Author's Note: Thanks for the reviews. I know it has been a bit since I posted and I apologize for that. My ideas have been working over time, my schedule to type out those ideas and post has not. And I realized that as a writer I had restricted myself with a pattern that won't work. Instead of trying to create a story to fit the sequence of the rules, I am going to post a chapter or part that fits the theme of this fic rather than straight lining through the rules. This is about mechanical aliens dealing with humans, either ones they value as their own families like Annabelle or Sam or human culture in general. And the fun that creates. Posts might be shorter but far more often than they have been. Enjoy!

TF TF TF TF TF TF TF TF TF TRANSFORMERS

You know you're addicted to humans when:

1. Your spare leg carry panel contains bottled water, three types of snack bars, a bag of chips, and two of Annabelle's toys. Unless you are Ironhide and it's all toys on the right side, healthy food and water on the left."

The mare under his legs heaved forward, adding yet more speed. The wind whipped by his black armor, whistling like incoming weapons fire. Only no enemies stood in his way, no dying world of rusted slagged metal flew by but an open plain in its vast reach of golden sand and dotted bushes. Crouched low on her neck, his armored hands tightened on her mane, silently urging her to even greater speed. Sage brush became a blur, the scream of an eagle over head lost in the whistle of the wind. Her metal hooves pounded across the landscape, thundering down like vengeance itself. He adjusted, systems compensating for the weight change as she leaped the canyon edge, landing on the other side before rocketing forward. This was how a true warrior lived. Defiant in his courage, free in his choices.

::Barricade! Answer!:: Megatron's comm signal slammed into him with the force of an ion blast. Shuttering his optics, the black and white armored shock trooper refocused. The plain gray walls of his room replaced yellow sands, the blazing sun dimming to indoor lighting of the Decepticon base.

::Yes Lord Megatron?:: His mental tone at least sounded normal, even as his cooling fans whirred. Had he been caught?

::Do you ever answer the intercom? We've been paging you for half a breem! Even Starscream answered quicker than that!:: Megatron

::I was...:: Barricade hesitated while wincing, trying to find the right words. Rule Five of their code of conduct rolled past his optics. "Decepticons shall not waste their time on toys or play things. We are conquerors of the universe and inferior objects are beneath our time and energy. His secret was safe, for now. What he cradled against his chest plate would not be confiscated and smashed, yet. Soon? Not in pit if he had a chance. He'd defect to being a neutral before giving her up. But an upset Megatron meant potential discovery if not handled carefully. ::Recalibrating my weapons locks. Subsonic precision that could not be disturbed::

::Good. You will need them shortly. The human convoy is moving as I predicted. Report to the main entrance and meet up with Ravage and Scorponok to prepare for attack. They are already there:: Megatron snapped the frequency closed, no other words needed.

"It's Ironhide's fault," Barricade muttered into the empty room, his black armored claws carefully gathering the other little pony shapes to one area to be subspaced. "If he hadn't lost these in that attack, I would never have known what they were."

Memory cores flashed open, replaying the terrible fight, neither black armored warrior giving until the chance slash across the weapon's specialist hip armor. The single panel slicing into two, part of it falling away to release a torrent of little shapes. Had he known then, Barricade would never have picked them up after that battle, determining to understand their value at a later date. After all, anything the weapon specialist carried should have had military value. He could not have known they were considered child's play things, unworthy of a Decepticon trooper. Yet the more he studied the small shapes, the more intrigued he got. "Little ponies, each painted differently." Scooped into subspace, they now lay behind a stock of shock grenades in his leg panel. Any bot attempting to steal them would lose a hand, or claws or whatever happened to be on the end of their arm. "But this one," Barricade smiled at the black and purple figure.

She was his favorite, the one he rode in his visions. Metal hooves crushing all beneath her mass, her purple mane and tail flowing like a banner of death as her red eyes mercilessly targeted the weak and inferior. The Decepticon symbol on her right quarter the proud sign of her lineage. The little pony had been painted as an Autobot with blue hooves, bright blue eyes and a red mane with the symbol he hated but a few minutes of his time and paint and now she stood proud. A symbiont worthy of his existence. Carefully, he grasped the shape with his main claws, lifting her up. Balancing on the only shelf in the room, she faced outward as though guarding until his return. He never looked back, marching out the doors to meet the raiding party.

Three minutes later the door slid open. "Barricade! You got yer lazy aft in here? Soundwave says to report to," Rumble began, walking through the doors, unafraid. Barricade treasured his privacy and mechs wound up on their afts back in the hallway, armor smoking or dented from disturbing him. But any action against Rumble, or his fellow Cassettes carried the same danger as attacking his symbiont boss, Soundwave. Even Starscream wasn't that dumb. "Not here. Figures. I walk all the way down the corridor for nothing! What is that?" Red optics focused on the little figure. Intrigued, he jumped onto the recharge berth to take it with him. "Perhaps Lazerbeak will know. Nah. I'll keep it for now. Research it myself. Hmm, Barricade might miss it. Better make a copy and put this one back. Why should he get all the good stuff?"

to be continued...

Author's Note: I could not resist the image of Barricade playing with a Decepticon my Little Pony figure. Annabelle would have had them, carried by Ironhide then stolen after a battle. It was painted as an Autobot one before Barricade changed it.