The Cooper Handyman Gang

Bentley quickly wheeled his chair further away from the door. "I didn't do anything!" he protested, eyes wide.

"That ain't what it sounds like, cher," Lady argued, breaking her staring contest with Sly to grab her own cane. "In fact, sounds like yah threatened her kin. What did you do?"

"Nothing!" Bentley insisted.

Karin stormed into the room, glaive in hand. Her face was stone, but her tail swished behind her in a fury. "You let my son in the same room as Minamoto Ken," she snarled the name like it was a curse word. And with no real signs of warning, she leaped at Bentley, glaive extended to slice him in half.

"Whoa!" Sly said, shoving himself between Karin and Bentley on pure instinct. He didn't know why this felt familiar, but it did. Their staves clanged against one another, ringing like a large bell. She didn't even pause and moved to side step him. But Murray used the distraction time to move their turtle friend out of harm's way, and Lady used the crook of her cane to grab Karin's elbow.

"Lady-san," Karin said, her voice a near-growl.

"The turtle's denser than that shell of his, but he's harmless," Lady said, clapping Karin on the shoulder. The older raccoon was tense, but Lady didn't let it stop her. "Now, he didn' have much of a chance to tell us about this Minamoto fella," she said, pulling Karin towards one of the cushions. "How 'bout you sit down and tell us 'bout him?"

With obvious reluctance, Karin folded her legs to sit on the cushion. Sly didn't relax until she lowered her glaive to rest on the floor. Lady sat down next to her, setting her own cane down nearby so she could have her hands free in case she needed them. That let Sly relax a little into a cushion of his own. Murray set Bentley's chair down, but hovered protectively over his friend.

"The Minamoto clan is a daimyo clan," Karin said slowly. "Whereas my family, the Coppergiwa, follows the way of the noble samurai. We had served many clans over the years, but for all our honor, we reached a time when an alliance became necessary. The Minamoto put up their youngest son, Ken, as an offering for me or one of my sisters, at the same time as a merchant offered his eldest son and heir. As my own father's eldest daughter, it would have been proper for me to marry the noble and bring him into our clan to inherit after my father."

"But proper don' mean right," Lady said softly.

"Yes." Karin's hands fisted in her hakama. "I could see his cruelty, and knew that he would bring nothing but pain and dishonor to my family. And Shinji…" She paused, and a soft, kind smile cross her face, the first any of them had seen of its like. It did wonders for her face, revealing that under the stern mask was a noble beauty. "He did not care that I was too serious, or too mannerly. He just wanted to make me laugh."

Murray sniffled, reaching into his belt pouch and pulling out a handkerchief. "That's so romantic…"

Karin ducked her head in embarrassment, her tail swishing behind her. "My father approved my marriage, and turned down the Minamoto clan," Karin said. "Ken was denied not only my hand, but that of my sisters'. I do not think he has ever forgotten…or forgiven…the perceived slight."

"So now we know a little more about what we are up against, at least in the short term." Sly nodded and clapped his hands. "Meanwhile," he turned on Lady. "You drugged me!?"

Lady rolled her head, looking at him and saying dryly, "You weren' sleepin', sugah. I helped."

"Helped?" he sputtered, "Drugging me is helping now?"

Clearing his throat, Bentley set some of his smaller drones out, creating a holo-table for them to use. If he didn't interrupt now, there was no telling how long the argument between the two raccoons would go. "Anyway," he said pointedly, bringing up some of his pictures. "This is Minamoto Ken, a red panda—"

"That is not a panda," Sly said with a frown, tilting the picture so he could see it better.

"Yes, it is," Bentley said, his eyes narrowing in annoyance.

"Bentley, I know what a panda is, and that is not a panda," Sly argued. They'd had a panda on the team before, really, did Bentley think Sly was that dumb?

"But you also didn' know what an albino raccoon looked like," Lady pointed out sweetly.

Sly glowered at her. Okay, he could believe she thought he was that dumb. "Shut up, Lady."

"Call it like I see it, sugah," she said with a wave of her hand.

Bentley coughed to break up the bickering. "Right now, he appears to be playing both sides," he said. "He's making himself into the hero for the locals, and framing Coopergiwa-san as the culprit. However, nothing appears to be any more than the usual threats Sly's family gets." Bentley steepled his fingers. "We've hit a waiting game. Unless Minamoto increases his aggression or something else appears, nothing here is the event we came looking for."

"Surely, we can do something in the meantime," Sly argued, poking at the various pictures Bentley and Rioichi had taken.

Murray nodded in agreement, and Bentley sighed. "Alright," he grumbled. "Let's work on fixing what's been messed up, which will hopefully improve Coopergiwa-san's reputation, and aggravate Minamoto into acting." He picked a handful of the pictures out and hummed. "Murray, can you still use your Aboriginal Ball Form?"

"Be the Ball, the Murray can do," the hippo said, puffing out his chest.

"Good, then you'll use it to knock down these dams here that are wreaking havoc on the field irrigation systems." Bentley shoved some of the pictures around where Murray could see them. "I'll be your look out, so none of the guards can surprise you, and to keep you from knocking down the ones that are needed."

That left the second set of pictures, which he pushed in Sly's direction. "Sly, you are going to be picking the ronins' pockets. Either they are carrying the villagers' valuables on them, or they are hiding them somewhere. Find them so they can be returned."

"Don' I feel superfluous," Lady grumbled from her seat, crossing her arms and sticking her nose up in the air.

Bentley shot her a look of pure exasperation over his glasses. "Well, do you have thief senses?" he snapped back.

She tilted her head at him. "What?" she said blandly.

"Bentley," Sly hissed in warning.

Not that the turtle was listening, oh no. He rolled his eyes and adjusted his glasses. "Can you sense thieving opportunities? Blue auras?"

"Purple auras," she corrected automatically, and then paused before leaning forward. "Wait, that's what those are?"

Sly slapped his hand over his face. "Thank you, Bentley, for revealing yet more Cooper family secrets. It's not like she's figuring them out on her own fast enough," he said sarcastically.

"I didn't expect her to say yes!" Bentley protested, but now there was a familiar gleam in his eyes. "But this is a good opportunity for some data gathering. I wonder if the different color is from a different thieving family, and if it works differently?"

"I wouldn' know, cher," Lady drawled. "Ain't had a chance to see Sly in action. Just a lot of talk."

The male raccoon glowered at her, flicking his tail behind him. All talk, no action indeed.

"Then you can work alongside him to retrieve the valuables," the turtle said.

Karin snorted, looking between the three of them. "Then I will teach them some techniques that they need," she said firmly.

Bentley raised one finger. "Sly is already a Master Thief, with access to all of his family techniques."

"And while he may be quieter than you or your friend, he cannot cross nightingale floors, and I am not the only one in the village who employs them." Karen's eyes narrowed at Bentley. "The silent hunter eats, Bentley-san." Unsaid it went that he didn't have much room to give her lip.

Beside her, Lady made a chopping motion across her neck, a warning at Bentley to shut up and do as the more traditional lady said.

Swallowing, Bentley pulled his head back into his shell a little. "Agreed," he managed to squeak out.

"Again, Sly-san," Karin barked as the floors gave a series of squeaks under his foot.

Grimacing, Sly didn't bother avoiding the creaks on his way back to the start point. Lady's ears flicked back, but her tail swayed side to side rather than her vocally giving him a hard time. That had passed over an hour ago. Neither of them were doing well at this. While Lady had amazing body memory, reading the floor was difficult for her—she got further each time only because she knew where not to step. Meanwhile, Sly could get a read…but his feet didn't always go where he knew they needed to go.

Karin shook her head, but her shoulders also had a tremor to them. Drat it all, she was trying not to laugh at them! Sly scowled, his tail joining Lady's in swishing. "I think my kits make less noise than you do," she said at last.

Lady snorted, uncrossing her arms and shaking her shoulders loose. "I knew about them, not how to walk on them," she muttered in protest.

"More than I knew," Sly said snidely as Lady took her first step on to the floor.

She turned her head to scoff at him. "Yer ancestor is our teacher, Cooper, did you skip a section in yer precious book?" she drawled back, twisting her body around as she took the next series of steps. She hesitated, and then made a step forward, her first new step. There was silence, and she let out a soft breath. She was about half way across the floor panel now.

"It wasn't in the book!" he snapped at her, crossing his arms in annoyance. His pique rose as she made another lucky guess and got forward again.

Karin hummed from her watching point, sitting in a lotus position as she watched them. "I swore I had already written down the construction of such floors, as well as how to walk them in our book," she said as if musing.

Sly's shoulders rose up closer to his ears. "We're having trouble reading your section," he admitted in a mutter. "Can't tell if it was a transcribing error, or if two books were married together and pieces were lost." It didn't help that Bentley couldn't read the kanji properly, it was a nightmare.

She hummed again, not making a comment. Lady made another guess, and while the creak was nowhere near as loud as any of Sly's, it was still audible.

Karin's ears flicked back and then forward again. "Let us break for tea," she suggested, standing up. "And perhaps some meditation to calm your minds."

"I've never meditated a day in my life," Sly muttered crankily. "That's Murray's bailiwick. I just pick up the skills."

"Well this one ain't that easy, sugah," Lady muttered back, stalking past him and inside.

He scowled at her backside, reluctantly following both women to the kitchen table. Karin whipped together a green tea pretty quickly, setting cylinder-shaped cups in front of both of them as well as herself. Lady at least seemed to like the taste—Sly wasn't sure how he felt about it, but knew better than to ask for water. Up until a certain time in history, the water was not particularly safe to drink, they'd learned the hard way in Galleth's time.

"You each have what the other needs," Karin said at last, looking between them. "Lady knows what her body is doing, from pinkie toe to ear and tail tips. Not a step out of place…once she knows where the places are. Sly has the experience to see the minute differences in the floor, but cannot convince his body where to place his steps." She frowned and tilted her head. "And for some floors, he will not be able to at all."

"What, why?" Sly argued. They were both raccoons, both thieves, but he was a Cooper, a Master Thief! He should be able to do this without any problems once he mastered the skill.

"Because you have six inches and fifty pounds on me, sugah," Lady said drily. "Though I think yah should have more like seventy-five." She gave Karin a significant look. There was no should there, Lady knew. He'd slept in her lap last night, she'd had plenty of time to take in his physical status, and what she saw had her fur itching. Sly was severely underweight under his own fluffy coat.

Frowning, Karin stood up and walked into her pantry. Sly looked between the two females, feeling like he missed some sort of silent conversation. Especially when Karin came back out with a bowl of rice and some smoked fish that she set down in front of him with a pair of chopsticks. He was a little hungry, though, so he accepted the snack.

"So some of the floors won' take yer extra weight, or are spaced so yer broader foot is gonna hit something regardless of how good you are," she said like it was conversational. Lady looked into her tea cup with a frown. "Not that I can see either way…"

Sly frowned around a bite, not sure how to explain how he saw the way the wood fell wrong. Maybe it was something that came from more experience, something Lady would get in time.

…Much like it was going to take more than one day to learn how to place his feet.

Ugh, this was one of those leadership lessons, wasn't it? Grimacing around his chopstick, he stood up with the bowl. "Come on," he grumbled. "We're going to try something."

Raising her brows, Lady gave Karin a polite bow of her head and hurried after Sly. He took the side they had been working from, but sat down with his legs folded. "You walk, I'll help," he said.

"But how will that help me see it for myself?" she protested.

"It won't," he said bluntly. "That's going to take time, walking on different environments. But we'll practice. I need to tone my body memory up to match my eyes, which is also going to take a while. But in the meantime? I can guide you through it."

She narrowed her eyes, her tail twitching behind her, but she started her walk around the boards. When she reached the last place she had been, she turned back to look at him.

Glancing at the floor, he pointed towards her right. "On the right, but skip a step," he advised.

She nodded, and extended her leg in a move that screamed ballet training, re-enforcing to Sly where she had gotten her excellent body awareness. Lady skipped the row he had meant, landing her foot in a safe area and bringing her weight on to the ball of that foot singularly. He stole a bite of food, and continued to give her directions across the tricky layout.

Lady did a back-flip from a standstill—a difficult move that impressed Sly more than he wanted to admit—in order to escape the last foot of squeaky floors. "Well, that's one way around it," she admitted, turning to look at Sly across the six feet of flooring. "But I still want to learn how to see it for my own."

"We'll trade," he said, standing up and licking the last of the rice out of the bowl (to Lady's obvious disgust). He didn't know where the habit came from, it was probably out of Egypt since he didn't usually do it. "You show me how you trained your body to move that precisely, I'll give you ground-reading exercise. Deal?"

She grumbled, but nodded her head in agreement. Finally, unable to take it, she snatched the bowl from him. "For God's sake, ask for seconds," she snapped and stomped inside. Startled, he followed her only to have a second bowl thrust at him while Karin looked on in amusement. He sat back down at the table in befuddled amusement, finishing a second bowl entirely before Lady would even hear of leaving.

They reached the village about the time several loud booms echoed across the village. When Lady looked at Sly, he imagined behind her mask, her eyes were wide. "That is probably Murray and Bentley," he said with a shrug. "Come on, that's going to attract a lot of attention."

She nodded and followed him into the village proper. They stuck to the roofs, following guards. Lady took off on her own a couple of times, always coming back with something in her hands—seeing her own version of thieving auras, no doubt. He would do the same, leaving her to track whoever they were currently following.

Together, they reached the village inn, or at least the people who were housing the extra guards. Sly and Lady circled the building, and she was the one who found an unseen entry point. The rope didn't precisely go to the window in question, but it was close enough that they could both jump the gap on to the sill. She went first to open the window, her mask catching the moonlight a little too much for Sly's sanity. He wanted her inside as fast as he possibly could.

Once both of them were inside, they had to navigate their way down the stairs, to the inner walkways between rooms.

Sly spotted something, and managed to snag Lady's elbow before she got ahead of him. He whispered in her ear, "Floors," and she understood, shuffling in front of him. Quietly, he guided her through, at times hesitating as he was forced to rely on moonlight and the occasional bit of lantern light.

She reached the edge of the floor, and took off at a run for a room to the right. He waited with baited breath, and sighed in relief as she returned with both arms full. At times, she almost stumbled walking back, but he reached out and snagged her by the waist, pulling her to safety.

"Thanks, sugah," she breathed, handing him one of the packages. "Come on, let's get all this loot back."

He took the package in agreement, hurrying them both out of there. Karin joined them on the village edges, and knew who each of the belongings went home to.

At least, until they got to the bottom of Lady's bag. She held up two items with a frown. One some odd blade that Sly couldn't figure out what it was. The other was a string of gold coins, current time currency, with a tag on the end of the ribbon.

"That's a kunai," Lady said helpfully as Sly twisted the blade around in his hand gingerly before handing it towards Karin. "They are known as a ninja's weapon, at least in our time."

"Here as well," Karin agreed, frowning. "But there are no ninja in this village."

"And that's not our biggest problem," Lady said.

"What's worse than ninjas?" Sly asked, half sarcastic.

In response, she held up the tag on the coins for him to see. He tilted his head, and then swallowed thickly. Gears and wings. Clockwerk.

ronin—Masterless samurai, a warrior who doesn't serve any particular daimyo
kunai—Japanese, a throwing knife made out of or to mimic the shape of a trowel that has been weaponized