I was floating,dizzy and heavy. My mind was spinning thoughtlessly in circles. I didn't know how much time i spent in that nirvana,when i felt his presence. Stahl was
still there,lurking and watching.
- Don't torture me...please...no more. - My throat was dry and i could hardly speak.
He was silent.
- Stahl? I know...you're there... - I stuttered,trying to open my eyes.
I heard his slow quiet steps. He was plotting another scenario for me. But the truth was that it was my conscience wearing his face.
- I just don't want...i can't...- I couldn't believe that i was saying those things. He broke started to stream down my face as signs of my defeat.
I felt a soft touch on my cheek. It burned me with warmth.
- No... - I wanted to stand up,but i couldn't move.
- Harlee...- His hardly audible whisper sounded so distant.
- Let me go...just let me go... - I was talking to myself. What a joke!
- I try. - I heard his soft voice.
I finally managed to open my eyes. Though my sight was blurry,i saw his grey silhouette. He was standing above me like an unavoidable doom.
I started to feel panic kick in. The worst part of anxiety attack was that my body felt like it was chained in dull ache.
- Again. - Female voice interfered. Someone rushed up to me and took my hand.
- No...no.- I felt a cold needle in my arm.
- Mom,you are a liar!You never tell me the truth!Why!? - Christina's distraught voice was ringing in my head so loud and clear. No medicine could erase that pain of
losing a trust of the person i loved the most.
I could feel that i was awakening. Finally i could move my limbs.
- Thank God... - I heard a soft female voice.
- Water...please... - I was so thirsty and hungry like i've never drunk or eaten.
- Of course!- The blond nurse rushed to me.
I opened my eyes and saw her beautiful glowing face.
- You've been sleeping for 4 days... Dr. Gleeson said that it would be better for you...you had a very intense panic attack. - She was helping me to drink.
- 4 days... - I repeated through my teeth. It sounded unreal.
- Yes. But it's for the better...you know...- Blondie really was trying hard to soothe me.
- Thank you for...this... - I looked at her with gratefulness. My body was sore and numb all at the same time. I couldn't feel my legs but i could move my hands and
head,though it hurt a lot.
- I will get you some food. - The nurse stood up.
- Melly didn't have anybody...who will burry her? - I mumbled,watching the nurse freeze in place.
- I'm sorry for her...she had such a hard life but now...she is in peace. You have to know that you have a lot of people who care about you. Yesterday your friend from
work visited you. - Blondie looked at me with encouragement.
- What friend? - My mind instantly threw me an image of Woz's wrinkled face.
- A tall handsome man. He came by to check on you. A very polite guy. - Just the way she looked at the floor with a smile on her face,i could tell how much she liked
him.
- What was his name? - Burning and stinging feeling in my stomach made me jump up. My legs were too weak so i dropped back in bed.
- Thomas. He was here for less than 2 minutes. Just looked at you as you were sleeping and left. - Blondie's calm voice was hurting my ears.
- He was tall with blue eyes? - I was trying to breathe but my chest got as heavy as a lead.
- Yes. Blue eyes. - She nodded with a happy smile on her face.
I opened my mouth but couldn't say anything. Stahl was here. It wasn't a dream. That's why his touch was warm. In my nightmares his hands were always cold as
ice.
- You are lucky to have such friends... - Blondie winked at me and walked out of the room.
- Dammit...- I hissed through my teeth.
I stood up,remembering my plan with a bug. I started to search for it hastily. My thoughts were scattered,filling up my mind with too many things at once.
I found the bug under the mattress. Thank God,i hid it there.
- He saw me...Ironically enough,i didn't have to pretend to be lost,broken or medicated. Stahl came right in time...Well, he will come back...oh,yes. And
next time i will be ready... - I mumbled under my breath,squeezing the saving bug in my hand so tightly that it hurt.