Keith watched helplessly as the door closed slowly, painfully, between him and Lance, plunging the room into a deafening silence. He tipped forwards, his arms colliding harshly with the closed door. The impact reverberated through his entire body. Giving in to gravity, he let his knees crash onto the floor, causing a pain he was too numb to feel.

Now that Lance had left, he felt an emptiness, and he realised that from this moment forwards, he was alone- alone in leaving his room, alone in the hallway, alone in facing the others and having to act as if everything is normal, usual, regular, the same as it had been the previous day. At least until tonight. Keith let a delicate smile grace his lips at the thought of another night with Lance in his bed, maybe a night of him in Lance's. He let the memory of Lance's body on his consume him wholly, let it spill into his veins and destroy any sense of dread or doubt.

Grabbing the doorknob, Keith pulled himself off the floor, steadying himself with a few quick breaths. He turned the knob slowly, calmly, before stepping out into the hallway. Although just a step, it felt as if he had moved a great distance, as if he had reached a great milestone in his journey to the kitchen, to the other paladins. Squaring his shoulders, Keith smiled to himself, feeling a sense of great accomplishment blossom in his chest. Only moments ago, this had felt impossible, and now he was standing out in the hallway, beyond the safety and sanctuary of his room. He was here, and he was fine.

The door clicked shut behind him, drawing him out of his internal monologue and back into reality. Keith suddenly realised that he was just standing, frozen, before his closed bedroom door, and how strange such an image would appear if anyone happened to be wandering the halls. Hurriedly, Keith collected his thoughts, shoving them into the furthest corners of his mind (particularly those about a certain blue paladin that refused to be put away). He straightened his jacket, adjusted his gloves, and took off down the hall, his stride a bit too long and his pace a bit too fast. Only when he reached the entrance to the kitchen did he slow down and allow his mind a moment to catch up with his body. He doubled over, panting, hands on knees, panic washing over his entire being.

Keith stayed like this for several minutes, hoping that Lance would walk up behind him, place a hand on the small of his back, and whisper soft reassurances in his ear. Then he would seize Keith's chin delicately between his fingers, and press their lips together, before pushing him into the kitchen to face the other paladins. In that case, his mind would be too hazy, too full of Lance to even allow room for the dread he felt coursing through his body now.

But the rational part of his brain knew that he would have to do this alone. It was commonplace for Lance to miss a meal occasionally (Keith dreaded those days, when Lance would shut himself in his room. He always felt the overwhelming desire to console the blue paladin, to embrace him and shower him with reassurance and encouragement. Now, he realised, he finally could.), however Keith had never done so. In fact, the red paladin was usually the most punctual, aside from Shiro- the first to arrive and the first to leave. His tardiness was already incredibly out of character, and cause for suspicion. He hoped that his delay and Lance's absence were not enough for the others to suspect anything had happened. There was one paladin in particular who possessed the brains to put two and two together and figure out that the occurrences were linked. But surely she had been here, with Hunk and Shiro, or else fiddling with some computer in her room. She had no reason to think that he and Lance had been together last night and this morning, no evidence to support any suspicion she may have.

Having finally convinced himself that no one could possibly know, Keith straightened and reached for the handle that would open the door the kitchen, the only thing between him and the other paladins. He took a deep breath before grasping the knob, turning it slowly and pushing the door-

"Keith!"

The sudden sound of a voice behind him made Keith jump, slip, and collide roughly with the ground, sending a piercing pain through his body. Groaning, he peered over to the source of the voice, only to see Pidge standing above him, holding out her hand. Her expression was a curious blend of worried and mischievous. Keith recognised the two emotions separately, however had never seen such a fusion of both on one face. Never had he wished he knew what someone was thinking as much as now.

Taking her hand, Keith hauled himself to his feet. He made a great fuss of adjusting and dusting non-existent dirt off his clothes, his eyes looking anywhere but Pidge's face. Now that she knew Keith was unharmed, her lips had slipped into a playful grin, one she wore whenever she knew something that someone else didn't (which was very often).

"You're very late, Keith," Pidge tutt-tutted, shaking her head in disappointment.

Keith plastered on his usual bored expression, responding with a shrug before turning back to the door. Inhaling sharply, he seized the handle again, his arms quivering slightly. It took several moments of convincing before he opened the door and stepped into the kitchen.

Pidge studied him closely, noting his hesitation and the way his entire body trembled as he entered the room. Her face contorted in mock sympathy before her wicked smile returned. She skipped happily past him, turning the corner to where Hunk and Shiro were finishing preparations for lunch. She noted that Allura and Coran had joined them and were seated at the table, eagerly awaiting the delicious meal Hunk had concocted. Only five plates had been prepared, meaning that neither Keith nor Lance had been catered for. Pidge's smile split wider.

"Keith's here," she declared as she entered the room. Shiro lifted his head in recognition, and Hunk sighed as he immediately began preparing another plate.

Almost on cue, Keith sauntered into the room, trying desperately to conceal the panic and confusion twisting itself into a knot in his stomach. He fought to keep his expression neutral, bored, as he joined the Alteans seated at the table.

"How come you've arrived so late, Keith?" Allura asked, her brilliant accent doing nothing to soothe the fear coursing through his body. He merely shrugged again, not trusting himself to speak. Allura rolled her eyes.

"Well, I'm glad you decided to join us."

Keith smiled meekly and nodded. Allura and Coran returned to their previous conversation, discussing something that sounded distinctly foreign and alien that Keith had absolutely no knowledge of. He gave up trying to decipher their words, instead deciding to listen in to the conversation in the kitchen.

"I also saw Lance heading to his room." Keith's ears immediately focussed when he heard Lance's name. He felt a sudden, overwhelming sense of joy, followed by dread. If Pidge had seen Lance leaving Keith's room, then they had definitely been found out. He could only hope that Pidge wouldn't tell the others.

Keith heard Hunk's gruff sigh from the kitchen. "Is he coming, too? Because I don't want to make another plate and put everything away, and then have to get it all out again to make another plate for him."

Pidge made a simple sound as if to say "I don't know" before grabbing three plates and making her way over to the table. Hunk dismissed her with an exasperated groan. Untying his apron, Hunk left the kitchen, apparently taking it upon himself to ask Lance. Shiro retrieved his own plate and joined the others at the table.

Keith's heartbeat quickened at the thought of Lance joining them for lunch, having to act as if everything was normal when he's right there. As much as he desperately wished to see Lance, he prayed that he would decline Hunk's offer and stay in his room so that he would not have to see him and pretend that he still despised him, that they were still enemies. That would be too difficult.

They ate in complete silence, the only sound being forks scraping on plates and an occasional hum of satisfaction. Hunk had prepared lasagne, which he had still managed to make completely delicious even when using alien ingredients. The meal was consumed quickly, with Keith and Shiro finishing in mere minutes.

That was all the time Keith needed to convince himself that he needed to talk to Shiro. He felt an impossible weight pressing down on his chest, and knew the only way to lighten the load was to tell someone about what he was feeling. Shiro had acted as Keith's brother almost his entire life, and had been more like family to him than his actual biological family. Keith knew that Shiro would be extremely understanding, and would be able to help him through the hurricane of emotions confined within his head, desperate for release.

So, as they excused themselves from the table and made their way to the kitchen to rinse off their dishes, Keith grabbed Shiro's arm a little too tightly and whispered, just loud enough for Shiro to hear; "Can we talk?"