Melly was sitting with her brush,staring at the window.
- I like our backyard. - She mumbled emotionlessly.
- Melly,do you have family? - After the session with Doctor i became more interested with my roommate.
- Family...yeah,of course...like every normal person... - Her voice sounded robotic. She didn't even look at me.
Melly was always animated and talkative but not that time. I decided to leave her alone. My brain was working hard. I finally figured out what to do.
The revenge plan perfectly formed in my head like pieces of jigsaw. How could i give up and let Stahl have his life back,after all he had done. His
victorious grin should be erased for good. And i would be the one to do it.
- Harlee,you are just as insatiable as i am...- Stahl's voice echoed in my ears. I opened my eyes to see him sitting on the couch in my appartment.I
could see how relaxed he seemed while his eyes were burning. My apartment looked so real. Everything was in it's place except for Stahl. He was
totally out of place.
- I want to heal you... - I said mockingly. A new rush of confidence rose in me.
- Oh,that's amazing! - He exclaimed,staring at me with wild excitement.
- Yes. It's your turn to be saved... - I knew i had to start to battle Stahl in my head,then i would be able to do it in real life.
- Harlee,but it won't wash off this blood on your hands...- His eyes slid down to my hands.
- Shit... - I whispered,looking at my hands that were covered in blood.
- It's a rather usual thing for you,right? Blood is constant in your life. - His sinister tone sent shivers down my spine. I rushed to the bathroom. The
blood on my hands was sticky. I turned on the tap but there was no water.
- Grab a towel,Harlee. - Stahl was standing behind me, savoring every moment of my torture.
I did what he said and started to rub the blood off my hands. But seemed like it got under my skin. I just couldn't get rid of it.
- Let me help you... - Stahl walked up to me but i pushed him away and run to the kitchen. I was frantically searching for a bottle of mineral water
or anything liquid.
- Poor Harlee...- I heard his sarcastic gigle.
- Shut up. - I hissed through my teeth,pouring orange juice on my hands. It was the only liquid thing that i could find.
- Try harder... - He was taunting me.
- I said SHUT UP!- I turned around and threw a bottle at him,but missed. All my efforts to wash away the blood were in vain.
- Wow!That was so close! - Stahl's face couldn't be more appalling. His malicious joy was nauseating.
- You know what! I'm ok with it! Yes!There's blood on my hands!Let it be! - I just had to stop that panic attack. Stahl wasn't going to see me like
that anymore.
- That's right...own it,Harlee...- He came closer to me with a strange look on his face.
- I'm not afraid of you... - I balled up my fists,trying to stop my hands from shaking. Stahl slowly took my left hand,not breaking eye contact with
me,and put it to his lips. I could hear his loud and warm breathing.
- You're a psycho...- I mumbled with mixture of shock and disgust.
- I can wash it away,Harlee... - Stahl whispered passionately and licked my hand.
- Stop it! - I tried to pull back my hand but his grip was too strong.
- Let me... - His eyes were changing into a pair of black bottomless pits. It was a dark desire that Stahl hid from people around him. No one could
imagine that altar boy to have that kind of side.
- No... - I whimpered,feeling trapped in his stare.
Stahl snarled and took my forefinger into his mouth. I felt like my body was set on fire.
- Stahl,stop! - I whispered,trying to block out a strange rush of pleasure that Stahl gave me. My body was betraying me.
He stopped and slowly pull out my finger from his mouth. It was white,no blood stains.
I woke up in a cold sweat,vibrating like a string. My mind was so confused and lost. What was happening to me?
The next day i spent waiting for Woz and thinking about the possible outcomes of my plan. Melly acted normal for herself. She talked a lot about
everything but i couldn't believe in her stories anymore. The time always moves so slowly,when you are waiting for something to happen. But the
fear that i acquired was getting worse. I was so tired of nightmares. Every night i would have another torture. I had to get rid of Stahl. Maybe my
recovery needed to start with his ultimate fall or even...death in real life.
- Harlee... - Woz opened his arms to hug me as tight as he could. He looked very pale and weary.
- I've missed you so much!How is Christina? - I was so happy to see him but at the same time i felt excruciating pain in my heart for my little girl.
- She is recovering,Harlee. - Woz avoided my anxious stare.
- Christina doesn't want to see me...will she ever forgive me? - It wasn't the question for Woz. I asked myself.
- She will...i'm sure...Harlee,i need to be discreet,please,pay attention to what i'm gonna say. - He started to whisper so noone could hear us.
I nodded.
- I can get you out of here...we can arrange an escape for you. You will cross the border. - Woz took my hand and i could feel how nervous he was.
- Escape? And live like a scam for the rest of my life. No...i have a better idea...i will fix this.I need your help. - Woz's suggestion sounded really
enticing but i couldn't let myself become a fugitive.
- What do you have in mind? - He squinted his green eyes.
- You need to spread the word about my mental breakdown. Just make sure that everyone knows how bad i'm now. - I was so excited to finally get
down to the first stage of my plan.
- Harlee,what's the reason? - Woz was staring at me with evident shock on his face.
- I need Stahl to know that I'm completely crushed. He won't be able to resist temptation to see me like this with his own eyes... - I leaned
over,speaking as quitely as i could. Woz didn't say anything. He was staring at me without blinking as if i hypnotized him.
- I will catch him,Woz. I need him to believe that i'm helpless and broken and then i will get him talking. - I was enunciating every word like a
teacher with well-prepared speech.
- Harlee,i think we have to forget about him and concentrate on your life. - His dry and stern voice sounded unfamiliar.
- Woz,i can't breathe freely,knowing that he is out there with his reputation intact...i won't be able to live like this...common,Woz. - I put my hand on his.
- His reputation isn't clean,Harlee. They've put him in the office. He is doing papers and nothing more. I will get him when the time is right but now
we need to save you. - His piercing green eyes were full of sadness.
- Woz,my life won't start again without him being locked up.I need you to get me a bug in here.- I was trying to keep my voice quiet but it was
getting harder and harder. I thought that Woz would be on board with me right away.
- Harlee...i don't want you to jeopardize your life. Stahl is a very dangerous man...and he holds all the cards. - Woz pulled back his hand.
- You tell me! I know him better than anybody else! If someone takes him down,it will be me! - I raised my voice,desperately trying to convince my only ally.
- Harlee,listen...i start to think that they are right about your obsession with him. - His words fell on me like a ton of bricks.
- Woz,what are you talking about?! - I mumbled,staring at him in disbelief.
- I'm talking about your behavior. The therapy should help you,Harlee...- Woz slowly stood up,leaving me speechless.
- Woz! - I tried to grab his hand but he moved away as if i disgusted him.
- No,Harlee. You really need help. - He walked out,slamming the door behind him.
I froze in place,staring down at the table. Suddenly i was deafened by loud applause.
- That was so heartbreaking to watch! I've almost shed a tear...- Stahl's voice sounded unusually cheerful.
- Prick! - I hit the table in agony.
- Harlee...- He made a mockingly reproachful face. Stahl was wearing the same suit that he wore in court.
- It's so much fun to watch your despair and fear in a full display...you doubt that Woz will help you...poor Harlee. - I wished that his tightly adjusted tie would suffocate him.
- Go to Hell! - I jumped up,flipping the table.
- Wow!This's impressive! - Stahl was getting more and more excited.
- I'm going to kill you! - I run up to him and punched him right in his pale face.
- Don't hurt me,Detective! - He cried in a high-pitched voice to piss me off even more.
I kicked him in his groin with all my much i wanted to see him in pain!
- It's not enough...Harlee... - He hunched down before me but didn't show any signs of suffering from my punch. Stahl's eyes were glimmering with
excitement.
- I will get to you,Stahl...i will... - I was short of breath and felt dizzy. It seemed like i was falling.
I woke up in the room, vibrating from Melly's snoring.
-Harlee,i was in love with my neighbour...he was 15 and i was 16. First love,you know. Noone knew that i loved him. Even he didn't know about my
feelings.I was fat and ugly while he was a popular boy at was too good for me... - Melly was swallowing pieces of an apple pie that looked
like mashed potatoes. I wasn't really listen to what she was saying but the last sentence caught my attention.
- He was too good for me... - I mumbled,imagining James's beautiful face.
- It was sick love. I couldn't breathe without seeing him every day. He was always greeting me but it was just his good manners. When he started
dating one of cheerleaders,my heart broke into pieces...- Melly was a good storyteller. But her joyfull face gave away the lies that she was trying to
sell me.
- Melly,what was his name? - I couldn't listen to her fairytale anymore.
- His name was...Martin... - She looked up at the ceiling, making up a name right on the spot with a little hesitation.
- Cool... - I stood up,leaving my breakfast untouched.
- Come in,Harlee. - Doctor Gleeson was adjusting one of the pictures on the wall.
I walked in and sat in the armchair in complete silence.
- Do you want some tea?- He examined me and got to conclusion that i was in a bad mood.
- No,thank you... - I politely declined with a pocker face.
- I assume you're having a bad day. Let's talk about something that bothers you. - His eyes in glasses seemed like two binoculars that were
watching my every move.
- I'm having a hard time adjusting to my new life...- I wanted to tell him the whole truth but i knew that it would be in vain.
- I think it's more than that. - Doctor's delicate voice started to annoy me.
- Doctor,i told you that it's all new for me ...Also i have nightmares - My headache was so severe that i had hard time keeping my eyes opened.
- Nightmares. How can you describe them? - He started to dig like all psychiatrists do.
- They are draining and confusing...i'm afraid to fall asleep...- I closed my eyes,resting my head against the back of the armchair.
- You see different scenarious or just one? - Doctor's voice became distant.
- Different but he is always there...- Stahl's face popped up in my mind and opened my eyes.
- You are constantly in contact with him because right now you can't imagine your life without him,so he's not here with you in reality and you bring
him into your dreams to fill the void. - Doctor was talking smoothly with evident pleasure. He felt like he was cracking a hard nut.
- I guess so...- I gave him a bitter grin.
- In these nightmares you feel helpless or you can control the situation? - His questions were getting more precise.
- Mostly helpless...but sometimes i can regain my confidence...and do something... - I mumbled much i hated my weakness.
- You are in confrontation with him in your dreams. What bothers you the most about him? - Doctor was carefully taking notes.
- The most painful thing for me is to know that he is out there...without me...with somebody else...- I mixed the truth with a grain of lie,so my
Doctor could analyze my obsession.
- Jealousy...- He savored that word like a candy.
- I need to get rid of this constant craving for him...- My voice sounded whiny enough to make it sound credible.
- Of course,Harlee. Don't worry...i'm here to do just to avoid talking to him in your dreams. Just ignore. - The Doctor was excited to give
me his treatment. His face was glowing with genuine kindness. That made me feel bad for lying to him but i had to,like i always did.
When i returned to my room,Melly wasn't there. It was something that i wanted - to be alone. But i was worried for my strange roommate.
I was waiting for her but she wasn't coming back. When the young nurse visited me,I asked her about Melly.
- She will be back soon. - Blondie smiled at me and rushed out of the room.
I knew that something was wrong but what could i do?
- Detective Santos. - I heard Stahl's voice. It didn't surprise me anymore.
I opened my eyes. He was sitting infront of me. I instantly recognized the room. It was my first interrogation right after FBI caught me red-handed.
- How do you feel? - Stahl's voice was tender and low.
Right before i was about to open my mouth to cuss him out,I remembered Doctor's advice to ignore him.
- Everything started here. - He stood up slowly,not letting me out of his sight. I froze in place,trying to look away.
- You keep silence,Harlee...that's something new - Stahl was standing like a monument with his usual confidence and pride. My hands started to
shake just from hearing his voice. Stahl's presence was oppressive.
- Harlee... - Stahl hummed my name,smiling at me. He seemed amuzed by my unusual behavior.
He walked right up to me. I supressed the urge to look up at him. Instead i kept my head down.
-You can't ignore me...- Stahl's whisper sent shivers down my spain.
I closed my eyes,desperately trying to stop my hands from shaking.
- My poor Harlee...keep fighting... - He shifted to the back and stood behind me.
I started shivering from head to toe. It was uncontrolable reaction of my body. But i managed to keep my eyes shut. Suddenly I felt his hands on
my shoulders. Stahl was trying to make me react.
- Go on...- His malicious chuckle cut me like a knife,but i surpressed an urge to jump up.
His hands slowly drifted to my neck,tenderly caressing my skin. I felt nausea kicking in.
- Open your eyes,Harlee...talk to me...- Stahl's hands travelled up and dug in my hair. I was so close to losing my composure. My body was
twitching like he electrified me with his touch.
- Common... - Stahl exhaled in my ear. I felt completely trapped. And it was all in my head.
- Maybe you want me to go further... - He hissed with supressed rage and pulled my hair back,inflicting pain. I whimpered but stayed still.
- Amazing,Harlee...- He abruptly took his hands off me. I heard his voice in a distance like he was finally leaving.
Silence was soothing and i managed to regain control of my shaking hands. I slowly opened my eyes and found myself in my appartment. My heart
ached as i thought about my Christina. She must be here somewhere. I wanted to see her so badly at least in my dream. The first urge was to go to
her room but i heard lustful moans coming from my bedroom. I opened the light was off.
- Robert...- My mind couldn't process the similarity between mine and that woman's voice.
- Say it again... - Stahl's silhouette was laying on a woman while she was impatiently moving under him.
- Robert...please... - It was my voice. The realization hit me and i frantically switched on the light.
Stahl looked at me with no surprise on his face. The woman under him covered her face.
- I'm so glad that you're here...Harlee... - He was wearing only his black pants. The expression on his pale face told me that he liked my reaction.
- Come in. Make yourself at home... - Stahl stood up,showing me his vile grin. I rushed to the woman, laying in my bed.
- Harlee,don't be jealous...- He was laughing at me.
- Look at me! - I grabbed and shook that woman to see who she was. The wig slid off.
- Please don't hurt me... - Gina was looking at me with tears in her hazel eyes.
I froze in place,finding myself squeezing her shoulders too tight.
- Let her go,Harlee...she is nothing to worry about anymore. - I heard female voice behind me.
I turned back and saw Katie Myers standing in the black lingerie next to Stahl. It was the same lingerie that he put on me,when i was tied up to the chair.
- Katie,he will ruin you!Listen to me!- The dam broke and i couldn't do anything. I rushed to her but Stahl stepped forward, not letting me get close
to Katie.
- Harlee,she is just my temporary toy...don't worry...you the one for me...- Stahl whispered, suggestively touching my сheek. His cold blue eyes were on fire.
- Get out! - I screamed at the top of my lungs right in his face,pushing him in his chest.
- Restrain Careful. - While i was punching my way out of that nightmare,i heard voices.
- Minimal dose. - Unfamiliar female voice was distant.I felt a needle in my arm. I opened my eyes and saw two nurses standing above me.
- Stop! - My mind was too confused to understand what was happening.
- You need to calm down. - One of the nurses held me down to the bed while the other one injected something in my veins.
- No...no...- Instantly i started to lose consciousness,falling back in my darkness.