Legends

Robin spun to look at the Doctor. "Be sick!"

"I'm sorry?"

"Beat your breast. Moan. Groan as though twenty devils possessed your guts."

The Doctor frowned. "What for?"

"To attract the guard's attention," Adelaide offered.

He made a face. "It's your plan. You moan."

"No, no, no, it won't work."

"Why?"

"Oh, because you're clearly more advanced in years and you have a sickly aspect to you."

That just made the Doctor's frown deepen. "I have a what?"

"You're as pale as milk." Robin shrugged, glancing at Adelaide. "It's the way with Scots. They're strangers to vegetables."

"Why can't Adelaide do it?"

"Because she glows with the essence of youth," Robin said, grinning.

"You're not allowed to compliment her!"

"Robin," Adelaide sighed, "the Doctor's not going to be moaning anytime soon."

"Fine," he huffed. "If you want something doing..." he gave a loud moan. "Can I rely upon you to do the rest?" he hissed to the Doctor.

"Yes, yes, I know the drill."

Robin moaned again and they saw the guard through the grill at the door. "What is this din?"

"No business of yours, cur!" He leaned closer to Robin. "Speak up. I can't hear you."

"What ails him?"

"None of your business!"

That got the guard to enter the cell. "I said, what ails him?"

"Well," the Doctor nodded to Robin, "if you must know, he's having a nervous breakdown."

"A what?"

"He's like this whenever he's in any kind of danger. He just can't seem to cope. He gets so afraid." The Doctor shook his head. "He goes into a kind of fit. I honestly believe that he may die of sheer fright, like some tiny, shivering little mouse." He made a face. "Oh God, I think he's soiled himself."

"Let him die." The guard moved to leave the cell again. "It will save us the trouble of executing him."

"And what will happen to the reward?"

The guard paused, and Adelaide was honestly shocked at how easy it was to trick him. "Reward?"

"Oh God," the Doctor's eyes widened, "I shouldn't have said that."

"Tell me!"

"He carries a vital message. The Prince has promised a bounty."

"A big one?"

"An enormous one."

Robin mumbled something and the guard leaned closer, trying to hear it. "What's that? Say again?"

"Come closer," Robin breathed, and the guard obeyed. "Your breath stinks like a serpent, has anyone ever told you that?" He head-butted the guard, knocking him out cold. "Soiled myself?"

"Did you? That's getting into character." The Doctor leaned forward. "Okay, keys."

"I'll get them." Both men started to stretch forward, attempting to use their feet to get the guard's keys.

"No, no, I'll get them."

"I'll get them, I'll get them!"

"I'm fine, no, no worries. I've got them!"

"I've got them! I'll get..."

But with a splash, they managed to kick the guard's keys soundly down the drain. There was a moment of silence. "Bravo," Adelaide said and they both turned to see that she was standing between them, holding her sonic pen and looking some mixture of amused and annoyed. "I'm very tempted to just leave you here."

"How did you..."

"The men of this era don't tend to search the inner pockets of a well-dressed lady." She crossed her arms. "Would serve both of you well to be stuck in a dungeon alone together for longer."

"Please?" Adelaide didn't look as she soniced the Doctor's chains, releasing him before Robin. "The magic word!"

"Honestly have no idea how I survived without sonics before we met," Adelaide said, freeing Robin before leaving the cell.

"Does she do this often?" Robin called after the Doctor.

"Do what?"

"Rescue you."

He grinned. "She's the boss."

"You're a very lucky man." Before the Doctor could say anything, Robin darted past him and after Adelaide.

|C-S|

After dealing with the men arguing over which direction they would go in the palace, Adelaide was struck with the fact this was probably what she and the Doctor were like in their first few adventures after she'd opened the fob watch – though for a very different reason. Still, teasing the Doctor about that had had the desired end of getting him to finally pay attention to where they were going instead of just how to best Robin.

For some reason, that reaction only served to make Robin grin, which had Adelaide thinking that he and Clara would be very well suited. The girl had developed a tendency to smile at odd moments after the Doctor and Adelaide had spoken.

Once the Doctor was focused, it didn't take them that long to encounter a metal door that clearly didn't come from this era of history. He went inside first, finding a central console and monitor. "At last," he grinned. "Something real. No more fairy tales."

"What is this place?" Robin asked, looking around them.

"A spaceship. More twenty-ninth century than twelfth." He worked on the monitor. "Data banks, data banks, data banks. Where was this ship headed?" he managed to pull up some information, glancing at Adelaide when he saw the name. "The Promised Land again."

Adelaide touched the console. "Similar to the Half-Face Man, but this is more sophisticated."

He nodded. "It disguised itself as a twelfth-century castle." A diagram appeared, showing the ship landing. "It merges into the culture, tries to keep a low profile, so no one notices. That explains the robot knights. But the engines...the engines are damaged. They're leaking radiation into the local atmosphere."

"Creating temporary climate change."

"I beg pardon?"

"She told you, it's too sunny," the Doctor said. "It's too green. And there is even an evil sheriff to oppress the locals. This explains everything, even you." He gestured at Robin.

"It does?"

"Well, what does every oppressed peasant workforce need? The illusion of hope. Some silly story to get them through the day, lull them into docility, and keep them working. Ship's data banks," he messed with the console more, pulling up records. "Full of every myth and legend you could hope for, including Robin Hood." Various versions of the tale flickered past on the screen. "Isn't it time you came clean with us? You're not real and you know it. Look at you," he turned, focusing on the man. "Perfect eyes, perfect teeth. Nobody has a jawline like that. You're as much a part of what is happening here as the Sheriff and his metal knights. You're a robot."

Robin stiffened, clearly angered. "You dare to accuse me of collusion with that villain, the Sheriff?"

The Doctor stepped forward, almost moving to stand in front of Adelaide given how they'd ended up standing. "I dare."

"You false-tongued knave! I should have skewered you when I had the chance."

The Doctor scoffed. "I would like to see you try." They were interrupted by the door being blown inwards. "Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah."

The Sheriff, with Clara and some robotic knights, entered the room. "Surrender, outlaw!"

The Doctor began to clap. "Very good."

"Kill him." The Sheriff turned to the knights. "Kill Robin Hood."

"You can drop all that stuff now, Sheriff."

Clara leaned forward. "Adelaide?"

"He is not what you think he is. This is all play-acting."

But Adelaide was frowning. "Doctor..."

"We can't just let them kill him!"

"You're not fooling anyone, Sheriff," the Doctor continued, not seeming to hear Adelaide or Clara.

One of the knights shot at Robin, only managing to knock him off his feet. Clara ran to be between him and the knight, but Robin just leaped forward, grabbed her around the waist, and moved back to the window. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Surviving." Robin met the Time Lords' eyes before falling backward.

"No!" The Doctor shouted, running forward. "No! Clara!" He watched them land in the moat.

"Yeah," the Sheriff said, Adelaide still focused on him, "sorry about the girl. Such a pretty thing. What a queen she would have made." He turned away and the Doctor stepped back from the window, giving Adelaide a nod to know that Robin and Clara had survived their fall.

"Stop pretending," he told the Sheriff. "You and your fancy robots. We get it. We understand."

"Oh, so you too know my plans?"

"You and the robots are plundering the surrounding countryside for all its gold," Adelaide said, "in order to create a matrix of gold to repair the engine circuitry." The Doctor glanced at her. "That's basic science, Doctor, even I know that's how gold works."

The Sheriff nodded. "This is the scheme the Mechanicals have devised. Soon this skyship will depart. Destination, London. There I will obliterate the King and take my rightful place as ruler of this sceptered isle."

"It won't work. There's not a chance. We've seen the instruments. There's been too much damage. You are stoking up a gigantic bomb!"

The Sheriff waved a hand at them. "Shush."

A knight stepped up, knocking out Adelaide and then the Doctor in quick succession.

|C-S|

Adelaide was the first one to wake in the base of the castle, where various robot knights were working. She didn't have that long to examine the current situation before he started awake, doing so far more violently than Adelaide had.

"Kind of them to keep chaining us up next to each other," Adelaide mumbled, making the Doctor grin.

"Still have your sonic?"

"Just have to reach it."

As she worked to reach the particular pocket where she kept her sonic in this dress, the Doctor examined their surroundings. "Engine capacity at forty-eight percent," one of the knights said, making him frown.

"It's not enough. That's not enough. It'll never make orbit." They could hear the people being worked to death by the robots around them, interspersed with a mechanical sound. "That's the engines, building in power. Stupid, stupid Sheriff." Adelaide managed to pull out her sonic, angling it to free herself. "What are you looking at?" she glanced over, seeing a young woman she hadn't noticed watching them.

"I think I understand you," the young woman said. "The Sheriff's using the gold to replace something."

He nodded. "That's the principle. But he's a moron. If he tries to fly this ship, it'll explode and wipe out half the country." He glanced at Adelaide. "What we need is a little riot. Time to reflect on lasers and gold. Spread the word."

The woman nodded, turning and rushing back to where the rest of the people were. Adelaide quickly freed the Doctor before they both continued to sit like they were still chained, needing to give the woman as much time as possible before the robots realized something was wrong.

"How did you manage without a sonic?" he asked, repeating her question from earlier

"I didn't get into many situations that required me to free myself." He frowned. "You do realize that the primary reason we keep getting into these situations is you."

"More fun that way."

Adelaide sighed, shaking her head. "Different kinds of fun."

"And different is good?"

"Different is okay."

|C-S|

A robot approached them, scanning the pair. "You are fit for labor." It directed its attention to the woman, who'd approached them again. "Stand aside while these peasant units are freed."

"I'm afraid you're a little late," the Doctor said.

"Explain."

"We're already free!" they pulled their hands from behind their back. The robot began to power up its laser, but the Doctor grabbed a golden plate and redirected the beam back at the robot, exploding its head.

More robots started to gather, but when they attempted to use the lasers the other people used their own reflective objects to fight back. A few people were hit by misdirected beams, but far more robots were. "Everyone, the last one!" the Doctor called, the people surrounding the final robot. The beam bounced around the reflective surfaces, building in power until it finally hit the robot, destroying it. "Out, out! Everyone, quickly, get out! Quickly!"

The people fled, but the woman rushed up to them again. "You've saved us all! Thank you!" she kissed the Doctor's cheek, rushing off after the people as the Time Lords hurried further into the tunnels, attempting to find the main control room.

"Engine capacity at eighty-two percent," a robot announced, the Time Lords entered a room full of melting vats and the Sheriff.

The man turned to them. "You are indeed ingenious, Doctor, Adelaide, but do you really think your peasants' revolt can stop me?"

"I rather think you're the revolting one around here." The Doctor made a face. "I'm bantering, I'm bantering."

"You don't have enough gold content to seal the engine breach," Adelaide called up. "If you attempt to take off, you'll likely wipe out half of England."

"Liar!"

"Adelaide doesn't lie! Lying is rude!"

The Sheriff wasn't perturbed by the Doctor's shout. "From my sky vessel, I shall rule omnipotent."

"You pudding-headed primitive, shut down the engines. What you're doing will alter the course of history."

The Sheriff grinned. "I sincerely hope so, or I wouldn't be bothering." He tossed a robot's head into the vat next to him.

"Listen to us," the Doctor tried. "It doesn't have to end like this. Shut it all down, return Clara to us and we'll do what we can."

The Sheriff frowned. "I don't have Clara."

"Robin's one of yours."

"What did you say?"

"He's one of your tin-headed puppets, just like these brutes here," the Doctor waved a hand towards the robots.

"Robin Hood is not one of mine."

"Of course he is," he scoffed. "He's a robot, created by your mechanical mates."

"Why would they do that?"

He shrugged. "To pacify the locals, give them false hope. He's the opiate of the masses."

"Doctor," Adelaide said, "why would they create an enemy to fight them?"

"Yes, that would be a rubbish idea. Why would you do that?" he frowned at her, shaking his head. "But he can't be...he's not real...he's a legend!"

"Too kind!" Robin called from above them, having appeared in the gallery above. "And this legend does not come alone."

Clara waved. "Hiya!"

Robin, grabbing Clara around the waist, used his dagger to slide down the wall to the Time Lords' level. "You alright?"

Clara grinned. "Hello yeah."

"Good." He hurried over to the Time Lords. "My men have taken the castle."

"No!" the Sheriff shouted.

Robin turned to him. "Now I'm going to take you."

The Sheriff glared. "This one's all mine." He touched an amulet on his neck, shutting off the two robots around him before walking closer to Robin. "What do you say, outlaw? A final reckoning?"

"Oh, yes." Robin lifted his sword, their fight beginning.

Clara hurried over to the Time Lords. "Are you okay?" the Doctor asked her.

"Fine, yeah."

"Good."

Adelaide glanced around them, the whole building starting to rumble. "We don't have long."

"I shall avenge every slight, outlaw!" the Sheriff shouted.

"The whole castle's about to blow."

"You have long been a thorn in my side!"

"Well," Robin shrugged, "everyone should have a hobby. Mine's annoying you."

Clara elbowed the Doctor. "So's yours." He made a face.

"I'll have you boiled in oil at the castle by sunset."

"Can we make it a little earlier? Cos that's a little past my bedtime." Robin cut a rope, using it to launch him up to the beams.

The Sheriff did the same. "I'm too much for you, outlaw. The first of a new breed. Half man, half engine. Never aging. Never tiring."

Robin frowned. "Are you still talking?"

The Sheriff managed to cut Robin's arm, forcing him to drop his sword and scramble for his dagger. Robin took a step back, gesturing for the man to step forward. "Bow down before your new king, you prince of knaves!" The Sheriff obeyed, lunging, and Robin did the same technique as the Doctor earlier, twisting so that he and the Sheriff were back to back before he shoved the man into the vat below.

Robin didn't wait to see what happened, using a rope to bring himself back to the ground. "Sorry. Was that...was that showing off?"

"That was amazing!" Clara laughed.

The castle started to shake again, more that time. "Run!" the Doctor ordered, grabbing Adelaide's hand. "Come on, run!"

|C-S|

They found the collection of Merry Men waiting across the moat, though they all turned when they heard the crashing sound of the ship – which had been disguised as the keep – breaking free of the stone and taking flight. "It's never going to make it," the Doctor said. "Not enough gold. It'll never make it into orbit." He frowned, turning to the men and patting his pockets. "Where is it? Where did it go?"

"Where did what go?" Clara asked.

"The golden arrow!"

"Tuck!" Robin spun.

"You took it?"

Tuck shrugged. "Of course we did. We're robbers."

The Doctor grinned. "I love you boys."

"Doctor," Clara frowned, "what are you suggesting?"

"The golden arrow may just have enough gold content to get the ship into orbit and out of harm's way," Adelaide explained.

The Doctor held out the bow to Robin, but the man shook his head. "No, it has to be you. My arm is injured."

He turned it to Adelaide, but the Time Lady frowned. "What about me makes you suspect that I'll be able to properly fire an arrow?"

"Calculate the proper angle and resistance?"

She raised her eyebrows. "I'm a biologist, not a mathematician."

"Why can't you do it?" Clara asked the Doctor. "You won the tournament."

"I cheated. I made a special arrow with a homing device." He leaned closer to her. "Adelaide wasn't that happy."

"I never said anything!"

Clara sighed. "Robin, you aim it, the Doctor and I hold it, and Adelaide shoots it. Teamwork."

The four hurried into position, Robin helping Adelaide aim it before shooting it, hitting right in the middle of an engine. The ship started flying faster, getting just enough thrust to enter the orbit before it exploded.

The crowd cheered once they'd succeeded. "One awful day in Nottingham," Alan started to sing, "Brave Robin Hood was in a jam. The arrow flew it true..."

Will pulled the lute from him, making Alan pout. "Give it a rest, Alan."

"Give me my lute!"

Clara shook her head at them, turning back to the Time Lord and Robin. "Still not keen on the laughing thing?"

"No, no, no, no," he shook his head.

Clara and Robin laughed loudly, the Merry Men joining in, and the Time Lords smiled, standing close to each other, hands just brushing.

|C-S|

The Time Lords stepped out of the TARDIS just as Robin and Clara finished her archery lesson. Adelaide had forced the Doctor to give them more privacy, which had been quite difficult because the man hadn't liked the thought of Clara getting so personal with a man. Adelaide had just shaken her head at him.

While in the TARDIS, Adelaide had gone to change out of her dress, but the Doctor had given her a very reasonable reason why they didn't have time for that yet.

He would never tell her, but she looked beautiful.

Not that she didn't look beautiful always. Adelaide was always beautiful. He'd always thought so. Every time he looked at her he thought so. Every time he looked at her he wanted to be close to her but not...not that close. Just near, just touching, just embraced in her arms, just knowing she was close and knowing she wanted to be. But nothing like that. Nothing like the archery lesson Robin was giving Clara.

And while she did always look beautiful, he had to admit that seeing her in this different dress made her beauty even more noticeable.

He couldn't tell if she'd realized why he didn't want her to change – he honestly didn't put it past her – but she hadn't said anything. She hadn't even given any sign that she knew what was going on in her head.

Which did make him wonder, honestly...what did she think of him? He'd asked her, right after he'd regenerated, once everything had calmed down, and she'd told him that what was on the outside didn't matter. But she'd never said if she actually liked his new face or not.

He made a note to get her to tell him the truth, or as close to the truth as Adelaide's politeness would let her.

Clara kissed Robin's cheek before stepping back, giving the Time Lords a wave as she passed them on her way into the TARDIS. She'd also given them a knowing look, as though she knew something that they didn't, before vanishing.

Robin watched Clara walk away before turning to the Time Lords, stepping up to them. "So, is it true?"

"Is what true?"

"That in the future I am forgotten as a real man? I am but a legend?"

The Doctor had been quite upset that technically Adelaide had been proven right, as she'd said it was possible that there was a real person behind the legends. "I'm afraid it is."

Robin nodded. "Hmm...good. History is a burden. Stories can make us fly."

"I'm still having a little trouble believing yours, I'm afraid."

"Is it so hard to credit? That a man born into wealth and privilege should find the plight of the oppressed and weak too much to bear..." Robin exchanged a look with Adelaide. "Until one night, he is moved to steal a TARDIS? Fly among the stars, fighting the good fight." The Doctor's eyes widened. "Clara told me your stories."

"She should not have told you any of that."

He shrugged. "Well, well, once the story started, she could hardly stop herself." He looked at Adelaide again. "You, alone among your people, took to the universe to search for knowledge. A noble cause of your own, my lady. You're both her heroes, I think."

Adelaide shook her head. "We're not heroes." The Doctor, perhaps, the Doctor could be a hero. But not her. Never her.

"Well, neither am I. But if we all keep pretending to be...perhaps others will be heroes in our name. Perhaps we will all be stories. And may those stories never end." He held out his hand, shaking the Doctor's hand before Adelaide's. And while his words seemed to comfort the Doctor slightly, it did not Adelaide. "Goodbye, Doctor and Adelaide, Time Lords of Gallifrey."

"Goodbye, Robin Hood, Earl of Loxley."

Robin grinned. "And remember, I'm just as real as you are." He gave them a wink, stepping back into a bow.

The Time Lords nodded, turning to enter the TARDIS where Clara was waiting. "Admit it," Clara called. "You like him."

"Well," the Doctor shrugged, "we're leaving him a present, aren't we?"

"Did Adelaide make you?"

"It was my idea, I'll have you know!"

Clara just laughed.

A/N: A happy ending to what has turned out to be a happy episode. These Time Lords certainly deserve a period of calm :)