Chapter 26 Memory Lane

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And don't you forget it!

Finally on to the good stuff…

Chapter 26: Memory Lane

Bella POV

"I don't see the point Bella. We don't need therapy. I don't know how many times I have to apologize to you or how long I need to grovel at your feet over some fucking strippers. But couples therapy is not going to happen so drop it." Edward said angrily as he stormed out of the room.

"We'll see about that." I muttered under my breath. Scowling, I watched his retreating form exit our bedroom.

3 days later….

Edward POV

I was dragging my feet to this appointment. My wife, oh so thoughtfully created an appointment for couples therapy… without my knowledge. I love Bella which should be abundantly clear since I'm about to sit through this session for her. Apparently we have communication issues. Which brings us to where we are now, standing outside of Dr. Lestrange's office.

I rose my hand to knock on the office door when Dr. Lestrange opened the door for us mid knock.

"Welcome, welcome. Ah, Edward so nice of you to join us this week. Bella had mentioned that you were… hesitant." Dr. Lestrange said as she motioned for Bella and I to take a seat on her leather couch. She smoothed out her pencil skirt and pulled out one of the many pens that were stuck in her wild unruly hair. Sitting across from us in a big plush chair she was ready with her pen and notebook.

"Let's begin. Edward after speaking with Bella she said that she felt there was a disconnect between the pair of you. I already know a little but since I cannot speak about Bella's private therapy sessions I'm going to have Bella talk as if I'm clueless. Anyway, ladies first, Bella can you tell me a little bit about what you believe is the reason you and Edward are having trouble communicating?"

"I feel that ever since I had that overdose a few months back… Edward has shut down on me. Especially when it comes to his job which is a huge part of his life. He treats me like I could snap any moment. And the 'business' is changing. I can see him carry all these burdens on his own. It makes me feel like I'm another burden he has to carry. It makes me feel like a failure as a wife." Bella said sniffling as tears poured down her cheeks. She expertly wiped the tears away without smudging her eyeliner.

Hearing her words and how she felt was like someone dumping a bucket of ice water on me. It was sobering and left me feeling conflicted. I hadn't realized I was ignoring or neglecting her.

"Is that true Edward? Did Bella's overdose alter the way you view your wife?" Dr. Lestrange asked looking up at me from her notepad.

I didn't know what to say or even how I felt. In my peripheral vision I could see Bella looking down at her lap. Her head was hung in shame. I wanted to comfort her but I didn't know how or what I should do.

Dr. Lestrange took my silence as her answer and pushed forward.

"Edward, I have heard about the night Bella overdosed from her point of view. But I would really appreciate if you told us what happened that night from your perspective. I think it would be beneficial for you and Bella. From what she has told me, the people around her, being her friends and family try to act like it… never happened."

"Maybe because I want to forget it happened! I saw my wife's heart stop in front of me three times! Three times! she died!" I shouted at Lestrange unable to even think of that night. Bella's blue lips and cold hands still plague my dreams.

"Therapy was a horrible idea. The only thing that happens when dredging up the past up is reopening that hurt and pain. Come on Bella were leaving." I said walking to her office door so I could storm out.

"Ignoring the problem never solves anything." Dr. Lestrange said as I left her office.

*Liam POV*

I had just walked back into my apartment after a long weekend of having my ass kidnapped and kicked by James in a warehouse we owned. I looked around at my apartment which looked like a tornado ran through it. Sighing, I limped my way over to the fridge. I opened the fridge door and grabbed a pack of steaks that were about to go out of date. Cutting open the package I grabbed one of the thick cut steaks and set it on my bloody blackened eye. Hopefully the swelling would go down some so I could see out of it again. I put the rest of the steaks back in the fridge and plopped down on the couch. I sat up a little when I felt something hard poking me in the back. It was a unopened USPS box. I read the front of the box.

To: Liam Cullen

From: Tris Eaton

Eaton? Huh... guess she married Tobias already. Curious as to what she would send me I threw the steak down on the coffee table and ripped open the box. The box contained a letter and the engagement ring I had given her. I set the ring box beside me and opened the letter.

Liam,

If your reading this you've finally done something right! Shocking isn't? As you might have noticed on my return label I married Tobias! I just wanted to thank you for having the balls to stand up to your father. Sincerely. Maggie was hoping you would go against him once you found out about her and the babies. She asked me to give you her email address. Just a piece of advice… Don't fuck this up you retard! And lay off the booze!

Maggie. Fitzpatrick nargle. net

-Tris Eaton

Huh… she used a nargle email address. These addresses couldn't be traced from an IP address or pinged by satellite. Most people didn't even know this sort of thing exist. We used nargle to communicate with other crime families and the dirty politicians on our payroll. The emails were encrypted. It was perfect for keeping information from nosey do-gooder government officials.

But she had sent me her email which filled me with hope for the first time in many weeks. By my calculations Maggie should be almost halfway through her pregnancy. I've been secretly following her pregnancy with an app I downloaded that tells you what part of the baby forms each week and roughly the size of the babies. She is 18 weeks. If it's a boy or girl their genitalia is moving to it's correct position and each baby should weigh 3 to 5 oz. It's quite amazing.

I catch myself staring longingly at pregnant women in the city. That is usually when I go and lose myself in the bottom of a bourbon bottle. But all that was going to change. I'm going to be a father soon and I'm not going to let Maggie come back just to give her a reason to run again.

Maybe what I had needed all along was James beating my ass. I chuckled darkly and then winced in pain. I reached over and picked the steak up off the coffee table placing it back over my eye. I laid back on the couch and closed my eyes trying to think of what I would say to Maggie when I emailed her later.

Edward POV

The ride back from our therapy session was spent in silence. Once we were home Bella said nothing and went straight to the fridge for a chilled bottle of wine. She swiftly removed the cork and poured a generous amount in her crystal wine glass. If I remember correctly it was part of a set that was gifted to us at our wedding.

This had become a normal for us. Wine for her, scotch for me. The only times we met together was for sex after we had gotten nice and buzzed.

I knew our married life was unhealthy. I knew Dr. Lestrange was right. I knew we needed to talk about that night. I still didn't know if Bella meant to take that many pills or if was an accident. I never asked, afraid of what she would say. I passed Bella in the kitchen and kissed her forehead then headed to my study. I sat down in my plush chair, scotch in hand, and forced myself to relive that night.

*FLASHBACK 4 1/2 MONTHS AGO…*

Tonight did not go well. What was suppose to be a peaceful negotiation over territories between our family and Riddle's family ended in a blood bath. Tom Marvolo Riddle. The only reason he wasn't rotting in a prison cell was because he owned more judges and cops than we did. He was our greatest rival. Although, he didn't hold an emphasis on family the way we did. He murdered his father to become the head of his family and his first command as head was to have his first wife murdered. His warehouse has held more skeletons than a cemetery. Most people have never heard of him. He plays in the shadows, under the radar, and if they have heard of him they only know him by his alias with a name most people don't dare to whisper, Voldemort.

I have never personally met him. His second in command is usually the one we meet with, Fenrir Greyback. A dangerous man in his own right. Very shifty mother fucker.

I sighed pulling into my driveway. Bella and the girls had just been told about the organization just a few days ago. They were told the night Maggie left. I think the girls had been more shocked than anything. Although, Bella has been giving me the silent treatment for the past 3 days now. I groaned getting out of my car. I had been one of the lucky ones and only been shot once. Thankfully it was only a graze on my thigh. Emmett had been shot in the shoulder protecting our father. Five of our men had died and we had only managed to take out four of Riddle's guys. Like I said before… tonight was shit.

I unlocked the door and limped toward my study. I headed straight for the scotch. I lowered myself into my chair, scotch in hand when I heard a loud crash upstairs. Despite the pain in my thigh I sobered quickly and had my gun aimed to kill.

"Bella?" I called out.

I didn't hear an answer and hobbled as quickly and quietly as I could up the stairs. Nothing could have prepared me for what I saw once I entered our bedroom.

Bella was lying facedown in the floor. Broken glass and pills were haphazardly laying beside her. I rushed to her and flipped her over some of the glass was embedded in her skin and the smell of vodka stung my nose. Her lips were starting to turn blue. I checked her pulse and got nothing. Immediately I started doing chest compressions and told that Google home device that Bella had recently purchased to call an ambulance.

"Calling… 9-1-1" the computerized voice spoke.

"911 what's your emergency?"

"I need help. I think my fiancée has overdosed. I'm doing CPR but it's not working."

"We have your address and the paramedics are in route. Keep doing the chest compressions. I will stay on the line until the paramedics arrive."

I administered the chest compressions like a robot. I was on auto pilot. I hadn't even noticed the paramedics arrival until they moved me out of the way.

"Sir I need you to move so I can help her."

I moved to the side of the room and laid helplessly against the wall. Another paramedic kneeled in front on me.

"She's in cardiac arrest. Get the defibrillator. And go on my signal."

"Sir are you alright?" I looked at the paramedic in front of me like he was retarded forgetting the blood that was on my clothing.

"I was mugged earlier." I said lamely. The paramedic looked skeptical but let it go.

In the background I could hear them working on Bella.

"Okay. Go again at a higher charge in 3-2-1…clear."

I could see Bella's petite body lift off the ground from the shock of the defibrillator.

"Nothing. Let's go once more same charge in 3-2-1... clear."

"I've got a pulse. Let's give her oxygen and get her on the gurney and to the truck."

Everything seemed like it was going very quickly after that. Before I knew it I was sitting in the back of the paramedic truck headed to the hospital.

We were blowing through a red light when it happened for the second time.

"She's going back into cardiac arrest."

My heart was beating so hard I could feel the percussion in my eardrums.

"Starting chest compressions now."

I could see Bella's lips starting to turn blue again.

"Get the defibrillator."

My heart was racing and hers was non-existent.

"3-2-1… clear."

The next two seconds had felt like a lifetime.

"Okay she's back. I've got a pulse."

I felt myself take in the breath I had been holding.

As soon as we arrived at the hospital Bella was taken back to the ER.

"Sir you can't be in here." A older man with short black hair said.

"The hell I can't. That's my fiancée. I'm Edward fucking Cullen!"

"And I'm Dr. fucking Dean Thomas! You still can't be back here. Look we are doing what we can for your fiancée. Right now she's being treated for over dose. Protocol to follow would be a stomach pump to get out whatever we can. But I can't help her and argue with you. If you stay then you better be out of the way otherwise you can deal with security."

I said nothing and stood to the side as the doctor and nurses worked around Bella. The nurses looked at me curiously with the blood on my shirt.

Fuck, I need some clothes.

"Paramedics said she's flatlined twice already." One of the nurses told the doctor.

"Okay do we know what she took?"

"The paramedics suspect it was a mixture of vodka and Xanax. A prescription bottle was found laying by her."

"Edward? Do you know why she was taking Xanax?" Dr. Thomas asked.

I shook my head in the negative.

"They brought the bottle with them. The Xanax was prescribed to a Victoria. Victoria Hunter." The nurse, wanna-be detective added.

"Do you know this person?" Dr. Thomas asked while looking at the bottle in a plastic bag.

I nodded.

"It's her, it's Bella's best friend."

"Can you call her or give the number to a nurse. This friend might know more information. I can treat Bella now but later we will need to know if this was a suicide attempt so she can be treated emotionally as well."

Suicide.

Suicide.

I hadn't even thought that Bella might have done this on purpose. I felt bile start to rise up my throat.

"I'll go call her."

My chest felt like it was going to close in on me. The pressure was so fierce.

I shakily pulled out my phone and called James.

After 3 rings he answered.

"Hey man. Everything good? Victoria is between wanting to baby me and murder me."

"James. I need you to do me a favor. I need… I need you to call my mom and dad. And I need some clothes. I'm at the hospital. I-I I came home and found Bella on the floor. I th-think she tried to, to k-ki-kill herself. She overdosed on Xanax. Xanax she got from Victoria. The doctors want to question her about Bella."

There was silence on the other end and I checked my phone to make sure he was still on the line.

"Shit. She's okay though right?"

"She's alive at the moment. Her heart has already stopped twice though."

"Fuck. Okay. We're on our way."

"Thanks."

In a rare moment he gave me comfort like only family could.

"Hang in there, I love you cuz."

The line went dead. And I rushed back in to be with Bella.

As I entered her room I could see people shuffling around.

"Let's do it again. Higher charge. 3-2-1… clear. Come on Bella. Come on. Stay with us."

"I've got a pulse. It's steady." A nurse called out.

"Good girl." Dr. Thomas said breathing out a sigh of relief.

And that was the third time she died on me. Her lips were still a bluish purple.

Dr. Thomas turned around and looked from me to Bella and sighed.

"Edward, while you are here. I need to talk to you. Can we go somewhere private?"

"She just died again! I'm not leaving her. I shouldn't have left her in the first place to make that stupid call!" I shouted.

I saw the doctor give the nurses a look and one by one they exited the ER room leaving only Bella, Dr. Thomas and myself.

"Okay then, So due to your fiancées multiple cardiac arrest relapses… I think the best course of action would be to put Bella in an induced coma. This will help her heal from the trauma her body and brain has undergone. I would like your permission to administer pentobarbital, it is a common drug used to induce a coma. During the coma we will place her on life support in case her heart stops again. But if we don't induce the coma there is a very real chance she could go into cardiac arrest again and without proper rest she could wake up with limited or without any brain activity. Edward I know this is a tough decision but this type of thing is unfortunately time sensitive. So we would need that paper signed as soon as possible. I don't know if this will comfort you but if it was my wife I would sign and I can lose my license for telling you that."

"Where do I need to sign?"

Dr. Thomas handed me a clipboard with a sheet of paper on it. I used the pen connected to the clipboard to sign a piece of paper that determined Bella's future as well as my own.

"Will she wake up from the coma?"

"There is always a possibility she never wakes up. But I think her chances of waking up are very good. I think she will wake up when she's ready. I know it's asking a lot but try to have some faith." Dr. Thomas patted my shoulder; took the clipboard and left the room leaving Bella and I alone.

A few minutes later the nurses poured back into the room along with Dr. Thomas.

"Edward we're about to place Bella on life support and then administer the pentobarbital to induce her. Then we will get Bella set up in a better room in the intensive care unit. We are going to ask you to leave now and from what I hear you have a flock of family filling up the waiting room. Go see your family. I will walk Bella to the ICU personally. She is in good hands."

I leaned down and kissed Bella's forehead. My chest constricted painfully. I gave Dr. Thomas a half smile and glanced at Bella once more before heading toward the waiting room to see my family and hopefully get some answers from Victoria.

I entered the waiting room and was immediately assaulted with a tiny body wrapped around my waist.

"How is she? How are you? I brought you a change of clothes and called our publicist. I told them to issue a statement saying Bella was in the hospital due to food poisoning. Hopefully knowing that she is here and knowing a reason will keep them away from finding out the truth."

"It's good to see you too Alice, and thank you."

She released me and my mom engulfed me in a hug. Followed by my dad and Emmett who I was surprised to see here.

"How's the shoulder?"

"It's nothing. How are you?"

"All things considering… not so good."

He nodded his head in sympathy. I gathered everyone to a small corner of the waiting room and filled them in on what had happened starting with the loud crash I had heard upstairs. Leading up to the most recent events being Bella in a induced coma.

"Oh my goodness. We need to call Renee and Charlie." My mother said.

Shit I had forgotten about them.

What the hell do I say to them?

"We will call them but first I need to speak to Victoria, Rose, and possibly Hermione. I need to know if Bella had said anything or done anything, anything that would make her want to end her life." They believe this was a suicide attempt.

A second rarity of the night happened.

Victoria cried. Tears poured out of her eyes like a leaky faucet. Rose sobbed beside her.

"It's because of that night. That night Alice and Maggie were in that car accident." Rose shouted.

Victoria gave her a death glare and started speaking.

"Something had happened to us. We were chased by men and in ourr fright we ran into an alleyway. Bella has been having panic attacks since that night. I gave her some Xanax to help her cope with her anxiety. I never thought she would miss use it. I promise I didn't know."

Rosalie looked like she wanted to say something but kept her mouth closed.

"Why didn't you tell us before? What happened to the men?"

"They kept running past the us. We were just being paranoid and didn't have a reason to bring it up. Nothing happened."

Liar.

I looked at my dad and he looked at me thinking the same thing. She lied straight to my face. Kept eye contact. Her eyes didn't dilate or shift. She didn't fidget. If I didn't know the truth I would believe her. She was quite convincing. James looked at her with a mixture and awe and fear knowing his future wife is a fantastic liar.

It was six days. Six days of waiting until Bella's eyes fluttered open. I had come to terms with it and contacted an associate of ours. A phycologist Dr. Bellatrix Lestrange to help Bella cope with her 'anxiety'. I believe Bella saw Victoria murder Laurent and had post traumatic stress disorder because of it.

*END OF FLASHBACK*

A tap on my study door brought me back from that horrible night. I would even go as far to say it was the worst night of my life.

Bella popped her head in asking if she could enter. I nodded and gestured to a seat across from me. She sat down and placed her wine glass on my desk after taking a large gulp.

"I know that night must have been hard for you. But it happened. I hate everyone acting weird around me. Especially you. There are things that you don't know. Reasons I did what I did."

Shit she did it on purpose…

"Bella let me stop you there. I know why you did what you did. Victoria thinks she's so clever but I know she killed Laurent and that's why you tried to hurt yourself. You're so pure and good. And I know she has forbidden you and Rose to talk about it. You don't have to cover for her Baby. You can tell me."

Bella's eyes started to glaze over.

"So pure and good." I heard her chuckle darkly.

"You know nothing. Victoria is protecting me. Not herself."

"What do you mean?" I asked slowly.

"It was me. I killed Laurent. You all blamed Victoria and she didn't do shit. I'm the murderer."

I went back to all the times we had assumed it was Victoria. We had just let it go and stopped asking.

"The night I overdosed was the same day you introduced me to my new bodyguard."

Riley.

"When I saw Riley I recognized him immediately. And everything came crushing down on me. After my overdose I confessed everything to him. Because of me he lost a dear friend. I mean yeah, before it was hard. I had known that I killed someone. But that day I knew not only had I killed someone, I killed someone who was there to protect me. I felt like a fucking monster. Not so good or pure."

"Bella that's not tr.."

"Please, let me finish. Between Riley and Dr. Lestrange I have come to terms with it. I don't feel so monstrous anymore. But I had to forgive myself and be forgiven before I had closure. Dr. Lestrange told me I should tell you the truth. But I was scared to tell you. Scared of what you would think of me. And I didn't try to kill myself. I just wanted it to go away. The guilt I felt. I wanted to feel numb. I wanted to close my eyes without seeing Laurent's face."

"I'm sorry you felt like you couldn't tell me. I haven't been around to give you many chances to tell me either. I was just afraid that you tried to kill yourself because you couldn't stand to be with a criminal. I also thought you had PTSD over seeing someone being killed. Not doing the killing. In the spirit of sharing… after I had killed for the first time I puked on my dad's Italian dress shoes. I would have nightmares about it too. So I know it can be hard on your mental psych."

"How long did it take you to get over it?" Bella asked.

"It's more like I killed until it didn't phase me any longer. Not that I suggest that for you."

I walked over to her and pulled her up into my arms. I held her tightly against me and felt relief knowing what had truly happened. At least we know that girls can keep a secret.

3rd POV

She sat at the large dinner table. Her husband and she were celebrating 25 years of marriage. She looked lovingly at her son and his wife as they laughed at the story her husband was telling them. They seemed so carefree in the moment. Her husband took her hand and kissed it. The same hand which housed her wedding rings. She looked down at her wedding rings and her wedding day started to replay in her mind.

25 years ago…

Her wedding dress fit perfectly. She looked like a vision in her ivory satin gown which had a long flowing train. Flowery lace and delicate beadwork adorned the bodice. The gown hung off her shoulders and had puff sleeves (the iconic bridal look of the 80's).

Now, one would normally argue that this should be the happiest day of your life but for her it was like judgement day. When she looked in the mirror she didn't see a beautiful blushing bride but a disgusting traitor. Already disloyal to her intended husband. Disloyal to her maid of honor and best friend whose fiancée she had the affair with.

The only trace left of their affair was a child currently growing in her womb. Thinking of the positive pregnancy test she had taken earlier that morning was enough to set off the nausea she was already feeling. She didn't know what she should do for her heart was torn belonging to both her intended and the man she had the affair with. After emptying her stomach for the millionth time she felt her best friend and maid of honor kneel down beside her where she was dry heaving into a toilet and rub circles on her back in a comforting gesture. At her best friends gentleness and the guilt she was feeling, she sobbed.

"It's okay. Don't cry or you will ruin your makeup. I know you are scared but everything will work out. You'll see." Her best friend said in a soothing tone.

She stood up and carefully wiped the tears away. She straightened her gown and took one last look in the mirror. She made a decision. She couldn't brake the heart of her best friend or fiancé by telling them of her heinous act of infidelity. She would tell her fiancée she got pregnant on their wedding night and take this dark secret to her grave.

Her husband pulled her back to the present when he placed a kiss to her temple.

"Happy anniversary Narcissa."

She gave him a warm smile. After 25 years the guilt was slightly easier for her to manage.

"Happy anniversary Lucius."

IMPORTANT!

okay my last chapter only got two reviews. If I don't get more I will assume you guys don't care for the story and I will stop wasting my time writing it. I mean its fun to write but I don't have to keep updating if you guys are bored with it. So if I don't see some reviewing I'm going to finish the story in the next chapter. And it won't be pretty. It will simply answer and tie up all the unanswered questions. 177 people follow this story. I'm not asking for a lot. Only like 10 reviews. But I do have other projects in mind.