Kenzi was downstairs eating cereal.
While she was happy that Tamsin and Bo were getting their way back together, she needed to have a talk with Bo. Tamsin was her daughter and was really protective of her. What Bo yelled to everyone in the clinic was what she was fixated on, 'It's just so fucking EASY for you to go experimenting on Tamsin. Hasn't she paid ENOUGH because of my thoughtless actions?!'
Bo admitted to her callus actions and she did respect that about Bo. Her bestie was not only unafraid to tell the truth but act and correct for it accordingly.
The most glaring and damning statement that bothered Kenzi was the fact that Bo asserted that Lauren was experimenting on Tamsin. While it was over exaggerated, it had to have a ring of truth to it.
Kenzi realized that when it came to Bo, people would move heaven and earth to be by her side but was it even at the expense of others? Did Lauren make a sound medical decision when she wanted to prepare a pain kill and sedative for Tamsin?
Probably. Kenzi found no fault in Lauren's logic. Bo was just revived and had Lauren told Bo not to think about Tamsin would be effort to futility. It would be like being at a buffet and be told not to think about food. Tamsin was screaming bloody murder in Bo's arms after all. The best Lauren could do was to prepare a sedative and pain killer for Tamsin.
So WHO, Kenzi mused, was Bo referring to when she yelled at Lauren to stop 'experimenting' on Tamsin?
Kenzi then heard Bo come down the steps. She was in a robe which covered her night wear and seemed happy.
'WAIT,' Kenzi thought, 'Tamsin was an early riser unless she was drunk the night before OR ... OMG!'
Bo was REFERRING to herself? Was she the one experimenting on Tamsin? HER DAUGTHER!
"Hey Kenz," Bo said in a cheery voice pulling out a bowl to get some cereal. She then pulled out another bowl and proceeded to fill it with half Captain Crunch and Half Lucky Charms.
Kenzi couldn't believe this. Bo shagged Tamsin and Tamsin probably don't want to be a part of it. How did she know? Tamsin told her so and her stance on sex with Bo was crystal clear.
Kenzi normally held a light hearted mood but this time she scowled and was angry, "Bo! You had SEX with TAMMY!"
Bo was taken back. She never saw Kenzi mad at her.
"Now Kenzi calm down. We did have sex Kenz," Bo put out her hands to keep things cool. "Tamsin showed up in my room during the storm and we just say together. OK."
"Bo!" Kenzi sternly commanded snapping out her index finger towards Bo. "DON'T play your BFF ok? DON'T."
Bo frowned and knew Kenzi just busted her.
"I want to know WHAT you did to T-sam last night or this morning that has you floating on cloud 9. NOT what you didn't do," Kenzi leaned in and gave her best friend and sister for once a death stare. Kenzi put up with Bo alot but this was crossing the line.
Bo was at a loss for words. How was she supposed to explain what she theoretically didn't do but did?
Kenzi took deep breaths and knew Bo was thinking about HOW to explain something as oppose to flat out lying to her.
"Just spit it out Bo. I sorry I got upset at you. T-sam is my friend and daughter. I... I just expected more ya know? Be we all have faults and I need to grant that to you. Now please, tell the Kenzi-nator what happened," Kenzi explained backing off.
Bo looked down and stopped she was doing and slowly relayed the entire chain of events.
"I couldn't sleep last night through the thunder storms and I was just up thinking about her. Tamsin came over to comfort me. We slept together, FULLY CLOTHED and we.. we didn't dance."
Bo paused since she knew this was going to get tricky.
Kenzi just put her hands on Bo's to show she was still there for her.
Bo looked at her hands and confessed, "Tamsin yelled at me when you left us after the movie and told me that although she was here for me, she would never be into me again like she was before. That really hurt Kenz. So... so this morning while she was I think using the link to talk to another Valkyrie, I guess Arin, I pretended to be in deep sleep while I... I... I'm sorry Kenzi. She didn't deserve that but I needed to know."
Kenzi was mad but had to confirm that happened so she just completed, "So you made Tamsin see the stars with the help of your errant sleep walking hands?"
Bo nodded.
Kenzi dug deep down to stay in both Tamsin's and Bo's corner but finally blurted out, "You frackin raped my Tammers Bo."
Bo immediately when defensive and pulled her hands back from Kenzi. "It's not like that. She didn't give me any signals to stop. I needed to know if she still LOVED me and if I had a chance."
"Bo bear! LISTEN to yourself. I move away and this place goes to crap. Did you EVER think that Tamsin LOVES you by the sheer fact she returned and is spending TIME with you AFTER you burned her. Love and Sex are 2 very different things. You just proved that Tamsin has the hots for you. In no way did LOVE come into it Bo," Kenzi admonished as gently.
Bo looked away and to the floor. Kenzi was right. It was selfish of her. Really selfish. "I'm ... I'm sorry Kenz. I just wanted things back the way they were and I just jumped the gun. I just wanted her... so badly. Can you forgive me?"
Kenzi looked to Bo and said, "Of course I do Bo. Just keep in mind some things you CAN'T rush. I know you got the succu-charms, but love that last is built on a solid foundation. She came back and is giving you another chance. You don't owe me an apology. You owe Tamsin one BIG time."
Bo just nodded and knew what she had to do and walked to the stairs to her room. Kenzi grabbed her arm and just said, "Remember, even if she gets mad at you and ends distancing herself from you. She'll come back ok? Just give her space and time. At least you demonstrated that she can trust you to tell her the truth."
Kenzi got up and hugged Bo, "Come here you. You know I love you right? I can't stay all the time to keep you guys on track, but I KNOW you can do it. You're my succu-charmer and my only sister ok?"
"I just hope she can forgive me," Bo broke the hug and went up stairs.
Tamsin was still sleeping blissfully in her bed and Bo just sat down silently next to her not knowing what to say.
Tamsin had one of the most blissful rests ever but felt someone watching her. She slowly opened her eyes remembering that she just reached the stars at Bo's hands earlier.
It was odd for Tamsin looking at Bo sitting in front of her. Bo had the guiltiest expression ever. WHY? It was like she regretted something. Like Bo cheated on someone.
'OH CRAP! Bo wasn't asleep. She just made me reach the stars and is feeling guilty about it,' Tamsin quickly deduced.
What to do about it was the question.
Tamsin snarled slightly and questioned Bo, "You were WIDE awake when you took me this morning, weren't you."
Bo just put her hand on her face and with regret squeaked out, "I'm sorry Tamsin. Yes."
Tamsin was caught in a whirl wind of complex emotions. She HATED that Bo just made her crest against her will. She HATED that Bo USED her. She HATED that Bo had that control over her. The audacity that she can just get anything she wants pushed her over the edge.
Tamsin grabbed Bo and yanked her forcefully into the bed next to her and straddled her.
Before Tamsin knew that she was doing she slapped Bo across the face yelling, "How DARE you take advantage of me SLUT!"
Bo felt the pain in her jaw and was about to use her charms but stopped since she deserved this. She also learned from Arin that charming would lead to bigger consequences: One that she wasn't willing to pay for again. It was then she remembered that she didn't have use of her powers anyway.
"I'm SORRY Tamsin. Please... I"
SLAP!
Tamsin grabbed her by her robe, pulled her up to face her then yelled into her face, "You just TAKE TAKE TAKE! I give an inch and you take a fucking MILE. You bitch!"
"It was horrible of me... Tammy pleas..."
SLAP!
Bo got hit so hard she was dizzy and instead of resisting and blocking she bravely turned to face her persecutor head on. This was the price of her penance for screwing Tamsin over.
Kenzi was torn peeking in. Tamsin hit Bo so hard in the face on that last one even she felt it. If it got worse, she'd have to separate them but for now she needed them to work it out just a little longer.
Tamsin saw Bo turn to face her and didn't even bother to resist. Bo looked a little battered with blood coming from nose. Her teary eye's showed regret. It was as if Bo was willing to taking her lumps but Tamsin was really upset at the whole turn of events. She was BOUND to Bo. Bo did this to her and she had so much pent up anger because of all the physical pain she endured through the link she back hand slapped Bo strongly.
Bo didn't even know what hit her.
Tamsin then realized, to her horror, that Bo was unconscious.
"Oh SHIT!" Tamsin whispered with tears coming out of her eyes tapping Bo's face lightly to get her conscious again.
A moment later Bo came to in a world of hurt with a Valkyrie still straddling her in tears.
Bo just mumbled, "Tammy, I'm so effing sorry for taking advantage... no raping you. Please ... I want to know if you were still into me. It was the wrong way to go about it."
Tamsin just yelled at Bo, "Ya think! You HURT me Bo and you KEEP doing it! I'm partially bonded to you and YOU can't stop thinking about me! You want me but you don't. You love me, but you don't! I use to look up to you and NOW look at me. I'll a freaking mess. I can't even go back to my old life bitch!"
Bo just stayed silent but tears kept streaking down her face. She then wiped the blood away from her nose.
"I am yours but I don't know if I CAN love you again! Worst of all, you won't forget about me! I can't go forward, I can't go back. You stupid succubus, you've got me TRAPPED!" Tamsin yelled and looked away.
"Sorry," Bo whispered and bit her bottom lip. She tasted blood and it was hers. She was at a loss for words.
Tamsin began to weep profusely and just stammered out, "Is... is that how... how you want me? A caged animal that b... bends to your every whim? Am I just some trophy for .. for you?"
"No Tammy," Bo said calmly stroking Tamsin's cheek. "I do care about you. I want you to be with you. I love you. Please."
"Then WHY do y... you insist on hurting me, because that's not love," Tamsin asked still crying.
Bo sat up and looked to the floor and moped in shame. Here she got Tamsin back only to do her a yet another disservice.
Tamsin finally dismounted Bo and sat at the edge of the bed and dried her tears. She finally said, "You clipped my wings Bo. Granted I was dumb enough to fall for your wiles, but you knew better. That night you told me that we had to talk, you handled my heart so callously, even for a friend. I thought you more than a succubus: More than your species. Am I wrong?"
"No. I do love you and that is why I keep thinking about you. I... I don't want to make excuses but my succubus side sometimes gets in the way. I know better and Tamsin, they are just excuses and I've been really selfish. Tamsin?" Bo looked to a defeated Valkyrie sliding next to her.
"Yes," Tamsin droned out not even looked to Bo.
There was a long pause and finally Tamsin looked over to Bo with a brow raised.
"Can we do something that will lessen the hurt of the bond?" Bo asked trying to get a solution.
"Well, the bond lets me know when you miss, need me or are in danger. Which is all the time," Tamsin clicked sarcastically.
Bo just quipped and admonished, "PLEASE Tamsin. I'm trying to communicate and fix this OK? Just for 5 minutes, cut the sarcastic BS. I'm trying to build something that WE can live with and here you are shooting it down before I even start."
Tamsin knew Bo was right and finally closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths. Finally she nodded but confirmed, "5 Minutes."
"Thanks Tammy," Bo smiled.
Tamsin growled.
"I mean Tamsin," Bo corrected.
Tamsin smirked tightly and wanted to say something sarcastic but stopped herself.
"OK. Tamsin, the reason WHY I keep thinking about you revolves around the fact that I may lose you. I also miss you... a lot," Bo started off carefully.
Tamsin just let her continue. Bo was trying to come clean and it was needed for them to get out of being stuck in some sort of limbo of their own making.
Bo looked at Tamsin who was just paying full attention to her. She had a muted expression like she was trying to figure out where Bo was going. Bo continued, "I need to know, before I suggest a solution. Do you want me out of your life? Please Tamsin answer honestly because that affects the solution I propose."
Tamsin just stated sternly, "I want to know both options Bo. I can't make a choice if I don't know the paths you are suggesting."
Bo nodded and just solemnly replied, "ok."
"So if I decided to move on without you. What do you propose?" Tamsin asked looking into Bo's deep brown eyes. She needed to know if Bo was on the level.
"Tamsin, do you consider the happy sun shine gang your family excluding me," Bo asked with another question.
Tamsin looked up and thought, then replied, "Yea, they're not bad, I still have a beef with Lauren but for a human, she's not all bad. May she's a back sta... never mind. Sorry."
"Do you consider them more of a family than what you have in Valhalla?"
"Yes," Tamsin quickly responded. That was a no brainer.
"OK. If you don't want me anywhere in your life Tamsin, I will not take away your family. So you stay with Trick and the gang, and I will move back to my home town, away from all of you," Bo relayed in all seriousness. "In time, your memory will fade from me and well, then everyone else's too."
Tamsin just blurted out, "But Trick IS your family."
"Yea, but I was raised in that town and I know I can put roots down there again," Bo smirked knowing how hard that would be.
"Cut the BS. You won't be able to feed Bo," Tamsin retorted noticing the hole in her theory.
"Yes, I can. I will just feed from several humans without sucking them dry," Bo murmured.
"Emmm you can't remember? Did that bolt of lightning hit you too hard?" Tamsin stated. "Until Super Doc scalpel in the back Lewis comes up with a solution, you need to stay here."
"Yea, I'll find a way. Trust me," Bo reassured.
Tamsin huffed out a laugh, "So let me get this straight. You're will to estrange yourself from your real family, from the Fae world to live the life of a hermit. AKA a self imposed exile for me?"
Bo nodded.
"Isn't that kind of extreme Succubus? Once the bond is broken for a time, it won't just reform. Just come back after that and we'll keep our distance," Tamsin offered.
"First, if I come back with you still there, I will screw you over again somehow. But I don't want to get in between you and your family. If you don't want to see me ever again, then you won't," Bo concluded putting her hand on Tamsin's.
Tamsin will still trying to wrap her head around this and just mentioned, "But your grandfather..."
"Yes, I know. Tamsin, I have learned to say 'I love you' to your face too many times, but here I am sorry for all the crap I'm doing to you. LOVE is demonstrated in action and I love you enough to know that I took you for granted and I WILL fix it. ok?" Bo clarified.
It was touching to Tamsin that Bo was willing to go to that length to keep her happy. In this arrangement, Tamsin would hurt for a time, but would be able to live her final life free from Bo. She'd get everything and Bo would be the one who would pay until one of them died.
"Annnnnd the other option IF I choose to allow you back into my life," Tamsin asked with a strong emphasis on 'if'.
Bo smiled, "In order for me to stop yearning for you ... I need to tell you everything WITH the condition that you don't give me crap about it. I need to know you are listening to me and not judging me. That way I know no matter what, you have my back. So in return for me telling you things that I don't even tell Kenzi, I need you to be understanding and supportive me."
Bo bit her lower lip knowing that Tamsin was either going to be closer to her than ever before and have to accept her for all her faults as they stand now or be told to take a hike. She could do both, but needed to give Tamsin the choice since she had her chance the last time they had a serious talk when the lights were out.
Tamsin looked away and thought about this. She would get to know Bo in a way that no one else would or even could. Even if she slept with someone else, she'd know how Bo really felt. How? Because she'd tell her. Did she really want to know however? What if she turned out to be second place to Lauren or worse? On the plus side, she got to see Bo for who she really was.
It was a huge risk for Tamsin since her ego may get bruised.
Finally Tamsin replied, "Bo? Do you remember the time when the Ancients caused blackouts and you and I had our chat at the crack shack?"
"Yea," Bo look down at her feet knowing she was about to re-live one of the biggest mistakes she ever did to Tamsin.
"You cut me. It hurt more than anything else I experienced in all my life times. Not only that, you made me doubt everything I had learned about you, but more to the point. You made me question my entire life times worth of collective wisdom and experiences," Tamsin began. "I... I begged for your love Bo. When the lights came back on, I could see what I was doing: Begging for love from someone incapable of it. Some baby Fae who was severely flawed. No one EVER made me doubt myself but YOU sure did. No one EVER hurts me emotionally, but YOU did so willingly," Tamsin spat out with venom.
Bo just nodded looking away. She felt her eyes well up as she waited for the hammer to drop.
Tamsin paused and made sure Bo could not only hear but understand her.
"NEVER AGAIN. I won't allow you to hurt me ever again and nor will I be willing to SHARE myself with a thoughtless narcissistic succubus," Tamsin decreed adamantly. "Bo, when we are together now, all we seem to do is hurt one another and neither of us wants that."
Bo shrunk down and now knew Tamsin's ultimate choice. Tamsin wanted her gone but chose to listen to her since that was one thing Bo was bad at.
Tamsin paused for a long time and knew Bo was feeling the pressure.
Bo, in utter ruins made a choice since Tamsin was stuck. She needed to not only be brave, but follow through.
Bo got up and nodded wiping away a tear, "I guess we'd better see Lauren and Trick. The sooner they can fix me up, the sooner I can be on my way. K?"
Bo surprised Tamsin and pecked her on the cheek and just let her know, "Thanks for being courageous and honest with me."
Tamsin felt her heart ache again slightly but because she was there, with her, it didn't hurt. She still hadn't decided what to do with Bo quite yet, but at least she had a little time to decide since Bo was getting fixed up. She had to see Lauren too which she wasn't looking forward to.
Kenzi snuck away. She was sad for them both. Tamsin didn't want to be hurt anymore or be Bo's slave and Bo was brave enough to take the high road and own up for her mistake. They did love each other but Tamsin was oddly right. How can 2 star crossed lovers just continue to mess up and hurt one another?
Kenzi just hoped that no trouble would come out of their visit to Lauren's clinic.
A/N: Comment, Fav, and follow please!