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[Author's Notes: I couldn't do it. I couldn't let this story end with everyone dead and decapitated. Also, it felt great to add some supernatural elements again. I hope you all like this enhanced ending better.]

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Chapter Thirteen - The Beginning

The breeze created by Momma bear's approaching paw tickled my cheek. I ducked an instant before its impact would have torn my head off. Momma bear growled after missing her mark and brought her arm back for another swing. I dropped to the ground, my hands and knees splashing in the pool of Yuki's blood, and crawled through the animal's legs. She spun around to chase me.

I sprinted to the tent, dove inside, and grabbed the can of bear spray Koizumi kept at the head of his sleeping bag. An instant later, a bear paw ripped away the tent's nylon fabric, bathing me in daylight. I rolled onto my back, aimed the nozzle at Momma bear's face, and pulled the trigger. The spray nailed her nose dead center, blinding her. Noxious chemicals filled her lungs.

She rose and shrieked. Her paws struggled to wipe the chemicals off of her face but proved ineffective. Her three sons looked at their mother with confused expressions, temporarily forgetting about me. I sat up and took careful aim. One by one, I shot a healthy dose of spray into their faces, and one by one, they raised their paws and shrieked.

I bolted from the campsite and found the trail. For the next few hours, I ran as fast as I could, stopping only now and then at streams to get a drink of water. I didn't stop till I stumbled into town where I collapsed on a bench inside the ranger station. With so much of Nagato's blood on me, they drew their guns. I raised my hands and told them what happened.

###

Within an hour, a heavily-armed crew ferried in by helicopter descended on the campsite. They found the headless bodies of three naked girls and one man. (I failed to mention the clothes-free nature of our outing.) The four bears hadn't gotten far. The rangers followed their tracks, hunted them down, and killed them. Once a bear gets a taste of human blood, they'll never settle for less.

Paramedics drove me to the hospital in a nearby town. They said it was standard procedure to make sure I hadn't suffered any internal injuries or other damage. They released me into the care of my mother the next day.

All of North High attended the funeral. School administration canceled school so everyone could come out to mourn. I sat up front amid four coffins and a sea of shocked faces dripping with tears. Admin gave me a month off (most of which I spent sitting in front of my television watching anime).

The carnage made national news. Thankfully, they didn't show images of the headless bodies and didn't mention the victim's unclothed state. All of Lake Tapena's camping got shut down pending a full investigation. Eventually, they opened the south campsites, but the north campsites near the caves remained off limits.

###

On my first day back at school, lots of people offered condolences and hugged me. Most didn't know what to say. Even Taniguchi and Kunikida were apologetic. I tried my best to concentrate on the lessons but didn't do too well.

After classes, I walked to the SOS Brigade club room. To my surprise, nothing in the room had changed. I sat at my seat at the table and looked around. The place felt so empty. I was about to break down and cry, but a knock on the door stopped me.

"Come in," I shouted.

Miss Tsuruya stepped inside. "I'm so sorry for what happened." Her eyes were red from crying.

I rose and took her into my arms. "You lost your best friend too," I said. "And your test-taking partner."

"You know about that, huh?"

"Yeah, Koizumi told me you get uncontrollably nervous before a test and the only way you can relax is by having sex right before class."

"It wasn't just tests. He helped me when I thought a teacher might drop a pop quiz on me, and when I thought I might be asked to get up and speak. I didn't take any chances."

I chuckled. "He told me you two were logging some impressive numbers."

"The jerk." She giggled through tears. "I told him not to tell anyone."

"The ENOZ girls found you out. Then I pulled the details out of him. He was getting burnt-out from all the incredible sex and asked me if I'd be willing to share the load."

Tsuruya frowned. "I've been failing all my tests lately and I haven't been able to speak, but the teachers have been giving me a pass because I lost Mikuru. And Koizumi. But nobody knew about him." She shot me an irritated glance. "Except everybody."

I took her hand. "I'd be glad to help out if you want me to."

She searched my eyes. Then she walked to the door, locked it, and returned. "You'll have to audition first." She unbuttoned her blouse. A moment later Miss Tsuruya stood naked before me.

This really cheered me up. There was something special about have a gorgeous nude girl in the SOS Brigade club room again.

She rested her hands on her hips. "How would you like to do me?"

I bent her over the table and dropped my pants.

###

Tsuruya and I fucked like bunnies, many times per day. We found it to be very therapeutic in helping dull the pain. Our sexual escapades kept the endorphins flowing, but when they wore off the empty pit in my gut returned. I had lost my SOS Brigade family and it hurt like hell.

Another group took over the SOS Brigade club room. I didn't want it anymore.

Eventually, Tsuruya's sexual needs overwhelmed me and I had to turn her down a couple times. Desperate, she turned to Xanax and found the anti-anxiety drug was as effective as sex when it came to calming her nerves, though not nearly as fun. A half-and-half solution proved impossible. The drugs killed her drive.

We remained the best of friends and sneaked away to a love hotel on the odd weekend to make up for lost time, but instead of lifting my spirits, the intermittent sex enlarged the size of my void.

###

One morning, when I felt the lowest I could imagine, I found a note in my shoe locker. It read, "After school, come by classroom 5." I recognized the handwriting but couldn't believe my eyes. It had to be a forgery. Still, there was no way I was going to miss that meeting.

When I stepped into Room 5 after classes, there was no one inside. The blinds were drawn and it was dark. Suddenly, the room spun full circle. Somehow my shoes remained glued to the ground. When the room finally settled, everything had changed. I stood in the midst of a war zone, one encapsulated inside some sort of a cube-shaped forcefield. The walls glowed and shimmered. Books, desks, and chairs had been strewn around, most of the items destroyed. I recognized it as Room 5 from the few pieces of furniture that remained intact.

"Hello, Kyon."

I whipped my head around. Yuki Nagato stood before me but not in a way I'd ever seen her before. Her school uniform was drenched in blood. A patchwork of gaping wounds riddled her core. Blood-coated steel shafts littered the ground around her.

At her feet lay a body with a hunting knife lodged in its chest. I looked closer. What the fuck? That body was me!

"What the hell is going on?"

Yuki lifted her gaze and met my eyes. "Ryoko Asakura has just killed the copy of you unique to this universe. Although I was able to delete her program, by the time I arrived the damage had been done."

"In this universe? What's going on? What am I doing here? Why am I… dead?"

"You are not dead. The life of the copy of you that resides in this iteration of Miss Suzumiya's universe has been terminated."

"Haruhi Suzumiya? She's alive here too?"

"Very much so. However, when she learns of your demise, she will likely destroy this universe and create another one. Since all of her sub-universes are branches of this one, this action will cascade."

"What does that mean?"

"All her other universes will be destroyed as well."

"No shit. She can do that? How powerful is this girl?"

"The Haruhi Suzumiya in this root universe has unfettered control over its data flow."

I shook my head clear and tried to concentrate. "I still don't understand why I'm here."

"You are our backup plan."

My senses were swimming. "I'm your what?"

"We relocated you from your universe to this one through a common dimensional portal at the time the Data Integration Thought Entity calculated to be optimal. Sixty-seven days after the demise of my copy as well as the copies of Haruhi Suzumiya, Mikuru Asahina, and Itsuki Koizumi, you considered suicide." She paused to let the truth sink in. "You are a man in need of an SOS Brigade. We have an SOS Brigade that needs you."

"But what about all the people in my universe? My sister, my mother, Miss Tsuruya?"

"You have disappeared from that world. In time, they will assume you took your own life and they will move on with theirs."

"But there are people back there that need me."

"It is out of my hands. The Data Integration Thought Entity made this decision in order to prolong its existence. Keep in mind, by remaining here and replacing your copy you'll ensure the continued existence of this universe as well as that of your home universe... and those you love."

"So I really have no choice."

"No."

I expelled a deep sigh. "Well, that sucks."

Yuki replied, "So do I."

I scanned her blood-drenched perforated body and frowned. A shimmering plasma field encased her form. For a second, I couldn't see her. Once the barrier dissipated, Yuki Nagato stood before me, a mirror copy of the girl whose breasts I'd fondled as she sat reading on a stump — smiling, beautiful, butt-naked. I took the girl in my arms. "Is this really you?"

Yuki pulled me close and kissed me.

I brushed back a few strands of her hair. "I guess I could get used to this."

"Excuse me. I must reconstitute this data space first." She took a step back and spoke some programming. Stuff swirled around us like dust in a tornado before solidifying into familiar shapes. A moment later, Room 5 looked pristine. Yuki Nagato stepped forward and took my hands. "We may proceed."

I scanned Room 5. "You're not an exact copy of my Yuki, are you?"

A set of kneepads materialized around the nude girl's knees and she dropped down before me. She lowered my zipper and took me into her mouth.

I intertwined my fingers behind my neck and closed my eyes. "Close enough."

###

After sucking me off, Yuki got to her feet. Her kneepads faded and a school uniform materialized over her body.

"Holy shit. What kind of Yuki are you?"

"I am an alien. Furthermore, Mikuru Asahina is a time traveler and Itsuki Koizumi is an esper."

"And Haruhi Suzumiya rules the world."

"She controls this universe."

I shook my head. "I'm not surprised. So what am I?"

"You are a normal human being." She paused. "Who has suddenly aged a year."

"What year is this?" I asked.

"Miss Suzumiya created the SOS Brigade four days ago."

"No shit? Well, I still am who I am. I'm sure they'll all get used to me."

"I believe they will."

We walked to the SOS Brigade club room.

"Are you dating Koji in this universe?"

Yuki shook her head. "Not yet." She looked up at me. "I have far less experience than my counterpart."

"A lacking I'll be more than happy to fix," I replied.

"I have been instructed to aid you in your transition in any way I can."

I glanced at the shapely legs rising up to meet Yuki's cute little bottom and smiled.

We stepped into the club room.

"Mikuru!" A bright smile lit up my face. It was so cool to see her alive again. "You're wearing clothes!"

The bashful maid pulled her arms into her body and her face turned beet red.

"You wanted to walk in on her changing into her maid outfit like you did yesterday, didn't you? You pervert. No dice this time, Romeo. That's what you get for being late."

My mouth dropped open when I beheld Haruhi Suzumiya at her commander's desk. "Damn, it's good to see you."

Haruhi furrowed her brow and looked at Yuki. "What's gotten into him?"

Koizumi assessed me with curious eyes. He could tell right off I'd changed. "Kyon seems fine to me." He waved for me to sit down and play a game of chess.

###

It took me a while to find my bearings in this strange new world. My fellow Brigade members were very helpful — especially Yuki, who made herself available 24/7 for whatever I wanted. If the club's supreme leader noticed any differences in me, she kept it to herself.

I often thought about the universe I once called home. Aside from the ridiculous amounts of sex I'd been getting, that place seemed rather tame compared to this one. In here I had daily brushes with the supernatural and I learned to appreciate what Haruhi Suzumiya was capable of — both consciously and subconsciously.

I had a good life, and everyone back home continued to live. All in all, that wasn't a bad trade-off, was it?

THE BEGINNING