Welcome to the first flashback chapter! These are going to be interspersed with regular chapters but clearly marked as flashbacks, so you'll know which ones are which.

Chapter Five.

"Flashback #1: Second chances."

ooo

GLaDOS was very good at ignoring her emotions.

Unlike a human, who just sort of had to deal with how they felt, GLaDOS had both the ability and the habit of shutting them down if she didn't feel like listening to them, which was most of the time. Human emotions were hard to predict, hard to control, hard to understand... And they could easily get in the way of one's work. Especially this kind of work. GLaDOS prided herself in doing her work efficiently, and if she listened to her feelings and morals every time they began to speak, she wouldn't be able to get anything done. Besides, she wasn't human. Not completely. She was humanoid at best, but really, she was an AI. She didn't want or need to listen to emotions. So she didn't listen to them.

Most of the time.

Yes, most of the time GLaDOS was happy to silence her conscience and distance herself from her humanity for the sake of her science, however ethically questionable it may be. But this time... she was having a hard time letting herself fall back on the easiest solution.

You see, the test subject GLaDOS was currently guiding through the chambers was a mysterious, silent, determined woman named Chell. Chell was an incredible test subject, far better than any other on record. You could see it in those silvery-blue eyes - she wasn't going to let anything in those chambers get in her way. Her outstanding performance and her tenacity had snatched GLaDOS's attention and weren't letting go.

But it wasn't just that. It wasn't just Chell's knack for solving tests. There was something else about Chell that set her apart in GLaDOS's eyes - and yet GLaDOS couldn't quite put her finger on what. But it resulted in a stubborn voice in the back of her mind that refused to let her ignore it the way she had every time before. A voice that called her to consider how Chell perceived everything around her. A voice that, upon watching the human woman hide in a corner in fear when she couldn't keep up with the test, called upon GLaDOS's deeply-buried, firmly-silenced empathy. And for whatever godforsaken reason, GLaDOS couldn't force that empathy back down.

She stared at the screen before her. In a corner of Test Chamber 12, an exhausted Chell lay sleeping with her head resting on her arms, and her portal gun always close by. Through the surveillance cameras littered throughout the chambers, GLaDOS watched over the resting woman, ensuring she could see her chest rise and fall with her breathing. Poor girl, GLaDOS caught herself thinking. I've tested her to exhaustion. Why are there no beds in there...?

Any other time, if a thought like that entered her mind she'd follow it up with, Who cares if there's beds? They're here to test. But this time she thought no such thing.

A few days passed in this manner, during which GLaDOS spent most of her time watching Chell test, and the rest of her time pacing across her chamber trying to understand why she cared so much about Chell. It was almost funny, she thought. With the way she was constantly thinking about Chell, staring at Chell, hoping Chell was okay, wanting the best for Chell... it was almost as if she...

The thought that followed, stopped GLaDOS in her metaphorical tracks.

Am I in love with her?!

What an utterly human mistake to make. Falling in love. Come on, GLaDOS, she reprimanded herself, you're better than this. You know better than to let emotions cloud your judgment. Yanking her hair back with one hand and facepalming with the other, she sat in the middle of the room and tried to shut out her feelings once more, tried to convince herself that she was not in love with Chell, she couldn't be, she shouldn't be, she won't be, she was above letting human emotions control her. But then she stole another glance at the camera feed in Chamber 16 and thought, Am I really, though?

She watched Chell guard herself from turrets as she made her way through the chamber. Though fear was certainly visible on her face, she didn't let herself freeze up in panic. Dropping cubes onto the turrets from a portal, she cleared the path for herself more easily than any other test subject, and came out the other side in one piece. GLaDOS couldn't help but admire Chell's quick, resourceful thinking. How did she do it?

She had to wonder where it came from, because she barely knew anything about Chell's background. No one at Aperture did. Even if she were to look at her file, there was barely any information available. They had her first name and her age and when she showed up in Aperture and that was about it. Nothing about where she was from or what she did before she started the testing... nothing.

This poor girl, GLaDOS thought. Barely anything left of her past, that we know of at least, fearful and exhausted in the present, and I of all people am in charge of her future... surely the least I could do is make her future a good one, right?

GLaDOS could barely recognize her own thoughts. Her instinct would have been to reject them, but it seemed some entirely different instinct was telling her to let herself feel this way. She didn't know what to make of it. Her only course of action up to this point had been to ignore everything she felt, but that wasn't an option anymore. These feelings were too strong. They refused to be silenced.

She glanced back at the screen. Oh God. Chell had made it to Chamber 17. GLaDOS had to explain the test. She scrambled for her microphone, slamming the button down and doing her best not to let any trace of panic or embarrassment into her voice. "The Vital Apparatus Vent will deliver a Weighted Companion Cube in 3. 2. 1." On 1, she pressed a button on a panel labeled 17, which caused the cube to be released into the Chamber for Chell to grab. "The Weighted Companion Cube will accompany you through the test chamber," GLaDOS continued. "Please take care of it."

GLaDOS smiled at her screen. This was the only circumstance she was allowed to speak to Chell while the latter was in the test chambers. She watched Chell pick up the companion cube and use it to reach the higher platforms. And - oh my god she patted it and gave it a kiss. That's too adorable. GLaDOS couldn't help it - she giggled a little. Wait. Oh no, was she really still holding down the microphone button?!

God. This was why she didn't like letting herself care about other people. She'd get distracted and embarrass herself or mess up the tests, or worse. She'd have to keep this under control somehow.

ooo

A couple more days passed. Fortunately GLaDOS had succeeded in not letting her feelings cause her to make mistakes again. She still couldn't silence them, though. She'd wondered if maybe the emotion-silencing action was malfunctioning, but she could still silence other feelings like sadness and irritation, so it couldn't be an error there.

It seemed like the worst had become reality - being forced to face the human part of herself without a way of escaping it. The error wasn't within GLaDOS's programming. Her human basis, her conscience was done being repressed. Humans were stubborn, weren't they? The one GLaDOS was based on was proving herself especially so, even in death, even when forced into an AI that wanted nothing to do with her. It was GLaDOS's nature to reject her human instincts, to insist that she wasn't human, not at all. She had a job to do, and she was going to do it. That was what she was for.

But the humanity inside of her was having none of that.

GLaDOS sighed. While pondering this, she had spent quite awhile now lying on the floor in the middle of the room, thinking so hard she was using more power than she was receiving. She'd been keeping an eye on the surveillance feed, but now she had to pull herself to her feet and reach for the microphone. Chell had made it to Chamber 19.

"Welcome to the final test," she announced. "When you are done, you will drop the device in the equipment recovery annex."

That would be it. Chell would finish the test, drop off her portal device, and then... leave, most likely. A sudden, unidentifiable, almost painful sensation filled GLaDOS's chest. No, that couldn't be all there was to it!

Well, technically it could. Maybe it would be easier to let her go and forget any of this ever happened. Of course that would be easier. She would never even have to deal with it. And after all, the best solution to a problem was usually the easiest one.

Usually.

No. Not this time. This was the exception. The easiest route wasn't better this time. Or - or maybe it was, but... she'd be happier, at least, if she could talk to Chell genuinely at least once. She held the microphone button down again. "After you have deposited your portal device, an elevator will transport you to the central chamber." There, she thought. I can meet her outside my chamber, and we can talk.

... What will I say?

ooo

Chell stood silently in the elevator as it ascended, taking a moment to let her mind catch up with the fact that testing was over. No more living in fear. No more sleeping on the floor because there was nowhere to rest. No more running from cleverly hidden turrets or narrowly avoiding falling in acid. It was over now. She could relax now. She could get out of this facility and go back to the regular world.

No. Not yet. That voice, the computerized voice that had led her through the tests, told her she was headed for the 'central chamber', wherever that was. Someone probably needed something with her. Maybe to tell her something. Maybe to get something more out of her. She didn't know.

The elevator came to a gradual stop and the door opened to reveal a long, empty, white hallway that ended at a spacious, dimly-lit room decorated only with a couple of platforms and several computer monitors giving off a bluish-white glow. It seemed empty. A heavy, eerie silence flooded the hallway. If it weren't for the evidently recent activity of these computers, Chell might have thought this entire area had been abandoned.

She looked around at some of the monitors, though none of them struck her as potentially helpful. She glanced back at the elevator door. Was she really in the right place? Was she supposed to be here? Should she go back?

"Wait!" A slightly panicked but otherwise familiar voice finally broke the haunting silence. "Don't go. I wanted to talk to you." Chell turned, and the face that gazed back at her was... not entirely human. This... woman? was small and slender, dressed in a black and white Aperture uniform. Her golden-hued optics held contact with Chell's own silvery blue eyes. She had short, asymmetrically-styled hair that was just as clean and snowy-white as everything in the facility. She reached a human-like but metallic-tinted hand towards Chell's shoulder, wanting to physically stop her from trying to leave, but paused when she realized she had Chell's attention. "My name is GLaDOS. I'm the one who's been overseeing your tests."

So she was the one who'd been doing this to her. Putting her in danger, watching her. Guiding her from time to time, yes, but also heckling her every now and then, as if it weren't bad enough that she was—willingly, it seemed—making it very clear how unsafe and unethical Aperture was. Chell instinctively raised her arms in self defense.

"I'm not going to hurt you," GLaDOS said. "I know you have every reason not to believe me, but I just want to talk to you. I want to get to know you. I know there's more to you than just how good you are at testing. I want to get to know you as a person."

She wants to be friends? After all this testing crap? Am I really supposed to trust that?

Chell shook her head. You hurt me, she signed, not knowing or caring if GLaDOS could even understand her. But fortunately, GLaDOS was a supercomputer with the greatest collection of knowledge seen by mankind. She knew every language the Internet could teach, without the months and years of studying. Including ASL.

"Yes. I did. I tested you, I taunted you, I endangered you, all for the sake of science, without any regard for your well-being. And I'm sorry for doing that to you." GLaDOS stared at the floor as the words pushed their way out. Chell got the impression she wasn't the type to apologize. She didn't know if that was improving her perception of this situation at all. Neither of them said anything for a moment.

"I'm being serious. I... really like you." It looked like she blushed, energy visibly rushing to her face. "I'm just terrible at dealing with it," she mumbled.

Chell didn't want to trust GLaDOS, but the way she had said "I really like you" had felt so different from everything she had ever said before. It felt more genuine. More honest. More... human.

"Will you give me a second chance?"

Chell didn't respond immediately. There was a lot to consider. Was she just supposed to pretend the testing hadn't happened, much less genuinely terrified her? Was she supposed to pretend everything was okay and be friends? Somehow, Chell knew GLaDOS didn't expect that much at all. Indeed, GLaDOS knew the whole testing situation had ruined her chances at a good first impression. She was hoping that she could prove herself despite it. And she didn't even really expect that. Uncharacteristically nervous, she looked down at the floor, then back up at Chell, watching the woman's expression for any suggestion of either malice or forgiveness.

Chell still felt that trusting GLaDOS, in most (if not all) situations, would quickly prove to be a mistake. But for whatever reason, she had a feeling that maybe that didn't apply this time. Chell knew she wasn't the most forgiving, but she was pretty sure she wasn't the least forgiving either. She wouldn't put her guard down just yet, but if GLaDOS really meant what she said, maybe it would be worth a shot.

Chell bit her lip. Anything she had to say now was not only sure to be heard, but was also being anticipated. She couldn't say nothing.

"Okay. But don't make me regret it."

ooo

Apologies for the wait this chapter. I don't really have an excuse. I don't know that I'd call myself busy as of late. I've been doing things, but they're mostly "sitting around the house playing video games" things.

I actually started working on this chapter and the next chapter around the same time, so ch6 is about half done I'd say (if my word count patterns are anything to go by). So hopefully it won't take a million years for that to go up.

Thanks for reading, constructive feedback is always appreciated, be nice to each other and stay hydrated, goodnight

~melancholy starlight