TwoBit was walking into his kitchen to grab a cookie from the fresh batch his mom had just baked when the door was flung open. He suddenly felt a body slam into him and a pair of arms wrap tightly around his waist. TwoBit looked down to see what was the matter. "Pony? What's going on, kid?" he asked, gently pushing him away to look at his face.

"It's Soda. I didn't know. Did you know?" Pony said, tears streaking down his cheeks.

"Know what?" TwoBit prodded.

"That he's been hurting himself! I heard him say something about it to Darry. I didn't know. Why didn't I know?" Pony sobbed, and TwoBit folded him into his arms.

"Shh. It's okay, kiddo," TwoBit soothed, stroking Pony's hair.

"I don't believe it, TwoBit. Why didn't he just talk to me?"

"I don't think it's that easy, Pone. I know you've been through a lot. Soda has too though, and I think there's more to it than we know."

"But he's Soda. He has to be okay. I need him." Pony pulled away and looked at his friend.

"I know, kiddo, and he loves you a lot." TwoBit slung one arm over Pony's shoulders and led him to the living room.

"But why? Why would he do that?"

"I don't know, Pony. You'll have to ask Soda that question."

"Can I stay here a while, TwoBit?" Pony wiped his eyes and sniffled.

"Of course you can. I bum around your place enough, don't I?" TwoBit grinned at Pony and was relieved to see a small smile in return.

The two friends sat silently for a few moments, and then the phone rang.

TwoBit picked it up. "Hello? Yeah, he's here, Darry," he said, handing the phone to Pony.

"Hey, Darry. Yeah, I'm okay. I'm upset, but I'm okay." Pony listened for a moment. "Yeah, just talking to TwoBit. Sorry I ran. Please tell Soda it's okay, and I'm not mad at him. I'll talk to him later," he told Darry before hanging up.

"You really okay, kid?" TwoBit asked.

"I'm getting there. Just shocked, I guess. And I knew Soda had something going on with him. But he wouldn't say much to me about it.

"He's your big brother, Pony. He wants to protect you. We may all forget it sometimes, but you're still only fourteen. Soda and Darry don't want you trying to handle everything. Man, I don't either."

"Thanks, TwoBit. I'm glad you were home. I don't know who else I could've gone to since Johnny..."

"I know, kid. Hey, there's still Steve," TwoBit joked.

"Somehow, I don't think Steve would've appreciated a kid barging into his kitchen and crying all over him." Pony laughed.

"Hey, you never know!" TwoBit said, as he turned on the television.

Pony knew he'd have to talk to Soda later, but for now, he could joke around with TwoBit and forget the rest of the world existed. He could just be a fourteen year old kid.

"Sodapop?" Pony's voice called quietly.

Soda turned around and grinned at Pony. "Hey, Pone. You all right?" he asked, as he hugged his little brother tightly.

"I should be asking you that." Pony hugged him back, not wanting to ever let go.

"I'm sorry. I couldn't tell you." Soda hoped Pony would understand what he meant.

"It's okay. I mean, I don't really know, but it sounds hard." Pony closed his eyes and listened to Soda's heart beat.

"It is. I'm pretty messed up, Pony." Soda rested his chin on top of Pony's head.

"Aw, you're not messed up. Don't say that. Don't talk that way about my big brother." Pony finally let go of Soda.

"I've been hurting real bad, and I keep trying to fix it and making things worse."

"I have something for you," Pony said, as he opened a drawer and pulled out the pocket watch and photo he'd found. "I found this picture of you and mom. I remember taking it. And this, well, it was dad's, and I thought you should hold onto it."

Soda sighed, as he took both items from Pony. He stared at the picture, looking into his mom's eyes. He listened to the watch ticking and placed it in his shirt pocket for safe keeping, right next to his heart.

"Hey, Pony, you going to be okay with us away? It's only a day and one night. But I just want to make sure," Darry asked, as he folded his clothes to put in a duffel bag.

"I'll be fine, Darry. TwoBit will be around, and I have history project to do. I'll be over at my partner's house working on it most of tomorrow anyway," Pony answered.

"All right. If you need anything, tell Mrs. Mathews."

"I will. You just take care of Sodapop."

"I'll do my best. Don't worry, Pone. When things start to get better, we'll all go to Lake Spavinaw again together, okay?"

Darry kept running the events of the past year through his mind, and the pieces didn't seem to fit together. It wasn't that he thought Soda couldn't be hurting this badly from grief and loss, but he did believe there had to be something he was missing. Soda had to be hiding the rest of the puzzle, and Darry intended to get his brother to tell him everything. He couldn't let Soda continue on this path of self destruction. Right now, the emotional turmoil he was experiencing had him at the crossroads of perpetual despair and gradual inner peace. Darry prayed he could help Soda choose the right direction.

Soda tossed an extra pair of socks into his duffel bag before zipping it up.

"I hope this helps you, Sodapop," Steve said.

"I think it will. There's a reason I promised Darry I'd talk. I think I can out there at that lake." Soda thought for a moment. "There are some things Darry should know, especially now. I was trying to forget them myself, and I can't."

"Do whatever you need to do, man."

"Honestly, Steve, you should know too. You deserve to know after...well, after what you saw." Soda found himself unable to say it, but he knew Steve would understand.

"Buddy, I'm not glad you were cutting, but I am glad I caught you. It scared me, but the thought that it could've gone on longer without anyone knowing?" Steve met Soda's eyes. "Nothing has ever scared me more than that."

"Thanks for still sticking with me after all this, Steve. And we'll talk in a couple of days. I owe you that."

"You don't owe me a thing, but like I said, do whatever you need to do. I'll be here to listen," Steve said, squeezing Soda's shoulder.

"Hey, Soda, let's go!" Darry yelled from outside.

"I'm coming! Bye, Steve!" Soda waved, grabbing his bag and the cooler on the counter, as he ran to Darry's truck.

"Bye, Pony!" Soda hugged his brother, before he tossed the bag and the cooler into the backseat and hopped into the passenger seat.

"Ready, little buddy?" Darry asked, as he started the truck and pulled away from the house.

"As ready as I'm going to get," Soda replied.

"It's a little over an hour drive, so not long til we get there."

"That drive always felt longer," Soda remembered.

"I think trips seem longer when you're a kid."

"Hey, did you bring the fishing poles?"

"I did. They're in the back. We can't very well go to a lake and not fish, can we?" Darry grinned.

"How about the tent?"

"Of course, Soda! I got it. We're good. The only thing you need to worry about is you, little buddy."

"Yeah, I know. But I did grab the cooler you forgot!" Soda pointed out.

"All right. You did." Darry laughed. "So worry about you and our drinks and sandwiches. I got the rest."

"Thanks, Dar. Cause I know you've got me too," Soda said, as he rolled down the window and let the wind blow in his face.

"Yep. I sure do. I always will. You really don't have to worry at all, do you?" Darry smiled at his brother, as their city road faded into highway.