Cera swims back to consciousness, her head feeling fuzzy and full of cloth - heavy cloth. She tries to sit up, and feels a pair of hands support her by the shoulders into a sitting position. She hears a quiet "Come on, Cera. Open your eyes…" from beside her, and slowly cracks them open.
At first, everything's too bright and it hurts her head like a stiletto to her forehead to look at anything. After a minute, she tries again and is relieved to find it hurts less this time - and then feels whoever is next to her relax slightly, and the same voice as before say "Almost there, Cera. Come back to me, please." That'd be Aloth's voice, she'd recognize it no matter what. She lets herself lean into his chest, tucking her head under his chin.
How long was I out, Aloth?
She lets herself get swamped by his relief, practically throwing herself into the emotion. "Not long, about an hour. You kept mumbling though, talking about a 'Vara' while you were out though. Does that mean anything to you?"
Cera only wishes it doesn't - the vision she had, Thaos asked her to trick a woman named Iovara Ix Ensios away from her refuge of Creitum and to a city known as Ossionus. Iovara…her sister.
The very thought sends guilt, regret, and shame welling up inside her until she feels like she could throw up from it all - if only it were that easy, if only she could rid herself of these feelings so easily. And the memories connected to them. "Did I dream the Delemgan?"
"Two tree-women? No, you didn't."
"Teir Evron?"
"Again, no."
"Our Awakenings….they're…."
"Permanent. Yes, not at all the answer either of us had hoped for. Which means…."
"You'll be stuck with Iselmyr forever. Aloth, I'm…" Sorry. So incredibly sorry.
"I was going to say your only chance is for Thaos to cough up whatever answer it is you need. I wasn't thinking about Iselmyr at all. But, if you're asking, we came to an understanding. She's…quiet. We had a talk, after the Delemgan said there was no way back from an Awakening but a way forward. Ever since I was Awakened, I've spent my whole life hoping for someone else to undo it. My mother would bring home a miracle cure one day, or my father could send her away like he made her appear. Or someone in the Academy could cast a spell and she'd be gone - I'd even hoped that someone in the Leaden Key could make her disappear back to wherever it is she came from. And, well, I won't say I wasn't curious if a Watcher could maybe at least make her shut up. But…I've realized I have to solve my own problems. And, surprisingly enough, it wasn't nearly as hard as I thought it would be to finally assert myself. Perhaps she was trying to get me to do that, but I have to say her methods were a little off if she was."
Cera sputters out a laugh, grateful that Aloth can read her well enough to know when she needs a distraction from her own problems. She looks around, finally realizing they're in the shadow of a large tree and sitting among various flowers - Pilgrim's Crown and Admeth's Wyrt, mostly.
Aloth slips a flower from the Pilgrim's Crown behind one of her ears, then helps her to her feet carefully. "The others went to the marketplace we saw earlier, hoping there would be something there that could keep this from happening."
Cera cracks a grin, saying "There'd be something! Whoever invented a potion or enchantment that could keep an Awakened Watcher from getting visions of their past life would be the richest person in the world."
Aloth's look doesn't lose any of its seriousness, even as he steadies her to keep her from stumbling as she takes a step. "Cera, you're getting worse. Rapidly, now. You didn't pass out this much before Thaos…triggered whatever memory he did back in the Ducal Palace."
Cera shrugs uncomfortably, shifting her weight from foot to foot for a minute and looking at the grass behind him. "Yeah, well, it's not like focusing on that fact will make it any better. Aerea, she…Eder and the others are coming."
Aloth bites back a sigh, they seem to have the worst timing. Or the best, if they were looking to interrupt the two elves. He doesn't dare think about how he might've gotten Cera talking about the vision she was seeing - all throughout this whole adventure, she's been mostly tight-lipped about what her past life was like. The night after Defiance Bay was a rare exception, all the revelations must've been too much to keep secret. He gets the sneaking suspicion she doesn't want him to worry about her - it's not working, its doing the exact opposite and worrying him far more.
Sure enough, all the others round the corner maybe ten seconds later and Eder says "Hey, she's awake! Cera, you still with us?"
"Yeah. I'm good for now. C'mon, we've got some gods to talk to."
They're in Teir Evron, and Cera's just inserted the crystal piece into the central altar. The floor goes black as the night sky, then lights up with thousands of stars. They see many different symbols on the floor, and Cera looks at them all in wonder. "That's Galawain's symbol, along with Magran and Aybydon. There's Hylea's over there. And Berath's…what?"
Eder asks "How's a noble know all this stuff? I get the whole fancy education and all, but…"
Cera shrugs, saying "I spent a lot of time in the library. And seeing as my parents didn't think much at all about me reading fictional stories after I was about the human equivalent of six or so, well, I found other things to read. One of them happened to be a book about the gods."
They all look at the floor, and Pallegina asks "Which of these gods can we trust? If Thaos is working for Woedica…"
Cera bites her lip, and says "And which of them would be inclined to helping us stop him…not Skaen, the god of vengeance and uprisings…chances are he'd support Woedica's return to power. Well, we're hunting Thaos, right? Why not go to the god of the hunt?"
It makes as much sense as talking with the Gods themselves, so why not give it a try?
Aloth's looking around the inn in Twin Elms searching for Cera in the room - she's nowhere to be found. Eder, however, is sitting at the counter - as good a place to start searching for Cera as any. "You looking for Cera? I invited her over here for a drink or two, figured she could use anything to help with that haunted look on her face she's had ever since she had that last vision in front of the Delemgan. She ordered an Aedyran mead they serve, downed it fast, paid and left, and made her way through the crowd that way." Eder points straight to the crowd, but Aloth can make out the doorway just over the tops of their heads.
"Thanks, Eder. Wait, what made you think her drinking is a good idea? She's a Cipher, and a powerful one! That combined with her Awakened soul spells trouble if she gets drunk!"
"She only had the one. Some spiced honey wine or something. Said she tried it before leaving home and it wasn't that bad - and that it was the only alcoholic drink she'd actually drink, and only one at a time. She also told me something about not being able to drown herself out with everyone else, said it used to help with her thoughts. You making any sense of that?"
"Unfortunately, yes. She's a Cipher, Eder. Able to hear the thoughts of dozens of people at once, if she chooses or can't block them out. Bets are she was trying to hear so many thoughts from everyone else that she couldn't hear her own." He makes his way through the crowd, wishing he could navigate them like Cera can thanks to her Cipher abilities.
Sure enough, he finds her on the balcony - standing in the rain, looking like she's cold. He drapes his cloak around her shoulders from behind, which doesn't even get a twitch out of her. "What are you doing out here, Cera? We've got an animal standoff to break up tomorrow, remember? Sagani and Pallegina went to bed earlier, Kana is regaling people with songs from Rauatai, and Eder is still enjoying whatever it is he's ordering."
Cera's only response is a shrug, along with a sense of despair about her. He moves so he's right in front of her, gathering her into his arms. "Cera, what's wrong? You can tell me, you know that."
Cera shakes her head, whispering "You'll hate me…"
"No, never. Your literally the best thing that ever happened to me, Cera. I could never hate you."
He studies her face, noticing how pale she still is - when the Delemgan sisters mentioned the pit they'll have to jump into with divine assistance so they don't die at the bottom, she went as pale as a Cean Gwyla and looked like she could have thrown up. And then, she passed out almost directly after the conversation ended.
And even now, she looks more like a ghost than a living person.
Her quiet, exhausted voice cuts through his thoughts, saying "Go on inside, I'll stay out here for a while."
Aloth shakes his head, there's no way he's just going to leave her alone out here. Given the fact that they've been attacked by Leaden Key members more and more as they keep getting in the middle of their plans, the way she keeps having flashbacks of her past life, and a hundred other things that go through Aloth's head, there's no way he's going back inside unless Cera comes in with him.
Cera tenses up, her whole body twitching, and says "Aloth…"
Instead of saying anything, he kisses her. After they break, she presses her face into his armor while choking back a sob, saying "I don't deserve you…"
Aloth barely manages to bite back a protest, sure that Cera can hear it in his thoughts.
"I…I had a sister, way back when. Iovara. We…we joined the Missionary Order together. We got different assignments, promised we'd find each other after they were finished and trade stories of things the Gods' work accomplished. But…but I later heard she'd split from the order. Thaos…he asked me to find her, get her somewhere he could get to her. And I did, didn't I? I betrayed 'Vara, my only sister." She breaks down crying, mumbling lines in Engwithan incoherently.
Aloth runs his fingers through her hair, saying "Cera, listen to me. We'll figure this out. Whatever happened, I of all other people know how manipulative Thaos can be. He's got an entire organization running in near-absolute ignorance of what their true motives are. Whatever he made you do, it's not your fault. Not then, not now. Especially not now." He can feel the guilt she's feeling, guilt so strong she's practically made of it. "Cera, I'm not going to leave you alone tonight, alright? You need some rest, which you're not going to get out here."
"Maybe…maybe if you talk to me or something…"
Aloth gets an idea, and says "Well, I've got this spell in my Grimoire called 'Called to Slumber' - in battle, it puts them out for a few minutes. Of course, with you being so exhausted…it may put you out for a lot longer."
"You…you think that'll work?"
"It puts fully-rested, alert people trying rather hard to kill us out for a good five minutes during a fight, Cera. I'm certain it'll put one exhausted Watcher out for a while. Besides, if something happens I'll be right next to you. But nothing's going to happen other than you getting some much-needed rest."
Twenty minutes later, Cera's sitting apprehensively on the edge of the bed and nervously watching Aloth flip through the pages of his Grimoire - it's one thing to watch him cast spells on their enemies, it's another entirely to have him cast one on her. Aerea whispering that the last guy she trusted so completely was Thaos doesn't help matters - a little tidbit she's never sharing with anyone even if they're a Cipher digging through her mind.
"Alright, here it is. Ready?" He shows her the page, full of diagrams of a moon and things she can't make heads or tails of - she's never tried to cast a spell before! - and puts a hand on her shoulder to lay her down on the pillow. Upon realizing how nervous she is, Aloth kisses her and says "You'll just close your eyes, Cera. That's all, I promise."
Cera shakily nods, and lays her head on the pillow. And the last thing she remembers hearing as Aloth's voice saying some incantation from his book.
AN: Hey, everybody! Next chapter is up! Hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas! I'll be posting more chapters soon - wrapping things up, stopping Thaos, all of it! To answer any questions about Aerea - Cera's past life - such as why she can speak Aedyran and all that...she and Cera are sharing not only a body but also Cera's Cipher powers. So, that in combination with Cera's own knowledge of the language means she picked it up fairly quickly for learning a language that didn't exist way back when she was alive. And, incidentally, she wants to stop Thaos just as much as everyone else. in the end of the game - spoiler, if you haven't finished yet stop reading here! - a vision shows that the character's past life started doubting everything - Thaos' teachings, what Iovara had said, all of it - and they went to question Thaos in Sun in Shadow. Well, Aerea remembers all that, and knowing what they all know now she's feeling pretty guilty. Enjoy!