The word trial is an interesting one. It has many different contexts and meanings, as well as many different synonyms and antonyms. A trial could be a difficult thing that no one wants to deal with, such as bankruptcy or taxes. A trial could be a test, like getting your driver's license or passing the upcoming exams that you should be studying for. A trial sounds similar to a trail, which is a dirt pat in the middle of trees that you might use to evade the law.
Well, the last definition of trial could be a legal court procedure, involving convicting a person of innocence or not, and possibly arresting them for committing crimes.
It was 11:00AM, in the lobby of Hotel Denouement, when the podium was set up. Justice Strauss called the meeting to order, as everyone in the Hotel wandered into the room blindfolded.
"You may remove your blindfolds." Justice Strauss announced, to many's confusion, a word here meaning 'Perplexed as to why they had to walk all the way here with them only to take them off'.
"But we just put them on." Duncan pointed out.
"Don't be silly, Mr. Quagmire. Justice may be blind, but the High Court ruled the evidence must be seen to be believed. You will put the blindfolds back on for the verdict." Justice Strauss explained, but Duncan seemed even more confused.
"That doesn't make any sense…"
"All rise for the High Court judges, myself and my esteemed colleagues." Announced the judge, everyone standing up. Quigley turned around only to see the other two judges were all the way up on the sixth floor, over watching everything.
"Why are they so high up?" Quigley asked, suspicious, his hand slowly reaching for his own spyglass. Kit had given him and each of his siblings one before they left, alongside commonplace books.
"The High Court ruled to interpret their name literally." Justice Strauss said, but Quigley was still suspicious. "You may sit. Bring in Count Olaf!"
"Please hold the applause!" The count said, being let out the broom closet, throwing a makeshift noose onto the ground. The entire crowd started with scattered clapping, some not sure if they should clap or not.
"No, don't clap for him! This is a courtroom, not a theater!"
"I thought this was a hotel."
"I thought it was a hotel acting in the role of a courtroom."
"I thought this was a courtroom inside a hotel."
"I thought I saw my mother!"
"Thanks to the efforts of many concerned parties and a banker, I have compiled a comprehensive file on the Baudelaire case. I submit to the Court The Complete History of Injustice or Odious Lusting After Fortunes." Said Justice Strauss, holding the huge leather bound book for all to see.
"I titled it myself." Mr. Poe announced, proudly.
"The judges will now hear this case, while the authorities wait outside to apprehend any guilty party who tries to escape." Said Justice Strauss, before adding, "I call our first witnesses. That's you, Baudelaires."
The three children looked at each other. I hope you have not been a witness, plaintiff, or defendant to many court hearings in your life, but if you have, you know the first time is quite unsettling, as everything feels almost… wrong, like the sound of the grand clock of Hotel Denouement.
The three children walked up to the stands, and each took a seat.
"Please state your names and occupation. We know them, of course. It's just standard procedure."
"Violet Baudelaire, inventor."
"Klaus Baudelaire, researcher.
"I object!" cried the count. "Their proper occupation is orphan, or inheritor of a large fortune."
"Your objection is noted," Justice Strauss sighed, "though I caution the defendant about speaking out of turn. Baudelaires, you have traveled a great distance and suffered a great deal, but you're finally safe, among friends and associates, classmates and co-workers, faculty members and countless neighbors, reporters, theatergoers, fashionistas, doctors, nurses, carnival guests, mountain climbers, telegraph operators, and deep-sea divers. They have been watching you all along the way and are prepared to speak out on your behalf, but the most important testimony is yours. Go on, Baudelaires. Tell us your story. This time, we promise to listen."
Violet paused, before looking at Klaus, who looked at Sunny, who was looking at Violet.
"It all started on Briny Beach, when Mr. Poe informed us of the terrible fire that killed our parents." Violet started.
"We were put into the so-called care of Count Olaf, where he tried to marry Violet." Klaus said.
The two were speaking rapid fire by now.
"He struck Klaus across the face."
"He put Sunny in a cage."
"He murdered Montgomery Montgomery."
"And Josephine Anwhistle."
"He hypnotized Klaus, and tried to kill Charles from Lucky Smells Lumbermill."
"He kidnapped the Quagmires!"
"He conspired with Esme Squalor!"
"He murdered Jacques Snicket, a brave and noble man..."
"He framed us, and tried to burn us at the stake."
"He posed as a doctor! And tried to cut off Violet's head!"
"He murdered Olivia Caliban… a brave and noble volunteer who only joined to stop Count Olaf in the first place!"
"He kidnapped Sunny!"
"He murdered Larry Your-Waiter, and posed as Jacques Snicket!"
There was a breath of silence, as the Baudelaires caught their breath.
"We lost everything." Klaus said slowly.
"Except each other." Violet added.
"We survived because we believed that one day we'd find a safe place. Where people would listen to us." Klaus said, fed up with the injustice of the world.
"And believe us. We've suffered so much, but the root of our suffering is one man." Violet said slowly.
"That man is Count Olaf." Klaus said, with a violence in his voice.
"This world won't be quiet or safe until he's behind bars." Violet said in a similar tone.
"And all decent people have their day in court." Klaus ended, glaring at the living maker of misery.
"Thank you." The two said in sync.
"Thank you, Baudelaires. We are grateful for your courage. You may step down now. I had planned to call other witnesses, but your testimony was so compelling, I hate to waste another second. I'm going to consult with my fellow judges, and if they agree, we can declare these unfortunate events over at last." Justice Strauss, calmly.
There was a small sigh of relief. Olaf merely smirked, while almost everyone watched the Baudelaires intently — parring one person in the lobby.
Quigley suddenly gasped. He was swivelled in his seat, facing the other two judges. He had his spyglass out, and as soon as he gasped, the two judges started moving.
"The other two judges, the High Court… They work with Count Olaf!" Quigley exclaimed, and suddenly Olaf's calm demeanour made sense.
"W-what?" Justice Strauss asked, perplexed, a word here meaning 'in doubt of her fellow judges'. "I've known them for years… every time I've brought up the Baudelaire case they seem interested…"
"Because they're on MY side of the schism, you fool!" Olaf laughed in triumph, moving for the entrance and engaging in combat with Frank, unless of course it was Dewey. Meanwhile, Duncan and Isadora bolted to beside the elevator for some unknown reason, a phrase here meaning 'the two triplets knew each other well enough to know what the other was thinking'.
Out of the elevator, stepped the two judges with their aura of menace. They took two steps before the triplets hit them upside the head with their spy glasses. The two villains fell, and Olaf paled greatly.
He pushed down Frank-or-Dewey Denouement, trying to flee, only to be intercepted by Dewey-or-Frank Denouement. Olaf tried to fight this Denouement while the first one came in and knocked him down with his own spyglass.
Olaf collapsed, and as the judges were wrangled up and handcuffed by justices and volunteers alike, the world seemed quiet. If only for a moment.
This trial was both troublesome and legal, but at last, that's how the story can go.