Chapter 8

Rey tossed and turned that night, feeling ill at ease with way she had spoken to Ren. Though her words had been true enough, it was through no fault of his own that the ladies had spoken so ill of her, and she had responded to him rather harshly. Once her irritation had calmed, she felt the weight of guilt over her words with Ren settle in her stomach. That, along with the encounter with the Sindian women, kept her from sleep a good portion of the night, and what little rest she did get was fitful.

When dawn broke, Rey got out of bed and walked to the window, rubbing her hands up and down her arms. She remained this way, staring out without seeing, lost in thoughts of her encounter with Ren and wondering why it should be bothering her so, until a soft knock at the door startled her out of her reverie. Beatrice entered, seeming surprised to see her awake.

"I did not mean to disturb you, ma'am," she said.

Rey forced a smile. "You did not disturb me. I'm afraid sleep refused to come last night. I've been awake for a good while now."

Beatrice walked over to her, stopping some distance away, seeming worried. "I hope you are feeling better today, ma'am."

Rey dropped her smile and sighed. "No, but I intend to change that. I'm afraid I owe Ren an apology. His mother as well, as I was rather rude when I left her home so suddenly." She took another breath and squared her shoulders. "Please dress me in something suitable for calling on the Princess. I shall go directly after breakfast."

Beatrice nodded and headed into the closet while Rey sat at her vanity and brushed out her hair. Sometime in the night she had decided it would be best to apologize to Ren for snapping at him because, despite everything else, he was not at fault for what lies the local gossips were spreading. Having had but a taste of the life of a high born lady, Rey could well imagine the ease with which one might take up gossiping and slander as a form of diversion, though it did not excuse the ladies' behavior. However, neither was their behavior and slander the fault of Ren and, though there were still several things which worried Rey about Ren's behavior and answers the previous evening, for her own outburst she would apologize.

Once dressed, and feeling oddly anxious, Rey headed to the dining room, surprised upon entering to find Ren already seated at the table. Rey was beginning to suspect her husband was an early riser. Swallowing down nerves, she walked over to him, stopping and clasping her hands in front of her.

Clearing her throat, Rey gathered her courage as Ren stood in surprise.

"I wish to apologize for my behavior this last evening," Rey began.

Ren blinked rapidly, obviously shocked.

"I was rather distraught to learn what the local ladies are thinking of me," she continued, her stare dropping to Ren's shoes, "and let my emotions overwhelm me. It is through no fault of your own that they are spreading malicious lies and it was wrong of me to speak so harshly to you. I hope you can forgive me for showing so little respect for your own feelings on the matter and pray that you shan't hold my behavior against me in the future."

When she finished, silence filled the room. Ren grabbed her hand suddenly and Rey looked up at him in shock, lips parting as warmth spread up her arm.

"I will not hold it against you if you will forgive me for my own bumbling words," Ren said, looking down at their hands. "I have not been blessed with my mother's ability with words. Rather I inherited my father's proclivity for blundering speech." He paused and Rey swallowed, taken aback at hearing Ren speak so. He looked back up at her. "I did not mean to insult you or those of your former station by insinuating that I found such behavior by those of my station praiseworthy. What I so ineloquently expressed was intended as shock that anyone would find such a rumor believable as it is not the usual way in which such situations are handled. Were that the case, then one would find a great many of the ladies in the peerage were of low birth." Ren stopped, taking a deep breath, his thumb brushing back and forth on the top of Rey's hand. "As it is, such rumors will be greatly diminished once enough time passes without a child being produced." He continued, his grip on her hand tightening, barely concealed anger coloring his voice. "In the meantime, we shall both do what we can to dispel such slanderous gossip as we encounter it."

Rey stared at her husband, at a loss for how to respond. This was certainly not how she had expected the conversation to go. In fact, Rey was quite sure this was the most Ren had said in any of their conversations thus far.

"I…thank you, sir," she finally managed to say, feeling very discombobulated. What Ren had just expressed flew directly in the face of Rey's assumptions thus far regarding the motivations for his recent actions.

Ren dropped her hand suddenly and stepped back, clearing his throat. "Yes, well…I had best finish my breakfast." Sitting down and looking at his plate as he picked up his tea, he said in a much more formal tone, "You must surely be hungry yourself."

Rey turned to walk to the sideboard to procure her own breakfast, but stopped halfway there, turning and hesitating, before squaring her shoulders and asking, "Does it bother you?" When Ren looked up in confusion, Rey clarified. "My…My former station. Does it bother you that I am not a high born lady?"

Ren frowned, though his eyes showed confusion rather than anger. "It bothers me that people will talk, but no. It does not bother me that you are not a high born lady. If you'll recall, I was not born into the peerage myself. As my father has no title I, myself, grew up without one."

Rey nodded. "Yes, but you have always been assured a life of privilege, with a Princess for a mother."

Ren regarded her a moment, an emotion Rey could not identify flickering behind his eyes. "That is true enough, I suppose, though my lack of title was fodder for teasing among my peers when we were children."

"Did it bother you?" Rey asked, forgetting about breakfast entirely and walking back towards the table.

Ren looked away, sipping his tea again. "Indeed." Abruptly his gaze returned to her and he changed the subject. "Were no attempts ever made to find your parents?"

Rey sighed and turned back towards the sideboard, grabbing a plate. "I can only assume Mr. Plutt took every measure to locate them, though he never confided in me." He had certainly groused enough about the situation. Rey could not imagine he had not tried to find the people responsible for leaving her in his care so suddenly.

They both fell silent as Rey filled her plate and returned to the table. Ren sat sipping tea, his empty plate before him, reading the day's paper. After several minutes of what felt like companionable silence, Ren suddenly set down his paper, opening and closing his mouth. Rey cocked her head in confusion, toast halfway to her lips, as Ren took a deep breath, looking determined.

"Are you really so unhappy here?" he asked.

Rey blinked at him in shock, heat filling her cheeks as she realized her words of the previous evening had bothered him so.

"I…"

She wasn't sure how best to answer. Was she happy? She couldn't really say she was, but it felt ungrateful to say so when there were so many others in the world with so much less at their fingertips than she now had.

Setting down her toast, she grabbed her napkin, dabbing at her mouth, as she had been instructed by Miss Tico, in order to gain some time in which to think of a proper answer.

"If you are unhappy here, then please just say so," Ren said suddenly. "Do not fear for my feelings."

Taking a deep breath, Rey replied, "I don't know that unhappy is precisely the right word." She looked around the room, taking in the opulence than in such a short time was already starting to become common place to her. "I simply feel set adrift." She looked back at Ren, finding him watching her with a guarded expression. "Though I cannot exactly claim I enjoyed my time with Mr. Plutt, I did have a purpose there. I knew what was expected of me and was busy from the time I awoke to the time I blew out my candle. I have no purpose here with which to fill my time. My – " she stumbled over the words, heat spreading up her face. "My lessons take up a portion of the day, it is true, but then I am left with nothing but reading to fill my time. I have no companion with which to pass the day, no hobbies, no skills to improve."

Rey bit her lip, wishing to say more but not daring. She felt married to a stranger, one who had not expressed any interest in her prior to this morning. Though she had not had romantic notions about the union, she had held onto a hope of companionship, and Ren spending his every waking moment in his study made such companionship unlikely. That he was interested now was rather curious.

Ren watched her, seeming lost in thought. Before either of them could say more, a footman arrived with a letter. Rey returned to her breakfast as Ren opened the letter, assuming it not be of interest to her.

Ren read the card quickly, set it on the table, and looked back at Rey.

"It appears we have been invited to another ball."

Rey's eyebrows flew up and she couldn't help the smile breaking out. Just as quickly, however, the smile dropped.

"Will we be attending?" she asked. She recalled Rose informing her of Ren's general eschewing of balls, and her friends would not be accompanying her. The thought of facing a room full of women such as Lady Sindian was abhorrent, as well.

Ren watched her carefully, more emotion flickering behind his eyes, a muscle in his jaw ticking.

Carefully folding his previously discarded newspaper, he said in an air of nonchalance, "Yes, I think we will."

Rey blinked in shock, not expecting that answer at all. "We will?"

Ren nodded. "Yes. The ball is at the home of a widow, a longtime friend of my mother's, Lady Holdo. Though I have not seen her myself in many years, I have no doubt that she will show you the respect you were not shown by Lady Sindian." Ren swallowed and then cleared his throat. "As well, it would be a good chance to address rumors directly."

Rey nodded and returned her gaze quickly to her breakfast, wondering just what she could expect from this ball, as the last one had left her with a marriage proposal.

Rey had just finished up breakfast and was headed towards the stairs to fetch her gloves when Mr. Mitaka opened the door to Princess Leia.

Seeing her, Rey halted in surprise. "Your Grace, I was not expecting you."

Leia walked over, taking her hand. "I apologize for not writing before I came but I wished to come to apologize for the disastrous tea yesterday. You must know I had no idea Lady Sindian would behave so horribly."

Rey shook her head. "I was just now preparing to call on you myself to apologize for leaving so suddenly. It was terribly rude of me."

Leia smiled, turning and tucking Rey's hand in the crook of her arm as she walked them towards the drawing room. "Then let's both agree never to speak of it again. Forgiveness all around."

Rey smiled tentatively, taken aback by Leia's familiar behavior. "Of course."

Ren walked out of the library as they passed by, book in hand, stopping suddenly when he saw them. His mouth thinned into an unhappy line.

"Mother," he said. "What are you doing here?"

Rey glanced between the princess and her son, wondering why Ren's manner was so cold and formal with his own mother.

Leia patted Rey's hand on her arm. "I came to apologize to your dear wife for the unruly behavior of my guests yesterday afternoon."

Ren's eyes moved to Rey's hand on his mother's arm, a slight frown making his already severe expression even more so.

"Perhaps you could join us in the drawing room?" Leia asked, with something akin to hope in her voice. Rey again looked between the two, curious as to the manner of relationship between them. She knew Ren rarely attended their balls, and he had thus far made no mention of dining with his parents so that she could get to know her new relatives. Now that she thought of it, Rey did not recall ever seeing Ren interact with his father at their reception, and only with his mother when she started the conversation.

Ren's eyes moved to his mother's and he shook his head. "I'm afraid there are matters which require my attention. Good day."

Nodding his head at the both of them, Ren walked briskly away and into his study.

Leia sighed as she watched him leave, and Rey got the sense Leia was unhappy with the relationship, or lack thereof, which she had with her son.

Tugging lightly on her arm, Rey began to pull the princess in the direction of the drawing room.

Once inside, Rey pulled the bell pull by the door as Leia looked around and sat on one of the settees. Sitting opposite her, Rey held herself straight as a ramrod, determined to make a better impression than she had the previous day.

Leia looked around the room as Rey grappled for a topic of conversation.

"Th-the room is to be redecorated," Rey said.

Leia smiled and looked back at her. "Yes, I suppose the furnishings are rather out of style, though I do think the room is nice as it is."

Rey fidgeted with her hands, feeling self-conscious. She sensed that the princess could be a valuable ally in her new life, and what she had seen thus far of the princess's character had done quite a lot to recommend her. Though Leia had been born and raised in opulence and fortune, she did not seem to look down upon those beneath her station.

Clearing her throat, Rey pressed on. "Yes. It does seem a waste to replace perfectly good furniture, but I have been informed that, as a duchess, it is upon me to keep up with the latest fashions."

Leia scoffed. "Don't let the stuffy peerage ideals change you, dear. If you prefer the room as it is, then far be it from anyone to criticize you for not wasting money on things you do not need."

Rey's shoulder's relaxed and she truly smiled as she looked around the room. "There might be a few changes I would like to do. Do you know what one does with furniture that is being replaced? It would be a shame to have it sit idle and useless when there are so many in need."

A footman entered with their tea and, as they added cream and sugar, Leia replied, "I do not know of a charity for such things, though that does seem a good idea."

Rey sipped her tea. "How do you mean?"

"Well, one could donate the furniture to families in need, or could sell the furniture at a discounted price and use the money itself to help the less fortunate."

Rey sat up straighter, her mind beginning to race, feeling a purpose she had been missing these last weeks. "That's a wonderful idea." Frowning as she thought, the tea in her hand entirely forgotten along with her nerves, Rey wondered over the logistics of such a charity. "How often do members of the peerage redecorate their homes?"

Leia laughed. "Too often. Not an entirely new house all at once, naturally, but there are some who waste quite a lot of money trying to keep up with latest fashion. I'm sure a sizable charity could be started in no time."

Rey was too lost in her now racing thoughts to see the small smile upon Leia's face as she watched Rey's dreary countenance replaced with vivid excitement.

"It is good to see you excited, my dear," Leia said several minutes later, sipping her tea.

Rey blinked rapidly, startled from her excited reverie, and smiled. "It's good to feel excited again."

"Have you been missing excitement in your life?" Leia asked. "I should think such a change in fortune would cause quite a bit of excitement."

Rey chewed at her lip, hoping she had not offended the princess. "Of course. It has been very…different."

Leia raised her eyebrows. "There is no need to worry of offending me. You forget that I married a man outside the peerage myself." Her eyes grew sad. "Han has never really adjusted to life married to a princess. I know a person adrift when I see one."

Rey sighed, setting her cup of tea aside. "I do not wish to appear ungrateful. In a great many ways, my life now is far superior to my life with Mr. Plutt. However, your assessment that I feel adrift is an astute one." Rey glanced around her. "I'm afraid I was not prepared as a young lady to be a duchess and find myself constantly overwhelmed with the variety of rules one must follow. It took me several tries to eat a bowl of soup correctly."

Leia chuckled. "Yes. There are a great many ridiculous rules for how one is to act proper. But I have no doubt you are up to the challenge. I should have done my best to stop Ben from marrying you had I thought you would not be equal to the task."

Rey stared, taken aback by the princess's assessment of her. "Begging your pardon, ma'am, but how could you have known my character. I had but spoken one greeting to you prior to my wedding."

Leia eyed her, worry evident in her expression. "I have worried for my son since the moment he struck up a friendship with that insufferable Duke Snoke, and have done my best to have eyes and ears all over to alert me to any real danger he may be in. When word of your hasty engagement reached my ears, I was absolutely confounded. Ben may be rash, but he has eschewed marriage for years despite pressure from myself, His Majesty, and even, if rumors are true, the late Duke himself. So you'll forgive a concerned mother for wishing to ascertain the character of the woman who had managed the impossible task of capturing her son's affections when so many others had failed."

"I-" Rey broke off, discombobulated. Shaking her head she managed to find her voice. "I'm afraid you are mistaken, ma'am. I have not captured Ren's affections. He rarely speaks to me, spending most days in his study, and when he does speak it is usually to correct some blunder I'm unknowingly making. We have been married for a short time and have had an argument nearly every time we speak." Rey shook her head again. "I apologize for being so vulgar in my honesty, ma'am, but I must set your notion of affection between Ren and I to right. If this is what it means to have Ren's affections, then I am very glad not to have the man's apathy or ire."

Rey was uncertain what agitated her so about the princess's assessment, but speaking of Ren's affection for her felt very inconsistent to the behavior she had thus far encountered. The princess watched Rey's speech with a shrewd expression, quietly sipping her tea.

"Of course," Leia said. "I must have been mistaken."

Rey wished to say more, as the princess seemed not to have changed her opinion, but kept quiet. She had already shared quite a lot more than prudence and manners dictate.

"And how is it that you were able to ascertain my character prior to the marriage," Rey asked, trying to redirect the conversation back to her prior inquiry.

Leia smiled. "I asked Mrs. Smith. I seemed to recall you attended our ball with the couple at your side. Rose had quite a lot of good things to say about your character."

Rey smiled, happy to hear her friend had spoken so well of her.

"Yes, Rose is a very dear friend," Rey said, wistfulness creeping into her tone.

Leia reached over and grabbed Rey's hand. "I can well understand the need for friends and I can imagine it is difficult to have none in your own station."

Rey pressed her lips together to hold back a sudden, irrational bout of tears and nodded.

Leia squeezed Rey's hand before looking behind her at the clock and tsk-tsking. "Though this is a terrible point to end our conversation, I'm afraid I must be going. I had not meant to linger so long."

They both rose, Leia grabbing Rey's hand and folding it over her arm again as they walked towards the awaiting carriage. Before stepping in, Leia leaned over to kiss Rey's cheek, patting the other one as she said affectionately, "Do not fret over your position, my dear. You'll learn how to act the duchess soon enough and will have admirers lined up at the door waiting for the chance to become your friend."

Rey swallowed past a sudden lump in her throat and smiled in return. She was not used to motherly affection given so freely, and found herself wishing for more of it in a way she had not since she was a small girl. Something in Leia's expression softened as she looked at Rey. Patting her cheek once more, Leia entered the carriage and left the estate.

A/N: Thanks so much for reading! Reviews always appreciated. :)