Chapter 20

Nothing I've Ever Known

Instant flashes of everything Spirit had done since his arrival in the village rushed to my mind.

That look he gave me the first time we met, his playful nickering when he tried to impress me the next morning, his surprising obedience while we were tied together and I led the way... his blazing gaze always so warmly fixed on me. The unbelievable fact that he had done the impossible and jumped the high fence of his confinement just to save me from Great Conquest! Another shocking fact that he had chosen to stay in the village when he could've gone back to his homeland. The way he said that it was all for...me. The way his expressive eyes lit up every time I smiled at him. His curiosity and willingness to learn about the two-leggeds just because I was so close to them. The way his heart sank every time I acted indifferent and cool towards him. And finally how anguished and hurt he was when I had decided to go to Great Conquest.

All this because of me.

This wild stallion had put me before everything and anything else that was so important and dear in his life. And yet, I couldn't realize it until now...until he himself confessed it all loud and clear. This was love. He loved me!

How could I've been so clueless? So blind?! Why couldn't I understand sooner how sincerely and hopelessly in love he was? Who else sacrificed so much for my sakes? Certainly not Great Conquest or other stallions of this village! And even Little Creek...not even my sweet, and loving owner had done so much for me as much as Spirit had done in such a short period of time.

I became angry with myself for being so indifferent! I always knew that Spirit found me attractive...I mean, come on. Which stallion wouldn't? It's in their nature to impress mares and populate. But this was so much more than that.

This was not a natural instinct or even a mere infatuation. This was true love.

Ugh, shut up, Rain! What do you know about true love? You managed to prove how clueless you are pretty well so far, haven't you?!

While I battled with my deep, inner emotions, Spirit seemed to be regretting what he had said. Obviously, blurting out his true feelings so angrily wasn't his ideal choice. But he needed to get it out after keeping them bottled up for so long.

Taking a deep breath, the stallion collected himself and nickered calmly. "It doesn't matter. Nothing matters anymore. I'm going home and you go back to your war stud." He stated in determination.

My heart skipped a beat at this and I snapped back to reality. No! He couldn't leave...not after everything he told me. I found myself not wanting to let him go. Ever. Maybe it sounded selfish on my part, but this wasn't fair. I was just now realizing how much he had meant to me as well. Over the past few weeks, I had felt so confused about my feelings. No matter how hard I tried to shake him off, I always thought back to him...always Spirit. Why? I couldn't understand it... till now.

Gaining courage about my newfound feelings, I decided to say the truth. "Great Conquest and I can't get together..."

That seemed to slightly catch Spirit's attention as he raised his brows curiously. "How come?" He asked, half honestly and half teasingly.

"How can I be with someone I have no feelings for?"

Spirit rolled his eyes at this, shaking his head and snorting in annoyance. "I don't know. You're the expert in that field, why ask me?" He said sarcastically.

"What I mean is..." I began slowly again, still feeling nervous about how new and surprising all this was for me. "He is great and all, his my friend, we've always been so close-"

Okay now Spirit was bored, he really didn't feel like hearing how much affection I had for a stallion who never failed to ruin his day. "I don't want to hear it, Rain." He cut in sternly.

"You have to!" I argued with my ears pinned back, frustrated that he wouldn't let me finish.

Spirit stopped, clearly not expecting me to snap like this.

Taking a deep exhale, I moved closer to the fence as he observed me quietly. "We couldn't be together because of you. He believes I have feelings for..you." I finished, looking sheepishly sideways, with a hint of nervousness. This was the hardest, most uncertain thing I had ever said. But how could I deny all these consuming emotions I had whenever I was with Spirit?

The dun stallion's eyes widened in surprise, and I could detect a small smile of happiness dancing around his muzzle. Unlike myself, he didn't require a lot of explanations. He quickly perceived what this meant. His previously frustrated and angered expressions changed. It softened, as his eyes began to sparkle with passion. Smiling tenderly, Spirit walked up to the wooden bars, closer to me.

"Rain," he whispered softly. "stay here tonight...stay with me." Reaching out from the fence, Spirit gently pressed his forehead against mine. I could feel his warm breath on my face, as I relaxed and sighed deeply. Even if I wanted to leave, (which I didn't obviously) my legs were rooted in that place. It was so wonderful to be near him. How could I not realize sooner just how much I loved being close to him? And if it weren't for this stupid, wooden railing, we could've been much more closer.

Nodding with a soft nicker of approval, I made up my mind to stay with him. Our eyes met, as Spirit's gaze lingered. Feeling bit more confident, Spirit sweetly stroked my cheek with his, and I didn't shy away from his touch. My feelings and emotions had rocketed since he admitted the way he felt about me. Did he know that I had found him as gorgeous as the night sky with a full moon, or an autumn eve that burned like the sun?

Thus we remained and stayed together in this strangely beautiful night. I was happy that it was in the company of such a fascinating stallion, that made my heart leap every time he looked at me.

The morning sunshine came, bringing the chirping sounds of birds along. I slowly awoke, flattering my long lashes, my sleepy eyes squinted due to the new sunlight. It had been a while since I slept so soundly and peacefully.

"Morning" Spirit greeted with gentle nicker, his jet, black forelock covering the side of his handsome face.

"How long have you been up?" I asked, with a soft smile tucking my lips.

"I'm used to rising with the sun." Spirit smirked with a playful wink. There it was again..his cocky and incredibly charming smirk, that somehow managed to make my heart soar.

I responded with a timid smile, still feeling completely overwhelmed with everything that was happening between the two of us. But I was liking it...I didn't want this feeling to ever go away. It was nothing I've ever known before.

Spirit's eyes were alight with gleam as he held my gaze for a second or two. "I wish I wasn't in this pen right now." He admitted, disappointment written all over his countenance.

"Meaning?" I decided to tease, my blue eyes sparkling with mischief.

"You know what I mean mare," Spirit smiled softly, as my chest pounded with the sudden touch of his gentle nuzzle. What was this feeling? And why couldn't this last forever?

As expected, the precious moment was interrupted between us, when a familiar sharp whistle reached my ears. Little Creek! He was calling for me. I quickly slipped out of my dream-like state. It was time to get back to reality! I had forgotten about my human. How did that happen? What are you doing to me, Spirit?

Turning promptly, I started to quickly trot towards him but Spirit's loud neigh stopped me.

"Rain!" He called, with his star-struck eyes. "Will I see you again?" He reared anxiously.

I couldn't retain a smile. "Of course, you will." I grinned brightly at the lovesick stallion and loped over to my human companion.

What was he doing to me? How could I become so distracted with Spirit that I even forgot my Little Creek? Nothing I've ever known had made me feel this way. Nothing.