CHAPTER FIFTEEN

There was always that sense of silence that followed something big. As if time was allowing you to fully absorb what had happened and to come up with a valid excuse.

I saw it during my years at Rose and I can pinpoint each one out: After Harding's death, Daniel and Jess's death, when Mattie first told me about Caim being dead.

It happened again after I shot him. Shot my brother. While the dust collapsed under me and blew in the soft breeze that the open double doors allowed in, almost like they were scattering Caim's ashes themselves.

It plastered on Mattie's face of absolute shock, confusion, love amongst the hate.

I knew it was on mine as I stared at the place where Caim's head would have been.

"What have you done?" Mattie said. He was desperately trying to remove all traces of emotion in his voice. But I heard the tone. There was no way in Hell I would have forgotten or even missed it.

"He attacked me first." I said it as a matter of fact - which it was - but it was the wrong thing to say.

"Iain wanted him alive!"

"I would have fucking died! Didn't you hear the shots? Why didn't you come earlier?" I screamed. "Rose wouldn't have wanted a rogue vampire in their midst."

"Rose wouldn't have wanted the only-" He failed to find the words. He was really angry with me. "-Caim to die!"

"No." I stood up, dropping Alpha and Beta. I pointed a shaking finger at him. "You didn't want him to die. Rule eight and nine?"

No! Professional Alice screamed as she did the unprofessional thing of pulling her hair. If you mention that, there's no going back!

I continued anyway. "You should have never let your feelings into a case. It was a mistake on Iain's part to assign us this case knowing the suspect was close to both of us."

"And what about yours?" He hissed. "They were on your face for years."

What?

"I have no idea what you're on about, Mattie." I said. But I knew he knew. Just like Iain picked up on it. I don't know how.

He was staring daggers at me as he stepped closer. Unlike Caim, I didn't try to keep the distance between us. Those eyes that had that blood red colour held me in place.

I tried to regulate my breathing knowing in the past I couldn't.

He stopped in front of me with about two steps or so distance.

"Alice." He said. "I'm letting you go. Find another partner. I never want to see your face."

I blinked. My legs gave way as I collapsed on the ground. My breathing which I tried so hard to control came in short bursts. It felt like I couldn't even get enough air in my lungs.

Shit! And it's my fault.

I woke up bleary eyed. Noises surrounded me but they were too distorted that I couldn't make out what they were. Everything was bright and just way too white.

Suddenly a shadow popped into view saying something. It was facing me. The only thing I could do was shake my head as the darkness took over me.

A breath entered my lungs noisily as if they had been devoid of oxygen for a while.

My eyes fluttered open but quickly shut again as white light scored them. They needed to adjust yet.

"Hey, are you okay?"

A woman's voice. Who? I barely knew any women in Rose.

There was a light touch on my wrist prompting me to peek through half closed eyes. I had to blink a few more times though.

Another deep breath rushed through into my lungs.

"Lucy?"

A vampire was staring right back at me. Someone I didn't know. But she looked at me with kind eyes and a gentle smile which put my fears to rest.

I opened my mouth to reply but instead I coughed harshly. Pain seared right through me like a knife straight down my back.

"Hey, hey. Slow down," she said raising me on the bed with a control to give me a sip of water. I winced as it went down.

"What- Where am I?" My voice croaked out.

"You're in the city hospital."

What?

Immediately I started getting up. I can't be here. I can't be here because I'm with Rose.

"Lucy, don't-" The nurse put her hands on my shoulders to gently push me back on the bed. I had to ignore the shot of pain that overloaded my senses as she did so.

But I froze as a thought came up. She took the chance to put me right in the bed including straightening the covers.

Am I still with Rose? After what happened?

Images of the attacks came to mind. How close was I to death fighting another vampire - two fucking vampires! The whole reason for the 'Don't physically fight another vampire' rule. Against them humans were just like cattle.

How the fuck did I even survive?

"You know," the nurse said, "there's someone waiting for you to wake up. He's in the hallway. Do you want me to let him in for you?"

I sighed running a hand over my damp forehead. It had broke out in a sweat with the pain.

"Yeah."

"I'll get you some painkillers in the meantime." As she left, leaving the door open for my visitor, she nodded the approval to the man in question.

Iain.

It looked like he had been there for a few weeks. His brown hair was messed up and he hadn't shaved - there were the beginnings of a five o'clock shadow. I wasn't used to it. He wore a white shirt though untucked and a pair of jeans.

I coughed ignoring the pain again to greet him.

Iain sat down on the stool next to my bed. "Hey, how are you feeling?"

"Terrible." I sighed. "I hurt absolutely everywhere." Not to mention the emotional pain stabbing my heart a million times.

Iain sighed. "It's amazing you even survived two vampires. Management is at my neck again wanting to know the details and why you needed to use part of Rose above ground."

"Above ground? You didn't tell them about what happened yet?" I feel like I've been sleeping since forever ago!

"This hospital is part of Rose but it's rarely used. That nurse who's taking care of you is also part of Rose." Iain shrugged, "I guess it's for emergency or just in case reasons."

I sagged on the bed. "I don't feel amazing. How long have I been here? What happened afterward in the barn?"

"About a week. You gave me quite a shock. Mattie called me to say the case was done and that he wanted a change in feeder." Yay. "By then I was already heading to the barn."

I frowned. Why was he going there too?

"His tone of voice was what got me and I'm pretty glad I acted on it. Christ, Alice you were drowning in a pool of blood unconscious. Nearly gave me a heart attack!"

"Sorry." I mumbled.

"Ah, we'll get into all the details later. Just sleep, okay? Get better. I'll deal with shitty management." Iain stood ruffling my hair a bit in goodbye for now.

"You're not wrong, Alice."

I sat in Iain's office without Mattie next to me. I felt empty and alone without knowing he was there.

We were going through possible partners for me. Frankly I didn't want to find another partner. Can't I just stay around Rose without one?

A month had passed since the real death of Caim. They had done a DNA test on the ashes. No one had seen Mattie.

I also hadn't received any sort of punishment or garnish since shooting Caim.

But shooting Caim… my brother is just…

"You agree with me?" I said shocked.

"Of course." Iain had been pacing the room. He stopped to look at me. "You did your job."

I thought he would side with Mattie.

I sighed. "Why was Caim so fixated on Mattie?" I had told my version of events to the team. Actually it's the only set of events until Mattie showed up.

"Hm. My guess would be that it was the last emotion Caim had before he died. Maybe Mattie just carried it on."

"Oh." I felt kind of down when I heard that. I never told Caim how I felt about Mattie so for him to realise them in that way is just…

"Hey, don't be upset. You know Mattie's probably in one of his moods and that was one of those 'in the moment' type things." Iain decided to sit down on his chair, leaning so far back I thought he might just topple over.

"Yet you're looking for a new partner for me almost immediately." I paused. "Has he done something like this before?"

"No." Iain said sighing.

"Glad I'm his first then." I stared.

And there you go with the virgin innuendo.

"Well now that the 'new partner' thing is said out loud, I might have found someone." There were some clicks on the screen as Iain did something on the computer. "Yes, his name is Sam Hunt." Iain waved a hand for me to move around look at the screen too. On it was an image of a guy with sharp features with thick black hair and brown eyes. Beside his image there was a fact file detailing his weight, height, blood preference (I assume this was what he liked to drink), any other associated names. There was more but that was what was shown without having to scroll down.

"He's a vampire who was turned a good few hundred years ago - one of the unspoken reliables actually." Iain continued.

"Reliables?"

"Yeah… among us managers we can tell who is a bit shady, who's honest etc… yeah I know." Iain added as he took one look on my face which said 'you can actually read a vampire's face without knowing a bit about him?' It might also have said 'what the fuck, I struggle reading Mattie's face after spending all this time with him.'

"So… yeah, a reliable vampire."

"When am I meeting him?" I asked.

"Right now he's in a case. It'll probably be early next week, I'll update you on the details for that when I get new info as usual."

I nodded. I can survive a few more days in The Manor, right? I can avoid him, right?

"Hey, Alice?" His tone changed like he was nervous about saying what he wanted to say. "Why don't you like… stay round my place for a bit while this thing with Mattie blows over?"

He's inviting me?

"What?"

"You know, with this thing I don't think seeing Mattie now would make things easier so…"

"There are no safe houses?" Iain shook his head. "Well sure I guess."

Iain lived in a large detached house just outside of the city. Beige coloured with its roof in a nice burgundy colour complete with a porch, a patch of grass for a small garden in front, it was an easy sight to look at.

He also had a large brick driveway that could hold two or three cars by the look of it, I don't know.

I stood in front of the black Mercedes we arrived in. Iain was halfway in the boot.

To be honest, I'm not sure what to even think. I still classed Iain as my… manager… not as someone who I could consider as my… friend? I don't know, the thought is a bit foreign to a girl who didn't really have a job before this and with the idea of mentor and student relationship.

"Don't worry about anything okay, Alice." He said finally leaning out. "I'll talk to Mattie- Well not talk but just leave him some messages because we both know he's not going to reply from God knows wherever he is. I won't say exactly where you're staying, of course."

"Ah, yeah, thanks."

"There's also the matter of meeting Katy, but that should be fine." Iain winked at me. Iain winked at me. "You're already accustomed to new people."

"What are you on about?" I said.

Katy, it turned out, was Iain's wife: A vampire with blond hair, blue eyes, petite with a lovely smile.

I was kind of shocked when I saw she was a vampire though. I never thought about marriage between a vampire and human was possible due to the different societies and the very obvious lifespan, but seeing Iain with a genuine smile lighting up a face that was run down severely with work… It was refreshing to know that there was someone there at the end of a day to make everything better. I suppose it was even more so with this kind of job.

"Lucy! How lovely to meet you!" Katy gave me a bear hug. Behind her I stared at Iain feeling a bit awkward. "I've heard you're in a tight spot at the moment. But it's okay you can bunk with us."

"I'm really sorry." I mumbled as she held me at arm's length looking at me with those blue eyes.

She smiled warmly, "Don't you worry. If you don't mind there's a spare guest room on the second floor you can make yourself comfortable. I'll have your stuff there in a few minutes."

A few minu- Oh right, vampire.

I hadn't packed a lot despite Iain's assurance on being welcomed into his household. I mainly had my go bag.

"It's only this," I held up my bag.

Katy pulled a face like she put a whole lemon in her mouth. Iain laughed saying his wife was the queen of keeping things and that I would be able to understand once I finally got in the house.

I sat around a table that was really for five. I hadn't had dinner with a friend - or manager - since living at home all those years ago so I was feeling a bit nervous.

Iain was cooking whilst Katy was setting up the table. Vampires, Iain was telling me, did not know how to cook unless they were exposed to human society long enough. He said he would be surprised if there was a vampire working at Rose who didn't know how to.

Katy was teasing him as he said this, making a puppet with her hand, suggesting he went on and on about it. I smiled. This atmosphere was such a change I found myself wondering if I missed my parents. I did in the few months after we left but they didn't make any attempt at getting Caim and I back. It got bad at special occasions.

Iain turned around in the kitchen looking over the breakfast bar that separated it from the dining room. Holding a plate of lasagna with oven gloves, he was grinning from ear to ear.

"Smells good, Iain."

"It's the Wright special."

"So, he says." Katy said before leaning down to whisper, "In reality it's a recipe from the internet."

Iain placed the steaming dish at the centre and laid a ladle on top. "She wasn't supposed to know that, Katy!" He prodded his wife's sides with a stubby gloved hand.

I laughed. I felt awkward despite the welcome.

There wasn't that much to note at Iain's place. It was a bit weird having to adjust to a 'normal' lifestyle. Although I wasn't totally new to it. This was so similar to my life before Rose was a change that was… I didn't know how to finish that sentence. I had this feeling at the base of my stomach that was in between being nervous and something very unwelcome. Maybe I had gotten used to my life with Mattie at The Manor.

I guess Iain wanted me to take some time away from the thoughts of Mattie and the current state of my 'career' because it was a week after I had arrived here, sat on a small balcony at the back of the house where he said, "Sam's finished his case."

Who's Sam? Wait, is he the vampire I was supposed to be with?

"Oh." A silence crossed my mind briefly before it worked again. "Does Mattie know?"

Iain leaned on the railing beside me. There was only enough room for two.

"I'm going to message him after telling you."

"Is he getting a partner?"

"Eventually."

"What do you mean?"

He shuffled, scratching the railing as if there was something there. "Advanced feeders have the priority in this scenario. Because your only main aim is to aid a vampire, it becomes void when you break up for any reason. If we can't find you employment with another vampire then we'd have to let you go." He had said all this gazing out over the back garden. It was only now he looked at me to emphasize his point, "How can I put this? Alice, this job… It will be your only job."

Death? What? Unemployment for the rest of my life? Either one isn't good and I don't plan on losing this just because of some moody ass vampire couldn't keep his emotions to himself.

But I didn't know this small print.

"What's he like? Sam, I mean." I frowned because my brain didn't seem to realise we were talking about Mattie in my head and Sam outloud.

"Sam's really… professional. He's one of those guys who does everything by the book."

Way to rub salt in the wound.

"However he's also flexible." Iain continued.

"Which is why he is reliable?" I shrugged.

"Kind of." He grinned. "But don't let his professionalism get you. He is a really great guy. He's going to be at the office tomorrow morning. It would be great if you were there, Alice."

"Sure."

A silence came down on us with only the breeze stealing the sound of our breathing away.

I wonder what Mattie is doing right now. Is he like me? Does he not care?

"Hey, Iain?"

"Alice?"

"Mattie said my emotions were on my face." Well that wasn't really a question but I saw Iain nodding so I decided not to add on to it.

"Yeah… you see, your eyes dilate when you see someone you're interested in."

Oh.

"Alice." I guess it was Iain's turn to say something. "You shouldn't really beat yourself up. I've been in this job for so long that I know how some people react. I know this because in this job, you lose a lot of people - a lot of great people for that matter. Brave for seeking Rose and braver yet to follow through to be employed by us. The death comes with the job. You only get to know it after your experiences." I was going to say all my 'experiences' were from him so he was really shaping what I know, but he held up his hand. "I know what you're going to say and I'm choosing to ignore it. You might see me doing it all for you, but it's really Mattie and your choice in the matter. Remember the case with Harding? I'm pretty sure a million things went on in your mind but ultimately you chose to kill him. I'm not saying it is a bad thing. Heck, I wanted the bastard dead myself.

"What I'm trying to say is it's normal. That's the culture here at Rose. You may have friends but there is a lack of emotion here. People have gone through a tremendous amount of pain but they still continue at Rose. Everything that you've done for Rose is absolutely fine. I've not needed to report your conduct or give you warnings. I see you as one of the best advanced feeders I've managed so far. Your mentality, though a bit confused and new, is perfect for Rose and this job."

It took me a moment to realise he was praising me.

"Iain, I don't think-"

"I do. You're a great help to us."

I frowned but said, "Thank you."

"And Alice, I'll do everything in my power to protect your job here with me and with Rose, no matter what."

I was shocked silent. I never imagined someone would recognise me for this. I never imagined that murdering people would be praised. What Iain said just now moved me. And a tiny bit of me was repulsed by it. I didn't know what to say to that so I replied, "Thank you, Iain. Thank you for everything you've done for me so far."

Sam Hunt was a very likable vampire. Friendly and funny, Sam has an easy smile that you could do nothing but appreciate.

All of us, Iain, Sam and I were in Iain's office. It kind of annoyed me that Sam was sat in Mattie's seat but there was nothing I could do. I mean, how many other people sat in front of Iain before Mattie and I?

"So… aside from the introductions, back to work." Iain said. Since I arrived here I noticed he was keeping an eye on me for some reason. Maybe because he was thinking I was still attached to Mattie, which I was but… I guess I should move on faster.

"I'm going to put you on security. It'll help you two to get to know each other."

"Where are we going?" Sam said.

"To a birthday celebration for Hartley. It's tomorrow night. By the looks of the invite-" Iain paused to fish it out of a draw. He held a thin wafer of paper that looked more tissue, with long curved writing in gold detailing Bloody Rose was invited to the party and the where and when.

There was an emblem at the top of what looked like the family crest.

"Do you recognise the name, Alice?" Sam asked. I shook my head. "Hartley is one of the pure blood families."

"Yes, and as representatives of Rose, we need you to be extra careful. It's more than likely everyone that's not a pure blood will see you and Sam as a threat."

"A threat?" Damn, I should really read up on my studies again or something. I feel so behind.

"There aren't that many purebloods nowadays. Let's just call them 'regular vampires', no offence, Sam." Iain motioned at Sam who waved his hand for him to continue, "there are even less to carry on the pure blood gene."

"Oh!" A light bulb went off in my head, "I remember now, Sarah said there were five pure blood families, Hartley, Raven, Thomas, Davison and Taylor."

"Yes, and Davison you've already met when you were on security with Mattie." Iain nodded. "Mattie is one, he's the only person of his family. Davison is large."

I felt a burst of happiness when I heard Mattie's name shortly followed by disappointment and hurt. That happiness only lasted for a second. If only I knew how he was feeling… My chest felt tight.

"Yeah, you can probably tell who is in the Davison family just by smelling them!" Sam laughed bringing me out of my thoughts.

Iain grinned. I was like 'what?'

Seeing my confusion Sam explained that when you're a vampire, people from the same family have a similar smell which totally killed the mood.

"Hartley, Raven and Thomas are the more secretive types. There was a rumour going around that Hartley was part of Gold but no one could prove it so it stays in the wind." Iain held up his hands. "Don't ask me how that started, it was around when I started working at Rose.

"Anyway, yeah. Hartley is a pure blood family and as such vampire society is more cautious around them."

"How come we didn't have this conversation before I met Davison?" I asked. I don't think I think I remember him mentioning the pure blood family in this much detail.

Iain sighed. "To be honest, it didn't really cross my mind. I suppose I just assumed Mattie would have told you considering he's a pure blood himself. But you learnt he's a pure blood when I showed you, right? I should have known that he doesn't talk about his past much."

"He didn't mention anything." I agreed.

"Does that invite say whose birthday it is and how old?" Sam asked changing the topic. Thank God. If I continued talking about Mattie, I think my chest might swallow me up, it's so tight. I had to rub it to see if that helped.

"Uh… No but it could be Roland Hartley. Alice, Roland is the second in line to being head of the family." Iain said.

"But don't let his status scare you, he's a down to earth kind of guy." Sam said. "But yeah, tomorrow night?"

"At nine pm." Iain said giving us the thin invite. "Sam, I want a report afterwards. Alice, depending on what happens, I want one off you too."

I nodded. I could do that.

"Well then! Have fun!"