed
His hands landed on either side of my face and I cuddled into him, but when I opened my eyes he was crying and reality came back to me.
"Don't" I whispered
"I love you baby…" He sighed before turning and walking out the door.