AN: Its finally here! Something we all wish would actually take place in the manga. Instead, you're reading my take on it XD I hope you enjoy it! Thank you for the kind reviews!

I can admit it when I'm in the wrong," Soujiro continued even though he kept a back against the three of him. He had an easier time admitting how weak the Juppongatana was when failing to overthrow the Oniwanban. He had admitted that and taken it much better than Sadojima Houji had. Though, at the time he had thought he was stronger than the rest of the Juppongatana combined.

Soujiro closed his eyes as he exhaled and slowly turned his head towards Kenshin but keeping his eyes on the ground. "I'm not blind to the fact how you have helped me and even risked your reputation for me...Everything just seems to be happening too fast."

Even worse, he had not grasped the depth of his situation until Megumi and the others explained why he needed to remain with them in hopes of overcoming the worst of his disease. It wasn't just his freedom he was losing, but he had lost his strength and it was strength he might not ever get back because of his disease. Even if he got over the worst of his illness, he might not ever recover the strength to perform the shukuchi again. It was a skill that had been a part of his identity and to lose that meant losing a part of him.

"I don't value the name that I have within the Meiji," Kenshin began. "Either way, it's worth risking if it meant you being able to stay." He then gave a kind smile towards Koharu. "I am coming to learn I would rather face the Meiji's wrath than that of your sister's." He said it in an effort to soften Soujiro's heart towards him.

Koharu was the only one that giggled. Kenshin was one of few who would openly acknowledge and accept Soujiro as her brother. "That's right. You would have had to face far worse if you let me down."

Soujiro raised his head towards Megumi when she approached him and got down by his beside. "This is why you shouldn't be alone," she said sternly. "You'll just drown yourself in your self pity."

"You don't understand.…" Soujiro's voice quivered. He could barely bring himself to meet either of their gazes. He only briefly looked up to meet Kenshin's gaze when he took a step forward towards him out of concern. Soujiro remembered he was the master of reading emotions and that he was already revealing too much to him.

Kenshin decided to hold back when he saw Soujiro's posture harden as he quickly turned his gaze away from him. It was a subtle action that already told Kenshin to back off. He decided to stay where he was.

Megumi clutched the blanket at Soujiro's feet and brought it over his knees that he rested his arms around. Soujiro was meant to take it as a hint to lay completely back down so she could cover him. She still worried about his temperature having dropped too quickly and not getting his needed warmth. Soujiro got the hint, but remained sitting up. She left the blanket draped over his legs and pulled away. "I want to know what happened to the person I first met." She recalled he had been smiling and teasing with Avaron that very day and wrestling playfully with Koharu just a little later. He had been smiling and laughing most of that day despite his circumstances.

"You mean before I had this disease and surrendered to the Meiji?"

"You arrived in Tokyo a day after you had been shot," she reminded him, "and fearing for the lives of the people close to you and facing a worse outcome than the one you actually got." Megumi then smiled as she spoke the following words. "Despite it all, you still found reason to smile and laugh through it all. Now? Your gunshot wound has mostly healed, you no longer have to fear for the lives of the people you care about and you're surrounded by people who only want to help you and protect you," she made a small gesture towards Kenshin. "You have more reasons to smile than when you first arrived in Tokyo, yet, you've been nothing but bitter. Care to argue that?"

"I…." Soujiro quickly tried to counter, but he couldn't form the words, especially when he felt Kenshin's gaze still studying him closely. Soujiro closed his mouth and kept silent. For a moment, no one said a word. After another moment, Koharu reached and risked pulling his hand into hers. He resisted at first for the mere reason he wasn't use to sharing in her affection openly. But all he had to think about was how he had nearly killed her after he had first ignored her. He ended up letting her coddle his hand against her. It was still frozen against her touch as she attempted to warm and comfort him. Not only did he end up allowing it, but it happened to be the hand she had put the beads on and ended up revealing to the others he was wearing it. While it may have been embarrassing more than anything, he quickly found how much of a comfort her affection was. Instead of risking his anger, she was taming it.

Megumi eventually let out a defeated sigh from his bitter silence. For the last time, she raised her back hand and touched it to his forehead. In this case, she hoped his fever would return soon. It would mean his body could still counter the deadly infection that could have spread more easily when he had allowed his body temperature to drop. She still felt little warmth coming through his skin.

Her lips started to curl when she sensed her words must be getting through to him. He wasn't openly rejecting her touch that time but had lowered his head in defeat to her as he pondered over her words. She lowered her hand and stood from him. "Come Koharu. Its best we let them sort this out alone."

Koharu nodded in agreement and looked back at Soujiro before letting go his hand. "Let Kenshin help you..." She then leaned towards him and whispered softly: "and be nice."

She was secretly delighted when he broke into a smile towards her. "Hai. I guess I don't have a choice….Thank you Koharu."

It was when Koharu had released his hand and turned her back to him that she wondered what exactly he had thanked her for. She still had little idea how much of a comfort she had been to him that night.

As they started to take their leave, Megumi let Koharu exit the room first and softly spoke to Kenshin. Soujiro knew it was regarding him when Kenshin momentarily glanced at him before nodding back to Megumi. He knew she must be telling Kenshin to make sure he remained calm no matter what might exchanged between the two the next few moments.

Soujiro was already regretting his actions that night. He didn't want everyone to be on edge because he might fly off the handle. He knew he had ended up counting on Koharu too much to keep him from lashing out towards Kenshin. Her trust and affection towards him had helped to ease a lot of peoples' apprehension towards him that night. It had also helped that he had already made a good first impression on Megumi. She was more relaxed and trusting of Soujiro than even Kenshin. She seemed braver to the others in how close she let herself be to him while she talked down at him.

Kenshin's nervousness was apparent when he kept his distance after Megumi left. It didn't help that Soujiro remained sitting upright on his side with his back to Kenshin. It's not that Kenshin didn't trust him, but he didn't know where to start without accidentally sparking the fire within Soujiro. For now, it was difficult to say where his health was headed and any added stress on his body could add dire consequences and that's what Kenshin was most afraid of.

It seemed like minutes went by before either of them attempt to speak.

I take it back. I'd rather be in Aoshi's presence.…He thought nervously. At least we have made peace.… Kenshin finally started to open his mouth thinking he had to be the one to speak first before he was surprisingly cut off by Soujiro.

"Kenshin," Soujiro uttered over his shoulder towards him.

Kenshin still ended up gulping before carefully responding. "Yes?"

"Do you really believe I'll recover my full strength? Or did you lie to Yamagata and currently still risking your so- call valueless reputation within the Meiji for my sake?" He then forced a laugh. "If so, you're more foolish than I originally believed."

"If it was Koharu, I'm sure you would take such a risk too." Kenshin smiled even though Soujiro's back was to him. "As far as recovering your strength, much of it may depend on you." Kenshin risked a few steps towards him. "Even if that happens Soujiro, it doesn't mean you're useless."

"Yamagata would say differently. I have to face justice one way or another. If I can't perform the duties he wants me to carry out he'll have me -"

"It won't happened."

"How can you be so sure?" Soujiro snapped as he glared towards Kenshin. He still had his back to him. " Even if my strength returns, I'm trapped. Look what they did to Shishio. When he was no longer of any use, they tried to dispose of him. He wasn't even a criminal at the time. How do you think they'll view me?" He looked away clutching the futon beneath him. "Without my strength, I truly will be at their mercy." He was already speaking more honestly to Kenshin than he had to Koharu.

Another moment of silence set in before Kenshin risked saying what had been obvious to him nearly that whole night. "…You're… terrified."

It had gone unnoticed by both Megumi and Sanosuke. Perhaps even Koharu. It had only been assumed Soujiro wasn't pleased with his outcome but it had been a facade to hide his growing fear. "You think you're going to suffer Shishio's fate." He started to approach Soujiro again untilI he saw Soujiro's posture tense up. He halted before him. "That's not going to happen to you. I'm not justifying the Meiji's actions for what they did to Shishio, but they didn't do away with him just because he knew too much. Even before that he showed signs of betraying their trust and was becoming ruthless."

Soujiro scoffed. "So he did his job too well?"

"My point is you're nothing like him. The fact you had to resort to sealing your emotions in a effort to be anything like him proves it. Shishio never had to that. You can prove to be much more valuable and trustworthy than your master ever was."

Saying such a thing to Soujiro would have once been one of the greatest insults to him. His whole life had revolved around being like Shishio. He had basically worshipped the man. Now though, his relief was visibly seen when his face softened at Kenshin's words to him.

Kenshin used the opportunity to approach Soujiro even if he gave off subtle signs to back away. Megumi had made it clear that Soujiro needed to get food in his stomach and that was something Kenshin would have to push onto Soujiro even if he remained obstinate. A person starving together with fighting a disease not only affected a person physically, but mentally. If he was going to get Soujiro to talk to him, he would rather Soujiro be more sound of mind.

He took the bowl from the tray near Soujiro and circled in front of him as he held the bowl down to him. "This is a vital step towards your recovery. You'll take the edge off everyone's worry for you if you'll eat just a bit."

Soujiro gazed at the bowl being held in front of him. He shifted his gaze back at Kenshin and shook his head. "No."

Kenshin decided he needed to put his foot down for Soujiro's own good, especially when Soujiro started to maneuver his feet beneath him to stand. He promptly sat the bowl down and lunged at him to force him back to his knees before he might exert himself too much. "Megumi made it clear you needed-"

Soujiro grabbed Kenshin's arm aside and twisted it behind him and tripped him to bring him in his knees instead. He followed through by reaching down at Kenshin's sword and drew it halfway so the sharp end was facing his neck. "I'm only sick, Kenshin. I'm not helpless and I'm not crippled... besides I would rather us not resolve our issues while I'm confined to a bed." He ended his words by releasing the sword and letting gravity return it to the sheath. "I'll eat at the table." Whether it was strange or not, it was Avaron who made the idea of it seem rather intiment to him. She had cared for him, including having served him tea with food and both had exchanged meaningful conversation while she was at his bedside. He did not want Kenshin to fit anywhere in that picture and end up tainting something he only wanted to treasure with Avaron. He only wanted to think of her being able to be that close to him.

Kenshin's eyes were wide. He was stun like a person walking and in a blink of an eye, was on their back and didn't know how it had happened. This was probably the one time he underestimated someone like Soujiro and it was only because of his illness and supposed muscle loss. He had doubted it because it seemed Soujiro was doubting his abilities. His weakness even now was seen in how he was panting softly, already exhausted after pulling his little stunt. He also knew if Soujiro had wanted to in that brief moment, he might have succeeded in taking Kenshin's life with his own sword.

Soujiro was irked when Kenshin only ended up smiling. For once, he was on the receiving end of it. "What are you smiling for?"

"I don't know what you're so worried about. Even if your full strength doesn't return, you still will have much to offer." He thought the words would be of encouragement, but instead, they had the opposite affect.

Soujiro arched his brow as he rested his back against the wall for a moment. He crossed his arms as he glowered back at Kenshin. "Why are you wearing your sword? Do you feel the need to arm yourself when bringing me food?" He didn't think he had been that hostile, despite seemingly to threaten Kenshin just now. Even if Kenshin had believed so, the fear was completely diminished after knowing Soujiro could have just taken his life a moment ago.

"No, that's not it," Kenshin assured as he stood to face him. He then tugged loosely at his reverse blade. " There's actually another reason not known to the others why I felt you should remain here."

Soujiro looked from the sword Kenshin only used to protect with. His fingertips then clenched into his sleeves as he turned his head aside. He already figured it out. Kenshin was wearing the sword not because he felt threatened by Soujiro, but rather, it was the opposite. "You think someone might try to assassinate me."

" As far as I know, few know the truth about Okubo Toshimichi's assassination but he still had loyal followers and they did not take news of his death well. For you to have gone with them would give anyone an opportunity to get even with you. It's unlikely but anyone that was loyal to him might have connections with the very people that were present in the dojo today and you were seen at your most vulnerable. It's Yamagata's goal to keep your idenity safe but sometimes it isn't enough. Even if you can defend yourself in your current state," Kenshin acknowledged, "you'll be better protected here until your strength returns."

Soujiro scoffed at that. "I guess you have thought of everything. I knew of the risk also," he said as he trudged passed Kenshin towards the table he would sit at. "Sadojima Houji could have told them everything before he shot himself."

"Yet, you still made yourself an open target," Kenshin risked saying making Soujiro come to a halt. He was talking about Soujiro's carelessness when he allowed himself to fall asleep at the door. Not only did he risk the cold affecting his health, but someone else could have taken advantage of his position. It was no wonder that the Meiji must already be watching the dojo closely. Anyone watching in could have gone beyond Yamagata's orders of just keeping surveillance and do worse by Soujiro.

"Maybe it was a little careless…." Soujiro admitted.

"You've made up your mind then." Kenshin assumed.

Soujiro gazed at him questionably. "About what?"

"You want to die."

Soujiro's eyes feel upon the ground as he carefully contemplated his next words. He then focused his gaze back on Kenshin. "You're wrong. I don't want to die. I started down the path as a swordsman because I thought it was the only way I could live."

"Because the strong live and weak die," Kenshin echoed the words Soujiro once lived by. "Shishio taught you that."

Soujiro shook his head. "No. Shishio made it clearer," he said it as he clutched his shoulder towards where the scars started on his back. "I had to be the strongest if I wanted to live. My life since has been spent trying to prove my worth." He still left Kenshin with the same questions as before as he approached the table to sit at. He wouldn't admit it, but it was taking too much energy to simply stand any longer. He needed to sit to be able to continue the conversation with Kenshin.

Kenshin eventually followed suit with Soujiro's meal once more and placed it front of him and took the lid off his bowl that had been keeping it warm. Eating just a little bit would give Soujiro some strength and soundness of mind as they would talk that night. Kenshin realized quickly he should have just lifted the lid off in the first place.

The aroma and steam coming off the broth immediately grabbed Soujiro's attention as he slowly brought his hands around the bowl in an effort to not appear too eager. Kenshin was relieved as Soujiro finally started eating. It was one less thing he had to worry about that night and could trust Soujiro would be less irritable and more open now that he was getting sustenance within him. After quietly slurping on his meal, Soujiro lowered the bowl slightly from his lips realizing Kenshin was still standing right beside him. He looks up towards him seeing Kenshin finding the silence awkward and lost at what to do.

Soujiro sighed and placed the bowl on the table. "You feel more like a prisonguard standing over me like that. Unless that's your intention, I don't care if you sit across from me."

Kenshin forced a nervous smile. "Oh no. It isn't my intention at all. I honestly just didn't know what you were more comfortable with."

"I don't care. Just do it." The words still came out cold and uninviting but Soujiro showed lenity when he pushed the pot of tea towards Kenshin encouraging him to pour a drink. Kenshin nodded gratefully and ended up pouring a drink for each them.

For a moment, Kenshin thought the worst was behind them. While it may be true, silence quickly fell between the two again leaving Kenshin not knowing how to get Soujiro to talk again. He stared awkwardly at his drink until he took a risk to meet Soujiro's gaze. By the time he looked, he noticed Soujiro's gaze was far off while his hand tugged towards his shoulder again. Kenshin felt a pang of guilt as he looked back on how he first trespassed in the room abd ended up startling the younger samurai. He felt partial blame for Soujiro lashing out towards him. Had he just knocked a little louder, maybe that night would have played out better for his sake. The last thing he wanted Soujiro to feel was embarrassment. His gaze momentarily fell towards the shoulder Soujiro tugged at. Even there he knew of a distinctive scar slightly different from the ones on his back. Kenshin, of all people, knew it was a scar only recieved from a blade while the rest were recieved from a whip. While helping Megumi dress his wounds, all they could do was wonder what hell Soujiro had been through. Kenshin wondered even now if he had somehow played a part in it with Soujiro holding such apathy towards him.

He focused his gaze back on Soujiro when he released a sigh of exasperation and met Kenshin's gaze. "You already knew of these scars, didn't you?" he asked when he felt the bandages through his clothes.

"You were hurt pretty bad that night," Kenshin said in reference to the fight with Chou. He still ended up answering his question. "You were incoherent through most of it."

"I see...I barely remember."

Silence set in again only because Kenshin just didn't know how to assure him it was simply okay. "I'm sorry I startled you tonight. I only trespassed because I thought something might be wrong. I'm not angry you snapped. You've had to accept a lot of changes. I don't know how anyone in your situation could act differently. Koharu's right though, we shouldn't just leave you completely alone because of it."

Soujiro nearly gave into a smile at the sound of her name. He could already picture her having begged Kenshin to come see him. "She's a tenacious girl."

"That she is," Kenshin agreed. Another awkward silence set in, however, Kenshin knew he was steadily softening Soujiro's heart towards him. Koharu had been right in that he just needed to hold his own ground against him to get through to him. It made sense. Looking back at their duel, Kenshin had ended up standing his ground and was more convinced of his truths than Soujiro was of Shishio's truths. Now, Soujiro was being reminded and assured he was not going to be left alone anymore. Soujiro knew he was in the wrong to believe otherwise, and knew now he would not be granted his solitude. There was nothing more he could do but accept that truth and make the best of it.

"Some of these scars I don't actually remember receiving," Soujiro admitted as he started to relay what Kenshin wished to know. He still tugged at his shoulder as he spoke. He never thought he would end up telling Kenshin any of it. Though, It was easier to let it out now that Kenshin knew Soujiro for who he really was. "….There… seems to be a small chapter of my life I have trouble recalling.…"

It was a moment before Soujiro spoke again. He struggled to know where to begin. "….I do know I never cared about these scars, not until I met Shishio."

Kenshin saw Soujiro's eyes searching his own past and became worried for his sake. He didn't want to end up making Soujiro recall memories he clearly had wanted to keep forgotten.

There were memories that Soujiro wanted to rediscover, however. Since meeting her, he had been trying harder to remember his brief time with Avaron and her father. It was the closest memory he would have of a normal childhood. He had long figured he had buried the memories because of how it all ended. It wasn't just the happiness that was quickly ripped away from him, but the misery that followed which led him to the numbness and emptiness he would feel for the next ten years. He had not put it together until Avaron admitted she felt it was their fault Soujiro had recieved such marks on his back. "Kenshin, do you believe that memories could be so painful that it's impossible to call them back to mind again?"

"Like some sort of a defense mechanism? If that's the case, wouldn't it be a good thing to not try to recall them?" He was surprised when Soujiro let out a soft laugh even though he clutched more tightly towards his shoulder.

"It doesn't make sense. Everyone has painful memories they rather not remember. There's still many that haunt me. I think what I desire to remember was forgotten, not because it was physically and emotionally painful, but because holding on to it would hold me back... at least in the eyes of Shishio it would. I needed to let it go to become strong. I don't know how I did it, but maybe sealing my emotions sealed some of these memories. The only good memories I had."

Kenshin was still unsure where Soujiro was going with the conversation. He wanted to be able to decipher Soujiro's words and meanings before he actually had to say it and save him the pain of just coming straight out to say it.

Soujiro continued. "But someone saw through the smile after all." He said it like he was realizing it for the first time. "I didn't know how it was supposed to be until I lived with them that brief time… and I still can't even remember it all."

"How what is supposed to be?" Kenshin risked asking.

"Being valued just the same … regardless of your background." A simple farm boy….Son of a prostitute.… "What it really is.…" Soujiro then shook his head as he still clutched at his shoulder. "The desire for it became so strong." He was, of course, talking about Avaron and her father. Even though they couldn't save him, it was the fact that not everyone had been blind to his pain. Pain he had been blinded to until he met them. Even now, their kind acts touched him as he tried to remember. The clearest memory he had been able to recall was not her father's face, but his strong arms that caught him before he fell and then waking up in Avaron's care and company.

From those hazy memories alone, he knew he had been welcomed as family by them and with what Avaron had relayed, her father was eager to get Soujiro away from his family. It wasn't what he necessarily wanted though.

"No matter how wonderful her family was to me, I desired it even more from my own family… from my own father who I rarely saw. So to finally taste what it should be like made me crave my own family's acceptance even more...I wanted their approval more than anything."

Finally, Kenshin was able to piece the important pieces together. "Your family rejected you."

"I ended up disregarding the family's kind acts towards me because at some point I knew I was never going to have that with my family..." Soujiro confirmed Kenshin's assumption. That realization had come when he was returned back to his abusive family's hands. He had been tied down and flogged it seemed to assure he would never earn their love and guarantee he would never run away again. "It became clearest that night… when they tried to kill me and let Shishio take the blame. Up to the last second I waited… and waited..." He closed his eyes in his angst." …. longing for someone strong to show me that mercy that family once extended to me...but they never did. No one did. Shishio's words only thumped louder and louder into my head, pushing all my hopes and desires out... until I was convinced of the truth. The strong live and weak die...So I did what had to be done and…finally drew the sword given to me by him... and killed them. Once I crossed that line, I didn't care to remember the kind deeds of that family. They had become weak in my eyes and thinking about it would weaken me as well. Like my emotions, I buried it deep until it was all forgotten." He seemed to be remembering as he spoke the words out loud to Kenshin.

Despite his voice constantly quivering as he spoke, he had been able to keep calm. Relating much of it to Koharu had already allowed for much pent up emotion and anger to escape to where he could be calm at this point. "Perhaps you are understanding now why I found your truths so puzzling and… laughable," he added as an after thought. "Even now, I'm alive because I had to be the strongest. If my own family rejected me and not a single other person had the power to save me or desired to, it must be true. The weak only exist to serve the strong."

Kenshin took a moment to absorb all that Soujiro had relayed to him. His eyes had fell heavily upon the table before them as Soujiro did his best to explain the inner turmoil he had suffered over the years. Kenshin knew he wouldn't be there that day if his master, Seijuro Hiko had not intervened. Kenshin was brave enough to fight that day, but there was no way of telling if he would have lived if those women, then Seijuro had not intervene to protect him. The actions of others is what protected his innocence as a child. All Kenshin had to do was imagine how his own life would have turned out if the people closest to him or his teacher hadn't been there. What would have been worse is if they had been there, but didn't care to show a single ounce of compassion or mercy and then be forced to kill in an effort to save his own life. Seeing it that way helped him best to empathize with Soujiro's pain and see the world as he had for most of his life. He could understand why Soujiro must have been agitated by Kenshin's truths. His truths were but childish fantasies to Soujiro.

"I'm sorry.…" Kenshin finally uttered. "I had no idea."

Soujiro shrugged it off and sipped from his cup. "You wanted to know why I held apathy towards you for so long. Now you know. Even if your truths are right, I learned them all too late and no matter how I look at it, I still would have had to kill my family." He suddenly started into a series of coughs. He was left with his back slightly hunched and clutching painfully at his chest and struggling to breathe. "I don't blame you for this Kenshin. But as a child I needed someone strong to show me different. That family, I'm sure their desire to save me was strong, but it wasn't enough. It had to be someone like you... Even now, I struggle between who is right. Because more often than not, the strong use the weak for their benefit." He then forced a laugh as he hunched over even more. "Look at me. I'm at the mercy of the Meiji. I'm more afraid of it than I am of this disease."

He looked up when Kenshin got up and knelt down beside him. "I can assure you, you have nothing to fear. You've already revealed today through your words and actions before Yamagata how valuable you may become. Even now, you're building his trust. The more trust you earn from the Meiji, the more freedom you'll be given. Maybe you can't be a wanderer anymore, but you can still use this time to make up for the wrong you've done while rebuilding your life and discovering your own truths."

He was unable to tell how those words were affecting Soujiro when he remained hunched over clutching at his chest. He only ended up starting into another series of coughs.

Kenshin risked placing a hand on shoulder, which caused Soujiro to jerk but didn't pull away. He still kept am indifferent gaze turned away. "Enough talk of sorrow. It will do nothing but weigh your heart down. I need to keep my word as well and keep the atmosphere around you lighthearted. Why don't I get Koharu to come visit with you for awhile? "

Now that he mentioned it, Soujiro realized this had been the longest he had been separated from her since meeting her. He had long accepted that Koharu would be clingy and that he had to be the one to be careful to not lose patience with her. He was surprised how long Koharu had managed to leave him alone that day to try and respect his wishes. He had half expected her to be the one to check on him without telling anyone about it, so it had been all the more startling to wake up to find Kenshin next to him.

He found good in that Koharu was learning not to be so clingy, but saddened to know what it must be doing to her. She knew he must be on the verge of giving up. He thought she might be distancing herself so not to watch allowing himself to waste away. It would be easier for Koharu to stay with the others who would help her to stay positive and then count on them to do the same for him.

"Soujiro?"

He turned his gaze up to Kenshin and nodded to him. "Yes... I'll see her."

Kenshin nodded kindly to him and left Soujiro alone momentarily to get her. He sat his cup down and brought the rag back up to his face when he started through a series of painful coughs again.

I better get back in bed before she ends up ordering me to.

He had only made it about halfway back to his bed when he heard the skimpering of her feet and then: "Sou!"

He rolled his eyes with a sigh but by the time he turned to face her, he was smiling. Koharu knew already it was a sincere smile and guessed it couldn't have gone terrible with Kenshin. Kenshin had come out of Soujiro's room with a similar lighthearted attitude. Soujiro got to his knees near his bed where she rushed to meet him. "How did it go? What did you tell him?"

"More than I imagined I would." Instead of explaining it to her, he raised his hand and placed it on her shoulder he had earlier wounded. Koharu grunted softly and grimaced causing his regret and guilt to resurface. Much of the undeserved attention had been given to him because of his own wounds and disease and he had heard little with how she had been faring after what he had done to her.

She snatched his hand into her grasp as she glared at him. "Don't! I've already forgotten about it. So should you."

He smiled, but it was a smile she knew he was forcing that time. If only if she knew what his actions against her had actually done. He was afraid of ever pushing her away again. He had cared for her since nearly the beginning, but everything changed now that he had been the one to nearly kill her. He wanted all the more to protect her and listen to her and he barely knew how to convey that to her. "I'm fortunate you are so forgiving. I don't deserve it."

His eyes widened when she let herself fall into him and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I'd be worse off if I cared to hold such a grudge."

He chuckled softly. "I'm not sure if that's comforting either." It reminded him of what was to come when he had to leave her. He knew Kenshin wasn't just going to let her live off the streets after he is forced to leave, but he didn't want to expect Kenshin to continue looking after her. Even so, it would bring comfort to Soujiro to know that Koharu would be in the care of someone strong and capable like Kenshin. Koharu had even recieved special attention in a way Soujiro could never give. Already, Koharu had adopted some manners from Avaron, seemed to look up to Kaoru and Megumi. The short time with the women had already influenced Koharu in a way that she was acting more like a girl than she ever knew how to be. It would be nice if Koharu could keep all that.

"Do you like it here?"

Koharu pulled away to meet his gaze. "You asked that at the Ochies." She already knew where the conversation was leading.

"Except I really can't stay with you," he reminded her. "I have no -"

For once, Koharu got to cover his mouth with her palm. "Stop thinking about it! It's a long ways from now. Besides, if it's my home, it makes it your home too. They know we're a packaged deal."

My home? The idea of it had never crossed his mind until now. He wasn't sure how much he would be gone at a time but if this was where Koharu was to reside, this is where he would end up coming back and residing. It's one more reason to not keep pushing Kenshin and the others away. He closed his eyes in defeat and ended up coughing back in the rag he still held. As he coughed, Koharu took hold of his arm and urged him to stand. "Get back in bed, Sou and get better. Then I'll play my music box like you wanted." She said it as if to bribe him with it.

She helped him stand and take the few steps back to his bed. He struggled to not fall pathetically back against the futon and ended up leaning on Koharu for more support than he wanted to admit. Finally, he was back resting sitting slightly upright against the wall to be able to breathe wth more ease. He was already dozing off when he heard the soft chimes of her music box being played for him. He opened his eyes briefly to watch her as she played the gentle tune a few times through with her hopeful smile.

She said even when she had a brother and a father, it never felt like home…not until she met me. Perhaps I've felt the same but never wanted to admit it. It never felt like this with my family, not even with Shishio and Yumi.

By the time Koharu finished playing her music box though, he was almost completely asleep. She remained through most of the night keeping a firm but gentle hold of his hand. She remained by his side until Megumi and Kenshin eventually returned to urge her to also get some rest. At first, she tried to resist their polite request until she saw her stubbornness risked disturbing Soujiro from his needed rest. She was able to find great comfort when Kenshin promised he would remain with Soujiro through the night so someone could help him in anyway if he needed it.

"How is he?" Kenshin asked Megumi a few minutes after Koharu had left.

Megumi was checking Soujiro's temperature and listening carefully to his breathing to best determine where his health was headed. "His temperature is rising back up," she was able to confirm. "His breathing hasn't changed for the better." So it was difficult to say, in other words. There was some comfort in knowing his temperature was rising back up. She looked up towards Kenshin who stood near the door where Soujiro had earlier been resting against. His hand rested against the hilt of his sword and he seemed to be on alert. It didn't surprise her that Soujiro would need that kind of guarding. She was sure someone like Soujiro had made plenty of enemies and there had never been a better time for someone to make an assassination attempt on him. Soujiro couldn't have a better guardian than Kenshin, this Megumi knew well. In that sense, Soujiro would be all right.

"Have you two made up?" Megumi whispered as she approached Kenshin.

Kenshin's eyes fell on the floor when he ended up exhaling out loud. He looked towards Soujiro than back at her. "Its difficult to say. He's not resenting me for nothing. In some ways I do feel responsible for his suffering. According to my truths, his life should have turned out completely different. In his eyes, even now, Shishio's truths make more sense than mine. Without saying it, he makes it clear he wishes they weren't."

"The strong live and weak dies. Honestly, there is truth to it," Megumi remarked as she looked towards Soujiro. "Those stronger often abuse their power and lord it over the weak. He suffered the grim side of that truth, yet, he managed to overcome that dark truth by rescuing and taking in Koharu." She knew that well because Koharu had made sure that all within the dojo knew of Soujiro's heroic deeds. "He had to do that completely on his own. He had to prove himself and his former master wrong, which couldn't have been easy." She then smirked at Kenshin as she crossed her arms. "That may have also contributed to some of his apathy towards you. A good student is devoted to his master. Trying to not live solely by such a truth probably felt like he was betraying his master, which is dishonoring of all for the student. It all started because of you."

Kenshin raised a brow. "Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

Megumi's smirk remained. "It makes it more understandable why he's having a hard time opening up to you. The closer he gets to us, the more he is letting his master and his teachings down. Could you do that to your master?"

"… you have a point," Kenshin uttered in defeat. He could never imagine betraying Seijuro Hiko. It would be devastating to rise up in any way against his master. In fact, it would cut Kenshin to the heart and Soujiro had managed to do it even while Shishio was alive.

"He's making progress in that sense," Megumi acknowledged. "We just have to continue to be patient with him. One day it won't be so hard for him." They both looked towards Soujiro when he released a series of coughs and shifted in discomfort in his sleep. They could hear the shortness in each breath Soujiro managed to take before he managed to settle in a more comfortable position to sleep.

"He just has to hold out so we all can see such a time for his sake."

I hope this wasn't boring! It's actually why I held back for so long in posting this chapter. I kept reading it over thinking of how to make it more interesting and decided if I didn't post it soon, it would never get posted or I would end up rushing the ending too much DX