Katsuki sat behind his desk, his head leaning on his hand as his eyes kept drooping. So far he had managed to get up and get his ass to school every single day thanks to Ejiro, but that didn't mean that every day wasn't a battle.
Being around people was draining and during lunchbreak he would prefer to stay in the classroom to eat his bento rather than mix in with the rest of his class in the cafeteria. It secluded him even more than before, but he didn't really mind.
Ejiro had, of course, offered to stay with Katsuki during break, but after Katsuki tried to explain how full his mind got and how exhausting it was, Ejiro decided to let him be and went to eat with his classmates instead.
The end of class bell rung and it was time for their break again. Everyone stood up, making a racket as chairs were shoved backwards and things fell to the floor. Every single sound was putting Katsuki more on edge. He grit his teeth as he tried to keep it together. He had been doing so well, not to have any outbursts for the past two weeks, but sometimes it was really hard not to snap at someone.
Ejiro looked back one last time, smiling softly as he saw Katsuki rummaging through his bag to get his food. Katsuki watched as Ejiro closed the door behind him, nobody else really questioning why Katsuki stayed behind anymore.
He stared out the window. The sky was clear, but as it was already starting to become fall, it was darker than usual. It gave off a depressing atmosphere that didn't really help much for Katsuki's mood.
He opened his bento box, seeing that it was filled with spicy flavored rice, omelet and a piece of steak. He smiled a little. His mom was really bad at showing that she cared, but it was noticeable through the little things she did, like making his favorite food.
He picked up the steak and bit into it, the juice running down his chin. He wiped it away with the cuff of his sleeve, cursing himself quickly after. Now he would have to get it cleaned…
His attention was diverted as the door to the class slid open again. He looked up to see Uraraka looking around, her eyebrows rising as she noticed him sitting there.
'Why are you here on your own?' she asked as she closed the door behind her, walking further into the class, still looking around.
'I'm eating,' Katsuki replied curtly. Uraraka glanced back at him. 'Yeah, I can see that. Wouldn't you rather be with everyone else?'
She stalked over to her desk, looking beside it, in it and under it, apparently not finding what she was looking for. Katsuki glanced down as he put some of the rice in his mouth. 'They're too busy.'
Uraraka hummed. 'I see.' She seemed distracted, not really paying attention to the conversation. Katsuki raised an eyebrow as she started searching the classroom.
'Looking for something?' Katsuki smirked, making her jump a little. She scratched her head, her face flushing red. 'Nothing important. I just lost my wallet… I noticed in the cafeteria when I tried to buy food.'
Katsuki sighed and then ignored her, going on to focus back on eating. He couldn't focus, though, with all the sounds of chairs being shoved backwards and her being in close proximity all the time, looking for her wallet.
He grit his teeth and then shoved his chair back. 'If you need money, you could just say so,' he said as he stalked over to her, shoving some notes into her hands. He returned to his seat after, all the while grumbling to himself.
Uraraka blinked a couple of times as she stared at him. Then she calmly walked over to him, putting the money on his desk and pulling up a chair to sit in front of him.
His gaze flickered up at her, severely questioning her sanity. 'You just said you needed money to eat, right? Why are you giving this back?'
She looked out the window as she spoke. 'I don't like taking money from anyone. I need to have worked for it, or else it feels bad to spend it.' She glances over at Katsuki, who is silently staring at her.
'It's okay!' she exclaims, waving her hands around. 'I don't need to eat that bad.'
Katsuki looks down at his half eaten bento, then out the window and then back at the empty classroom. He shoves another piece of omelet into his mouth before placing the chopsticks down and shoving the box over to Uraraka. He then turns around, huffing. 'You can't train with an empty stomach.'
Uraraka opens her mouth to protest, but when she notices Katsuki's expression as he's looking away, she knows she can't refuse. She slides the box over to her and happily starts munching on the leftover omelet and rice.
'I noticed you haven't messaged me yet.'
Katsuki looks back at her. He rolls his eyes. 'I didn't need it.'
She swallows and then puts the empty box back on the desk. Katsuki is surprised she's such a fast eater. Maybe he just became very slow. 'Looks to me like you do,' she responds, looking at him.
Katsuki reaches out and puts the lid back on the box, shoving it back in his bag. 'Who are you to tell me whether or not I need you? I already have Kirishima, that's enough.'
Her eyebrows knit together as she brings her finger to her mouth, apparently pondering. 'I don't think one friend is enough. You can't always rely on someone to be there for you. If you have more friends, then there's always someone you can rely on.'
Katsuki glances over at her, unamused at the turn of events. 'If you're done eating, get back to the cafeteria.'
She shakes her head defiantly, her lower lip slightly pushed out. 'Break is almost over anyways.'
Katsuki bends down to take some things out of his bag, trying to ignore her. He doesn't mind her presence, but she's prying too much and he isn't feeling any of that.
He opens his textbook and starts on his homework for tomorrow. A hand waving in front of his face makes him lose focus. He grinds his teeth together in frustration as he looks up. Uraraka's face is inches from his, her eyebrows knit together in a frown and her lips pursed.
'Look, I know you don't want to talk about it, but I think it would really help you to get it off your chest. I'm not going to force you, but I'm here if you need me.'
Katsuki stares at her. In less than a week she has shown deviant behavior twice and Katsuki is both impressed and taken aback by this turn of events. Katsuki clicks his tongue.
'Yeah, you already told me that.'
Uraraka isn't done yet, but the door to the classroom slides open as the rest of the class floods back in. She pouts as she has to give in and goes back to her own desk.
During the rest of their classes she can't help but stare at Katsuki's back. She can see he's struggling to stay awake and the way he writes his notes is sloppy.
She sighs. She won't push any further if he doesn't want to, but she is so sure she could help him. It hurts her that he's refusing her help so much, but there's simply nothing she can do.
She turns back to her own textbook, her mind wandering as the rest of the day goes by.
Uraraka is standing outside the classroom, tapping her foot impatiently. The end of day bell has already rung ten minutes ago and yet they still haven't come out.
A blur of white, green, red and blond passes her and immediately catches her attention.
She jogs to catch up with them, greeting them happily. Ejiro's raises his eyebrows in surprise.
'Uraraka? Why are you still around?' he asks.
She smiles at him. 'I thought I'd talk some with you about our new training regimen. It's pretty tough, don't you think?'
Katsuki's gaze flickers over as Ejiro turns away from him to talk to Uraraka. It bothers him.
'Yeah, they really upped it. It's hard to keep up, but I know we can do it!' Ejiro responds. 'What do you think, Katsuki?'
Uraraka tilts her head to the side. 'You're allowed to call him by his first name?'
Ejiro turns back to Uraraka, his face flushing red. 'Y-yeah! It's because we're great friends and all and I let him call me by my first name too, so it isn't really that big a deal.'
Uraraka looks past Ejiro to Katsuki and notices that his gaze is averted. She wonders if the whole conversation is bothering him.
'So, can I call you Ejiro then?' she asks, her eyes sparkling.
Ejiro looks taken aback at the sudden question. Calling someone by their first name is quite intimate and so far both he and Katsuki had it reserved for their family and the both of them.
Ejiro glanced over at Katsuki to see his reaction. He didn't want to do anything that upset his friend.
'I-I guess?' Ejiro replies as he scratches his head, grinning widely.
'That's settled then!' Uraraka replies. 'And you. Can I call you Katsuki?'
This finally pulls Katsuki's attention back to them. 'Heh? Why?'
Uraraka shrugs. 'I just think it sounds nicer than Bakugou. And first names are more personal than family names. I'd prefer to use them all the time if I could!'
Katsuki clicks his tongue. 'If that's so, then what should I call you? Ochako?' It sounded weird to him to say that name. He had barely ever used anyone's first name in his life. He had never even used Izuku's real name.
'Yeah, sounds good to me!' she replies, smiling widely. 'You can change my name to that in LINE if you want.'
This makes Ejiro glance over, raising an eyebrow. 'You have her on LINE too? I thought I was the only one.'
Katsuki notices that he's slightly pouting. Is he truly upset that he isn't the only contact in his phone anymore?
'It was not voluntary,' Katsuki replies, sounding rather uninterested. He doesn't know what Ochako was trying to do and frankly, he did not like it at all.
'Ah, I have to go the other way here,' Ochako says as they reach an intersection near the train station. She opens her arms wide and goes to hug Ejiro. He looks rather awkward in the embrace.
Then she turns to Katsuki, her arms still wide open, smiling softly. Katsuki rolls his eyes and turns away.
Her face falls a little before smiling widely again. 'Maybe some other time,' she says.
Katsuki huffs. As if.
'See you Monday!' she says, waving as she turns around towards her own home.
Ejiro and Katsuki turn on their heels, heading the other way.
'She seems nice,' Ejiro says after a moment of silence.
'I don't care for it,' Katsuki instantly responds.
Ejiro looks over at him, a worried look on his face. 'Why not? I don't think she has any bad intentions.'
Katsuki shrugs. 'I just don't like the way she is acting. She's behaving like I'm fragile. You know what she said to me during lunch?'
'You let her eat lunch with you?' Ejiro feels slightly offended. Katsuki immediately sets him straight.
'She came to me and wouldn't leave me alone. Anyways, she said that I would need more than one friend to rely on.'
Ejiro looks up at the sky, his hands behind his head, his fingers intertwined. 'I guess she does have a point.'
Katsuki raises an eyebrow at him. 'Well, I can't always be there for you. Like last week, after you passed out. I so badly wanted to be there for you, but I just couldn't.'
'Your grandma's funeral is more important than me passing out from my own stupidity,' Katsuki retorts.
Ejiro chuckles. 'Yeah, probably, but it doesn't change the fact that she's right that you need more than one person to rely on. I can't always be there for you and it would probably be better if you got more friends.'
Anger started to burble inside of Katsuki. How on Earth could he agree with her? It made no sense of her to force herself on him so much! It was frustrating and annoying and he didn't want any of it.
'Who the fuck says I want more friends?' he snapped, finally breaking. Ejiro's face falls instantly, looking at Katsuki with wide eyes.
'I never even asked you to be my friend, did I? You forced yourself on me too and one pushy person is more than enough. Even more than I wanted. I did fine on my own.'
Ejiro remains silent as the flame inside of Katsuki's chest grows even more. He balls his hands into fists, making sure that no explosions will go off.
After a silence that goes on longer than Katsuki is used to, he looks aside. His anger immediately subsides as he sees Ejiro's lower lip tremble. 'Fuck,' Katsuki mutters.
'Ejiro,' he says, louder.
Ejiro shakes his head. 'No, it's okay. You're right.'
Katsuki suddenly feels extremely bad. 'I didn't mean that,' he says.
Ejiro stops in his track and Katsuki turns around to look at him. 'You are right. I've been pushing myself onto you. I'll stop.'
'I don't mind,' Katsuki tries, but Ejiro isn't listening.
'I'll pick you up Monday, though. Don't be late.' Ejiro turns on his heel, wiping away the tears at the corners of his eyes.
Katsuki didn't mean to do this. He grips his own hair. Why is he like this? He doesn't know.
He turns to walk the rest of the way to home, hating himself all the while. Every time he tries to make things better, he fucks up yet again. It's a vicious circle he can't end.
He plunges down on the couch in his living room, turning on the television but not paying attention. Instead he takes out his phone and opens LINE.
His fingers move on their own as his mind is blank. Only after he's pressed send he finally realizes what he just said.
Can you come over? We need to talk – Katsuki.
I'm sorry for the late update! Okay quick update on my social life:
- I have started a new job, leaving me with two jobs which severely limits my time to write
- I also have school which is also taking up my time
- It's December so yay! Lots of birthdays (including my own) and other celebrations surrounding the holidays
- I have winter depression. Sounds worse than it is, but basically I have less energy and inspiration and writing just becomes a hassle sometimes
This does not mean that I'm not trying! I love this story and I am finishing this! I'm working very hard to update every week but sometimes I might skip a week or update later than usual.
So that's enough about me ^_^ Hope to see you next chapter!