18 November 1989

The blond sat on the toilet seat, shivering. He looked at the bathtub and watched as it filled up with hot water. Soon, steam rose and filled part of the bathroom, but Cloud wasn't getting any warmer. The blond waited for the tub to fill up a little more before he took his clothes off. Automatically, he looked down at his naked body.

It wasn't standing up, which he was glad for. Cloud pushed the thought out of his mind as he tested the water, but he couldn't stop himself from thinking about it again.

It had been happening a lot since that first day. Cloud still didn't understand what it meant, other than those dreams and daydreams about Sephiroth had something to do with it. It was obvious why his body acted so strangely after his little...fantasies; what he didn't know was why those thoughts haunted him in the first place, especially so often.

The blond idly scratched himself, though he wasn't itchy. He pulled his hand away when he began to feel that familiar stirring. Quickly, Cloud turned the water off and carefully stepped inside the tub before sitting down. The blond shuddered at the sudden warmth and laid back, relaxing. He put a plastic cup into the water, filled it up, and used the cup to rinse himself, putting the cup aside once he was completely wet. The blond then sat up and poured some shampoo into his hand before washing his hair.

He lathered his hair and let his mind wander. It wasn't very long before his thoughts veered into dangerous territory and It happened again.

Cloud looked away from...It and finished working on his hair before rinsing it. He contemplated leaving the bath afterwards, but ultimately decided to wash his body as well, feeling he was too dirty to go without the extra wash. He started scrubbing his stomach, moving upwards and cleaning his chest, arms, and shoulders. The blond looked down again and tentatively washed his legs, avoiding his crotch area before he reluctantly washed himself there. He did a quick job, and he knew he wasn't being thorough enough, but he didn't care. He rinsed all of the soap off and drained the tub before standing up and grabbing a towel. He quickly dried himself off before putting on some sleep clothes and getting into bed.

The feelings refused to leave him. He rolled over onto his stomach to see if that would help, but it did nothing. If anything, the pressure was worse now.

Giving up, Cloud rolled onto his back and slipped his hand down his pants.

The blond's heart nearly stopped when he heard the door creak open. Freezing, with a hand still down his pants, he looked with wide eyes over at the door.

Yazoo gave him a deadpan look and shut the door. Cloud felt himself heat up. He quickly pulled his pants up before sitting up and facing the wall. He covered his face.

The blond silently cursed himself for not being more careful. He was on fire with embarrassment and was terrified. Now that Yazoo had found out, what would he do? Would he tell the others? If Kadaj were to know, he'd surely hold it over Cloud's head for the rest of his life. He had no idea what Loz and Jenova would do, but if word spread to his mother...

His mother. Cloud was absolutely terrified at the idea of her knowing even a hint of what he'd been doing.

Cloud grabbed onto his hair tightly, having something akin to a panic attack as worries continued to plague his mind. He jolted violently when something hit the back of his head.

The blond didn't turn but instead felt for the object, pulling it onto his lap.

It was a magazine. Cloud flipped it open, then dropped it again when he caught a glimpse of naked women in...certain positions. Doing...things. He pushed the magazine away and turned around.

Yazoo gave him a long look before he shut the door. Cloud's eyes nearly burned a hole in the wood before he finally looked down at his lap. He pulled the magazine towards him again and began to study it, feeling his body heat up again.

20 November 1989

He was back in town once again. This time, to take his mind off things, the blond went out after lunch. He pushed the other day's events out of his head and sat under the tower of the Nibelheim well, glancing at Tifa's house.

He had to make it up to her. Going back inside, Cloud grabbed a piece of paper and a pencil and scrawled a quick note before folding it up neatly and coming back out.

He looked at the note, then up at Tifa's house, then back to the note. Suddenly, he found himself at a loss for how he should deliver it.

Cloud sat back under the tower again for a moment and tried to think. He stood up and began to pace for a good few minutes.

The afternoon sun shone down on the town, though it was more chilly than warm, especially under the shade. It was a good day to be outside, Cloud figured as he got distracted from his current problem for a bit.

Much to his luck, Tifa came out of her house. She took a few steps, looking down with melancholy at the ground, before she noticed the blond. Immediately she appeared wary, and then surprised, as Cloud came forward quickly. Shyly, the blond stretched out his arm to hand her the note, and his heart beat quickly.

Tifa took the note. Cloud quickly shuffled away before anybody could catch the two of them together and go after him. He walked past the town's gates and stood there to somewhat hide by himself and think about his message. He angsted over it, wondering if it was good enough, or if he actually ended up doing something wrong and Tifa would somehow take offense. He then began to berate himself. He should have spent more time thinking and writing the note than finding out a way to deliver it.

But it didn't matter. He'd find out for sure whether his quick writing was sufficient tomorrow.

Notes:

Started: 2015年3月16日（月）

Finished: 2015年4月30日（木）

This version has been censored. To view the original version, go read this on AO3. Link is at the bottom of the bio (which really isn't a bio) on my profile page.

Yeah, you're going to hear that quite a bit in the later chapters unless you're already reading this on AO3. Sorry. But FFNet really isn't safe for me anymore. Now if only I didn't suck so much at censoring...

Ahaaa, such a long time to wait for a short chapter... A few weeks actually passed by where I couldn't even look at the document, though. So many things were going on and I had tons of stuff to catch up on and attend to. But the worst is over and I should have time for more writing. Whether it actually happens or not remains to be seen. :P Curse you, motivation! But it sure is great to be back. I miss updating. Your feedback and the growing amounts of views, follows, and faves even after so long with no updates always make my day. ;~;

Next chapter: If you've played the original game or at least know most of the story, you can probably already guess.