Chapter 4: Broken Pieces
-C-S-
"Rukia." It was said softly, barely above a whisper, but she heard it nonetheless. Looking up from where she had been showing Shiro her Chappy collection, Rukia saw Ichigo standing in the doorway. Shiro followed her gaze, then jumped up to run over and cling onto Ichigo.
"Ichi-nii! Is everything okay? You look tired." Shiro's excitement almost instantly turned to worry at seeing Ichigo.
"It's- I'm alright. But I do need to talk to you. It's something important." Ichigo sat across from him, and Rukia scooted out of the way to listen.
"You asked why no one else had masks. The answer is, everyone here is a Shinigami, even me. But you're not a Shinigami. Do you know what you are?"
"No." Ichigo reached over and gently pulled Shiro's shirt collar open, revealing the hole punched in his chest.
"What is this?" Ichigo asked, placing a hand over the hole.
"It's a... hole?" The childish tone vanished from his voice as his tone turned serious. "But don't only Hollows have holes in their chest?"
"Yeah. But Hollow is only part of what you are. What do you think of this sword?" Ichigo took Shiro's blade and placed it between them.
"This is me- uh, I mean- my sword?" Shiro paused, confused by his own words.
"This is you?" Ichigo prompted.
"Yeah- no. It is, but I'm here. But it is me!" Shiro insisted. "I'm a Hollow, but that sword is me too! I'm a Hollowfied Zanpakuto!" He finally figured it out. "I'm your zanpakuto."
"There you go, you got it." Ichigo said proudly.
Shiro fell silent for a moment, then asked, "Where's Ossan? Why is he not here with us?"
"He's in our inner world, where you should be too. You should be with him."
"Oh yeah, cause he's.. part of me… but he's a Zanpakuto? But that's-I'm the opposite of him."
'Together, Shirogetsu and Kurogetsu become Zangetsu.' A memory flashed through his head.
"We're Zangetsu, your Zanpakuto." A barrier had broken, and more memories quickly followed. Shiro lowered his head groaning, pieces of memory snapping into place and causing a headache. There was still so much missing, but a small part had been restored.
"Shiro, are you okay?" Ichigo asked.
"Shut up, Ichigo." He snapped. Rukia opened her mouth to scold him, surprised by the personality change, but Ichigo held up his hand to stop her.
"Since when do I ever listen to you?" He retorted. "Are you yourself now?"
"I said shut up. God you're annoying." Shiro looked back up at them, clearly annoyed.
"Welcome back, Shirogetsu." Ichigo gave a small smile which was returned with a scowl. Funny how their usual expressions were swapped. Shirogetsu sheathed his sword as he stood, prompting Ichigo and Rukia to do the same. He touched the shard of bone on his face, which dissolved into black reishi with a tearing motion.
"So you remember everything now? You're his Zanpakuto again?" Rukia asked.
"Everything's there, and most of it fits together. There are still a few things that aren't quite right, but for the most part I'm fine. Wha-? Hey, no!" The child size Hollow protested when Rukia suddenly picked him up to study the newly personified Chibi Hollow.
"Ichi-nii~ get me down!" Shirogetsu whined, then covered his mouth when he realized what he had done.
Ichigo laughed lightly, amused by the childish tone, as he retrieved the child and set him back on the floor. "Guess that's one thing that still hasn't been fixed. You may be Shirogetsu again, but you're still a kid right now. You're not gonna get back to normal that quickly."
"I said I'm fine! I'm not a kid, and I won't act like one." He crossed his arms and glared at Ichigo, expressing his frustration.
"Right now you are, at least physically. And even though you have most of your memory and personality back, you still have some of the childlike mentality. You're not yourself just yet."
"I don't care! The only difference right now is size, I'll be back to normal soon enough." The indignation turned to anger. "But you know what? This is your fault! If you hadn't gotten yourself caught, we wouldn't have been split and I wouldn't have had to risk my neck saving you! And then I wouldn't be like this!" Furious tears welled up in his eyes, angering him further.
"And now because of this stupid childish form, I can't even control how my body reacts." Shiro wiped the offending tears away with his sleeve, before turning his back to them and sitting down to sulk.
"Shiro." Ichigo called, but received no response. "Shirogetsu. I know you're upset, but this isn't something we could have seen coming. And sitting there pouting isn't going to make things any better. I'm going to need you to help solve this." Ichigo knelt beside him as he talked.
"Ichi…" Shiro turned and buried himself in Ichigo's arms, holding tight and allowing his childish self to cry out his frustration.
-C-S-
Ichigo closed the door behind him as they stepped out into the hall. "I want to visit the SRDI. Maybe we can find some clues there."
"But Ichigo," Rukia began, "Unohana Taichou and the Onmitsukido have already investigated. What could we possibly find that they didn't? Besides, the labs have probably been restricted access by now."
"I don't know." Ichigo admitted. "But I still want to go. And I'm part of this case, I don't see why they wouldn't let me in."
"I suppose. You probably shouldn't take Shiro though. We don't know which mindset he'll be in. If he's normal it would be fine, but if he switches back to being a child it could cause a lot of trouble if it scares him going back to the place this all started."
"Yeah, you're right. Would it be alright if we left Shiro here? He seemed to like Jushiro."
"I'm sure Ukitake Taichou would love to babysit for a bit, as long as he's not busy. He's always loved children."
"Alright. I would like to go sooner rather than later, so let's go ask him." Ichigo stepped back into Rukia's room, calling Shiro over to him.
"Rukia and I have to go on an errand, do you want to stay with Jushiro for a bit?" Shiro nodded silently, worn out from crying earlier.
"Let's go then." They started walking, Shiro shying away from Ichigo and clinging to Rukia instead. A few minutes later they had found Jushiro, and left Shiro with him. Finally they were on their way to the SRDI, hopefully to find some answers.
-C-S-
In the end, the visit had proven fruitless. While they had been allowed in, they hadn't found anything of use or interest. Now they were on their way back walking through Seireitei, but it was a slow trip. Ichigo kept falling behind, and Rukia would have to stop and wait for him. After stopping one more time for him to catch up, she turned back and took a long look at him.
"Are you okay? You don't look so good." Rukia stated, observing his pale face and ragged breathing.
"I thought I was, but I really don't know. Since we left, I've been getting sharp pains in my head." Ichigo winced and rubbed his head as another pain shot through.
"They seem to be getting worse. I should probably head back. I think-" He was suddenly cut off when he stumbled and collapsed in the snow.
"Ichigo!" Rukia immediately knelt down to check on him. His breathing was still ragged and shaky, and a cold sweat had broken out. She tried to help him back up, but his legs couldn't support him.
"You look like you could use some help." Shunsui had been passing by and saw them go down.
"Captain Kyoraku! Ah- no, we're fine-"
"Ah, let me see him." Shunsui draped his pink kimono over Ichigo before easily lifting Ichigo onto his back.
"Hey!" Ichigo protested a moment, before reluctantly settling down against the Captain's warm back. "...Thanks."
"Hn. I couldn't just leave you here, could I?" Shunsui replied. They began walking again, Rukia leading the way.
"Mind me asking what happened?" He asked.
"Ichigo?" Rukia prompted.
"I don't know." He admitted. "I've been having sharp pains in my head, but that last one knocked the wind out of me."
"We should take you to the Fourth then." Rukia stated.
"No, that won't do anything." Ichigo paused to yawn, then pushed on. "I need Shiro. Just find Shiro for me…"
"Ichigo?" Rukia asked. The only reply she got was a muffled 'Hm?'
"Let him rest, Kuchiki." Shunsui advised. "I'll take him to the Thirteenth, you go ahead and let Jushiro know we're coming."
"Of course!" Rukia hurried off to find Shiro and her Captain, leaving Shunsui with Ichigo.
"You poor child. You always manage to find yourself in the middle of our problems." He sighed. "We knew it was only a matter of time before he tried something, yet we didn't do anything to avoid it. And now you've paid for our mistake."
Shunsui mulled over his thoughts as he walked, and soon found himself at the Thirteenth's barracks. When he passed Jushiro's office on his way to Ichigo's room, his friend called out to him.
"Is that you, Shunsui?" Jushiro asked. Shunsui paused, backtracking to respond.
"Just dropping off your honorary squad member." He replied lightly. Jushiro glanced at Ichigo sleeping on Shunsui's back, then to the child sleeping in his own lap.
"Let's take them to a spare room to rest." Jushiro stood, handing Shiro over to Rukia. He led the way out of his office, the rest following behind him. A short walk down the hall and they finally arrived at their destination. Ichigo was put to bed then Rukia placed Shiro on his chest, the same way she had seen them sleeping at the Fourth. Both of them seemed to relax, now resting quietly. Jushiro drew the blanket over them, then spoke quietly.
"I'm worried about him." He admitted. "Who knows what actually happened. All we have is the limited information Ichigo has been able to give us, but that's not enough to know how to fix this whole mess.
"This is our own fault, so it is now our responsibility to help him get through this."