AN: I'm so sorry this chapter took a few days longer to publish than the others, I had my hands full of homework and tests I had to study for. But I hope you like it!

"what the hell just happened…" Clarke whispered as she cried to herself. Got flashbacks from that day she had caused the scar and the reason why she did it. At that, it made her fall on her knees, sobbing. She fell on the floor, felt depression hit her hard, and made her exclaim.

A knock made itself heard and the door opened itself, behind it was Raven and Luna. "Hey Cla - " She got eyes on Clarke, quickly knelt down in front of the crying blonde. "oh my god, what happened?" She embraced the blonde. Luna knelt too, looked confused and sad herself. Clarke just sobbed more at Raven's attempt to calm her down by cradle her.

Raven let it be silent for a moment. When she had managed to calm her friend down, she finally had courage to ask her what was wrong. Raven and Luna had seen Lexa in the lobby but somehow been rejected to look her in the eyes. But with Clarke, Raven was more than welcome to look at her eyes, they were drowning in tears, she could feel the pain.

Clarke told her about Lexa who had found out about her scar. Luna took a quick look at Clarke wrist, finding a big scar. How she snapped and walked out of here. "I know I did something stupid, but why were she so mad?"

Luna sighed, took a step aback Clarke. The two of them turned to look at Luna. "Do you know why?" They were waiting, thirsty for knowledge. Luna shook her head, looking up at the ceiling then back at the girls. "She hasn't told you?" Then sighed once more when the girls shook their heads, frowning.

"That's how her mother died" Luna almost whispered. "No… Lexa told me she died after having Lexa and that her father left them when he found out she was pregnant. Then she lived with her grandmother till she died, and then she moved to her first foster home that was loving and adopted her after a few years…" Clarke told as she realize the story wasn't quite true.

"No…? I don't know why she told you that… her mother committed suicide when she was five, she was the one finding her… she was young but remembered every single detail when she told us. After her mother died, her father started drinking and couldn't take care of Lexa anymore. Lexa got sent to a crappy foster home" Luna's eyes were filled with hate. "I don't know if I should tell you, but you can ask her yourself. After two years in 8 different foster homes, Lexa finally got placed in a good one, Anya's. They took her in, made her welcome. She was seven when she first laid a foot in that house and nine or ten when she got adopted"

Clarke took a moment to take all this in. Her hands rubbed her forehead making space for this information. "oh my god, I'm so stupid" she hit herself on the forehead. "Hey, don't do that" Raven grabbed her hands so she wouldn't hit herself again. Clarke ran back to the living room, grabbed everything in her way to look after her phone. She tried to call Lexa but she had clearly denied the call. The blonde was swiping and tapping her way to the message app.

Blondie: I know you don't want to talk to me, but I'm sorry Lexa. It was a long time ago and I regret It so much! Luna told me the reason why you may have walked out on me. Again, I'm so sorry… for what I did and for what memories that must have come back to you… please just call or text me…

Lexa stared at the phone. Read the text repeatedly. She threw her phone on the bed and made herself comfortable. Thought back to the time she had found her mother.

Lexa and her mother were building Legos together. She loved her mother, she really did. But she was too young to understand why her mother was depressed and what 'depression' even was. Lexa noticed her mother didn't smile, just 'faked' a smile when only Lexa was looking at her. This was the so called 'depression' her mother had talked to Lexa about.

"Mommy, are you okay?" little Lexa asked worried as tears ran down her mother's cheeks but her mother seemed to have a resting face, with no expressions. "Yes" she smiled at her daughter. "You know, I'm a little tired… I think I want to go to bed early, is that okay? We can build Legos…" her mother swallowed. "later"

Lexa looked suspicious at her mother. "okay" she shrugged. "but promise we will play later?" Lexa embraced her mother, giving her a long 'goodnight' hug. "I promise…" her mother whispered. She hugged her a little harder, not too much that she wouldn't take her breath away. "I love you very much Lexa"

"I love you more, mommy" Lexa beamed at her mother. Lexa watched her mother hug and kiss her husband, saying she would go to bed early. She waved once again at Lexa before she disappeared from the living room.

After half an hour had passed, Lexa shuffled to the couch where her dad was. "Daddy, I'm tired…" she rubbed her eyes. "okay honey, you can brush your teeth and go sleep with mom, okay?" her father messed with her hair.

"okay"

Lexa did what her father asked her to do, she looked at herself in the mirror, smiled and nod her head in a rhythm to a song. As she finished getting ready for bed, she had carefully run up the stairs. After a few quick seconds, she was outside her parents' bedroom.

"Mommy…?" Lexa slowly opened the door, it was dark. She turned on the light, found her mother facing her back against her. Lexa crawled up in the bed, she came closer and closer her mom. "Mommy…" Lexa's eyes widened as she saw all the blood on the floor, dripped from her wrists. "Mommy!" Lexa exclaimed and tried to shake her mom alive again. She was crying so loud his father had hurried up the stairs and stormed in the bedroom. It was a shock for both of them. After that night, everything changed.

Lexa grabbed her pillow and hugged it hard. She had so many mixed feelings, heartbroken by Clarke's scar but also dead angry she had done it. She was feeling a little quilt for snapping at Clarke. She searched for her phone and pulled it against her with a moan. Luna and Clarke had texted her.

Luna: Lexa, call Clarke!

Luna: Lexa, seriously. Just talk to her

Luna: Lexa! Don't ignore me, Clarke need you!

Luna: For fuck sakes Lexa, I've never seen someone cry this much before, it's kind of terrifying…

Luna: Lexa, Jesus. Just fucking call her!

Lexa's eyes widened. Luna would never curse like this. She was always the calm person, but seeing Clarke cry must really have broken her. Lexa typed her friend back.

Lexa: Luna, calm down. I need to be alone right now, I regret snapping at Clarke but I don't regret walking out of there. It was too hard for me to handle… you know that? I'm sorry but tell I'll text her later.

Lexa saw that Luna was typing but the three dots disappeared after a few seconds. Lexa always got curious about little thing like that. 'What was Luna typing?'. As she was deciding whether she should ask her or not, she changed to tight shorts and an oversized t-shirt.

The brunette made her way to the freezer, finding a halfway eaten ice cream box. "This is just great" Lexa said to herself as she turned on the TV. "I finally found someone I may have a chance on, and I actually 'like' … but of course did I turn all 'drama queen'…" Lexa stabbed the ice cream. "Why do I always screw things up?... Why couldn't I be more mature with it and just stay there and talk to her?" she fed herself.

"Raven, don't… it's fine, just let me go" Clarke tried to persuade Raven to let her go over to Lexa's so they could work things out. "I just think it's not a good idea for you to drive while you're this upset!" Raven waved her hands in the air. Luna touched her shoulder to calm her down. She seemed to have this ability to make people relax. "Fine… just be careful?"

Clarke finally let a little smile show. Whispered a little 'thanks' before she heads out of the door. She hadn't been able to stand still waiting for, and in the elevator. She almost ran through the lobby and parking lot. "Come on, come on…" She nervously played drums on the car, waited for it to turn on. "Yes!" She drove fast as she could, but still not crossing the speed limit. It was like she had a dead line.

"Okay. Just say… Hey Lexa, I'm so sorry… I was so stupid back then… I was going through a hard time… and I know that choice wasn't the best… but it just seemed to be the only one coming to my mind… and that was the most stupid choice, I know… I have a scar for life now and it will probably not go away any time soon. I'm so sorry that it brought you bad memories… I understand if it's too hard to look at me…" She swallowed hard and closed her eyes quickly so her tears wouldn't make it hard for her to see the road.

She repeated what she was supposed to say all the way to Lexa. Luckily, she didn't met any familiar people in the lobby or the elevator. "Okay" Clarke exhaled as she was standing in front of Lexa's door. Clarke was ready to knock on the door, but the thought of Lexa may shut the door on her made her pull her hand back. "Come on…"

She closed her eyes for a few seconds and finally managed to knock on the damn door. Her heart was beating so fast as she heard Lexa's footsteps getting closer.

"Hey…"

Clarke took a few steps closer to Lexa, grabbed her hand and was ready to apologize. "Lexa, I'm so sorry. I was so-"She started, but immediately stopped when Lexa let go of her hand and pulled her in to a sweet kiss. Clarke kissed her back, and they ended up making out.

They carefully leaned their forehead against each other. "I know. Just don't ever do that again" Lexa whispered.

"I promise"

Lexa felt the need to hug the blonde, and so she did. Clarke rested her head on Lexa's warm neck, it was giving her a warm feeling. Lexa invited Clarke inside. They made their way to the living room. "I like your outfit" Clarke complimented the brunette. It was the first time she had ever seen Lexa with shorts and an oversized t-shirt. She was also looking pretty cute with the messy bun she had tied.

"Oh, thanks" Lexa sat down on the couch, clapping a little on the couch pillow so the blonde would sit next to her. It went silence for a while, but it was not awkward. "Clarke… I'm sorry I left you… I shouldn't have done that… even if it was hard for me to be in the same room as you… I should've been stronger" Lexa started, she had Clarke's attention. The blonde was quiet, waited for Lexa to continue. "I just thought if I shut my feelings for you, then it wouldn't be hard for me to know that you tried to…" Lexa looked at Clarke's wrist. "I just thought… If I just forgot you… somehow… It wouldn't be hard for me if you tried it again…" Lexa looked over at Clarke, noticing a shy little frown on the blonde's forehead.

"But that's not true. I would've been devastated. I can't just cut you out of my life… even though you haven't been in it for a long time… Not having you in my life, it would have destroyed me… I don't mean to scare you away, I know we only met a few days ago… but it feels like you're my…" Lexa looked in Clarke ocean blue eyes.

She got completely lost in her eyes, and as she couldn't find any words. Clarke leaned in for a pleasurable kiss. Lexa kissed the blonde back. They kept passing each other kisses. The blonde slowly leaned on Lexa, carefully pushing her on her back. The blonde was currently on top of the brunette. Removed her lips from Lexa's and kissed her neck. Clarke took of her cardigan and threw it on the floor. She once again kissed Lexa's lips, her cheeks and her neck. The blonde was grinding on the brunette. She took of her crop top, leaving her in only a bra. She had her hands on Lexa's t-shirt, ready to pull it off. As she the shirt was halfway off, Clarke noticed a big scar going from her waist to her navel.

"Wait" Lexa pulled down her t-shirt. Clarke removed herself from Lexa. "I don't think we're ready yet…" she nervously played with her fingers. Clarke had completely shut her mouth, bent a little down to pick up her crop top. "Clarke…" Lexa tried to make her understand, but the blonde seemed pretty upset. She had already put on her cardigan. "Clarke"

"What?" the blonde responded.

"Look at me" Lexa grabbed Clarke's hand. The blonde shyly looked at the brunette. "You know… I haven't felt this way with someone before… Just by looking at you makes me happy" Clarke smiled at Lexa's words. "I don't want to move too fast, okay? I'll let you know when I'm ready" Clarke nodded once again at her words.

She beamed at Lexa. "You can take the long road and drive fast… or you can take the short road but drive slow" Lexa kissed Clarke's soft lips. "That was beautiful"

"Lexa?" Clarke asked after a moment. The brunette hummed. "Where did you get that scar on your stomach?" She could feel Lexa nervously turned her head to face her. She removed her head from Clarke's shoulder. "I… ugh…" she swallowed.

The blonde gave the brunette a warm look, made her feel she could tell her. "After my mom died… it was just me and my dad… he… he started drinking, like a lot! One glass turned to two, one day turned to every day… talking turned to yelling… and hugging turned to hitting"

Clarke thought it was heartbreaking. She squeezed Lexa's hand. "You don't have to tell-" Clarke started but was soon interrupted by Lexa. She was vulnerable, but didn't mind sharing this with the blonde. "No, it's okay… I remember when I got that scar…" She looked up at the ceiling and looked back at the time her father had caused the scar.

"Happy birthday, daddy" Lexa smiled her perfectly cute smile at her father, handing him a drawing she had made. Her father huffed as he received the drawing. Lexa sat next to him. "This is you" She pointed at the drawing of her father. Her fingers slipped to the next person that was holding hands with him. "this is me" Her fingers kept moving to the other person next to her. "And this is mom" She smiled at her dad.

He was not smiling at all. In fact, he looked angry. He threw his empty glass on the floor, it shattered. Lexa jumped. She was scared to death for what her father was going to do next. "MOM IS DEAD" he shouted at her. He got up and pointed at the glass pieces. "Clean up!" He walked over to the liquor cabinet to get another glass and filled it up.

Lexa knelt down and started picking up the glass pieces. She had run to the kitchen to get the dustpan. She had dumped all the glass pieces in the trash can. "Throw your drawing" her father told her. "But dad…-" Lexa tried. "THROW THE DAMN DRAWING, ALEXANDRA!" He threw another glass, but this time right next to her.

"I don't want to…" Lexa cried. Her father picked up the half-broken glass that was sharp as fuck and threatened her. "DAMN IT, ALEXA! THROW THE FUCKING DRAWING OR…" He pushed the glass piece against Lexa's stomach. "I will hurt you" His eyes were flaming, shooting fireballs at her as she tried to extinguish the fire. Lexa cried so loud. "NO!"

At that, he had grabbed her so she wouldn't run away, and pulled up her shirt. His hands were bleeding from holding on to the glass too hard. He cut her. After the heartbreaking scene, cops entered the door. There had been neighbors complaining about loud noises coming from the house. Lexa just cried as they had to be violent with her dad because he didn't want to cooperate.

"After that, no one had been able to take care of me anymore. I got first sent to the hospital, then to a group home" Lexa cried. Clarke didn't say much, she wasn't a much of a talker when people shared something deep and emotional. She was only listening, nodding and understanding. Yes, she didn't know what to say when it came to these situations, but she knew exactly what to do, and that was to stay quiet and listen. Maybe hugged and touched them when they needed it.

"Lexa, I'm so sorry you had to go through that… I can't imagine what you have been through" Clarke embraced the crying brunette. The brunette embraced Clarke back, slowly pushed her backwards. Lexa was laying up to Clarke, almost on top of her. Her head were on Clarke's chest. She used Clarke's soft arm as a pillow. The blonde was almost on the edge of the couch. Lexa felt Clarke was slowly falling of the couch, she grabbed her by her waist and pulled the blonde closer to her.

The silent kept going for a good ten minutes. "Lexa?" Clarke whispered. She didn't get any response, so she figured Lexa was sleeping. She tried to remove herself from Lexa, but the brunette just pulled her back. "Don't go"

The blonde smiled to herself. Lexa wanted her to stay. It was crazy how connected she felt with Lexa. How the two of them seemed to be happy when the other one was around. Clarke's fingers softly went through Lexa's hair. She kissed the brunette's head. "okay"

AN: That was chapter 16! I hope you liked/loved it! :) if you did, please share it with me. Leave a review, follow or favorite. It would mean a lot to me :)